All Those Years Ago
by LovelyBirdxx5
Summary: When Rachael left Paul all those years ago, he hadn't a clue why. Now she's back with a huge secret of her own.
1. Chapter 1

**_A/N: Hey, I think I deleted my story or something, but I'm reposting it. I've written alot recently, tell me what you think! :)_**

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_Rachael __awoke with a start__, with wavering eyes she glanced at the alarm clock 6:45._

_"Shit" she muttered, quickly rolling out of bed heading into her closet where she chose a white sun dress and a pair of heels. _

_She grimaced at the site of them, they reminded her too much of her modeling days. After styling her hair she switched off the bathroom lights and headed out into the hallway of the flat trying not to make too much noise that would disturb her guests. Her best friend Tessa and her young son William were staying with them while their flat was being renovated. She hastily__ made a right and slowly peeked into her daughter's room. She stifled a laugh at the site she saw. Atop the bed was her 5 year old daughter Lillian cocooned in her blanket with only her face peeking out. Rachael stepped closer to the bed studying her daughters face and feeling a slight pull at her heart, she looked exactly like him. The droopy eyes and the petite little nose- she was a dead giveaway for him. After watching the little sleep for a moment longer she pushed the memories away and bent down to kiss her daughters forehead. The little girl's eyes fluttered as she pulled herself away from slumber._

_Rachael's P.O.V_

_I watched as my little daughter opened her eyes._

"_Hi mummy" _

_I couldn't help but laugh, the little girl had taken up an English accent, a far contrast from my own American drawl. It's not as if Lillian had known otherwise considering we had been living here in England for almost two years. _

"_Morning Lil, we have to hurry up and get ready, were running a bit late and we have to get you over to Nan's before I go to work."_

_The little girl smiled again hopping out of bed towards her bathroom. I opened Lily's armoire picking out an outfit for her, a dark blue polka doted baby doll dress was the outfit of choice; I set it down on her bed leaving the room to go start making breakfast._

_Lillian's P.O.V_

_Eyes fluttering open she saw her mum._

"_Hi mummy" She said with a grin._

"_Morning Lil, we have to hurry up and get ready, we're running a bit late and we have to get you over to Nan's before I go to work." _

_Lillian nodded and smiled, she loved Nan. Nan always gave her cookies with promises that she wouldn't tell her mum. Lil hopped out of bed and headed towards her bathroom. She pulled up a stool to the sink and stepped on top of it to reach the counter. She washed her face and brushed her teeth. She combed her silky dark-brown hair with little effort considering it was already straight and looked tangle free. She pulled a ribbon out of her drawer and tied it in her hair the same way mummy had taught her. After finishing and looking herself over in the mirror she was satisfied with the effort. Lillian hopped down from the stool and headed back into her bedroom where Rachael had already set out an outfit for her. She pulled the dress over her head making sure not to mess up the ribbon. The little girl smoothed down the dark blue dress and proceeded to the kitchen. She climbed into the wooden chair and situated herself. She looked around and noticed that Phillip wasn't there. Lillian grinned and thought what a great day it was going to be without him. Phillip was mum's 'friend' and Lil didn't like him very much, not that she was going to tell mum. Whenever Phillip was around Lillian made herself scarce. It wasn't that she hated Phillip; it was just that he made her feel uncomfortable. Phillip tried to play with her, and was friendly to her but there was just something about him that she didn't like. _

_Rachael's POV_

_I finished browning the toast and set it on the table. Buttering a slice I handed it to Lil. Lil made a face at it looking straight at me._

"_Lillian you have to at least have a bite of breakfast." I told the strong willed five year old._

"_But mum, I don't like it very much." I knew the fact quite well that Lillian detested breakfast but stood firm in my decision. _

"_Lil at least 2 bites and then you can be done."_

_The little girl looked at the toast and glanced back at me with her sad looking puppy dog eyes. I nodded to her and she took a bite with a second one to back it up. She quickly swallowed giving me thumbs up, I couldn't help but be absolutely charmed with her, she had a way with people._

"_Good, ready to go to Nan's?"_

_Lillian hopped down from the table pulling me along with her. After locking up the flat we hurried to the elevator pushing the button until the doors slid open. Stepping inside I glanced at my wrist watch, we had more than enough time to make it to Nan's._

_7:15_

_The pair had successfully made it to Nan's house and the little girl knocked on the door. A moment or so later a kindly old woman opened the door and enveloped Lillian into a hug. Nan beamed up at Rachael and shooed the little girl inside._

"_Come 'ead, love come inside." said Nan in her Liverpool accent. Rachael loved the sound of Nan's voice. It was comforting to hear the Liverpool accent coming from someone who lived in such a posh place. They were in a well-to-do area of London called St. John's Wood. Rachael glanced down at her watch and figured she had a few moments to spare. She accepted the offer and stepped into the woman's house heading towards the kitchen. _

_Nan's P.O.V._

_She heard tapping and instantly knew her favorite little girl, Lillian, had come to visit. She had been taking care of Lillian since her and her mother had moved to England. She remembered the day she had met the pair. Nan was sitting on a bench in Regents Park enjoying the sunshine. A little girl had waddled up to her and just stood there looking at her with a smirk on her face and those unmistakably adorable droopy eyes, the strange part of this encounter was that the toddler was all alone. Nan smiled back at the little girl asking her where her mummy was. The little girl wasn't old enough to talk yet and continued smiling. Not a minute later came a young women calling out "Lillian, Lillian!" the little girl turned around looking at her frantic mother. The women rushed up to her and snatched her up in a hug. "Don't ever run away from me again!" said the mother in an American accent. After a moment she looked at the old women who sat on the bench beside her. The old women looked back at her with a warm smile "Don't worry the little lass has been keeping me company." The woman looked relieved and introduced herself. "Rachael Belter" she had said. Nan introduced herself likewise immediately recognizing her. She was the girl who was on the cover of every fashion magazine imaginable at one time or another. "You're not from 'round 'ere are you lovey?" the young woman shook her head telling Nan her story. Apparently she had just moved to England with the money her parents had left her when they passed. Nan noted how young the woman seemed. When questioned, the girl looked a bit down. "My parents were in an accident and I had to get away from the madness so I packed up the baby and myself and moved on over here." Rachael didn't feel at all uncomfortable telling the old woman her story. Nan had a motherly way about her; Rachael felt much at ease around the woman. Nan nodded, "You certainly picked a nice place to move" the girl nodded. Nan then offered to show Rachael around, not soon after they had become a part of her life almost daily. Lillian was dropped off most mornings as her mother headed off to work. The old woman enjoyed having the company especially since her husband had died and her children had grown up and moved away. Lillian kept Nan stepping and she loved every minute of it. Nan shook the thought out of her head and opened the door. Lillian jumped into her arms and she squeezed her back. _

"_Come 'ead, love come inside."Nan offered to Rachael. She noted a slight hesitation but Rachael came in making her way to the kitchen. _

_Rachael's POV_

_After having a quick cup of tea I bid goodbye to Nan, caught my little girl for a kiss, then promptly left to head to the office. Currently I was working as a part time secretary, not that I actually needed the job or the money in any way. In fact the inheritance from my parents along with savings from my modeling career supplied me with more than enough to live comfortably without ever needing to work again. But more than anything I loved being busy and having an actual purpose, even if that purpose was being a secretary. _

_I made my way into a high-rise office building climbing up to the 4__th__ floor. I greeted coworkers along the walk to my boss's office. Today was the day I was being reassigned to a company in dire need of a new secretary after theirs had suddenly retired. The boss saw me coming and without a word he signaled to a piece of paper with an address written down on it as he continued speaking on the phone. I glanced down at the address immediately feeling my stomach drop. __**'3 Abbey Road, St. John's Wood' **__flashed in front of my eyes. I knew exactly who I was going to be working for, The Beatles. Memories filled my head making me feel ill. Without a word I waved to the boss managing a weak smile. I maintained composure long enough to reach my desk which was still in the process of being packed up. Needing space and a place to clear my head I rushed into the bathroom and entered a stall. I stood there feeling silly, but stayed letting the memories creep back in._

_The year was 1962 and 18 year old Rachael Belter was a huge name on the modeling scene. Her agent, Brielle Walters, had discovered her at a charity event two years prior that Rachael's parents were hosting. The 16 year old was delighted when Brielle had made the offer to have her featured in Vogue magazine. Rachael's parents wholeheartedly agreed and allowed their daughter to do whatever she felt was a wise decision. She was signed in June of 1960 and loved every minute of being a model. The outfits, the jewelry and especially the people she got to meet were a dream come true for her. After her first shoot, her career sky rocketed and she became extremely well known. Some time near February of 1962 her agent decided that she should start to be promoted overseas. Rachael quickly agreed to the idea and they headed out to London. It only took until March until she became an absolute hit with the crowd there too. That was until she met the Beatles. It October 4__th__ 1962, and the Beatles were shooting an appearance on the BBC's 'The Talent Spot'. Rachael walked into the studio and was immediately ushered into a back dressing room where she came face to face with the band. At the time they had just become very popular in England and were scheduled to start their British tour. As she walked in through the doors her agent introduced her to the boys and told her to stay put for a minute because she had papers to retrieve. Rachael was terribly shy at first until John broke the ice._

"'_Ey lads we've seen this bird before!" Each of them studied her for a minute and a look of realization crossed their faces._

"_You're the girl in all the fashion magazines aren't ya?" Paul blurted out._

"_You read them?" Rachael giggled, each of the boys busted out laughing aside from a blushing Paul. John reached out and clapped Paul on the back, _

_"That's our Paulie!" he said. Paul pushed John's hand away and laughed a little,_

_"I don't read 'em, but the pictures come in handy you see" Paul said cheekily as he winked at her. The boys elbowed each other and howled with laughter. I laughed along with them and locked eyes with Paul he smiled back and the group of us continued talking. After some time their manager walked in and told them they were going to be here a while on a count of the studio was backed up. None of the boys seemed to mind a bit she noticed. They all continued talking and soon after Brielle came back, "It appears that we are traveling to Germany to do a shoot my dear", Brielle informed the young star. The guys apparently had taken a liking to Rachael because Paul blurted out, _

_"We're going to Germany the 18__th__, why doesn't she travel with us?" the rest of the lot agreed and Brielle consented. It looked as though I was traveling to Germany with the Beatles._

_The 18__th__ finally rolled around and I met the boys at the airport. When they made it to the plane I chose a spot and was followed immediately by Paul. I smiled as he sat down and we began to talk. John apparently saw the exchange and exclaimed loud enough for everyone to hear, _

_"He fancies you like mad", George, their new drummer Ringo, and their manager snickered. I blushed and looked over at Paul who was shooting daggers from his eyes at John. Boy, if looks could kill! John put up a hilarious smile and winked at him. After the pair finally cooled down we began talking right through the flight. After landing in Germany a car came to pick me up. With promises to come see them at the Star Club I left. I managed to see them at the club quite often in fact, seeing the group almost every day made Paul and I inseparable. I watched as they performed song after song for the enthusiastic crowd, it was apparent at the time that they were one of the best bands she had ever seen. I don't want to seem biased but truly they were a spectacular sight to see, the music was spot on and their energy was contagious. _

_Most of the days in Germany I spent with Paul, we truly became attached at the hip. Even during their performances in the club he would sit me in an area with my friends so that he could see from the stage and keep an eye on me. He was a bit overbearing and protective at times but he made it up for this with his charming disposition and adorable looks. I believe during this time I got to know Paul better than I had known anyone else before, even my own family. He told me about his childhood and family. He even told me about his mother, Mary, and how she had had breast cancer eventually dying from it. To this day those stories he told me stuck with me, but more than anything there was almost always a constant reminder of Paul around, his daughter. _

_During my time in Germany Paul and I were intimate from day one. It was probably poor planning on my part by not using any form of protection, but we were young and in love, nothing else seemed to matter. After the first two weeks in Germany I had a feeling something wasn't right. I was way past late and I felt sick. I made an appointment with the doctor where they had confirmed my suspicions. I was pregnant with Paul's child. Surprisingly enough I wasn't in the least bit worried about having a baby. It gave me an excuse to break my modeling career that had become tiresome. A person could only take so much of the media hounding and the never ending publicity until they become completely fed up. The only thing I was a bit hesitant about was telling Paul… so I didn't. I fled Germany without a goodbye to any of the Beatles. They were on the brink of international fame and a baby would only be a distraction. Brielle was disappointed when she found out but she managed to keep it extremely discreet and told no one of my situation. The only other person who knew was my friend Tessa who I had known since I was born, she was the first and only person (besides Brielle) who knew my secret. _

_Lillian Mary Belter was born June 18__th__ of 1963 weighing 5 lb. and 6 oz. Tessa was alongside me the entire time. She was also preparing for the birth of her son William. As soon as she was cleaned up the nurse presented me with Lillian. I peeked down at my newborn daughter studying her pink, wrinkled up face. She looked exactly like him. My throat closed as the nurse handed Tessa forums that she would help me fill out to get the baby's information. We both decided that we would put Paul down as the birthfather but give the baby my last name. It was official, I had a daughter._ _Tessa, William, Lillian, and I were sort of a family in a way. I was auntie to William and Tessa was auntie to Lillian. William's father had left when he found out that Tessa was pregnant, not that she minded though. He was from a high powered family and a baby would only tarnish his image. He was much too self-involved to be raising a child. Although he did send child support he was in no way apart of Tessa's and more importantly William's life. _

_Tessa and I worked together to bring the babies up. At a point we even shared a flat that was until I met Phillip._ _Phillip and I met at a friend's party where we talked for a while, eventually becoming very close. He didn't mind the fact that I had a daughter, and I didn't mind the fact that he was a bit stuffy. At the time I wasn't looking for something long term but he insisted we move in together. After much persuasion I relented and we found a flat. Our relationship never really went far. Today we resembled something of an old married couple. Most of the time he was off at work leaving Lillian and I to do or own thing, and he to do his. Lillian never referred to him as 'daddy', not that she was expected to and I think that put Phillip off a bit. When he tried to play with Lillian she would have no part in it. He simply was not good with children and that even put me off a bit. I've thought about ending the relationship multiple times but I really didn't see the point, it wasn't if he was around all that often. _


	2. Chapter 2

_This brought me back to present day; I was still standing in the bathroom stall. I quickly exited walking back to my desk. No one had noticed my absence, thank god, so I finished packing and with a final wave I was off. I deposited my belongings back at the apartment turning my attention back to the piece of paper that held the address. I still wasn't thinking straight, thoughts of quitting crossed my mind but that wasn't the answer. I was going to have to face my problems like an adult and with any luck my problems wouldn't be at the office today._ _I stepped into the studios tentatively glancing around, a women from the front desk caught sight of me,_

"_Hello, how may I help you?"_ _I smiled at her and strode over offering my hand,_

"_Rachael Belter, I've been assigned here."_ _The woman smiled back, _

_"Oh! So nice to meet you, yes we have been expecting you, now if you will follow me" she said motioning to the door behind the desk. She must have noticed me looking around,_

"_You don't have to worry, they aren't in today, no need to be nervous dear, they are nice boys" She was obviously referring to the Beatles so I nodded and followed her to the back. After settling down she handed me a file of papers that needed to be filled out, mostly my personal information, finally we were finished._

"_Well I think that's all I have for you today; if you could just turn those forms in tomorrow I think we can get started." She smiled once again and headed out the door. I packed up my things and left the office. As soon as I was outside a huge sigh of relief rushed out from me. I had really dodged a bullet, I hadn't really thought about what I would do if I had saw any of the boys, would they still recognize me? Of course they would, it's only been a few years. I had no idea what I was going to do. I finished the day by picking up Lillian from Nan's and returning home. I kept busy filling out forms while trying not to think of tomorrow. Even though I dreaded it I was going to have to face it, maybe if I got out of the office soon enough tomorrow they would never know I had been there. I grinned at the plan, it was perfect. From what I remembered none of the boys were up until noon, they say old habits die hard, hopefully this was the case. I finished my work and sent Lillian to bed. I got ready for bed myself and eased into sleep knowing my plan was going to work. _

_September 18, 1968 6:30 p.m._

_I had successfully made it through day 2 as a secretary. So far I hadn't come into contact with any of the Beatles. After fiercely scribbling down notes for tomorrow, I began to pack up to go. Lil was going to be dropped off by Nan so we could grab some dinner. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the front doors opening. I turned towards the door expecting to see my daughter, but instead a man in long striped pants and a furry coat came rushing in._

"_It's freezing out there, could 'ave frozen me nuts off" the man exclaimed fiercely to no one in particular. He strode towards my desk stopping before it to stare at me with a look of utter confusion on his face._

"_You're not Chris." He said in a questioning manner (Chris was their usual secretary). He continued to look at me until his eyes shot completely open, _

_"RACHAEL? Bloody fucking hell is that you?" __I managed a sheepish grin while he came rushing around the desk pulling me into a suffocating hug._

"_Hello John" I managed to squeak despite the lack of oxygen. He let go holding me at arm's length looking me up and down._

"_You look fantastic my dear!" He complimented. After letting go we began talking, catching up with each other's lives. He did most of the talking going on and on about the trip to Germany and how I had left._

"_Why did you leave? One minute you were there, then poof! You were gone. No one would tell us where the hell you went. There better have been a good reason! Because-" The front doors swooshed open again cutting John off._

"_HI MUM!" my over excited five year old screeched running up to me, throwing her arms around my legs. I glanced out the window and saw Nan pull off in her car._ _Shit, shit, shit my mind went completely blank. I picked Lillian up holding her and looking over at John. His mouth was hanging open, he looked almost deflated. There was an awkward silence. I walked slowly over to John, Lillian still in my arms._

"_John, this is my reason for leaving. Her name is Lillian." My eyes began to cloud up with tears._ _I watched as Lillian studied John. It was a long minute before she reached out her arms towards him. He took her from my arms and held her studying her face. His face was completely drained of any color. _

"_She's his isn't she?" A tear escaped my eye making its way down my face. Lillian and John still had their eyes locked on each other._

"_Yeah" I said in a tiny voice. We were the only 3 people in the whole entire building. The noise was deafening. _

"_He doesn't know, does he?" John finally broke eye contact with Lillian staring straight at me._

"_No, he doesn't. No one knew." Lillian was still looking at John. I guess she had decided that she liked him because she took the glasses perched on his nose and put them on her own face. She stuck her tongue out at him and wiggled her eyebrows. Her silly antics broke the tension in the room, and John busted out laughing._

"_She's a pain in the arse, takes after her father I see." This got me laughing and before I knew it the three of us were in hysterics. Lillian of course still had no idea what we were laughing about but laughed along with us anyway. She placed the glasses back on John's face and looked over at me with a grin._

"_Do you think you could watch her for a minute, I need to go clean up?" I asked John, he nodded at me and began to chat with Lillian. I went to the secretaries bathroom and cleaned the smudged makeup from my tears and applied some more. I still couldn't believe what had just happened. John knew about Lillian. _

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_Nan dropped Lillian off in front of the Studio. Nan opened the door for her as she hopped out of the car racing towards the building doors trying to get out of the cold. She was so excited she could barely contain it. She had missed mom even though it had only been a few hours since she had last seen her._

"_HI MUM!" she screeched as she walked in. She spotted mum and ran over to her, throwing her little arms around her mothers' legs. Mum reached down to pick her up and give her a hug. It took a moment for Lillian to realize there was someone else in the room. Mum said something to the man that was standing right next to them. _

_Lil turned herself to get a look at the man. She looked him over; she couldn't help but feel extremely drawn to the man. She reached out her arms towards him and he picked her up. The pair locked eyes with each other while the man said a few words to her mum. After a few minutes the room was silent and she had decided that she liked this guy very much. She pulled his eye glasses from his face and put them on. 'Whoa she thought, he must be blind, everything looks weird from behind these glasses. Mum and the man who was apparently named John started to laugh loudly at her. Lil shrugged and guessed she had done something silly, she took this as instructions to laugh too. Mum had left to go to the bathroom so she was left alone with John. He put her down and got down to her level._

"_Would you like to come and color with me?" he asked. She nodded immensely, she loved coloring. She reached for his hand as he led her down the hall to the studio. Lillian liked this stranger and decided that he must be a part of her family, an uncle maybe? Yes that was it, Uncle John. She liked the sound of it; he was officially her uncle John from now on. _

_Johns P.O.V_

_John led the little girl down the hallway and into studio pair sat on the floor with a few sheets of paper and some markers he had found near the soundboard As soon as the little girl began coloring he had no doubt at all this was Paul's daughter. She was coloring, Left handed might he add, and the child was an exact clone of Paul. The dark hair, droopy eyes, incredibly long lashes. This child was the __epitome__ of McCartney. He still couldn't believe what he had just found out though; Paul and Rachael had a kid. _

_He obviously knew that they all had children out there, each of them had pulled so many birds on tour it was entirely too hard to keep count. Usually when there was a paternity claim one of the lawyers took care of the situation any way they could, usually they got away with a payment and a confidentiality agreement. But this was completely different; this child came from someone each of the boy's cared deeply about. __John flinched as he remembered how hard Paul took it when Rachael left. No explanation, she just disappeared, no one gave them the slightest clue of where she might have gone. If they had God knows Paul would have tracked her down. After Rachael had left, Paul was a complete wreck. He turned into a belligerent drunk (well way more than usual), and after coming back to London he wouldn't come out of his house for days. It took him almost a year to recover, and it was still a sore spot with him even though it had been years. He still couldn't process how the fuck they were going to tell Paul that he had a kid. Rachael sure as hell didn't want to tell him and neither did he. There was no telling how Paul was going to react. John turned his focus back to Lillian or more importantly where Lillian had just been coloring. Where did the lass go?_

_Rachael's P.O.V_

_I quickly finished retouching my eye makeup. I had to hurry, in any minute Paul and the other Beatles would be here and I had no intention of seeing any of them. After finishing in the bathroom I quickly tidied up my desk and surveyed the room for any sign of John or Lillian. They were nowhere to be found. After a hurried moment I remembered, Studio 2! That's where they must be. I rushed across the hallway only to crash into a man walking by. As we collided he managed to keep on his feet and he caught me holding me at arm's length._

"_Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean-"I quickly stopped apologizing realizing who I had just bumped into. It was Paul._

"_No really love it's completely fine my fault-"He looked down at my face and I saw it completely drop._

"_Ra-…. Rachael..?" He stammered. I couldn't speak, my heart had stopped and I felt the blood rush from my face, ears ringing. He finally let loose the grip he had on my arm. We stood staring at each other for what seemed like an eternity. _

"_How..? Wait, whoa..." He couldn't seem to put the words together, neither could I. _

"_Hi Paul, uh nice to see you…" I stuttered in barely a whisper._

"_Yeah… nice. What are you doing here?" He was still obviously confused._

"_I erm got assigned here for a job. So, how… how have you been?" I stammered ineffectively trying to hide my nervousness._

"_Good. Fine actually. Where did you go? I mean why… why did you leave?" He was still trying to put everything together in his head. I cringed outwardly at his question, and he noticed. _

"_Well I, I mean we-"Little footsteps followed by thundering loud footsteps cut me off. A smiling Lillian toddled into the entrance room followed by a frantic John trying to catch her. John stopped noticing Paul and then looked over at me. Everyone in the room stopped silent. He muttered something about the weather and rushed out of the office. Lillian stood between Paul and I with arms reaching out for me to pick her up. I bent down hoisting her up onto my hip, a surprising feat may I add given the fact that I was wearing heels AND a miniskirt. __Lillian piped up breaking the silence in the room, _

_"Mummy uncle John and I colored." _

"_Uncle John?" Paul said with his eyebrows furrowed. Lillian turned towards Paul for the first time looking straight at him. I watched as realization spread across Paul's face, a hand shot up to his mouth, it looked as though he might be sick. _

_Paul's P.O.V_

_Paul walked into the studio shutting the door closed behind him. It was already 7:00 and had been dark out for a few hours. The plan for the session tonight was just to overdub a few tracks for their new album. He wiped his feet on the map and proceeded to walk into the front office. No one else was there. This wasn't entirely strange considering the late hour. Most of the secretaries would have gone home by now. He continued walking past the desk making his way to studio 2. All of the sudden a women collided with him. As soon as she was about to fall Paul reached out to grab her and held her up._

"_Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean-"she explained quickly. Where had he heard that voice before?_

"_No really love it's completely fine my fault-"He looked down at her and immediately recognized her face. It was Rachael._

"_Ra-…. Rachael..?" He stammered. His heart had stopped and he felt the blood rush from his face, ears ringing. He finally let loose the grip he had on her arm. The two of them stood staring at each other for what seemed like an eternity. _

"_How..? Wait, whoa..." He couldn't seem to put the words together._

"_Hi Paul, uh nice to see you…" Rachael stuttered in barely a whisper._

"_Yeah… nice. What are you doing here?" He was beyond confused, what the hell was she doing here?_

"_I erm got assigned here for a job. So, how… how have you been?"She answered._

"_Good. Fine actually. Where did you go? I mean why… why did you leave?" He was still trying to put everything together in his head. He noticed she flinched when he had asked the question._

"_Well I, I mean we-"She started, little footsteps followed by thundering loud footsteps cutting her off. A smiling little girl walked into the entrance room followed by a frantic John trying to catch her. John stopped noticing Paul and then looked over at Rachael. Everyone in the room stopped silent. He muttered something about the weather and rushed out of the office. The girl stood between Rachael and him with arms reaching out for Rachael to pick her up. She bent down hoisting the girl onto her hip. _

"_Mummy uncle John and I colored." The little girl told Rachael._ _Paul's mind was racing. John didn't have any nieces? _

"_Uncle John?"He said with his eyebrows furrowed. __The little girl turned towards Paul for the first time looking straight at him. Thoughts raced through his mind 'Holy shit, it's like looking in a fucking mirror.' His mouth hung open in disbelief, who was this kid?_

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Silence surrounded the three of us. The door opened again breaking the silence. John, George and Ringo came walking quickly past us without saying a word. John must have told them what had happened. Paul didn't seem to notice them going by, he just stood there his mouth slightly open. I decided the silence had gone on long enough._

"_Paul, this is Lillian. She's…. well she's the reason I had to leave Germany."_ _Paul just stood there his face unmoving and breath coming out in short gasps. I was no better. A few tears ran down my cheeks. I took a deep breath and decided it was now or never._

"_Lillian's your daughter." __The tears came rushing out and I made no effort to stop them. I put Lillian down and crouched down eye-level with her._

"_Lil this is your daddy." I said motioning at Paul._ _Paul walked over and got down to his knees. Lillian looked over at me and then back to Paul. I could see the tears in Paul's eyes. _

"_Hi, Lil." Paul managed to croak out. I could see that he was trying not to cry._ _Lillian reached for my hand. She was obviously a bit nervous. It took a minute before she decided what she was going to do. She let go of my hand and took a tentative step towards Paul reaching out for him. He pulled her into a tight hug slightly rocking her. We both stood up, he still holding Lillian, and I a complete wreck. He reached out an arm for me and pulled me into the hug. We stood there for what seemed like forever._

"_You should've told me." He whispered quietly into my ear. I stepped back shaking my head._

"_It wouldn't have been fair."_ _I could see Paul swallow. He knew I was right but he wouldn't admit it. _

"_We need to talk about this." He said looking at Lillian. I nodded, he put Lillian down and the three of us walked towards the studio door. When we walked in they all stopped what they were doing and stared at us._

"_Do you guys mind keeping an eye on her for a minute?" Paul asked the room. Everyone shrugged and agreed._

"_Sure mate." John told him and he motioned for Lillian who ran to her beloved uncle John. __The pair of us walked out of the studio and stood there awkwardly._

"_Fancy a walk?" Paul asked tentatively. _

"_I guess so." I told him._ _Paul led me out of the studio only pausing slightly to hold the door for me. Thankfully it was late enough outside and there were no fans or reporters. The only downside was that it was still a bit chilly even though I was wearing my coat. We slowly strolled down the sidewalk not saying much at first. I started to shiver a little, maybe it was from the cold but it was probably my nerves. Paul noticed and he put an arm around my shoulder pulling me close enough to him to keep warm. We continued walking; it was Paul who finally broke the silence. _

"_So she's why you left?"_ _I just nodded not really feeling that I could find my voice._

"_She's beautiful you know?" Now he was looking down at me, but we still continued walking. I glanced up at him for a moment and continued to look forward._

"_She looks exactly like you. She even acts like you." I said smiling sadly. __Paul looked amused but also a bit down._

"_You didn't have to leave you know? I could've taken care of you two. I-"_

"_Paul don't say that" I quickly interrupted him, "You guys were just about to make it; a baby would have been a distraction."  
We stopped walking now we were facing each other. _

_"It would've been unfai-"_

"_Rachael don't you dare say that." Paul was angry now, _

_"Don't you dare say it would've been unfair. You know what's unfair? You got to be there and I didn't. You got to watch her grow up and I didn't. Hell, you even got to sit up with her when she was ill, or was feeling lonely and I didn't. You got to be there when she started to walk, fuck; you even got there when she first opened her eyes. You got to and I didn't. Now tell me how the hell I was the one it was going to effect?"_

_ He took a deep breath and with his shoulders slightly hunched over he started to cry._ _I didn't say anything I just stood there feeling like an idiot. But he kept going._

"_Christ, I don't even know her birthday, what her favorite color is, I don't even know her favorite stories." __He stopped his rant looking defeated. I was still standing there, not knowing what to say._

"_Well, what can you tell me about her?" he asked in a whisper. He sniffled a bit and his teary gaze looked up into my eyes hoping for answers. He looked like a scared little child. I walked up to him and opened my arms; he pulled me into a tight hug, our cheeks touching._

"_Alright well, her name is Lillian Mary Belter."_

"_Her middle name's my mum's?" He said_

"_Yeah" and I continued. "She was born June 18__th__, 1963 at King's College Hospital." He pulled back a little from the hug looking a bit stunned, _

_"My birthday?"_

_ "Yes." I said and I kept going,_

_ "She is allergic to bees. She's even left-handed. The way she talks too, I can't describe it but she is like you in every way possible." Paul kept hold of me swaying lightly back and forth. We must have looked silly standing there huddled up together on the sidewalk. _

"_Oh, and one other thing." I said. "She hasn't had dinner yet, so I should probably get back there and get her something to eat, you can come if you want." _

_As soon as I said that we both burst out laughing. I pulled away from the hug but he kept his arm around my waist as we hurried back to the studio. __As soon as we arrived Lillian ran over to me pulling my hand towards the group of men that were watching her._

"_Mummy, this is Uncle Georgie and Uncle Ritchie" I started laughing _

_"Yea, babe I know". __George stepped forward first gathering me into a hug chuckling. _

"_You look smashing love." He said loud enough for only me to hear. I felt a tapping on my shoulder, it was Ringo._

"_Don't forget about me!" He said with a warm grin on his face._

"_Ritchie, how could I forget about you? You were always my favorite!" The rest of the boys protested as I gave him a peck on the cheek and a hug too. __He held me close for a minute, _

_"Paul took it pretty hard when you left, he really missed you." Ritch said quietly, "Oh and also Lillian's a real stunner, 'as real pretty eyes."_ _I pulled away from the hug, _

_"Thanks Ritch." __I turned back to Lillian, "Are you hungry?" she bobbled her head up and down. I looked over at Paul and he nodded to the boy's, _

_"Sorry lads, you'll 'ave to do without me for a bit". __John reacted in fake horror, _

_"How will we ever make do without the 'cute' one?"_ "_Sod off Lennon." Paul replied good-naturedly. __The three of us walked out into the office where I bundled up Lillian in her coat. She reached out her arms for me to pick her up._

"_Sorry doll, mommy's wearing heels, I can't carry you there." She dropped her shoulders, tipping her head slightly and frowning. Paul watched bemused with the little child. Lillian turned around and looked him up and down while I tried to stifle my giggle. I guess she decided that she was too tired to care who carried her because she reached up her arms towards him._

"_Dad." Was all it took for him to pick her up. I smiled as I watched my daughter laid her head against his chest. He kissed her on the top of her head, and then we both walked outside._

_Paul's P.O.V. _

_Paul watched as Rachael bundled up their daughter and stepped back. Lillian reached up her arms for Rachael to pick her up._

"_Sorry doll, mommy's wearing heels, I can't carry you there." Lillian drooped her shoulders, tipping her head a little and frowning. Paul watched completely enchanted with the little child. Lillian turned around and looked him up and down. She looked tired and lifted up her arms for him to pick her up._

"_Dad." Was all it took for him to fall completely in love with her. That simple three letter word changed his entire life. He picked her up and Lillian laid her head against his chest. Paul kissed her on the top of her head, breathing in slightly. She had a baby-like fragrance, honey and lavender. His heart swelled a little bit, he never thought that he could love someone this much, and to think how much of her life he had already missed killed him a little bit inside. _


	3. Chapter 3

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He led Rachael out the door and the three of them walked to a diner a little farther up the road. When they arrived it was just about nine o'clock. Thankfully there wasn't anyone there except for a couple of old waitresses who could care less that a Beatle was in their presence. They were seated comfortably in the back of the restaurant just in case word got out that Paul was there. By the time they ordered Paul was busy telling Rachael about what they were working on in the studio. _

_Lillian was seated in between them and was having an awfully hard time staying awake. Her head finally landed on the table and she was fast asleep. Paul and Rachael tried to control their amusement and laughter to no avail. They burst out laughing when the waitress came back and noticed their child passed out at the table._

"_Should I make the order to go?" _

"_Yeah, thanks that would be great." Paul managed to say before he and Rachael busted out into another fit of uncontrollable giggles. _

"_How does she manage to sleep sitting like that?" He asked through another fit of giggles._

"_I have no idea, she does it all the time, the kid can sleep anywhere!" She said smiling._

"_She looks like a right-old drunk passed out at the bar "Paul commented, this really got them and soon they were 'shooshing' each other in order not to disturb the child._

_The waitress came back and they thanked her while Paul paid the bill. He carried out Lillian while Rachael got the food. He couldn't believe how well they all were getting along. But this all changed in an instant when a group of photographers jumped out at them as they exited the building. The cameras kept flashing and he shot a look at Rachael who at the moment looked mortified. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_The cameras kept flashing at Paul, who was currently holding Lillian and nuzzling her head into his neck so the cameras wouldn't see her face, and more importantly wake the sleeping kid up. They kept shouting out questions at him._

"_PAUL, PAUL, WHOS THAT KID?", "HEY IS THAT RACHAEL BELTER?", "PAUL IS THAT YOUR CHILD?", "PAUL WHAT'S HER NAME?"_

_Questions came flying out from every direction. I was absolutely terrified; I didn't want my daughters face on the cover of every magazine. Thankfully her face was hidden though cuddled right up in Paul's neck. He stopped for a moment for me to catch up to him, and slipped an arm around me to shield from the growing crowd of paparazzi. This was complete madness. Paul was becoming notably irritated._

"_Move along mates, nothing to see here, just went out for a bite to eat." We managed to push through the mob and we found ourselves not even a block from the studio. We rushed along until we made it to the doors quickly running in and stopping for a breath. Everyone who was in the studio came in to see what the commotion was all about._

"_What the hell is going on?" John questioned us as we caught our breaths. Paul was lightly bouncing Lillian and rocking, any motion that would soothe her she was a bit crabby about being awoken from her slumber._

"_It's the bloody photographers, they're everywhere." Paul spit out in disgust._

"_I'll call a car for you" The studio manager said hastily, Paul nodded in thanks. __I peered out the windows watching the mob grow even bigger, it was so late out. Didn't these people have anything better to do? John, George, and Ringo were standing beside me watching out the windows too. Paul was behind us, he had managed to get Lillian back to sleep but he was still bouncing her singing quietly to calm her. _

_Lillian's P.O.V_

_Her eyes hurt as she woke up lights were flashing and people were yelling all around her. How had she gotten here? She tucked her head back into her daddy's neck, he was running, still carrying her and mummy was running along beside them. What was going on? Daddy and mum stopped running when they reached the studio where mum worked. They were standing in the entrance room and the adults were talking quietly. Daddy started to rock her and sing quietly in her ear, he really did have a nice voice. _

_Her eyes felt heavy again and she promptly fell asleep. __When she woke up again she felt shoving. She was still in dad's arms but people were shouting again, and those lights were clicking. She was terrified, and she started to cry. It was a short time before it was quiet again and they were in the car. Lillian was still cuddled up to dad and she stopped crying to listen to him sing to her. She fell asleep again, this time completely wiped out._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I scooted into the car with Paul and Lillian following suit. _

"_Drive to the other end of the city and back, I don't want them following us." Pail instructed the driver. The driver nodded and swiftly sped the car down the road to get away from the multitude of people. I heard Paul quietly singing to Lillian who was sniffling, the poor girl was terrified of the mob of people, she had no idea what was going on but I kept looking out at all the people chasing our car. This was entirely insane, what had I gotten Lillian and I into? I had given up this life years ago, I didn't want this life for my daughter. After a few blocks or so Lillian must have fallen back asleep. I was still staring out the window, extremely stunned. I felt a hand reach out for my shoulder I turned around, it was a remorseful Paul. _

"_I'm really sorry about that." He apologized softly._

"_Don't be, it's really not your fault, neither of us could have know that was going to happen." __He relaxed a bit when I said that, I leaned back a bit to get a look at Lillian who was snuggled up to him._

"_How did you get her to sleep so quickly?" I asked thoroughly amazed._ _He shrugged a bit and grinned, _

_"Practice, lots of cousins and babies being passed around when I was younger I guess."_ _I continued watching him and Lillian; he really was a great dad already. We finally had the car turned around and we were heading back towards my flat. When we arrived there were no photographers in sight. We headed inside and up to the flat. When we arrived I put the food down on the counter and started pulling it out. Tessa had left a note stating that the renovators had finished; also that she and William went back to their flat and that she would call tomorrow. Paul found his way to the living room and laid Lily down on the couch. On his way back to the kitchen I saw him looking at the photographs on the wall._

"_When is this one from?" he asked pointing at the picture of Lillian and I on the beach._

"_Oh actually that one's new, it was taken a month ago we went down to the Bahamas." Paul nodded continuing down the wall stopping at another picture where he started to laugh, _

_"What about this one?" The picture he was pointing at contained a naked toddler Lillian chugging a bottle of soda. I started to laugh, _

_"She was 3 in that picture, never really cared for clothes all that much", Paul continued looking at them while I set out plates and dished out some food. I also got out a picture album filled with baby pictures of Lillian. He was excited about this in particular, he barely touched his food as he looked through the pictures grinning proudly at some and laughing wildly at others. __I heard the door click open and I turned around, it was Phillip. __I could hear him grumbling from the hallway kicking off his shoes,_

"_There was a mob down the street; I guess some bloody Beatle was eating at the restaurant. Fucking annoying those long-hair's are. Took me half the hour to get the damn car down the road."_ _He was in a foul mood. I could hear him stomp in the kitchen obviously a little taken aback that there was a visitor over. He pecked me roughly on the cheek, it stung a bit._

"_Who's this?" He said eyeing Paul down. Paul stood up and turned around,_

"_Paul McCartney" He said standing up to his full high looking slightly down at Phillip while extending his hand. If Phillip was surprised by the identity of our visitor, he didn't show it at all._

"_Phillip Dockery" he said shaking his hand roughly. The two men were staring each other down._

"_What's he doing here?" Phillip nearly spat, while shooting me a look. _

"_Uhm, well Phillip this is Lillian's father." I stated quietly. Phillip nodded a minute, he seemed to be processing the thought. _

"_Paul, chum, do you mind giving us a minute?" Phillip asked with an awful sneer on his face. Paul looked over at me and I nodded a bit trying to avoid his eyes._

"_Do you mind waking up Lily and bringing her to bed?" I asked._

"_No problem love" He said while turning out of the kitchen. Phillip waited a full minute before turning in on me._

"_When were you going to tell me?" Phillip asked stepping close to me. My nose wrinkled a bit, I could smell a tiny bit of alcohol wafting off of him. I crossed my arms shrugging while staring straight at him. Phillip looked a bit put off._

"_Whatever", he said rolling his eyes "I'm going to bed." He stalked out of the kitchen and I heard the bedroom door slam. I let out the breath I was holding in. That was a close one. There were only a few occasions where Phillip had come in angry and this happened to be one of them. These rare instances were becoming more common lately. Last week he had walked in drunk without even talking to me, he left for a few days after that and when he came home he had acted like nothing had even happened. Whatever, I rolled my eyes, there was probably just something going on at work. I sat back down at the table continuing to eat and skim through the photos. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He turned around and walked out of the kitchen to go and wake up Lily. That Phillip guy was a real dick. He decided that confronting him was not the way to go, besides it wasn't like Phillip was a serious boyfriend of Rachael, or was he? Never mind, it really wasn't any of his business. No matter the pang of jealousy he felt when he kissed Rachael on the cheek, he quickly shook those thoughts out of his head. He didn't need to be thinking about having a girl right now, after all Jane had just left him, it was a little too soon to be all over another bird. He stopped in front of the fancy black couch he had laid Lillian on, and kneeled down lightly shaking his baby's shoulder. _

"_Come 'ead love wakeup, your mum wants you to go to bed." He said softly. Lillian rolled over with a pout on her face. She was a bit irritated from being woken up so many times in one night. So she started to fuss a bit. _

"_Shhhh love, no need to be upset." He picked her up and walked into the room he assumed was her bedroom, it was. He set her down steadying her a bit. She was a bit wobbly from being so tired. He stifled a laugh as she wobbled her way over to the pajamas that were laid out on her bed, along the way she dropped all her clothes obviously not caring who saw her. No stage fright at all, this was definitely his kid. She threw on her pajamas and crawled up on her bed snuggling under the cover. Paul walked over to tuck her in, and give her a kiss. Lillian sat up and pointed at the chair across the room. Atop the chair was a stuffed sheepdog animal._

"_Puppy sleeps with me." She mumbled with her eyes half closed. Paul went across the room to retrieve the toy. _

"_What's his name? He asked_

"_Warren McGee." Paul raised one of his eye brows, _

_"Warren McGee?" He questioned._

"_Yeah, I named him after the man who fixed the toilet." She answered completely deadpan. Paul tried to contain his laughter._

"_I have a real puppy like that at home, her name's Martha." He told her, Lillian's eyes shot open, _

_"Really?" she asked completely amazed. _

"_Yes, you can meet her soon if you'd like?" he asked her, _

_"Yeah! That'd be gear!" She said excitedly._ _Paul started to laugh, 'gear'? This kid was hilarious._

"_Alright love, I'm going t' go soon, but I'd like to see you tomorrow. Is that alright?" Lillian nodded and pointed at her cheek for another goodnight kiss. Paul complied and turned off the lamplight before quietly sneaking out the bedroom door. __He hadn't heard anything from the kitchen in a while; he guessed it was safe to go in._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Paul pulled his chair back to the table I noticed him studying me but I didn't look up._

"_I met Warren." He said. I looked up at him and saw him trying to contain a smile. A flash of embarrassment shot through me,_

"_She named him after the plumber, she was fascinated by him."_ _Paul chuckled lightly when he saw me blush, and then things got quiet, he had his head resting on his palm and he was still looking at me_

"_So, Phillip seems like a nice bloke." _

"_Yeah, he's alright." I shrugged. Paul sensed that I didn't want to talk about it. _

"_Can I see you and Lily tomorrow?" _

"_Yeah, I think she'd like that. What time?"_

"_I dunno, maybe a bit later, I've got some stuff at the studio that needs to be done. We could try to do dinner again?" He asked._ _Before I could answer him the phone started to ring, Paul reached behind himself to grab the phone, and handed it to me. Who could be calling at this hour?_

"_Hello?" I answered._

"_Rachael, it's Kelley, sorry it's so late, I'm glad you're up still. How are you doll?" I was a little surprised but a huge grin spread across my face, it was my older sister. I hadn't seen her in a while, she split most of her time in between America and England for work. _

"_Hey Kelley, I'm good what's going on?" In the background I could hear people talking._

"_Actually I just landed I'm at Heathrow. Daniel and I have a huge favor to ask of you." Daniel was her husband, they had gotten married a few years ago. As far as I could tell they were a great pair, always attentive of each other; never a cross word between them. They had just had their first daughter, Holly, in early February._

"_Yeah, sure anything." Paul was still watching me talk on the phone._

"_I know this is kind of really short notice, but if you're not terribly busy would you mind watching Holly until Sunday? Our babysitter had an emergency and couldn't make the trip." _

"_Of course I don't mind! When will you be here?" I wouldn't mind having a baby around the house for the weekend._

"_About half an hour, Thanks so much Rach!" Kelley clicked off and I put back the phone in the cradle. _

"_Who was that?" Paul asked._

"_My sister, so I'll see you tomorrow then?"_

"_Okay, see you then." He gave me a peck on the cheek and grabbed his coat and headed towards the door. I let him out, watching him walk towards the elevator._

"_Oh and Rach, one more thing" He said turning his head, "You look really good." He gave me a wink and I blushed again, who does he think he is? _

"_You're pretty cute yourself Paul." I cut right back. He gave me one more cheeky smile before the doors of the elevator closed. _


	4. Chapter 4

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I hurried back inside the flat putting away dinner, and tidying things up. I called down to the doorman to bring up Lillian's old crib from storage for Holly to use. After a bit the maintenance man came to assemble the crib, I motioned him to the guest room to set it up, he finished quickly and left._ _As promised a half an hour later, Kelley arrived with Holly in tow. I opened the door for her and Daniel and took Holly's small suitcase to her appointed room. Kelley followed, laying a sleeping Holly down in the crib. We both went back out to the living room where Daniel was ready to go._

"_Everything she needs is in the suitcase, thanks so much!" Kelley said with a final hug._

"_No problem at all." I said, and led them back to the door._

"_Oh, I almost forgot!" Kelley exclaimed reaching into her purse and pulling out a small bottle of medicine, _

_"Holly has a bit of a cough. The doctor said it was nothing serious, but she needs to take this in the morning." __I nodded taking the bag from her hand and placing it on the counter. Final farewells were exchanged and the couple left._ _It was pretty late out by now, so I checked on Lillian and Holly a final time before going to bed. I fell into a peaceful sleep feeling better than I had in ages_

_I was woken up by Holly's crying. Phillip rolled over clearly annoyed, _

_"Make it quiet down."_

"_It's not an 'it' Phillip, it's a baby." I answered back shortly, I wasn't too happy with him. Especially after that little 'episode' with Paul. I threw on a short, black, silk robe and walked over to Holly's room. I leaned over the bar of her crib to have a look at her. I checked her diaper, that wasn't it. She must be hungry I thought. I picked her up and tried to calm her down, after a minute or so she hiccupped a few times and stopped crying. We went to the kitchen to make a bottle, and then I took her down to the living room to feed her on the couch. She didn't take to the bottle, she wasn't hungry at all and she kept fussing. I put her back up on my shoulder and felt her forehead, it was a little warm; probably just from the crying. I rocked her a bit and took her back to her bed. Holly fell back into a fitful sleep, I watched her for a few minutes more; there was probably nothing wrong, she was just sleepy. I left the room to go check on Lillian, I peeked into her room. Lillian was sitting up in her bed rubbing her eyes._

"_Lily, what are you doing up?" Lillian looked up at me squinting her pretty brown eyes._

"_Did you have a baby?" She asked wildly confused. I tried to contain my amusement._

"_No doll, Holly is sleeping over. Auntie Kelley dropped her off after you fell asleep."_

"_Mmmk" She mumbled flopping back into her bed. I walked back to my bedroom and crawled back into bed, it was only 4:30, I still had a few hours to sleep. __The next time I awoke, I had Lillian standing atop my bed, and shaking my shoulder. _

"_Mummy, Holly is crying". I glanced over to the other side of the bed, Phillip had already left for work thankfully, he hated when Lillian crawled into the bed. I got up and carried Lily to the couch while quickly turning on the T.V. to keep her occupied. Then I rushed into Holly's room,_

"_What's the matter?" I cooed to Holly picking her up, I changed her diaper and got her bottle from the kitchen to feed her, this time she drank a bit, but after a minute or so she struggled away and refused to eat anymore. I checked her temperature again, she still wasn't too warm. I remembered the cough medicine and fed her a spoon full, her face wrinkled up at the taste, but she finished the dose. I carried Holly to the living room and spread out a blanket for her on the floor next to the couch where Lillian was watching cartoons. _

"_Lil, can you watch her while I go get ready?" Lillian nodded her eyes still fixated on the T.V. screen. I headed back to my room, got dressed and did hair and makeup. It only took me 15 minutes; I went over to Lillian's room and grabbed a dress for her. I took it back out to the living room and helped her get dressed; I grabbed a hair brush and started to brush her hair. I braided the font of her hair and tied it on the side with a bow. When I was finished I went to the kitchen and made Lillian some cereal and brought it out to her, Holly was still content on her blanket when the phone started to ring._

"_Hello?"_ "_Hey Rach." It was Tessa. I smiled into the receiver._

"_Hey Tessa, how's the flat?"_

"_It's good, they did a really great job, are you busy right now?" She asked._

"_No, we're not, come on up; bring Will." _

"_Be right up." She clicked off and put the phone back on the receiver. __I heard the door click open and Tessa walked in with William, _

_"Hey Tessy, hey Will, Lily's in the living room. Mind you there's a baby on the floor, yeah?" William nodded and ran to the living room to go see Lily._

"_A baby?" Tessa asked coming over for a hug._

"_Kelley's in town, she needed someone to watch Holly, her babysitter had an emergency."_

"_Oh I see." Tessa said letting go of the hold she had on me. She walked over to the fridge and got out some supplies, "Hope you don't mind, William hasn't had brekky yet". Tessa said while flashing a cheeky smile at me._

"_Go for it." After all she knew where all the kitchen equipment was, she was the one who organized it._

"_I've got some news." Tessa looked up at me from her mixing bowl, _

_"Well, out with it, you look pretty serious."_

"_Paul met Lillian yesterday." Tessa's face turned a bit pale, _

_"How?" I went on to tell her the story and what had happened. She was silent for a few moments after I told her, _

_"Do you think it's a good idea?" She asked._

"_What do you mean?_"

"_Well, you know Rach, he hasn't exactly been around, and you know how he is. What about Phillip? Does Paul even know about you two?" I knew what she meant about 'how Paul was'._

"_I guess it's only fair that he knows he has a kid, and it really wasn't his fault he wasn't around, only you and I knew."_

"_What about Phillip Rach? Don't avoid it." I tried to evade her eyes that were staring right through me._

"_They met. I don't think Paul knows were actually 'together' though." Tessa nodded but kept silent continuing to listen to me. She knew if she stopped talking, I would keep going. _

"_I don't think I love him, he comes home angry, and we don't even talk anymore." I admitted quietly. I felt the tears coming, but quickly wiped them away. _

_"I found her clothes here too.." I looked up at Tessa. I hadn't told anyone about that._

_" Last week I walked in before Phillip had woken up and found women's clothes behind the bathroom door, they certainly were not mine, and definitely not Lillian's." I saw her gasp a little, _

_"I didn't believe it myself, I still don't want to believe it." Tessa reached out for me and I went to give her a hug, she took a paper towel and handed it to me _

_"Blow" She ordered. I momentarily forgot my sadness and started laughing, I felt like I was 5 again. _

_"Thanks mom" I replied sarcastically. _

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_She scooted down from the couch and sat next to Holly's blankey. She heard someone entering the room, and she turned around quickly, it was her best friend William!_

"_Hi, Lily" He said, he sat down next to her and threw an arm around her shoulder._

"_Hi Willy. That's Holly." She said pointing at the baby lying next to them on the blanket. William glanced over at Holly scanning her and furrowing his light-blonde eyebrows. _

"_Is that your mum's baby?" _

"_No silly, she's my cousin." She told him matter-of-factly. He gave her a goofy grin and turned his attention back towards the screen. The Beatles cartoon was on. William kept looking between the screen and her face. She wondered what was the matter,_

"_Will, why do you keep giving me silly looks?" William continued doing this for a second more,_

"_Lily, you look a lot like him." He said pointing his stubby little fingers at the screen. There on the television was a cartoon Paul McCartney. Lillian tilted her head to the side watching the screen. William tried to prove his point,_

"_Here, come here." He said standing up and dragging her up as well. He took her by the wrist to the mirror that was hanging on the opposite wall far above both of their heads. _

"_Gimme a second." William said dragging small wooden chest up under the mirror. He got down on his hands and knees before the chest to act as a stepping stool for Lil._

"_Go ahead." He ordered, Lily shrugged and crawled onto his back and then stepped up on top of the chest. She pulled up William behind her and the pair looked up into the mirror._ "_See." He said, "Look, your eyes and your nose match." She watched herself in the mirror. He did have a point. She shrugged, _

_"He kind of looks like my daddy." William looked impressed,_ "_You met your dad?" She nodded, "At mum's work, yesterday." William looked a bit down, Lily knew that Will never met his dad,_

"_Maybe since you don't know your daddy, we could share mine." William looked up with pleading eyes, _

_"Do you really mean that Lily?" _"_Of course Willy, you're probably my bestest friend, we could share a dad." William grabbed Lillian into a sloppy little kid hug and gave her a smooch on the cheek._ "_Thanks, you're probably my bestest friend too." William hopped down from the chest holding out a hand for the girl. She latched on and jumped down too. The duo went back to the couch to sit down immediately Lillian froze she recognized the song coming from the T.V._

**'Close your eyes and I'll kiss you**  
**Tomorrow I'll miss you**  
**Remember I'll always be true**  
**And then while I'm away**  
**I'll write home every day**  
**And I'll send all my loving to you**

**I'll pretend that I'm kissing**  
**The lips I am missing**  
**And hope that my dreams will come true**  
**And then while I'm away**  
**I'll write home every day**  
**And I'll send all my loving to you'**

'Whoa' she thought, that was the song daddy had sung to her yesterday after those people chased them into the car. Of course daddy had sung it slower and quieter, but still he sounded exactly like the people on T.V. Maybe he watched these cartoons too.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_Tessa and William left around 3:30, Holly was sitting on my lap and Lillian was grabbing her coat. The three of us were getting ready for a trip to the park before Paul came to get us for dinner. I called down to the front desk and asked the doorman, Alfred. _

"'_Lo?" A thick Irish accent came to my ear._

"_Hey Alf, do you mind terribly to grab Lillian's old pram from the storage room?"_

"_I'll go get it right away ma'am." _

"_Thanks Alf!" I clicked off the phone and packed up the baby,_

"_Lil, ready to go?" She bolted out of her room towards the door wiggling with anticipation, she loved the park. I grabbed my purse and hoisted Holly on my shoulder and we set down towards the Lobby._ _Alfie was waiting with the pram when we arrived, I put Holly in and thanked him,_

"_No problem miss, where are you lot headed?"_

"_Just to the park, I hope the rain will hold off." The sky had become a bit darker over the past hour, looked like nothing to be worried about though._

"_A word of warning to you- there's a protest not too far from there; steer clear of it, yeah?" _

"_Thanks Alf." I replied. The three of us left the building without a hitch, it was a bit odd though, usually there weren't people around outside during this time of day, I noticed a few men in coats' glance at us as we left the building. That's strange, whatever; it really wasn't any of my business why they were there. Lillian held onto the pram as we walked down the street, I stopped at a newsstand to grab something to read. I wasn't really looking for anything in particular until Lillian pointed at a certain magazine,_

"_Mummy, that's you and daddy!" I looked over to see what she was pointing at. Oh. My. God. I felt my stomach sink. On the cover of the glossy magazine was a photo from the previous night. You could see Paul, who was holding Lillian, and I surrounded by a group of photographers. I snatched it up and quickly paid for it. _

"_Let's go" I told Lillian as I reached into my purse and slid on my sunglasses. Eventually we made it to the park and Lil ran free. I pulled Holly's pram to the side of the bench I was. I pulled out the magazine and cringed a bit **'MACCA'S LITTLE GIRL'** blared out the title. I continued to read on,_

_**Paul McCartney caught leaving a restaurant with former model Rachael Belter, the pair was spotted in St. John's Wood, near Paul's and presumably Miss Belter's home, but the question on everyone's mind is- who was the child Paul was holding? Both parties declined to comment on the identity of the child**._

_I scoffed, 'declined to comment'? More like scared out of their wits, but I continued to read on,_

**_A car picked the couple up at Abbey Road Studios; the same car was later spotted outside of the luxury apartment complex on Hamilton Avenue. Insiders say Rachael is currently residing-_ **

_Holly started coughing horribly, I stood up picking her up out of the pram. I felt her forehead, it was very hot. Crap, I had to get her home immediately. _

"_Lillian, we have to go!" I called for my daughter. She noticed the urgency in my voice and she came to the side of the pram,_

"_What's wrong with Holly?" She asked._

"_She's not feeling well, we have to go home." Holly was still coughing, it sounded like loud screeches now. We hurried back through the park and were just about to cross the street, an enormous crowd was blocking the street, fuck, this must have been the protest Alf was talking about. Luckily I managed to find another way to the apartments, but the site I saw completely took me by surprise. __The entrance way to the building was completely blocked, people were pouring out of the lobby, what the hell was going on? I grabbed Lily's hand and silently assessed the crowd. All of the sudden the sky broke open and it started to pour. _

"_Do not let go of my hand, understand?" I ordered Lillian. She looked frightened but latched onto my hand. We crossed the crowded street and immediately chaos broke loose. People out of all directions started screaming, _

"_THERE SHE IS", "WHERE'S PAUL?", "RACHAEL, RACHAEL!", "OVER HERE!"_

_People were grabbing at us from all directions as we entered the lobby; we only made it a few feet in the door when Alf spotted us. He pushed his way through the unruly crowd and picked Lillian up. _

"_ELEVATOR'S, NOW." He yelled over the blare of the mob. He raced through with Lillian as I rammed people with the stroller, we were all in and Alf was shoving people out of the elevator, it only took us a second to reach our floor, I didn't have a chance to ask Alf anything. Reporters packed the hallway leading to our door, how in the world did they get up here? Alf was still holding Lillian as I managed to open the door despite the deafening noise, flashing cameras and prodding hands. I pushed the stroller in and Alf handed Lillian to me as he held people back. _

_"LOCK IT AFTER I LEAVE", he ordered. He threw his body out the door pulling people out with him. I slammed the door behind him and bolted it closed. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul left the studio accompanied by a rather large body guard named Buddy. He usually never needed one unless he was on tour but he had heard about the protests and he wasn't about to take a chance. He smiled, he was a bit excited, and he was on his way to see his daughter whom he had just met yesterday. Buddy pulled the car around and he climbed in. The drove to Rachael's flat, he was shocked by the huge crowd outside the apartment building, what the hell was going on? He had to get in there._

"_We've got to get in there, NOW." He told Buddy._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I turned around to deal with a horrified, screaming Lillian, and an extremely sick baby. Lillian was presently soaked through her clothes and was holding her head, someone must have gotten hold of her hair. Holly was wheezing now, it was apparent she was having a massive amount of trouble breathing. People were throwing themselves at the door and I was almost sure it was going to bust. I quickly grabbed Holly out of the stroller and stripped off her wet clothes, Lillian followed suit and dropped her sopping wet clothing on the floor as well, she was still screaming bloody murder, but right now I had to do something about Holly's condition. I ran into the bathroom and turned on the hot water in the shower waiting until the steam was billowing out. I remembered when Lily was little and she had trouble breathing the hot steam helped her out. The bathroom door was still open as I bounced Holly and I called to Lillian,_

"_It's okay baby" I said trying to soothe both of them. All of the sudden the door broke open and Paul and a rather large man can tumbling in._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Hordes of people were packed in the hallway, Buddy managed to break through Rachael's door and the pair tumbled through the doorway. He stood back up as Buddy held the door back. His attention immediately focused on Lillian standing in the middle of the hallway screaming in terror, with absolutely no clothes on. He ran to her and scooped her up, steam was flowing out of the bathroom, what the fuck had happened here?_

"_RACHAEL!" He shouted into the apartment, he had a fierce hold on Lillian,_

"_IM IN HERE!" She screamed back. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I was still bouncing Holly when Paul sprinted into the bathroom holding Lillian._ _He slammed the door behind him blocking out most of the noise. He caught his breath, and tried to stop Lily's shrieks._

"_You're fine, you're okay, daddy's here now honey. Shhhh, please stop crying, mommy's here, daddy's here, it's going to be alright." He kept trying to reassure her. After a few minutes her sobs turned into whimpers. He was still rocking her and leaning up against door adjacent to where I was currently stationed with a still coughing Holly. The coughs were only becoming worse and more frequent. _

"_Who's the baby, and what's wrong?" He addressed me with a frightened look on his face. I couldn't have looked much better; the baby's hacking was only getting worse. _

"_This is Holly, my sister's kid. I think she has croup or something and it's getting worse. If you also haven't fucking noticed the whole world decided to pack into the fucking building and are trying to kick down the door." Paul nodded obviously not fazed by my brash use of language._

"_The guard is taking care of the crowd, we have to stay here for a bit but we've got to get out of here as soon as it cools down a bit."_

"_Really Paul? You fucking think we should get out of here? IF YOU HAVENT NOTICED THE BUILDING'S PACKED, LILLIANS TERRIFIED, THE BABY'S SICK, AND THERE ARE PEOPLE ATTACKING THE DOORS AND WINDOWS." I shouted in response, "THE SHIT HAS HIT THE GOD-DAMNED FAN. WE'RE ABSOLUTELY SCREWED!"_

"_CALM DOWN," he retorted, "IM GOING TO GET YOU OUT OF HERE JUST GIVE ME A BLOODY MINUTE."_ _We both took a minute to comfort the child in our arms. Buddy knocked on the door,_

"_We're going to have to leave in a minute"_

"_Okay", replied Paul who took control of the situation, _

_"Hand me the baby, and go get changed. Be quick about it." We traded kids and I ran with Lillian to her room and quickly threw an outfit on her. I grabbed a blanket, wrapping her up in it and handed her her stuffed sheepdog, Warren. She was still crying but I picked her back up grabbing another blanket for Holly. I turned back into the bathroom giving Paul the blanket, he skillfully swaddled Holly up and held her tight,_

"_Ready?" Buddy checked for the final time, we looked at each other and nodded, we had to get out of here in a hurry. He supplied us with last minute instructions, _

_"Do not under any circumstances let go of either of the kids, keep your heads down and take the back staircase. Your only goal is to get to the car safely." Buddy locked eyes with Paul, I knew instantly what that look meant. This was worse than any situation either of them had been involved in before, especially since little kids were involved._

"_I'm going out first, run as fast as you can." Buddy commanded. He swung open the door, it was like opening the gates of hell. Reporters slammed into us and we managed to fly down the staircase. Paul backed me up and helped Lillian and I along. Alf met us in the lobby and held out his arms in effort to push people back, it helped immensely. I jumped into the car still squeezing Lily, and Paul got in with his arms protecting Holly. Buddy got in the driver's seat and locked all the doors. People were rocking the car, we were in the middle of a riot. Out of nowhere a crack of a gunshot rang through the air,_

"_Get down." Buddy called back to us. I pulled myself to the floor with Lillian. Paul put Holly on the floor and threw his body over her to block her. Buddy slammed on the gas and the car started going. Paul grabbed my hand and held it tightly. It took us half an hour to make it through the worst of the riot. A few more gunshots rang out, this was insane! I was stricken with absolute fear. We were all below the window level, and some madman had a gun. __We arrived at Paul's house on Cavendish Avenue, police were stationed outside holding the ever-growing mob back. We were safely inside the gates when Buddy pulled the doors open for us to exit. Paul threw an arm around all of us trying to keep us all as close together as possible we got inside the house falling completely exhausted on the floor. Everyone at once completely broke down. Lillian was shrieking, Holly was shrieking as well but a ragged cough shuddered through her body every few seconds, I started crying hysterically and Paul was in shock. His face completely slack and mouth slightly ajar. He was snow white and his eyes were dead. _


	5. Chapter 5

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul surveyed the room- Currently he had a sick baby in his arms, his daughter was shrieking bloody murder while being held by her panic-stricken mother, this was not good. As for himself, he couldn't say he wasn't surprised about this whole mess, because he was. Paul turned around, right now Buddy was monitoring police officers coming in and out of the property from the front door._ _He quickly addressed Buddy,_

_ "The baby needs a hospital, or- or I don't know just something, she's burning up." Buddy called a police officer dictating the message Paul had ordered. The police man strode over to get a look at the baby, _

_"We have a medic on staff, Mr. McCartney." He offered, Paul watched while the officer called over another man who was similarly dressed. He reached his arms out for the baby and Paul placed Holly in his arms. The medic took Holly over to the living room and placed her on the couch. Paul followed close behind monitoring his every move, there was no way he was going to let anything happen to this kid. The medic pulled out equipment from his bag and started assessing the child,_

"_Just as I suspected croup and a slight fever." Paul nodded, it didn't sound too bad. The medic looked back up at Paul, _

_"I don't think we have a chance of getting her to the hospital in that crowd, but I think some steam would help."_

"_Buddy, can you handle that?" Paul turned to the bodyguard._

"_No problem, come 'ere lass." Buddy scooped up the baby and went up to the second floor bathroom. Paul could hear him turning on the shower, he had one situation taken care of, not a bad start. _

_"Where's my dog?" He asked the officer._

"_She's outside patrolling the backyard with the other officers; we're hoping the threat of a dog will deter some of the trouble makers." _

_Paul scoffed threat of a dog? An idiot could see that Martha wouldn't hurt a fly, much less an intruder. At best she would lick them to death. He had one more thing to take care of, he went out to the front room in search of Lillian and Rachael, he spotted them in front of the window. Lillian was not happy._

_Rachael's P.O.V_

_I managed to get myself and Lillian cleaned up. At the moment I was holding her and peering out the front window watching the mob. The police had a pretty secure perimeter of the house, Lillian was still crying and huffing. Paul came over, wordlessly reaching for Lillian. Lil latched onto him,_

"_Where's Holly?" I asked a little worried, _

_"Buddy 'as her. They're trying that steam thing again for her cough. We can go check on her if you'd like?" I nodded in agreement following him up the stairs and into the bathroom._

"_She's doing a lot better." Buddy told us proudly. He handed Holly to me, and left the room to go check on the rest of the household. Buddy was right, Holly wasn't coughing anymore, she had fallen into a content sleep. I turned around and shut off the water. I looked back at Paul and Lillian. Lillian had fallen asleep as well. _

"_Follow me" He whispered quietly. He led me into his bedroom and put Lillian down on the bed, I followed suit with Holly lying her down on the opposite side, Paul came around and positioned pillows around the baby so she wouldn't fall off of the bed. _

"_I should probably call my sister." Paul pointed at the phone on the bedside table, and went back to fussing over the two sleeping little girls. I dialed the number, it rang a few times but no one answered. I tried twice more but to no avail, they were probably just busy. _

"_No answer?" He whispered, I shook my head in response. He pulled himself up on the bed and patted the spot next to him for me to join. I crawled up on the bed and sat Indian style, we watched the girls sleep for a bit,_

"_I'm sorry about what I said… you know back at the apartment." I apologized quietly. He turned towards me but I didn't want to look up, I was going to start crying again if I looked at him. _

_"I really didn't mean it.." The phone started to ring, and Paul answered,_

"_Hello?" He furrowed his eyebrows looking straight at me, _

_"Yeah, put him through, thank-you operator." Paul handed the phone to me, I was confused. _

"_Hello?"_

"_Rachael, it's Phillip." My heart stopped, he sounded really angry._

"_Hi Phil-"He interrupted me, _

_"What the hell went on here? I come home from work, you're gone, there are reporters all around, and the fucking door is ruined, care to explain?"_

"_Actually Phillip, I really don't. I'll come by later to get Lillian's and mine things. The flat is your problem now. We're done." He was silent for a minute._

"_I'll call my lawyer about the flat. Get your shit out within the month." I clicked off quietly putting the phone down. I couldn't believe what I had just said, that was half my house too. Getting our stuff out wasn't the problem- movers could take care of that, the problem was that my daughter and I were homeless now. _

"_Rachael….." Paul was studying me with worried eyes, "I'm really sorry."_

"_No it's fine, We'll just stay at my friend Tessa's until we get a new house." Paul decided not to press the subject, there was a knocking at the door, we turned around just as Buddy peeked his head in,_

"_Rachael there's someone here to see you." Paul and I stood up, an important looking man strode in and shook each of our hands,_

"_Rachael Belter, I presume?" I nodded, he turned to Paul, _

_"And you are-?"_ "_Paul McCartney." He said shaking the man's hand. _"_Ah, that's nice, but I'm afraid I've come bearing bad tidings." My eyes shot over at Paul, he took a step closer to me putting an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close,_

"_What's this about?" Paul said eyeing down the man. The man pulled a piece of paper out of the brown leather briefcase he was holding,_

"_I'm here to inform you that there has been an accident." My mind went blank as he continued,  
"Your friend Tessa has been murdered, and you are named final executer of her affairs." He coughed uncomfortably, _

_"She was shot about an hour ago on Hamilton Avenue in the workers riot." It all clicked in my mind, that's where the gunshots had come from._

_ "It was a mishap; one of the protesters had gotten out of hand and started firing into the crowd. Your friend was with her son at the time of the accident, she was walking out of a store when she was hit." _

"_Where's William?" I said in a rushed manner, _

"_Oh yes, Ms. Walter's son, he is actually with a social worker downstairs-" I immediately pushed past him and flew down the stairs with Paul hot on my tail. I ran into the living room almost bumping into the social worker,_

"_Auntie Rachael" William shrieked and tore away from the woman; I dropped down on my knees as he ran into my arms. He was crying, I started to smooth down his hair as I picked him up, the social worker walked over extending a hand towards me to introduce herself,_

"_Vannessa Richards." I introduced myself likewise Paul did the same as Vannessa explained the situation to us._

"_Ms. Belter you are named guardian of William according to Ms. Walter's Will." I nodded; she and I agreed to this when our kids were born, Tessa would've been the guardian of Lillian in this same situation._

"_I have some papers for you to sign if you would follow me." Vannessa said walking into the kitchen and pointing at legal documents that were spread all over the kitchen table. __Paul and I walked into the kitchen following Vannessa,_

"_These are papers pertaining to the custody of William, if you would like to look these over so we can discuss your options" She said motioning to the seat next to her at the table. Paul tapped me on the shoulder reaching for William, I handed him over locking eyes with Paul, no words were needed, we both were in over our heads._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I sat down at the table with the social worker. She began setting down paper's in front of me, _

"_Now, we have a few options here" Vannessa started, "Williams's father is not present, correct?" _

_"No, no he's not." Vannessa nodded, _

_"Okay, so I'm assuming you are willing to take full care and custody of William?" I nodded again. She wrote some things down on the notepad before her._

"_Alright, if you sign this you will be granted temporary custody of the child"_

"_Temporary?" I said. She looked up from the notepad smiling a bit, _

_"I have to say that, a court date will be set in a few weeks for full custody." Relief ran through me and I was able to breathe again, the last thing William needed was to be bounced around in between homes. I quickly signed the papers and passed them back to Vannessa._

"_Alright, I think that covers it." She said shaking my hand, _

_"Congratulations, you are now the guardian of William Arthur Donavan Walters." I thanked her again and she left the house with one of the officers. I must have been in shock; Tessa's death was the farthest thing from my mind at the moment. All I wanted to do was make sure William and the girls were okay. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul took the little boy from Rachael's arms so she could go talk to the social worker. William wasn't crying anymore, this worried Paul a bit. He sat on the stairs with the child trying to listen in on the conversation between Rachael and Vannessa, he didn't want to be nosy, he just wanted to know what was going to be done with the boy. He looked down at William and cold, uncaring eyes stared back. William seemed to be looking far past him, to a dark place no one should have to see, let alone a child. Paul recognized that emotionless stare, his own mother had died when he was younger as well. It was definitely the worst feeling a person could ever experience. He pulled Williams head under his chin quietly snuggling him, this seemed to comfort William a bit. _

"_Are you Lillian's daddy?" the boy asked._

"_Yeah buddy, what's your name?"_

"_William, the lady in the kitchen brought me here. Mum got hurt… a lot." Paul nodded to the boy and he continued, "My mummy… she died." William finally admitted. Paul felt the child's pain. The poor kid looked exhausted. _

"_I'm sorry William, my mum died too." William absorbed this information quietly._

"_Do you think it hurts to die?" William asked softly. Paul thought about it for a minute,_

"_No, I don't think so. You don't hurt anymore when you die, right?" William listened to him. "So maybe sometimes it's better than hurting for a long time." William nodded a little. They were quiet for a while listening to the conversation in the kitchen. After a while it got quiet and they heard the front door shut. Rachael turned the corner and spotted the boys on sitting on the stairs. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I spotted Paul holding William on the stairs. I climbed up to where they were and sat on the step with them. I looked Will over and brushed the hair out of his eyes,_

"_Hey, you're going to stay with me for a while, okay?" He just kept staring forward while nodding. Tears sprang to my eyes, this was all too much for one day. I looked up at Paul, he had a pained expression on his face as well. _

"_Will, are you tired?" Paul asked. The boy nodded we both stood up and took him to Paul's bedroom. Paul laid him down on the bed making sure not to disturb either of the girls. William curled up next to Lillian and closed his eyes. Paul went to the closet and pulled down a blanket from the shelf and spread it over them. I checked on Holly, she seemed alright, she was still sleeping so that was a good sign. __Paul took my hand and led me out of the room gently shutting the door behind him. Buddy appeared at the end of the hallway,  
_

_"I'm glad I found you guy's, the police force has it under control outside." I was relieved,_

"_That means the kids and I can go home, right?" Paul stepped in instantly, _

_"I don't think so, that's not a good idea." I was puzzled, "Buddy you said the crowds were under control right?" Buddy agreed slowly his eyes were shooting between Paul and I._

"_So, then I don't see why-"Paul interrupted me,_

"_No, Rach really come on just stay here. The kids are already asleep, we probably shouldn't move them." He did have a point, three crabby kids would not be fun to deal with. I sighed a bit, _

_"Alright, I guess."_

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He felt relieved when she had agreed to stay. It was late out by now, and he couldn't bear the thought of her and the kids being across town. He wanted to keep everyone together and under the same roof, it was safer that way. Even though the crowds were under control, there was no telling if they would act up again. Buddy was still standing there,_

"_So it's settled you're staying right?" Buddy asked Rachael,_

"_I suppose, but the kids are going to need some things from back home." Buddy located some paper and a pen for her to write a list, she began scribbling things down on the notepad. He watched in amazement, man was she organized, she was even writing detailed instructions on where to find it all. The process only took a few minutes before she was done, she scanned over the paper a final time._

"_The things with a star next to them are in my apartment, things without the star are in Tessa's apartment, the key is in the cabinet next to the fridge. Do you think you can manage?"_ _Buddy took the list from her and stuffed it into his front pocket, _

"_I'll be fine, while I'm gone try not to go outside. There are still a few officers hanging about. If you need anything ask them." Buddy turned and left down the stairs. _

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

_Paul and I waited until Buddy left,_

"_You tired?" He said. I shook my head,_ "_Me either, come on let's find something to do." _

_We ambled down the stairs and entered the kitchen. Paul put on tea as I started exploring. I was actually surprised, the house was nicely furnished. A few pieces of art here and there, everything matched, a stranger walking in certainly wouldn't suspect this was a bachelor pad. I truly liked the style, it was comfortable. I switched on the T.V. and sat down on the couch. Paul walked in with the 2 cups of tea. He placed them on the coffee table and took a seat next to me,_

"_Anything good on?" he asked,_ _I shrugged my shoulders. I really wasn't paying attention. We were both silent for a while, I couldn't focus on the show at all. _

_My head was spinning- I had a daughter, a newly adopted son, and a niece to take care of. I couldn't get a hold of Holly's parents- and I was tremendously worried, what if something happened to them as well? Three kids would put me over the edge of lunacy. Not to mention the new-fangled media attention and the wild stories being thrown about. What about my house? I couldn't go back there, I already told Phillip he could have it. I was homeless with two kids and a temporary niece, well on second thought we could move into Tessa's flat. It was almost an exact replica of mine. That would give William time to adjust to the new situation. I had almost forgotten- what about William? His mother had just died. I couldn't imagine having to deal with that at such a young age. __I felt almost sick, too many thoughts going through my mind. My head was about to explode._

"_What are you thinking about?" Paul broke me away from my momentary insanity. He was looking me over with his deep brown eyes,_

"_Lots of stuff." I whispered calmly. I had to keep under control, I was not going to snap under all this pressure. He looked upset for a split second,_

"_Rachael, honey…" It seemed as though he was searching for the right words, "Whatever it is just tell me, please." _

"_Really it's nothing." I was lying through my teeth, he kept on staring at me,_

"_Rachael, that's not the truth and you know it. Just tell me what's the matter and I'll help you fix it."_ _His emotions were evident on his face, deep-etched lines of worry were spread across his forehead; I couldn't look at him anymore. I turned away folding my arms while trying to keep my feelings inside. Paul made a grab for my hand I tried to pull away but he kept a firm grip. After a moment I stopped struggling. Fine- if he wanted to hold my hand, he could. I still wasn't going to talk. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul managed to grab her hand before she turned away, she struggled a bit at his grip but after a minute or so she finally gave up trying to pull away. He ran his thumb across her delicate hand, my god, he forgot how much he loved those hands, they were so tiny and neat- almost like a china doll. _

"_Rach, come on. Just talk to me, we can figure it out together." He tried again. It was no use, she refused. He had to go about this a different way,_

"_What if I told you what's worrying me?" Rachael didn't budge,_

"_Alright, well… first off when I walked into your house earlier and saw Lillian crying, that scared me. Holly's coughing scared me too, I was afraid we weren't going to make it out of there alive. I'm worried about William, the poor lad asked me about dying today, you know? I didn't have a clue what to tell him." He was looking off into space now and continued, _

_"Actually, I nearly died when you left me in Hamburg. I thought something terrible had happened to you. I couldn't find you anywhere; no one would give me answers." Rachael started to turn around but he didn't notice; Paul continued _

_"But you know what scares me the most? The thought of you and Lillian leaving. I don't think I could handle that." He stopped quietly. There wasn't more left to say. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I absorbed all he had said, he was still holding my hand- I didn't mind anymore._

"_So please just tell me what's going on in your head sweetheart, what's wrong?" he lifted my chin so he could look me straight in the eyes, _

_"Please?"_ _It took me a minute, I took a deep breath telling him everything that was upsetting me._

"_Okay… well for starters, my friend just died and now I have a son. Holly's parents are nowhere to be found, and she is sick. I have to move all of my stuff out of my house and into Tessa's house so that William will have time to get used to his mother being… dead. Pretty much the entire world was after us today and I don't have any clue what I'm supposed to be doing, or what I am going to do." I managed to get it out all at once. Paul just sat there, taking in what I had to say. Buddy walked in the room with two suitcases full of items for the children,_

"_Hey, I think I've got it all." I stood up and gave him a hug,_

"_Thanks so much." Buddy blushed,_ "_No problem miss. I think I'll be going, it is rather late. A few officers will be watching the house, I'll call in the morning to check in, yeah?" Paul shook his hand,_

"_Thanks Buddy." Buddy waved and left the house. Paul and I each grabbed a suitcase and went up to the bedroom where the children were sleeping. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I walked into the room switching on the lamp next to the bed. Both William and Lillian hid their faces,  
_

_"Mummy turn off the light." Lillian whined, _

"_Just a minute babe, you guys need your jammies on." I pulled out a pair of blue pajamas with a duck on the front for William and tossed it to Paul, and got out a similar pink pair for Lillian. We each took a kid and changed them; it only took us a few minutes to get them tucked back into the bed, until Holly started crying. Paul picked her up and left the room to quiet her down. I stayed giving each child a peck on the cheek before turning out the light. I tiptoed out of the room and slowly shutting the door behind me._

_Lillian's P.O.V. _

_She waited until she heard mummy's footsteps disappear down the hallway,_

"_Willy, are you awake?" she asked the darkness._

"_Yeah, turn on the light." She crawled out from under the covers and switched on the light. William got out as well and sat down Indian style on the bed. _

"_What are you doing here?" She asked her best friend, William was quiet for a moment before answering,_

"_My mum died, so they took me here to stay with you." Lillian was shocked, how could auntie Tessa be dead? She just saw her earlier today._

"_I'm sorry Willy." He nodded and smiled sadly looking down at his hands,_

"_It's all right, your daddy told me that mum doesn't hurt anymore, so I guess it'll be okay. I get to live with you now though." He told her that and started to smile again,_

"_REALLY? WE GET TO LIVE TOGETHER?" She was so excited, living with her bestest friend ever? This was the best day of her life. He nodded with a huge grin on his face. Lillian stood up on the bed pulling William up as well._

"_Willy do you know what this means?"  
_

_"No what?" He had a bewildered expression on his face,_

"_WE GET TO BE LIKE A BROTHER AND SISTER!" She shrieked. Williams eye's shot open,_

"_REALLY?" She nodded so fiercely she was sure that her head was about to pop off her shoulders, William grabbed her hands and the two began hopping furiously around the bed, they couldn't stop giggling, this whole situation was turning out to be amazing. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_After helping a drowsy William into his pajamas, Holly started to cry, he grabbed her and left the room so that the noise wouldn't wake up the other kids more than they already were. He left down the hallway back down to the kitchen,_

"_Shhhh lass, you're fine." He cooed to the infant. He walked around the kitchen a bit bouncing her on his shoulder. He didn't hear Rachael coming up behind him,_

"_You're getting quite good at that." She told him, she was leaning against the doorframe with her arms folded and an amused smile across her face. He beamed in return, he actually was quite proud of himself, all the kids genuinely seemed to be taking a liking to him. He continued bouncing Holly while she watched. Paul then went to the living room laying Holly down on the couch and surrounding her once again with pillows. The phone rang, and he picked it up,_

"_Hello?"_

"_Hey Paul" He recognized the voice, it was Ringo_

"_Hey Ritch, what's up?"  
_

_"Well, I don't mean to alarm ya or anything, but yours and Rachael's faces are plastered all over the evening news." This didn't surprise him one bit, there were enough bloody reporters outside._

"_Yeah, I know. We had a bit of a run in with some reporters."_

"'_Some?' Mate, they're showing videos of your car being attacked, looks like a riot going on around you." _

"_I guess it was kind of bad."_

"_Alright, so Mo and I were talking and we have an idea. Why don't you, Rachael and Lillian come to Greece with us tomorrow? Get away from the media, you know?" Paul thought about it for a moment, that wasn't entirely a bad idea. Getting out of the country to let this whole thing cool down for a while but on the other hand they had Holly and William to take care of,_

"_I don't know Ritch; we kind of have something- err some kids to take care of..."_

"_Kids?"_

"_Well, Rachael's friend died and she is taking care of her son, William, and also Rachael's niece is staying with her, I don't know if it's such a good idea."_

"_Just bring 'em along, the more the merrier." It all sounded so simple, he was definitely considering it._

"_I'll talk to Rachael and call you back."  
_

_"Alright son, be quick about it, so you can call Mal to make the arrangements." He hung up walking back into the kitchen. Rach was sitting at the table looking over the same papers the social worker had left for her earlier._ _He couldn't help but notice how good she was looking right now, her hair was a lovely golden brown and her eyes were dark black, the only thing distinguishing the color from her pupil's was an astonishing amber ring that surrounded it. He couldn't help but get lost in them every time she talked, how in the world did he let her slip away from him all those years ago? He wasn't about to let it happen again- the thumping sound from upstairs tore him away from his thoughts, what was that noise? _

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

_Paul was looking at me with one eyebrow raised, I was hearing it too,_

"_What is that?" I questioned. He shrugged his shoulders and led me up the stairs to the location of the noise. We both stood in front of his bedroom door, each placing an ear on the door trying to listen inside. 'Thump, thump, thump' followed by giggles. Paul placed a finger to his lips motioning me to be quiet, he then took a hold of the door handle-_

"_One, two, THREE" He ran into the bedroom, Both Lillian and William stopped hopping instantly and shrieked in fear. Paul ran over to the bed jumping on top and attacking them in tickles, Lily and Willy started laughing chaotically as they tried to push him away, Paul wouldn't give up until the two were out of breath. I nearly fell to the floor from laughing so hard, Paul heard me and turned around with a wild look in his eyes and a goofy grin splashed across his face. He slowly got off the bed and began to walk towards me with his arms stretched out,_

"_RUN!" William and Lillian shouted from the bed, I spun around trying to escape from him, no way I was going to let him catch me I was extremely ticklish. I got about halfway down the hall until his arms caught me around the waist, I tried struggling out his grip but he had a firm hold me. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder,_

"_JAMES PAUL MCCARTNEY, YOU LET ME DOWN THIS INSTANT." I giggled through my most authoritative voice._

"_Fine" He said and flopping me down on his bed. He got on top of me straddling me down and started tickling me, I could breathe from giggling so hard,_

"_Guys, Help me!" I squeaked, Lillian and William couldn't stop giggling in hysterics watching Paul tickle me to death, he then switched tactics, he took both of my arms and pinned them above my head making it impossible for me to break free. _

_Paul's P.O.V_

_He had her right where he wanted her. Her arms pinned right above her head he looked up at the kids,_

"_Tell your mum to come to Greece with me." He told them, _

_"Or…. OR I'LL KISS HER!"_

"_EWWIE!" Was the resounding response from the kids._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_He was leaning into kiss me, Greece? What was this all about?_

"_Come on mummy say you're going to Greece with him!" Lillian shouted._

"_Gree-" He kissed me full on the lips and pulled back up. William was laughing so hard I thought he was going to make himself sick, Lillian tried convincing me again,_

"_Just say it Mum! Or he'll do it again!"_ _Paul leaned back down and I turned my head,_

"_What about Greece?" I asked, he started kissing me on the cheek and found my lips again,_

"_Just say yes!" William laughed, _

_"Then he'll stop!" Paul pulled back from the kiss,_

"_So?" He said raising his eyebrows, he started to lower himself again,_

"_FINE! FINE! I'LL GO!." I shrieked saving trying to save myself from another kiss._

"_Good" Paul said and gave me another kiss before turning to Lillian and William,_

"_Now you two!" He ordered smothering them in kisses,_

"_WE'LL GO!" They screamed. Paul finally sat back, clearly exhausted. __He quickly tucked Lily and Will back into the bed and turned off the light. He grabbed my hand and ran out the door tugging me along with him, this was all happening so fast, why Greece?_


	6. Chapter 6

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Paul dragged me down the hall and into another bedroom, he sat me down on the bed and pulled out a suitcase from the closet,_

"_Alright so you can-"  
_

_"Paul, I'm still confused. Why Greece?"_

"_Ritchie and Mo called, they're going there tomorrow. We're going so we can avoid the media circus outside." He was still pulling things out of the closet._

"_Paul, I'm not going. Neither are the kids." He stopped what he was doing and turned around, he looked confused,_

"_And why not, may I ask?" He was crossing his arms, obviously he was not pleased._

"_Because" I said standing up putting my hands on my hips, _

_"Holly's parents don't know about any of this, and William's mom just died. I can't take him away from his home right now." He still had his arms crossed, and now his face was twisting up in frustration._

"_Don't be difficult Rachael. Just call your sister and ask about Holly also it's going to be better for William not to be around all the reporters and stuff right now." This pissed me off, what right did he think he had bossing me around?_

"_No Paul. I am not going." He stood there; his face was beginning to turn red._

"_Well then I'm taking Lillian with me." Sirens started blaring in my head. My throat began to tighten,_

"_No you're not. She's staying here with me."_

"_No, she's coming-" I couldn't contain myself,_

"_PAUL SHE ISN'T GOING WITH YOU. YOU'VE ONLY KNOWN HER WHAT-? 3 DAYS? WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT TO TAKE HER ANYWHERE?"_

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He was furious, He grabbed her wrist and dragged her down the stairs- he wanted to get far away so the kids wouldn't have to hear them argue, they finally arrived in the basement. He slammed the door behind them,_

"_LET GO OF ME" She shouted ripping her hand out of his grip, "YOU'RE SUCH A FUCKING PRICK." He hadn't anticipated this, just minutes ago he had kissed her, what had gone wrong?_

"_NO WONDER JANE LEFT. IS THIS HOW YOUR MOTHER TAUGHT YOU HOW TO TREAT WOMEN?" That was a low blow. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I didn't regret saying those words at all, I meant it. I could tell he was livid, his hands were clenched in tight fists, and his face a deep crimson._

"_WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?" Paul roared, he took a step towards me, I didn't back down. We were standing nose to nose, _

_"I'M DOING MY BEST." I turned away now, I was enraged. He grabbed my shoulder and spun me back around,_

"_OH NO, NO WALKING AWAY THIS TIME RACHAEL. JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT." I was quiet now. A sudden realization dawned on me, he didn't own me. I didn't have to explain anything to him, I got my anger in check, putting on a blank stare. I tried pushing past him in effort to leave, he blocked my path, _

_"Really mature, Paul. Let me leave. I'm done with this conversation- I'm done with you." He stood firm in his ground._

"_You're not going anywhere. You left last time and look where that got us." I rolled my eyes. This was annoying,_

"_So you're not going to let me leave?" He shook his head,_

"_Not until we figure this out." I huffed in frustration._

"_There is nothing to figure out. I'm waking up the kids, and we are leaving. That's it. Final." _

"_No Rachael, not final. Obviously we're both not happy. We're staying here until you tell me what you want, and how we're going to make this work." Great, this was just great. Now I was trapped in a basement with a stupid Beatle. We were still staring at each other, while trying to catch our breaths. I surveyed the room we were in. It was rather small with a few pieces of furniture consisting of a couch, a table and a lounge chair. It was like a prison. I walked away from Paul and took a seat on the couch staring at the wall, I'd rather not give him the satisfaction of my distress. I saw him out of the corner of my eye just watching me._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_My god, she was impossible. Why couldn't she just let him have control of the situation, he knew what needed to be done, all they needed to do was get away from the press and let this whole state of affairs cool off. A pang of regret was eating away at him, he had definitely lost his temper, he didn't mean to be so rough with her, it was just… she was so infuriating and- and beautiful. He couldn't let her- he wouldn't let her leave him again. _

_He walked over by the couch she was sitting on and sat down on the coffee table directly in front of her. She still had that blank expression on her face, this wasn't going to be easy. He got up again and sat directly next to her, she made a noise of protest but he didn't care. He knew it, they needed each other. There was a twenty minute period of silence, he was surprised. She was unquestionably tough. __He hadn't noticed the tears trailing down her face. She muffled a short sob. His head spun her way, he hated seeing her like this._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_He pulled me up on his lap, I hated being like this. I felt like a ragdoll being pulled and thrown in every direction. His thumbs swiped the tears from my cheeks. I still wouldn't look at him._

"_You're not happy." He said, no shit Sherlock, "Still not going to look at me?" he sighed a moment, _

_"Wait I have an idea" He reached around the both of us, and flicked off the light. _

"_Now you can look at me." I was a bit puzzled at his actions, _

_"Now you won't have to see me but you can talk to me." Smart kid. I still wasn't going to break though._

"_Fine then, I'll start. I apologize for being a dick. I'm sorry for trying to take Lillian away from you. I'm sorry about Tessa. I'm sorry for not being around. I'm sorry you're not happy." He shifted a bit and pulled me closer, _

_"And I'm sorry you hate me." That statement shook me a bit. I didn't hate him, it was just sometimes… I don't know. He was just very controlling. The tears kept falling from my eyes, I couldn't stop them. This was too many tears for one day; you could fill an ocean with all this sadness._ _He pressed his forehead into my cheek, and started to rock a little. He took his hand and began running his fingers through my hair, while the other kept a tight hold on me._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He ran his fingers through her silky hair while holding her tight. This was in effort to keep himself from crying, how could he have made one girl so upset? After a while she started to relax on his lap, which was a good sign. He stopped stroking her hair and reached around for both of her hands. He took them up and started playing with them. He didn't know why he felt the need to keep touching her, he just did._

"_I don't hate you." She uttered weakly, it surprised him when she started to talk. He didn't interrupt though,_

"_I don't blame you for any of that stuff either." That was a small piece of comfort to him, maybe there was a chance._

"_You keep asking me what I want though… but you haven't told me what you want." He thought about it for a minute,_

"_I don't really know. So that makes two of us." They both just sat in silence. It was beginning to get cold in the basement; he felt behind him for a blanket and located one. He stretched out on the couch, and pulled Rachael alongside him. He draped an arm protectively around her waist, and snuffled her head beneath his chin. It was silent for a while again._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I stared out into the darkness,_ "_Maybe we could both get what we want." His fingers were tracing designs on my stomach through the blanket,_

"_How?" I whispered,_

"_Marry me." He said softly._

"_James Paul McCartney, are you completely insane?" He flipped himself so he was lying on his back, then pulled me on top of himself,_

"_No, Rachael Noelle Belter, I am not mad." I started to giggle,_

"_You need to take a nap mister, all this fighting has gone to your head."_

"_Rachael come on I'm absolutely serious. Just think about it, it's perfect. I'm with no one and you're with no one. It's not like we have any prior obligations to anyone." I looked down at him,_

"_So you're saying that just because we're both single at the moment we should go run off and get married?"_

"_If you put it like that it sounds stupid." He said, I could tell he was smiling._

"_That's because it is stupid." He was chuckling,_

"_No it's not. Look we've got a house here. I even have a dog." _

"_You're trying to bribe me with a dog?" I couldn't control the giggles that were flowing out from me, _

"_It worked with Lillian." _

"_Stop teasing Paul, you're acting like a git." _

"_Say you love me!" He started whining, "Say it, you don't think I'm a git!"_

"_Shhhh, come on the kids are sleeping" I said trying to quiet him down,_

"_Say it" He was serious now._

"_You first." I dared,_

"_Fine I, James Paul McCartney, Love you, Rachael Noelle Belter, with all my heart, even though you think I'm a stupid git." I started laughing, _

_"I didn't think you were actually going to say it." _

"_Well I did. Go ahead, your turn." I buried my head in his chest, I was much too embarrassed._

"_Okay, if you can't do it on your own I'll help you. Repeat after me- I Rachael Noelle Belter."_

"_I Rachael Noelle Belter" I said cracking up,_ "_Love you, James Paul McCartney-" I repeated _

_"Love you James Paul McCartney"_

"_Because you are the most attractive man I've ever set my eyes on." _

"_Paul I'm not saying that!" _

"_Say it or I'll kiss you!" I rolled my eyes,_

"_Fine, because you are probably the most attractive man I've ever set my eyes on."_ _He started laughing, _

_"What do you mean probably?" I was giggling too hard to answer him,_

_Rachael's P.O.V_

_We both laid in a contented state for a while, he was running his hands up and down my back,_

"_So?" He questioned,_

"_So what?"_

"_So what about Greece?" I instantly tensed up, he felt it and started rubbing my back in a more relaxing way,_

"_I don't know Paul." The lights were still off and I couldn't see his face,_

"_Rach, just hear me out. If we all go to Greece we can get away from everything, we can call your sister and ask about Holly, Willy and Lillian want to go. Mo and Ritchie are bringing Zak and Jason so you know… it'll be perfect." I thought about it for a moment. Maybe I had overreacted earlier, there was really nothing stopping us from going, I'm sure that the office wouldn't mind my absence, I certainly had a good excuse._

"_I don't know, what time would we leave?" _

"_Uh… soonish" _

"_Soonish?" What the hell did that mean?_

"_Well… you know like at four o'clock", 4:00 a.m.? It was 1:15 right now!_

"_Seriously Paul?" I swatted at him, _

_"That's barely enough time to pack!" He immediately sat up turning on the light,_

"_So we're going?" I let out a groan,_

"_I guess" He pulled me into a bear hug,_

"_Fantastic!" We both stood up,_

"_Okay", he said starting to organize everything,_

_ "First, we'll get Holly taken care of." I climbed up the stairs back into the kitchen, Paul followed. Arrived at the phone and dialed Kelley's hotel number from memory. Paul snaked his arms around my waist and stuck his head next to the receiver in order to listen to the conversation. The front desk put me through to her room, it rang a few times before someone picked up, _

"_Hello?" It was Kelley._

"_Hey Kelley, I've got something to-"_

"_Rachael, I can't really talk right now but I have a huge favor to ask you." She sounded strange, there was definitely something in the wrong,_

"_Yes, anything, what?"_ "_Daniel and I have run into a few erm… issues and were going to be a little longer than we expected. So I was hoping Holly could stay with you for a while?" The events of the night raced through my head- The riot, Tessa's death, Holly's croup. Did Kelley even know what had gone on?_

"_How long?" There was a hesitation on her end,_

"_A month or two." I was stunned, a month or two? _

"_Kelley, what happened?"_

"_I can't talk about it. But can you please?" She was totally stressed._

"_Of course, but I'm going to Greece. Can Holly come along with us?" _

"_Yes, certainly. Alright I've got to dash. Love you Miss you like crazy, Bye!" She ended the call before I could respond. A whole month without Holly, how in the world could she stand that, especially since she was so young? I personally could imagine it myself, there was no way I would leave Lillian that long for anything! Oh well, it wasn't my decision, and I was more than pleased at having Holly around, she was such a great baby and a real cutie._

"_Rachael, what'd she say?" he whispered. Paul must've thought I was still on the phone, after all I was still holding the receiver against my head. I took a second to collect my thoughts. I hung the phone back on the cradle,_

"_She said yes." Paul let out a breath of relief,_

"_Okay, what do you need packed?" He asked._

"_How long will we be gone?"_

"_About 2 weeks." Two weeks? That was much too long!_

"_Paul that's a long time." I was beginning to become cross again,_

"_Rach, come 'ead you promised." He said with a pout on his face. He was right, I did promise._

"_Fine, well I need my stuff and all the kids stuff. But it's all back at the building." He seemed thoughtful for a moment,_

"_How 'bout I call Mal to make the arrangements, then you can help me pack. Then we can go over to your building to get your guy's things." I nodded in agreement,_

"_Good, go pack for me wench." I started to stroll off towards the stairs but not before he slapped me on the rump, my instantaneous response was flicking him off without turning around._ "_Cheeky bastard." I mumbled, he must've heard me because I could hear him howl with laughter as I ascended to the second level._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He watched as Rachael sauntered away, he couldn't keep his eyes off of her amazing figure. She was strikingly gorgeous- there weren't enough words in the universe to illustrate her. His eyes trailed down her curves- he had to stop himself, he quickly dialed Mal and had him set up the trip, and then he dialed Ritchie to tell him that they were all coming along. Ritch seemed more than pleased that they were joining in on the vacation. Paul could tell this was going to be a great trip._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I gently tiptoed into Paul's bedroom trying to be as quiet as possible in effort not to wake up the children. The sight I saw atop his bed made my heart melt. William had his arm lovingly wrapped around Lillian. Her face was buried in his side, it was precious! I had to focus though; we only had a limited time to pack. I snuck into the walk-in closet and flipped on the light. I spotted his suitcase on a shelf way above my head, I tried jumping to take hold of it. Paul came in and started chuckling,_

"_Too high up?" He gave me a cocky smirk._

"_Shuddup, and help me." I watched him easily reach up and retrieve the travel case placing it on the floor he sat next to the suitcase and folded anything I threw at him. I started pulling shirts off the rack for him to give the okay or veto. _

"_So is everything set up?" He nodded while folding a dress shirt,_

"_A car is coming in about an hour to pick us up and bring us to your place to finish packing. Then it's dropping all of us off at the airport, Ritchie 'nd Mo are meeting us there." _

"_And what about the reporters?" I asked tossing him a pair of black swim trunks,_

"_There's only a small group outside, we don't have to deal with them very long. Just until we get to your building. Mal's arranged it so that we can leave out the service entrance and avoid 'em." He looked up at me, "Sound good, mum?" He said sarcastically. I whipped a final pair of flip-flops at him._

"_I suppose, if that's the best you can do" I said openly mocking him, _

_"What about Martha?" _

"_The housekeepers going t' keep an eye on her." _

"_Kay then. Let's go" He dragged the suitcase down the hallway. I stood there waiting for him to return,_

"_Car's here" He said jogging back my way. _

"_A bit early?" He nodded walking over to the bed,_

"_I'll grab them you get Holly." He first took William up, then took Lillian on the other side. Both kids protested about being woken up so early,_

"_I'm tired." Willy moaned scarcely conscious, _

_"Shhhh, just go back to sleep" Paul cajoled. Lillian and William buried their heads on either sides of his neck. I saw a small smile creep on his face, he was clearly in love with both of them. I saw him tilt his head downward a little bit singing to both of them in whispers. I followed him downstairs and into the living room, I picked up Holly and looked around,_

"_Did we forget anything?" He looked pretty confident,_

"_No, come on."_ _We left the house, I could see through the gate a few flashes of cameras. This time it didn't scare me so much, Paul seemed to have everything under control. The driver opened the door for me, I slid in across the backseat, with Paul Lillian and William rounding up the lineup. We managed to get through the gates swiftly, thankfully the windows were tinted so there was no chance of anyone getting a decent photograph. ____It was a short ride to the building, word hadn't got out that we were there. We headed up to my apartment. I rushed in and dragged a blanket down on the floor lying Holly on it, Paul followed suit putting the 5 year olds on the floor next to her. I pointed at Lillian's room; we both went in and had an easy time packing up her items. He then followed me to my room and helped me pack my odds and ends; it was a pretty quick job considering I always kept a suitcase half packed just in case of an emergency trip. Now it was the hard part. I deliberately slowed down the last parts of packing; I really didn't want to go to Tessa's apartment._

Paul's P.O.V.

_He noticed Rachael slow down, he instantly knew what was wrong,_

"_Do you want me to do it?" She looked up at him with a heartbreaking, but appreciative expression, _

_"Would you?"_

"_Yeah, where are the keys?" Rachael dug into her bra and pulled out a key with a slightly embarrassed expression, she placed it in his palm._

"_Make sure you don't forget anything, okay?" She confirmed,_

"_I promise, I'll be right back." Paul left the apartment cautiously aware of his surroundings, no one was in sight so he took the elevator to the floor below. He arrived outside Tessa's flat pushing the door open. He flipped on the light; the apartment was almost identical to Rachael's except this one seemed to be just a tad bit larger. Paul felt a little uncomfortable; he was a stranger after all in this apartment. It was a bit like hallowed ground. He looked around for a moment and located Williams's room. He got into the boy's closet and began packing clothes with the small suitcase he brought. Before leaving the room he scanned it once more. _

_Paul quickly picked up some of the toys that were on his bed and threw them into the suitcase as well for good measure; he thought that it would be better to bring things to keep the children occupied than to leave them bored._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I waited until I heard the door click shut, signaling that Paul had left. I truly was grateful that he had volunteered to get William's things, it was a bit too soon for me to see her home again without her in it. 'I should probably get ready' I thought aloud. I changed into a new dress, and then walked into my bathroom. I expertly brushed out my hair, to redo it. I left my long tendrils to cascade down my shoulders and back while curling them slightly until they were long and flowing then threw my side bangs back up into a small poof. I did a once over with hairspray and my style was complete. I started to redo my makeup when Paul walked back in, he went to my side and hopped up, taking a seat on the expansive bathroom counter. _

"_Everything good?" I asked while finishing my blush. He nodded and continued watching me apply my makeup,_

"_What's that?" He asked when I went for my mascara wand,_

"_Eyelash stuff." He continued watching and smiled a little bit,_

"_I haven't seen you do your makeup since that television show in Hamburg." I laughed at the memory. The four boys were crowded around me as I explained what each makeup product was, and what it did. John and George scoffed, they just didn't get it. Ringo was more interested when she was doing her hair, and Paul silently evaluated her the whole time. I finally finished up and crammed the remainder of the makeup into my luggage. _

_Paul's P.O.V_

_He watched as Rachael applied her makeup. He didn't think she actually needed it though. She had such radiant skin and her hair always looked good to him, never mind, she looked stunning whatever way she chose. After she had finished up the two found themselves back in the living room, he checked his watch._

"_We've got about an hour." She nodded and the twosome went over to where the kids were spread out sleeping on the floor. They were surprised to find that Holly was awake though, she was wiggling about on the floor waiting to be picked up. He scooped her up and she started to laugh, this surprised Paul a little bit, she was so young. He had barely heard a peep out of her besides the coughing and occasionally crying, he was truly amazed though, she was such a cutie._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

"_Bring her over here." I whispered to him. I led to another sitting room adjoining to the living room and sat down on the couch, the door started knocking before he could follow me. I saw Paul walk over to the door letting in an attendant who took our luggage,_

"_Lovely daughter you have there sir." The man complimented Paul on his way out. Paul just smiled and nodded in thanks without any effort to correct the worker. He then came over to where I was sitting and placed the baby between us, _

"Look at her hands, Rach," said Paul with a keyed up grin on his face. "She's so tiny. I've seen babies before, but she's just lovely, isn't she?"

My heart turned over inside of me, watching him with the baby. He was clearly in adoration, enchanted by the tiny child; with no more than a giggle she had completely wrapped the man around her little pink finger, as effortlessly as breathing. No stranger would ever suspect that this child was not his own from the way he looked at her, it was an honest mistake on the attendants part, I still didn't know how I felt about him not correcting the man about being Holly's father. Whatever, probably just wanted him out of here quick is all, I thought.

"Hey, Rach," he said gently, "Are you happy as I am?" He stretched over to kiss me delicately on the lips. I shrugged, not trusting my voice; my throat was tight with regret. I really didn't want to tell him that this was all happening too fast and maybe I wasn't ready for all of this. I mean come on? Just hours ago he had walked in and instantly become Lillian's father. Then Phillip broke up with me, and I had custody of my deceased best friend's child. It was a lot to take in for one night. Now adding the fact that he wanted to start off where they had left off? Was I being crazy or was this more than I could handle? We couldn't just start off where we were in Hamburg; we were young stupid kids back then. He, at the time, was a barely known musician, and I was a vastly successful model. Now our lives had changed dramatically- I had dropped out of the public eye was now a mother of 2, and had to take care of a third child. He was now far away from his 'unknown musician' status, Paul was easily one of the world's most famous men at the moment, and he thought we could go back to where we were?

He parted my lips with his tongue, I started to draw back; I had not been kissed that way since Hamburg - _no_, I told Myself, I _can't let this be like this. That was a long time ago, and this is not what I want. _

"Relax," he whispered, leaning in close to me once more, "I'll stop if you want me to, but..."

"I did, I _do_, I just can't -" I paused, trying to find the words to explain. Suddenly it was all too much for me. I felt sick leaning forward placing my elbows on my knees and resting my aching, confused head in my hands.

Paul was puzzled, he laid Holly down on the floor pulling me close and starting whispering into my ear, "Babe, what is it, tell me, what's wrong?" I couldn't speak, how could I explain this?

"Rachael, honey, tell me what's wrong. Did I do something to upset you? I didn't mean it, if I did. Why did you pull away? It's just me, you know me." I obviously knew it was just him, but not the same 'him' from Hamburg.

"Paul" I said collecting my thoughts, "This is much too fast. You're... we…. I." I couldn't think of the words to put together. It took me a few minutes, "We are not the same people as we were before."

"I know that, I was a stupid bloke who let the only girl I've ever loved get away." Why did he have to make this so difficult, couldn't he understand where I was coming from?

"No Paul, you don't understand what I'm saying. Our lives are a hundred percent different now, we can just jump into a relationship."

"We aren't jumping into anything." He countered.

"What do you call going to Greece? What about all the kisses, and you making me tell you that I love you? How is that not jumping into something?" He looked thoughtful for a moment.

"You're saying you don't want any part of this?"

"I'm not saying that, I'm just not sure you know what you are getting yourself into."

Paul's P.O.V.

He thought about what she said for a moment, did he want all of this? Of course he did! He wanted everything- the kids, the responsibility, the everything. But most importantly he wanted her.

"What do I have to do to prove to you that this is what I want?"

"Honestly, I haven't a clue."

"If I can prove to you that this is what I truly want, will you take me back?" He was a bit nervous she was taking so long to answer this question, after about five minutes she finally responded,

"Maybe." And that was all he needed.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_I left Holly with Paul as I took a last minute run around the flat to make sure we hadn't forgotten anything. I speedily made a few bottles for Holly and stuffed them into my purse. Paul watched with an amused expression on his face, I must have looked silly rummaging through the closets and re-checking other rooms of the house,_

"_Hey Rach" Paul said coming up behind me holding Holly,_

"_What?"_

"_I just noticed we missed dinner." The thought dawned on me, it was true we did miss dinner, I wasn't hungry though,_

"_Woops, you hungry?" He nodded and followed me to the kitchen. I hastily threw together a sandwich finally passing it to him. He took a seat at the table, holding Holly with one arm, and holding the sandwich in the other. He bounced her a bit on his knee,_

"_You're not going to eat?" He questioned through a mouthful of food._

"_Nah, I'm not hungry." He shrugged it off, _

"_You should probably eat something anyways." I rolled my eyes,_

"_Thanks for the concern mom, but I think I'll be alright." I answered sarcastically. He scrunched up his nose and crossed his eyes at my comment. After he was done I started washing the dishes while he kept the baby occupied._ _Finally the time came for us to leave, I had Holly and Paul returned from the living room holding both William and Lillian. They both looked dead asleep in his arms,_

"_Did they even wake up?" I asked,_

"_No." He said chuckling, "You ready?" _

"_Yeah, lets go." __We exited the flat and went down the back service entrance to pile into our awaiting car. _

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_Lillian woke up when she heard a door slam._

"_Where are we goin'? Lily asked the darkness, she couldn't see anything but she knew she was in a car on daddy's lap. _

"_Airport." He answered quietly. She nodded and started to reach out for William to make sure he was with them._

_William's P.O.V._

_He felt a hand on his arm when he woke up, he tried to make sense of where he presently was. It only took him a minute to figure out that he was in the car sitting with Lillian on her daddy's' lap. Lily was next to him searching for him. He grabbed her hand and held on it tight so she knew where he was. The pair continued to keep a hold of each other as a bit of a security blanket. _

_Paul's P.O.V_

_At last the car finally arrived to the airport. As they were pulling up the curb he noticed some reporters waiting for them, as well as a security guard. When the car stopped he rolled down his window a tad bit, and gave instructions to the guard,_

"_Absolutely no pictures." The guard nodded,_

"_Give me a minute before you get out." Paul rolled the window back up watching the man. The guard started to disperse the little crowd that was gathering, he waited until the last of them had left before getting out of the car as well with Will and Lily. Rachael got out with Holly. Luckily not too many people were in the airport as it was very early in the morning. The guard took us to a private room to wait for the flight, they made themselves comfortable on the couches while flicking on the T.V. Ritch and Mo hadn't arrived yet._

_Rachael's P.O.V_

_I placed Holly on a blanket on the floor in front of me, she felt a little warm but I thought nothing of it. Soon enough Lily and Will were wide awake. They were snuggling up to Paul and I on the couch. Lillian had her thumb in her mouth with her head resting on Paul's lap, William was nearly in the same position with his head resting in my lap and after a while, a man sporting an airline jacket entered the room_

"_Can I get you anything, ma'am?" he asked. I thought about it for a minute,_

"_Scotch and coke would be nice." He smiled and turned to Paul while I turned my attention back to the T.V._

"_And for you, sir?" _

"_Water, thanks" The employee went to go get the drinks. We sat watching the news for a while, I was half way listening until I heard the words__-_

_**'Paul McCartney has been spotted with former model Rachael Belter late last night.' **_

_Paul swiftly walked up to the T.V. without saying a word and changed the channel. _

"_Don't need to be watching that rubbish" He muttered, It felt bizarre to see myself on the television again, I was thankful Paul had switched it off though. He slouched back down on the sofa as Lillian repositioned herself. We continued watching the telly until the man came back with our drinks. I took a sip of mine, the door swung open again. Mo Ritch, Zak and Jason were here. Mo and I greeted each other excitedly, we started pointing out and naming the kids for each other,_

"_I'm so glad you guys decided to come!" Mo gushed,_

"_Me too." Everybody blissfully chatted for a while, but then Holly started crying. I handed my drink for Paul to hold and pulled a bottle out of my bag while picking up the baby off the floor to feed her, she couldn't handle the bottle though. The hacking cough started up again. I was alarmed by it. She had just been fine a moment ago, what had happened? I stood up and walked her to the other side of the room and sat down in a chair, trying to soothe her. Paul turned his head around to watch, _

"_What's wrong?" He mouthed silently. I shrugged my shoulders, if I knew what was wrong with her I would've fixed it. Mo and Ritch were on the opposite couch deep in conversation. Paul moved the kids over and strode over from the couch, I looked up at him helplessly,_

"_Do you think she can handle the trip?" He whispered, I looked back down at Holly, the coughing fit had slowed down a bit,_

"_Maybe, give her a minute." We both watched the child tire herself out from hacking. She started to doze off,_

"_Well, what do you think?" He inquired. I tried to assess the situation, she was beginning to get warmer, and the coughing sounded just as bad as it had at the house. She would definitely be able to make it on the plane, but what if she got sick during the flight? _

"_Maybe this isn't such a great idea. What if something happens while we're in the air?" He was still peering down at Holly._

"_Does she have a fever anymore?" He asked reaching down for her forehead, he pulled his hand back a little after feeling the heat radiate off it, he gave me a troubled look,_

"_Rach, she's really hot again. We should probably have her checked out." He squatted down on his knees to get a look at the baby,_

"_What do we do?" I asked looking down at him._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He knew he had to make a careful judgment; he quickly weighed the pro's and con's of continuing the trip in his head. The pro's were getting away from the paparazzi, and getting everyone safely to one place where they wouldn't be bothered, but on the other hand it could be quite risky bringing an ill baby on the plane. He felt a hand on his shoulder. Paul looked to the right of him and saw Ritchie squatting next to him,_

"_What's the problem 'ere?" His friend asked._

"_The baby's sick, we don't know if we should go." His friend nodded, and Holly started coughing once again, this time it sounded somewhat shoddier._

_Rachael's P.O.V.  
_

_I looked down at Paul who was focused on the baby, and then over to Ringo who was looking back at me. He smiled in light of the situation at hand,  
_

_"I see you've an ill little bugger 'ere." I nodded, and Paul finally stood up and took the baby, He and Ritch began discussing the problem. I just listened, they finally came to a verdict,_

"_Rach, what do you think if you, Holly and I took a flight a bit later so we can go have her checked out?" He asked,_

"_William and Lillian could come with Mo and I." Ringo chipped in,_

"_I don't know, Ritch, four kids would be a lot for you two to handle on the flight." _

"_Come on, I insist." Richard turned around beckoning Mo to come over, Ritch put an arm around her. Maureen looked concerned when she heard Holly's barking cough,_

"_My goodness, is she sick?"Paul nodded and Ritch explained what his and Paul's plan was, Maureen whole heartedly agreed,_

"_Of course we'll take William and Lillian. They're getting along so well with Zak, it wouldn't be a problem at all." She truly seemed like she meant it, _

"_Alright, thanks Mo." She gave me a hug, while Paul was tending to Holly. Mo and I went back over to where the kids were,_

"_Lily, William." They both pulled their attention away from the game they were playing with Zak,_

"_You guys are going to go on the airplane with auntie Mo and uncle Ritch, is that okay?"_

"_What about you and daddy?" Lil questioned,_

"_We are coming a tad bit later wit Holly, is that fine?" They both nodded barely fazed by this information, they turned back to Zak and continued playing. Paul came up behind me, he already had Holly bundled up in a blanket,_

"_Ready to go?" he asked, I nodded and gave final kisses to both of the kids who wiped them off and giggled. _

"_See you soon." Mo and Ritch called out as we left the waiting room. _


	7. Chapter 7

Rachael's P.O.V

Paul spoke with the guard and we were escorted to a shiny black car. The guard held the door open for me as I climbed in along with Paul and Holly. The vehicle pulled away from the curb, Holly was wheezing up a storm in Paul's arms. He looked back up at me with a concerned expression, I was completely frightened.

Paul's P.O.V

He looked up at Rachael, her eyes were wide and she was biting her lip.

"Hey, mate, step on it will you?" He called up to the driver; the response was a thumbs up and a nod in the rearview mirror. Rachael scooted closer to him watching Holly closely, he knew he had to find a way to calm her down, hell, he needed a way to calm himself down. He remembered when he was younger and his younger brother Mike was sick, his own father couldn't stomach the 'gross stuff'' as he had put it, and Paul was given the task of taking care of the ailing lad. This was nothing like it though, Mike used to have fevers but not this kind of cough, he was pretty sure if this baby coughed any harder her lungs would come up.

"How far are we?" Rachael asked leaning forward to speak to the driver,

"About 5 minutes, not to worry miss."

Rachael's P.O.V.

All we could do was wait. Holly was howling in a feverish irritated way, obviously intensely uncomfortable. It was agonizing not to be able to help her, but there was nothing either Paul or I could do. I felt Paul lace his fingers in mine, neither of us wanted to admit it but we were truly scared out of our wits. We finally arrived to the hospital and were greeted by a rather small army of doctors and nurses who had been informed that a Beatle was stopping in for a visit.

"Great." Paul mumbled, he got up out of the car pulling me along with him, the medical staff took Holly and entered the hospital, Paul managed to keep us within a steps distance of where she was all while politely trying to mind the physicians and nurses who were more interested in him rather than Holly. When our entourage arrived at the examination room for Holly a woman tried to stop us from going in,

"Excuse me, but we don't permit family members in the room." She had a flirtatious smile on and she was fluttering her eyelashes at Paul. He instantly became aggravated and tried sidestepping her, she blocked him.

"But you can feel free to stay in the waiting room." I saw his jaw instantaneously become rigid,

"Listen here," He said in a dangerously close whisper to the nurse, "We are going into the room whether you like it 'er not."

"But sir it's against our regulations I-", Paul pressed past her bringing me along. Another person tried to derail us but Paul was way past the point of caring, he managed to get us right next the table where Holly was being checked out. The doctor looked up for a moment,

"How did you get in here?"

"Never mind that, what's the matter with her?"

"Sir we are going to have to ask you and your wife to leave."

"I'm not his—"I started to say but Paul cut me off,

"It's our kid. We're staying." Holly's cough made the tension in the room rise.

"Sir, I'm going to ask you one more time. You and your wife need to go to the waiting room. Then we can start the assessment." Paul let out a frustrated huff, and took me to the waiting room. I sat down on the chair watching him pace with frustration. Luckily no one else was in the room, I watched a few nurses peek their heads in the room but they would be overtaken by giggles about seeing their favorite Beatle live and up-close in person to be able to walk in. Paul paid no attention to them, he was blistering mad. There was a point where I was pretty sure he was going to punch the wall, but he just kept his fists clenched while his temper boiled. I was leaning forward with my elbows on my knees and my head resting in my hands. I was distraught with worry, what if something was terribly wrong with the baby? I covered my face and continued leaning forward. Eventually I felt a hand rubbing my back, it was Paul. He had finally cooled off enough to sit down. I uncovered my face and looked back at him, his eyes were wide, and concerned,

"Are you okay?" I shook my head; my voice had left my body. All I wanted to do was see Holly, what was taking them so long? Various hospital personnel paused outside of the room and looked inside to gape at Paul and I. About an hour passed, and finally a nurse came in with forums that needed to be signed.

"If you could just fill these out." She handed the papers to me while winking at Paul, he kept his face frozen. An empty, expressionless mask slipping into place as it hadn't for some time- perfected by years of practice. He leaned over and we began to look through the documents.

"I don't know half of this!" I exclaimed, they wanted to know all of Holly's information, I could fill out the basic facts, but I didn't know any of the other stuff. The nurse looked back down with me and her sickeningly sweet smile,

"You're not the child's parent?"

"No, she's my niece." The nurse tilted her head to the side a bit, "Mmm? So where are her parents?" Why was she being so nosy?

"That's not important right now," Paul cut in,

"We can fill out these papers, but how is the baby?"

"Oh, Mr. McCartney, the doctors aren't done yet with the patient."

"Well, what's taking so fucking long?" He questioned shooting her a deathly glare. The woman seemed a bit shocked by his harsh choice of language,

"I… I don't know sir." She stuttered and started backing towards the door, she finally left obviously a bit frightened of Paul's intimidating stare. "Stupid bird." He muttered and continued to look through the paperwork as if nothing had happened.

"Okay" He said, "Why don't we fill out as much as we know, and then try to get a hold of your sister?" I nodded; I hadn't even thought about my sister, she would definitely want to know Holly was in the hospital. Time passed as we were putting down the required fields of the papers. As soon as we had done that, we only needed her parents information, I stood up and made my way over to the phone and attempted to call Kelley's hotel—but to no avail. I returned to my chair,

"No answer."

"It's fine, we'll try them later." A large, red-haired woman strode into the room,

"Excuse me, are you here for-" She paused checking the names on her clipboard, "Holly Belter-Frank?"

"Yes, yes we are." The woman smiled a bit,

"If you would follow me." Paul and I followed the woman down the hallway, she stopped in front of a door, and silently pushed it open, I was shocked by what I saw. Little Holly was resting in a hospital cradle with numerous wires jutting out of her, a little oxygen mask was plastered on her tiny face as well.

"Oh shit." Paul breathed out and we quietly tiptoed up to the side of her bed, I was horrified,

"What's wrong with her?" I asked the nurse, and began trembling a bit.

"She's just had a bit of trouble breathing, she'll be right as rain soon enough." I couldn't say anything. I just stared.

"A bit of trouble?" Paul started, "She's got bloody wires sticking out of her." The nurse wasn't deterred by his daunting presence.

"The doctors will be here in a moment. If you need anything, I'll be in the room across the hall." She made her exit and I just watched the baby in a dazed manner. Paul came around and stood next to me pulling me close. I could feel anything, I was completely numb: frankly, hospitals scared the crap out of me.

"We'll be fine." He whispered, "She'll be fine." Holly was asleep; all I could hear were the beeps coming from the machines she was attached to. The doctor came in and ignored us while he examined the baby.

"It looks like she'll be alright, Mr. and Mrs. McCartney." He said looking up,

"Actually, we're not marr—" I started, but Paul interrupted,

"So she can come home with us?" The doctor chuckled,

"She'll need to be kept here for the next few hours, but I don't see why not." Paul shook his hand,

"I'll be back in about an hour to check on the child once again."

"Good." Paul nodded while the doctor made his way out. The two of us didn't say much as time passed. We just stood there looking at the baby consumed by our own thoughts. "That was a close one." Paul whispered, "Yeah." I said quietly. Neither of us wanted to disturb Holly.

Paul's P.O.V.

She looked so small, with all those wires attached to her. He sighed and drew Rachael closer. He could hardly breathe; the doctor had said Holly was fine. All he wanted to do was pull the wires out and bring the baby, and Rachael home. He noticed people passing by the glass window more than once, obviously they were watching the trio. This irritated him to no end, why couldn't they just leave them alone? This was none of their business, oh god. They would probably go to the papers with the story**—Sick Beatle Baby—**flashed in his head. Paul suddenly remembered, this wasn't his kid. But why was he so bloody attached? Why did he feel the need to protect her, Why was Holly his only thought at the moment? He gulped a little bit, while blinking fiercely to hold back his emotions. Who gave a shit that Holly wasn't his child, she seemed to belong to him by nature, and given the current situation her parents were not about. The child depended on Rachael and himself and he was determined to not let either of them down.

Rachael's P.O.V.

The time finally came for us to leave, the doctors came back to give us the final instructions—we would be able to fly out the next morning, thankfully, but Holly would have to be given medicine. That was more than okay with me, as long as she was healthy. They started pulling the wires out and I couldn't watch, I buried my face in Paul's chest. He held me tight until the ordeal was over. Paul picked up the unconscious baby, cradling her in one arm and placing the other around me. The three of us left the hospital, hurrying into another car. We finally settled in on the way to his house,

"I thought I was supposed to be getting a change of scenery" I said quietly. Paul looked up at me with an eyebrow raised,

"But so far, I've been in a train and a room, and a car and a room, and a room and a room, I'm feeling decidedly straight-jacketed." Paul busted out laughing, realizing that I was quoting his movie.

"You're awful." He said, continuing to chuckle. I smiled, and looked down at Holly, she was still sleeping. We became calm after a while, the worst was behind us now and we could finally look forward to going to Greece. I glanced up to notice Paul was still looking at me. He kept one arm embracing Holly but he took the other to the back of my head and drew my face close to his. He kissed my lips gently.

"I'm sorry; I don't know what overcame me." He said pulling back almost nervously. I pulled him back into the kiss, this time, I didn't mind.

Rachael's P.O.V.

When we arrived back at Paul's house it was around 3 in the afternoon. Holly was still knocked out so we put her in the living room. Paul and I were in the kitchen chatting away, while playing with Martha. She was such a silly dog! I was still a little dazed from the kiss- did I really want this? I mean sure Paul was a great guy, but I obviously knew his faults. The drugs and drinking I could handle, but the other women would not be to my liking. I must have been daydreaming because he interrupted my thoughts,

"Hey Rach, you hungry?" He asked.

"Nope."

"Well, you've got to eat something. You haven't eaten since yesterday afternoon." He picked up my wrist with a chuckle,

"You can't have wrists that thin and not be hungry." I smiled and rolled by eyes, while pulling my arm away,

"Thanks, but really I'm not hungry. Go ahead and eat." He shrugged and proceeded to warm up food that the housekeeper had left in the refrigerator. He dropped some for Martha, made a plate for himself, then slid another plate to me,

"Humor me. I can't have you starving on my watch." I picked at a bit of cooking, not really interested. I pushed it around my plate; Paul was watching me the entire time. Holly started fussing from the living room; thankful for the distraction I went to go check on her. Before I could even pick her up she was back asleep, I decided to leave her there to rest. I went back to the kitchen Paul was on the phone rescheduling the flight with Mal. It only took him a second after I sat back down. He hung up and came over by me to continue eating. I picked up my plate and threw out the food, placing the dirty dish in the sink.

"You're really not hungry?" He said watching me from his chair. I shook my head.

"Are you tired?"

"No, actually." I was being truthful; I was neither hungry nor tired. He scrunched up his face for a moment,

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes, mom." I said sarcastically. It was funny how much he cared what I was doing. He shrugged,

"Okay. By the way the flight has been scheduled for around midnight."

"Sounds good." I waited until he was done eating and we journeyed back to the living room to watch T.V. The show that was on was quite boring, but Paul's cynical remarks about the show were enough to make it bearable, so much so that I couldn't stop laughing, and it only encouraged him to keep making comments. After a while Holly had woken up, she contently sat with us messing around with her ears.

"Why does she keep pulling on her ears?" Paul asked looking at the baby.

"She's probably just tired." I said shrugging,

"Lil used to do that when she was tired too." He nodded, taking this as a satisfactory answer. The phone started to ring he picked it up and handed it to me, it was Mo. We filled each other in on everything that had gone on. They had all arrived safely, and the kids were all having a great time.

"It's cute though." She commented, "Lily and William never seem to be more than an arm's length away from each other." This comforted me, I filled her in on our travel plans and we finished the phone call. I handed the receiver back to Paul, and he put it back on the cradle,

"Everything alright over on their end?" I nodded and filled him in on what Mo had said. This seemed to put both of us in a good mood. The time had finally come for us to leave again, and we made it to the airport and boarded the plane without a hitch. Mal had arranged for the plane that Ritch, Maureen and the kids had used earlier to be sent back for us. I took Holly to one of the plush chairs making a little bed for her to use. She was still drowsy for the medications at the hospital and fell into a comfortable sleep; she wouldn't even be disturbed by the takeoff at all. Paul was up chatting with the pilot while I ordered myself a drink. By the time he came back I was lounging on the couch reading a magazine. He nearly sat down on top of me,

"Whacha readin' miss?" He said leaning over the publication,

"Quit being nosy." I laughed swatting away at him,

"I'm not nosy, just lemme read it with you." I relented and let him place an arm around my shoulder to get a better look. After a bit he started to yawn,

"You're not tired yet?" He questioned burying his face into my neck, I squirmed a little, I was still absorbed in the reading,

"No, you can sleep though." He took this as an invitation to turn off the light above our heads and lay down his head on my lap I had to lift the magazine up,

"Paul, there's another couch over there." I said looking down at him, he still had his eyes closed,

"I wanna sleep here, with you. You're just soooo comfortable." He whined.

"I need the light to read though" He kept his eyes closed,

"Stop reading then and take a kip with me." I rolled my eyes slightly amused by his antics,

"You're exasperating." He was trying to keep a straight face, but the smile tugging at the corner of his lips was giving him away,

"No. I'm endearing." He countered. I started giggling, and gave up trying to move him. He was so childish sometimes. I put down the magazine and turned my attention to the window. The sky outside was a dark almost purplish-black, little flits of light could be spotted from the ground, we hadn't yet started to fly over the ocean, we were still nearing the coast. I loved looking out the window; the world looked so peaceful from up here. I hadn't noticed it but I was playing with Paul's hair. I slowly took back my hands and placed them on the arm rest, Paul awoke with a start almost his eyes squinting open,

Paul's P.O.V

"Why'd you stop?" He mumbled, "Don't." Her hands were so warm and reassuring, when she stopped playing about with his hair, he instantly felt cold. She began messing with it again, usually if someone had mussed with his hair he would have been upset. He liked to be kept neat and in order, but Rachael was different. She was gently curling it around her fingers and stroking it. After a moment or so he fell back into a relaxed snooze.

Rachael's P.O.V

His mini outburst surprised me a bit, but I continued to absent mindedly play with it, a stewardess peeked her head into the room,

"Would you like anything?" She whispered.

"Just some wine, please." She retrieved it and returned quietly back to her quarters. I sat for a while sipping at my drink and looking out the window. I had a few hours to kill before we landed. I took my time to think about all that had gone on, the hours passed quickly and the pilot informed me we would be landing within the next 30 minutes. I gently shook Paul,

"Wake up." He garbled an incoherent protest,

"Come on, I have to go to the bathroom. Let me up." He refused and pouted slightly,

"Just stay 'ere. I'm comfy." I smiled a bit and slid his head out of my lap and made my way to the bathroom. I started to fix my makeup and my hair, Paul entered the small bathroom and snaked his arms around my waist while shoving his face into my neck,

"I'm tired." He complained, his breath tickling the nape of my neck, I wiggled about, he noticed my ticklishness and took full advantage.

Paul's P.O.V.

Even through his drowsy stupor he noticed how ticklish Rachael was. He smiled wrapping his arms around her so she couldn't move. He shoved his face even farther into her neck and started talking. The tremors from his voice were making her squirm and laugh, and the bit of unshaved shadow from his chin was prickling her skin. Rachael was convulsing from laughter and trying to twist away. After a bit more of the torture, he eventually let her go and watched her stumble out of the bathroom. Smiling to himself in the mirror he fixed his hair and realized this was probably the happiest he had been in a while. He just wished Rachael would let him love her.


	8. Chapter 8

**_A/N: This is about where I left off, Hope you like it!_**

* * *

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

_The plane finally landed at 8:00 a.m. while I was finishing collecting all my belongings and stuffing them into my purse. Paul came out of the bathroom readjusting the cuffs of his dress shirt, and waited as I slid on my sunglasses. I quickly chugged the remainder of my wine as he watched in amusement, and gathered up Holly. We exited the plane getting into the car waiting up on the tarmac for us. I took a look out the window as soon as we were situated, Greece was beautiful! I had already been here once, but last time the weather had been horrible, this time there was sparkling blue skies and it was hot, hot, hot even though it was September. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He looked over at Rachael, who was holding Holly while pointing out the scenery and vast ocean whizzing past to the baby. A warm, loving feeling washed over him. Rachael was amazing, everything she did was to perfection, everyone she talked to adored her, and she was one of the most gorgeous women he had ever laid eyes upon. He couldn't help but feel proud that she was his child's mother. He knew she wanted to take it slow, but he couldn't help it. He needed her; he had to make her his own. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_The car finally pulled up to the hotel and the three of us got out of the car, the manager had already been alerted that we had landed and was waiting for us in the lobby. He escorted us to the floor Mal had rented out for us, Mo and Ritch's suite was adjacent to ours, their door was wide open. I stuck my head in their door._

"_Hello?" I called, a stampede of tiny feet came rushing out at me,_

"_HI!" Lily and William attacked Paul and I's legs with hugs. Mo and Ritch were not far behind,_

"_Hey!" Mo came and gave me a hug, Ritch did the same. They both seemed to be in wonderful moods. Mo took Holly from me so I could smooch my other kids, they wiped them away put lapped up the attention, after I had my fill, they ran over to Paul. Mo and I began gossiping away; finally Paul and Ritch had to stop us so we could go get ourselves situated in our own room. Paul and I took the kids across the hall and into our own suite. Lily and William bounded in to explore dragging me along with them. The room was grand; there were high vaulted ceilings, and marble floors. Lily and Will wanted to share a room so they got one of the sitting room. A hotel crib was already set up in the same room for Holly's use. Will and Lily were clamoring on and on about the ocean. _

"_Mum, we have to go now!" Lil shrieked with excitement._

"_Yeah! Uncle Ritch only brought us down to the pool, not the ocean!" Will chimed in. They ran out of the room and helped each other drag their suitcases back in. Within seconds both were stripped down and rushed to get into their swim costumes. I hadn't even had time to check out the rest of the room before they were hurrying me along,_

"_Go mum, change!" Lil demanded. _

"_Honey I haven't even been here 5 seconds. I haven't even seen my own room yet!" She and William put on identical pouting faces until I relented and placed Holly in her crib and rushed to throw on my bikini and a cover-up. I got Holly ready and they dragged me out the door._

"_Paul, were going down to the beach!" I shouted as they dragged me along. I called into the Starkey's room for Mo. She was being pulled to the door by Zak who was also in his swim costume she had Jason in her arms as I had Holly in mine,_

"_Where are we going?" Mo giggled as the kids dragged us to the elevators,_

"_The beach!" I answered.  
We finally made it to the beach; we watched Will, Lily, and Zak frolic in the water, as we played with the babies under an umbrella. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He finally managed to drag all of the suitcases into their room, it was oddly silent though, where had everyone gone? He walked over to Mo and Ritch's suite,_

"_Ritch, where did everyone go?" He hollered. A bewildered Ringo greeted him,_

"_The kids dragged Rachael and Maureen down to the beach." Both the men threw on their swim trunks and headed down to the beach._

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

"_So", Maureen started, _

_"What's going on with you and Paul?" I shrugged my shoulders with an embarrassed grin on my face,_

"_We decided to take it slow and see where it goes." I giggled while Mo swatted playfully at me_

"_No way! Paul does not take anything slowly! I know..." she started,_

"_Ah…you know what?" Paul and Ringo plopped down beside us. I stifled a laugh while__ Maureen's face turned pink,_

"_Hey boys didn't hear you coming." She smiled sheepishly,_

"_Have we been telling stories, Maureen?" He asked teasingly, she shrugged her shoulders while we both tried to suppress laughter. _

"_You know what we do with story tellers, Mo?" He said standing up,_

"_We take them for a swim!" He quickly picked up a hysterically laughing Maureen and ran with her into the water. He plopped her down and ran back to the beach. Ringo and I were rolling with hilarity.  
_

_"You next!" He said reaching for me. _

"_No Paul!" I shrieked, I still had my cover-up on and I didn't want to get it wet,_

"_Sorry Rach, I have to teach you a lesson." He grinned cheekily as he threw me over his shoulder and started to run towards the water, I wiggled out of my cover-up and whipped it back in the sand. Paul launched me into the water and I resurfaced uncontrollably giggling. I swam up next to Maureen, who was messing about with the kids. After a bit Mo and I headed back to the beach to relieve Ringo of baby duty. _

_Paul's P.O.V. _

_He and Ringo were wading in the water keeping an eye on the three older kids. As Rachael and Mo headed out of the water, Rachael's figure caught his eye. Richard quietly whistled and Paul turned his attention to him,_

"_Eye's off, mate", He said with a wink, _

_"She's mine." Ringo chuckled,_

"_No need to worry, son. I'm already married." __The men turned their full attention back to the children, who began having a fine time using himself and Richard for a diving board. Both men were on their knees in, lifting each child out of the water with their interlaced hands and tossing them a few feet to land screeching into the water._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Mo and I were lying out in the sun next to the umbrella where the babies were. _

"_Oh my lord, I'm baking." Mo said propping herself up on her elbows._

"_Me too, what time's it?" Mo reached into her beach bag and pulled out her watch,_

"_About 12, I need a drink." I chuckled; the kids were still messing about on the beach with Ritch and Paul. _

"_There's a bar up there I think" I said, pointing back at the hotel._

"_Let's drop the kids off with Marianne, and then we can go." I nodded and packed up Holly while she packed up Jason. Marianne was the Starkey's nanny, they had brought her along for the trip to help us take care of the kids._

"_Should we tell Paul and Ritch?" I asked, Maureen gave me a wicked grin,_

"_No, we can go have some fun without the boys, they can take care of the older kids." We both dissolved into laughter as we snuck off the beach and ran back to the hotel. After dropping the babies off Mo and I went back down to the bar and ordered copious amounts of alcohol. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_It was around 5 o'clock when the older kids were done playing in the water, but where had the girls gone?_

"_Ritch, where are Maureen and Rachael?" He shrugged and the men went back to the umbrella only to discover all the women's belongings gone, as well as the babies,_

"_They probably went back to the room." The men took the older kids back into the hotel and up to their floor, when they entered the suite they found Marianne who was busy taking care of Holly and Jason._

"_Mari, where are Mo and Rach?" The nanny shrugged with a smile, _

"_They said it was a secret." Paul looked over to Ringo who was just as confused as himself,_

"_Mari, can we leave the older kids here with you?" The older woman nodded and took Lily, Zak, and William to get changed out of their wet swimming suits. He went back over to Ringo,_

"_Should we go look for them?" Ritch nodded and called out to Marianne,_

"_We'll be back later." __He and Ritch changed into dry clothes and left to go look for the ladies._

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

_Mo and I had found new friends at the bar. We started our own little party with the other guests who were just about as tipsy as we were. Mo and I were flirting shamelessly with the barkeep, it wasn't because we were tipsy…. maybe just a bit._

"_Rach," Mo was giggling furiously, "We should run away with him!" This got the two of us cracking up in hysterics, so much so that half of my drink spilled out of my glass,  
_

_"Woopsy doodles! Dropped my drink Mo!" Mo grabbed my arm to stabilize herself as she crackled at my misfortune. _

"_Robert, we need more drinks!" Robert complied with a chuckle and brought us another bottle of Vodka. Mo and I popped it open instantly (With a little help from Robert), and started teasing each other,_

"_I bet-"Mo was still giggling, "I bet you can't drink half this bottle!" I was instantly charged by the challenge,_

"_I'll do it if you do it!" She shook my hand and the two of us started in on the Vodka. __It took us nearly an hour to get half way to our goal, our new friends cheered us on, Mo and I were falling __over ourselves with laughter. The barkeep, Robert, kept our glasses full with an amused smile on his face. I tried to focus on my drinking companion._

"_I believe Robert thinks we are a little tipsy." I slurred._

"_Gee, ya think?" Mo could not stop giggling as she poured more into our cups. Robert finally came over leaning on the counter to watch us,_

"_So ladies, what are you doing tomorrow?" He asked wiggling his eyebrows._

"_Ask Rachael, she's not married!" Maureen snickered in her drunken stupor. Robert winked at me,_

"_Dinner, tomorrow night?" I was flattered and accepted the offer,_

"_Of course!" I agreed giving him a sloppy kiss on the cheek. Robert had to go, his shift had ended, he bid Mo and I farewell with a wave and left the pub._ _Mo and I decided the night was too nice enough to waste so we stumbled down to the beach with our bottle and planted ourselves in the sand._ _Paul's P.O.V_ _He and Ritch had stopped for dinner, and continued on their search for the girls. They checked everywhere in the hotel, they finally decided to check the beach one last time. He spotted what seemed to be 2 extremely drunk women rolling about on the beach. As he got closer he knew it was Maureen and Rachael, he ran over and plopped down on the sand next to them,_

"_Thought I'd check on you girls," They both jumped a little spooked from his arrival. He stopped and noticed an almost empty bottle of very good Vodka. _

"_Ahh, ladies, having a fun evening?" He held up the container and they both laughed harder. Ritch picked up Maureen and started back towards the hotel, Rachael was still lying on the sand. Paul scooted closer to her patting his lap urging her to slide over, she laid her head on his lap. Paul stroked her hair looking down at her. Rachael's cheeks were flushed, her eyes very bright and Paul thought she looked even prettier._

"_How much did you girls drink?" He asked. Rachael held up 2 fingers.  
_

_"What's that supposed to mean?" Rachael avoided his eyes laughing like a child in trouble,_

"_2 bottles." He chuckled, that meant each girl had about a bottle of vodka each. Even though they weren't that big of bottles, Rachael was in for an awful hangover. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_The sky looked so pretty from where I was lying, Paul was messing with my hair and I let him._

"_Have you had anything to eat yet today?" He asked. I thought about it: No I hadn't. It was funny though, I wasn't hungry I was just in a really good mood from drinking. _

"_Nope." I replied, Paul stopped playing with my hair,_

"_Rachael, you shouldn't be drinking on an empty stomach." This irritated me a bit but I didn't let it show,_

"_I'll be fine." Who did he think he was telling me what to do all the time? He sighed and continued playing with my hair. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He sighed and continued playing with her hair. He couldn't place his finger on it: she was defiant, stubborn and very drunk, but at the same time she was stealing his heart, how the hell did this happen? Why was she so damn endearing, and why wouldn't she just let him love her? He could help it any longer. __He pulled her up into his arms and began kissing her. She didn't react at first but finally she entwined her arms around his neck accepting his kisses, running her hands through his hair. This drove him mad, He laid her down on the sand and positioned himself so he was leaning over her, propped up on one elbow. He ran a hand through her hair and drew her face close again, she turned her face away a bit avoiding his kiss. He was at a total loss, why had she just denied him? He continued watching her, his emotions running wild, he buried his face against her neck._

"_Rach, I am going crazy," he murmured against her ear. She shrugged avoiding his eyes and continued to stare into the ocean._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Shit, I had let it happen. The kisses had quickly sobered me up. I wasn't ready for a relationship now, why couldn't he just leave me alone? We continued to lay like this for a while. He kept whispering in my ear but I wasn't paying attention, I didn't mean to but I unknowingly fell asleep. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

"_I love you" He whispered into her ear. He waited a moment for a response, but she said nothing. He propped himself back onto his elbow and looked down at her, he was surprised to find she had fallen asleep. He got up picking Rachael up and carried her back to the hotel. When they arrived he went into a bedroom and placed her on the bed. He then went out across the living room and into the kids' room. Marianne had dropped them of just moments ago, they were all sleeping soundly. Lily and William wanted to share a bed, even though there were 2 beds in the room. He tucked them in turning his attention to Holly who was sleeping in her crib. __The baby was stretched out on her back, a stuffed animal under one arm with her blanket balled up and kicked to one side. She was kicking her feet about, obviously not tired,_

"_Come 'ere, love" He said picking up the baby. Paul nestled her in the crook of her arm and grabbed a bottle from the small kitchen. He took her out to the balcony taking a __seat on a lounge chair while propping Holly up at a gentle angle between his upraised knees facing him. The baby regarded him solemnly, her wide, dark brown eyes fixed upon his face. He began telling the baby his troubles, not that she had any clue what he was talking about, she just watched him with a peaceful, understanding expression. _

_"I just don't understand it Hol. Your Auntie Rachael acts like she wants me, but she won't admit it." The baby tilted her head a little, Paul took the bottle and began to feed her as he talked,_

_"I want her. I want Lillian." He stopped for a moment to wipe up her chin, and then continued feeding her,_

_"Hell, I even want William. I just don't know what your auntie wants from me." The baby listened all the while. He truly felt better after having his little 'talk' with Holly. She wasn't judging him, she just listened. He watched the skyline for a bit until Holly finished her bottle. After a while he brought her back inside, _

"_Shall we see what's on, Holly?" he switched on the T.V. turning the volume all the way down as to not disturb the rest of the sleepers. He laid down on the couch snuggling the baby against his chest to absentmindedly flip through the channels. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I awoke to an unfamiliar room and a splitting headache. It took a moment, but it all came back to me,_

"_Fuck" I muttered, Paul had kissed me last night and I wasn't ready for this. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I took a quick shower and got ready for the day. After that, I tiptoed through the living room, out the doorway, and across the hall. The Starkey's door was slightly ajar,_

"_Mo!" I whisper-shouted into the room. My partner in crime, Maureen, opened the door and slid out,_

"_Breakfast?" she whispered. She knew I was desperate to get out of here._

"_Yeah, let's go." The two of us hurried down the hallway and into the elevator. We didn't utter a word until we had reached the restaurant and were seated in a far back corner._

"_What happened?" She asked, we ducked down our heads together while I told her what had happened on the beach the night before. She came up from our little huddle with her hand placed over her mouth,_

"_He did?" I nodded, it was true Paul had kissed me._ "_Well what are you going to do about it?" I shrugged my shoulders,_

"_I don't know, it was nice I guess, but it's all too fast." She nodded taking in what I had to say. We ordered some breakfast, and continued to talk about it,_ "_Rach, what about your date with Robert?" I slapped my forehead, _

"_I forgot about that!" _"_I think you should go." Mo said. I was shocked, _

"_Do you really think so?" She nodded,_

"_Rach, it's not like you're married and Robert seems like a lot of fun. Paul wouldn't even have to know about it." I was confused, what did she mean?_

"_What do you mean Paul wouldn't know?" _"_We could ask Paul and Ritchie to watch the kids for a while, you can make the date, and I'll keep an eye out for them!" A grin crept onto my face, maybe this plan would work! _

"_Mo I absolutely love you!" She leaned over and gave me a hug. The two of us were squealing like school girls. _

"_What are you going to wear?" She shrieked._

"_I don't know, let's go shopping!" The two of us shot out of the restaurant in pursuit of shopping. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_The pair of us hadn't even touched the breakfast, we returned to our rooms to grab our purses. I tiptoed in quietly, everyone was still asleep. As I walked past the couch I noticed Holly cuddled up to Paul, when did they get there? Oh well, I retrieved my items and scribbled a quick note to Paul and placed it on the counter. Mo met me in the hall and the two of us set off._

* * *

_The new stuff start's here!_


	9. NEW STUFF!

**_A/N: Reviews please!_**

* * *

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Holly start moving about, he sat up and put her on the cushion propped up against his side, while rubbing his tired eyes. The clock read 9 o'clock, He flipped on the T.V. and cuddled with the baby some more in an effort to wake up. __He managed to grab Holly a bottle out of the fridge and grab himself a drink, the note on the counter caught his eye-_

**_Paul, _**

**_Maureen and I had to go pick up some things, be back around noon. Marianne will be coming to help out with the kids around 10._ **

_Psh, typical birds going shopping at the crack of dawn, he reread the note and thought about it some. He didn't need Marianne's help, he could do it by himself._ _After washing up Holly and leaving her with some toys in the living room he crept into Will and Lily's room. The pair of them were snoring softly cuddled up together on the bed. He sat on the bed and bounced a little to wake them up. They pair groaned,_

"_Too early." Lily muttered while shoving her head under her pillow. William grasped the covers and pulled it over his head. Paul chuckled at their behavior, _

"_Wakeup, wakeup, wakeup." William and Lily protested by digging themselves further into the mattress. Paul found their feet and started running his finger up and down the bottoms in order to tickle them. The duo pulled their feet up and scrunched themselves into balls. He got up and walked over to the window to open the curtains,_

"_Look it's sunny out!" Paul got no response. He thought for a minute,_

"_If you guys get up now, we can go get ice cream for brekky." Will and Lily shot out of bed and ran into the bathroom. Paul himself ran to his room and changed, then packed a few things up for Holly. He looked at the diaper bag, definitely not his style. Lil and Will came looking up expectantly at him,_

"_Come on daddy you said we could get ice cream." Paul was much too embarrassed to admit that he didn't want to lug the bag,_

"_Lily will you do me a favor?" She nodded impatiently,_

"_Carry this." He handed her the bag. It was quite big and the girl had a bit of trouble getting it on her shoulder,_

"_Willy, help me." She ordered nudging the other strap towards her best friend. The little boy took the other strap and pulled it along behind him. Paul got Holly from the living room and the foursome set off to the lobby. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Mo and I were shopping along the boardwalk, _

"_Mo I feel guilty leaving him with all the kids." Mo barely glanced up from the dress she was examining, _

"_Nonsense, we have to take care of the children all of the time, besides you didn't get a break for 5 years, I'm sure Paul can handle a few hours. Besides, Marianne will be along to help out." I shrugged, I still felt incredibly at fault,_

"_I guess, but Holly and William aren't even his kids." I was messing about with a pair of sunglasses on a ledge, _

"_Rachael, quit worrying. He'll be fine." I sighed,_

"_I suppose so." Mo smiled back at me,_

"_Atta girl, now go try this on." She pulled me over to a changing room and shoved a golden dress at me._ _I quickly threw the garment on and observed myself in the mirror,_

"_Rach, give us a look." Mo called from outside the drape. I stepped outside and gave her a twirl, she screeched with excitement,_

"_You look fab! Robert's going to drool over you in that number!" I giggled completely flattered with her comment; Mo was rapidly becoming a close companion of mine even after just a single day. The saleswoman rang us up and we were on our way._

"_You need shoes to go with that dress, Ooo! Look Rach, a jewelry shop!" We flitted from shop to shop buying anything we could get our hands on, we found ourselves in from of the spa._

"_I need my nails done" I said wiggling my fingers. We stepped inside and began the beauty treatments. After sometime relaxing in the chairs and being pampered a woman came up and introduced herself,_

"_Hello ladies, we're offering a special today on hair coloring, would you be interested?" Mo shook her head and looked over to me. I was silently twirling my locks,_

"_Should I?" I asked. Mo reached out and played with my tresses,_

"_You could go a bit darker?" I thought about it for a moment, maybe a change would be nice. My hair was already light brown; dark brown wouldn't be much of a difference. After a quick deliberation, I agreed and was escorted to the beautician's chair. I patiently waited as the lady got to work; she and Mo kept the conversation going gossiping back and forth about salon on goings. Mo had been a beautician back in Liverpool. __Finally the big reveal came, I nervously turned towards the mirror, and was pleasantly surprised._

"_Rachael this shade is perfect!" Mo exclaimed, I had to confess, it wasn't horrific. It actually looked marvelous._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He and the three kids were seated at a small café along the boardwalk, he slid his sunglasses into place and watched Lily and Will struggle to lick up the steadily melting cones, that was until he felt a tentative tap on his shoulder. He twisted himself backwards to find a nervous teenager twiddling about with her thumbs,_

"_Uhm hi" she blurted out, "Are you Paul McCartney?" Paul chuckled a bit,  
_

_"Yes I am, what can I do for you, love?" She held out a piece of paper and pen, _

"_My name's Grace" She giggled, Paul smiled while he quickly signed it and handed it back to the girl,_

"_There you are, Grace." She shyly muttered a thanks,_

"_Can I ask you a favor?" She said looking at him, he thought it was a bit strange but nodded, the girl turned around and motioned to a shop, 5 chattering, giggly teenagers came flooding out the door,_

"_Can we get a photo with you?" He chuckled and stood up while the girls crowded around him and took a picture. They took a minute to gape at their favorite celebrity before expressing their gratitude,_

"_Girls can you do me a favor?" They all nodded eagerly,_ "_Let's keep my being here a secret, yeah?" They promised and shuffled away giddy from their experience. Paul sat back down to the table and noticed an irritated Lily, and dumbfounded William raising an eyebrow._

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_Daddy took her, Willy, and Holly to get ice cream for brekky. She and Will were sharing a seat at the restaurant trying to unsuccessfully lick up all their ice cream. A weird lady with a camera came over to daddy and started giggling and asking him questions. Then the lady brought her friends over, Lily started to get a little scared, what if these people chased them too? William looked over at her,_

"_Lily, who are those people?" He whispered,_

"_I dunno. What if they chase us?" Williams's eyes shot open and he grabbed her free hand. Daddy kept talking to the girls. Lil got irritated: why couldn't these weird ladies leave them alone? William, on the other hand, was just confused. After a bit dad sat back down at looked over at them, she and Will put their cones down on a napkin and just stared at him,_

"_What?" He asked. Lil was mad. William hopped down off the bench and held out a hand for her, she latched on and jumped down. The pair began walking away in a huff._

"_Where are you two going?" Daddy asked, neither of them answered, they just walked back in the direction of the hotel. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_The older kids looked angry; Will hopped down from the bench and helped Lillian down. They started walking towards the direction of the hotel, _

"_Where are you two going?" He called out, no response came they just continued going. Paul quickly gathered up Holly and threw the diaper bag over his shoulder. _"_Wait up!" Neither stopped they just bolted into the lobby and into the elevator, the doors closed before he could make it in._

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_She and Will made it into the elevator,_

"_What button do we press?" he asked getting down on his knees to act as a step stool for Lillian, she knew exactly which one, she crawled upon his back and pressed it a few times before hopping down, Will got up and dusted off his knees while grabbing her hand. It finally dinged for a final time and the doors slid open. They sped over to their suite, which was thankfully open and ran into their room._

"_Lock the door Willy" He nodded and flicked the bolt. She ran over to the T.V. and switched it on. _

"_Lil, are you mad?" She nodded she was boiling, a tear slid down her cheek. William gave her a hug,_

"_I am too. Those ladies keep following us." Lillian agreed whole heartedly. She thought going on vacation with daddy would be fun. It wasn't. She wanted to go back home. __The pair was quiet for a while that was until a loud knocking came on the door,_

"_Lillian, William, Let me in this instant!" She walked over and kicked the door before pulling William into their bathroom. They got in the tub and sat there in a huddle._

"_I want my mum." William said quietly. She just nodded and held onto him tight. Neither ever wanted to leave._

_Paul's P.O.V._

'_God damn it.' He thought 'Why had they run away?' He waited until the elevator arrived and stepped into it. He nervously bounced Holly; it was taking forever for the lift to get to their floor. Once he arrived he sprinted out noticing their door ajar. He placed the baby down on one of the couches and ran over to the kid's room, their door was locked. He jiggled the door handle,_

"_Lillian, William, Let me in this instant! He shouted. After a moment or so someone kicked the door from the other side. _

"_I'm not joking around. Let me in." There was no answer. He tried the door handle again to no avail. He let out a frustrated huff, he heard the front door open again,_

"'_Ello?" He knew it was Ringo._

"_Ritch I'm over here." He called back. _

"_What's going on? I heard yelling." He asked Paul was frustrated,_

"_I don't know. The kids and I were at the restaurant downstairs and out of nowhere they went mad and ran off." _

"_Who?"_ "_Lillian and William." Ritch nodded, _"

_Well, where are they?" Paul pointed at the door,_

"_They've locked themselves in and won't talk to me." Ritch tried tapping on the door,_

"_It's uncle Ritchie. Lemme in, please." They waited a moment there wasn't an answer. Ritch shrugged,_

"_Well where's the baby?" Paul pointed at the couch behind them._

"_Do you want me to take her? Marianne already has Jason and Zak." Paul agreed, and left Ringo to the baby. Paul attempted bang the door open again,_

"_Please let me in, its daddy." One of the kids threw something at the door, but wouldn't answer. _

_Lillian's P.O.V._

_When Uncle Ritchie had tried opening the door, they were about to let him in, that was until William thought about it, _

"_Wait Lil, if we let him in, then your daddy will come in too." Lillian was surprised at the boy's quick thinking, but earnestly agreed they weren't going to let him in. They were too mad at him._

"_Please let me in, its daddy." Lil was furious; she took off her shoe and whipped it at the door. They crawled back into the bathtub and waited out their stay._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He slumped down in front of the door, he had to get in there. Ritchie walked back into the room,_

"_What do I do Ritch?" He asked, Ringo thought about it for a moment,_

"_We could call downstairs to get someone to open the door." Paul thought about it for a moment,_

" _I don't know, It would attract a lot of attention." The two men sat there for a while,_

"_Rachael is still out with Mo, maybe she can get 'em out." Paul cringed, 'oh god' he thought, 'I can't let Rachael see what happened.'_

"_Ritch you have to do me a favour."_

"_Anything son, what?"_

"_Do not tell Rachael what happened, if she comes back; distract her until I get the kids to come out." He nodded and left the suite._ _Paul tried again,_

"_Lily, Will, please let me in." Still no answer. He had to act quick. He reached for the phone and called for a handyman. The man soon came up and opened the door. Paul walked in, he didn't see either of the kids. The bathroom light was on though,_

"_Are you guys in there?" he asked softly opening the door. There huddled in the tub were Lil and Will sobbing angry tears. Paul felt his stomach drop, _

"_What's wrong?" Neither child looked up. He walked over to the side of the tub and sat down. He reached out to take them out of the tub, both scrambled to the other side out of his grasp. _

"_Why are you crying?" They wouldn't talk. Paul felt his heart break. He got into the tub and sat down, pulling them onto his lap. They sat there for a while,_ "_Are you mad at me?" They nodded. Good now he was getting somewhere,_

"_Can you tell me why?" After a moment Lily spoke up,_

"_Those people keep chasing us." She mumbled quietly. Oh god, that's why they were upset. They didn't know who the photographers or the fans were. They didn't know why they were following them._ _The door swung open and Rachael walked in, she noticed the kids crying and immediately her face took up a worried expression. She knelt down by the side of the tub,_

"_What happened here?" She whispered. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_She and Mo had finished shopping when they arrived back at their suite Ritchie had stopped her in the hallway,_

"_I don't think you want to go in there, love." She was confused,_

"_Why not, is everyone okay?" _

"_Everyone's fine, erm there was just a bit of a mishap."_

"_Mishap?" Ritch shifted uncomfortably to his other foot,_

"_Holly's with Marianne, it's just... the older kids were a bit upset." I pushed past him and went into the room, he threw up his arms in defeat and left to his own room. I heard crying coming from the bathroom, I dropped my bags and ran in, there sitting in the tub was Paul with Lil and Willy in his lap. Both of the kids were sobbing, Paul looked frightened when I rushed in. I kneeled at the side of the tub,_

_"What happened here?" I whispered. Paul winced a bit. I pulled William out of the tub and cuddled him a bit, then brought him out of the bathroom and laid him on the bed, Paul followed suit with Lillian. The kids were crying softly, _

"_What's going on?" I said addressing Paul. He led me outside their room and shut the door,_

"_There was a little situation downstairs." I couldn't read the expression on his face,_

"_Situation?"_

"_Well, some fans came up to get a picture with me, and the kids got scared because they thought they were like those photographers in London. They don't know why they keep following us." I nodded for a moment. It was a perfectly logical reason to be frightened, the kids didn't know who Paul was, or that he was famous._

"_Do you want to tell them why?" He looked apprehensive,_

"_How would we do that?" She thought about it for a moment and led Paul back into the room. Lily was sucking her thumb and Will was messing about with his ears._

"_We need to talk" I told the children. They looked at me sadly. I let out a sigh and crawled under the covers sliding in behind William. Paul did the same on the other side of Lillian. I played with William's hair,_

"_Do you two remember the time Auntie Tessa and I took you to the store to visit Santa?" They nodded,_

"_And do you remember how everyone wanted to get a picture with him?" They nodded again,_

"_Well sometimes people get that way around him." I said pointing at Paul. They looked over at him,_

"_Why?" Lil asked. I glanced over at Paul to continue,_

"_Well love, Daddy plays music, and a lot of people listen to it. So sometimes they want to meet me." Will stopped messing about with his ears and looked up at him,_

"_So you're like the Beatles?" Paul and I shot a look at each other both of us were completely dumbfounded,_

"_How did you know that, doll?" I said pushing the hair out of Williams eyes,_

"_They're on the telly. Lily and I watch them." It took me a minute to realize what he was talking about, I leaned over to Paul and whispered into his ear,_

"_He's talking about the cartoon". It took Paul a minute to figure it out, he chuckled a bit,_

"_Yeah that's exactly who I am." _

"_So you're Paul McCharmhny?" Lillian asked horribly butchering his last name. I let out a giggle,_

"_Yes darling, but I'm daddy really." They both looked Paul over with a bit of apprehension,_ "

_How come we didn't know you before last week?" She asked. Paul gulped a little and looked over at me. I was a bit stunned at the little girl's question, I had no idea how to answer it,_

"_Uhm... well, you see love," Paul looked over at me biting his lip, I instantly took over,_

"_Babe, Daddy was busy and had to go away for a bit. So after a while Daddy and I decided that you should get to meet him." Lil looked over at him,_

"_Are you going to go away again?" Paul's eyes instantly softened at her question._

"_No, I'm not going to go away again. I'll stay with you, how does that sound?" she nodded, and laid back on her pillow. Paul and I looked up at each other and let out a sigh of relief that the awkward situation was over._

"_There's one more thing," I said, the kids looked back over at me,_

"_You two can't run away from us okay? Even if you're scared." They agreed._

"_How about you two take a nap and then we can do something fun later?" They complied without a fight and snuggled back into their pillows. Paul and I crawled out of bed, tucking them in and leaving the room. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

"_Rach, I'm really sorry." He said running his hands through his hair, I just looked up at him and shrugged,_

"_Like I said, it's not your fault." I was a little upset that the kids were crying, but what could I do? This was their new life, I couldn't change that. He came over and reached out for my hair, and felt it between his fingers,_

"_You dyed your hair?" I smiled and nodded,_

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul looked it over, she looked fantastic,_

"_I really like it!" He complemented, she blushed a little and walked over to retrieve her shopping bags, she walked into the bedroom and began unpacking them, he walked into the room leaning against the doorframe. She looked up at him,_

"_My room, pal." He mentally chuckled to himself, he hadn't told her yet. He shook his head, _

"_No its not." She raised an eyebrow. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

"_What do you mean no?" I saw him trying to hide a smile,_

"_We're roomies." My mouth dropped open, _

"_You bastard" I said whipping a flip-flop at him. He ducked out of the way and busted out laughing. What a cheeky git, if he thought we were sharing a room, let alone a bed, he was sorely mistaken. _"_You're sleeping on the couch, Paul." He shook his head,_

"_No Rach, we're roomies." I rolled my eyes, fine I didn't need to sleep, he could have the bed, he was so immature._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_The kids had finally woken up from their nap and wanted lunch. Marianne dropped Holly off and the 5 of us went down to the restaurant. As soon as we arrived we were seated near the back. Holly was on my lap while Lily and Will shared a seat. The waitress came over I ordered for Holly and Will, Paul ordered for himself, As soon as she left Paul leaned over and whispered,_

"_Are you not hungry?" I shook my head. I hadn't ordered anything for myself. I still wasn't hungry, I was even surprised. I hadn't eaten in a few days but if I wasn't hungry I wasn't going to eat, he nodded and leaned back with a strange expression on his face._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He was a little worried, why wasn't Rachael eating? She hadn't had anything to eat since London. She said she felt fine, but it couldn't possibly be healthy to go without food for that long. Will and Lily were across the table discussing silly little kid things and Rachael had Holly in her lap and was playing with the baby. After the lunch had arrived and they had eaten the waitress dropped off the bill, he quickly paid it,_

"_Paul I could have gotten that one."_

"_No love, really it's fine. You didn't even have anything." He had to admit he liked paying for Rachael. It was better than the usual birds he brought out, they usually expected him to pay for everything, Rach, on the other hand had her own money and didn't want him to shell out for anything. _

"_Can we go to the beach?" Lil asked as she and Will hopped down from the chair, he looked over at Rachael and she shrugged,_

"_I don't see why not." The exited the eatery walking across the street to the shoreline. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Paul and I sat in the sand with Holly as Lillian and Will dashed in and out of the water. Paul took out a pack of cigarettes and offered me one,  
_

_"No thanks." He raised an eyebrow,_

"_You don't smoke anymore?" _

"_On occasion, not really so much since Lily was born." He nodded and lit one up taking a drag. We sat watching them splash in the water. I let my mind wander, that was until I thought of my date with Robert tonight, I had to make an excuse for being gone later._

"_I'm going out tonight, so Marianne is going to watch the kids." He looked over at me,_

"_Where are you going?" I shrugged,_

"_I have a meeting with my solicitor." I said looking down at the sand. I was a terrible liar. _

"_What for?" He asked in a worried tone,_

"_To discuss what I'm going to do with William." Paul reached out for my hand,_

"_Do you want me to go with you?" I eased out of his grip, I felt like a major jerk for lying to him,_

"_No, no I'll be fine. You and Ritch can hangout or whatever." He gave me a strange look,_

"_Is there something you're not telling me?" Shit, he knew I was lying. I had to follow it up,_

"_What do you mean?" I asked turning the tables, _

"_Well, I dunno. It's just-"He was searching for the right words, __"Ever since we got here you've been avoiding me. I know you want to take it slow. But really love," He took his finger and lifted my chin so I was looking him straight in the face,_

"_I'd like to give us a chance." I searched his eyes for a moment, he seemed completely sincere. I don't think he understood why I was being so apprehensive about us being together._


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: This chapter gets a bit racy, so if you don't like it please don't read it. I don't want to offend anyone, Thanks :)**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

"_Paul I don't think you get it. I'm not just some quick shag." I motioned towards the kids who were playing on the beach. "Those kids are real. This is real. I have to be mom. But you don't have to be dad. You can go back to your life, no questions asked. I can't." He looked slightly dejected, he just stared at me._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He thought about what she had said or a second. Rachael was right; he could leave tomorrow and never see any of them ever again. For god sakes, he was a Beatle after all. He could have any woman in the world at the snap of a finger. Was he really ready for this? Well, the kids weren't the problem, he adored Lillian and William, and he even loved Holly. He wouldn't be here if he didn't. Being alone was really starting to get at him too. Ever since Jane left it was only himself and Martha at the house. The parties and clubs were beginning to become quite tiresome. A different girl every night also was tedious; they didn't mean anything to him. He and his band had finally established themselves in the studio, so there was no touring. Paul couldn't think of a more perfect situation to bring children and a wife into._

'_Whoa' it finally hit him, 'Paul McCartney the family man.' It had a nice ring to it. He must've been thinking for quite a while because Rachael started up again,_

"_See, it's not just one vacation to Greece, it's for the long run." He was upset that she was having doubts about this,_

"_Really Rachael, I think we can make this work." She looked so miserable; he couldn't help but feel his heart break,_

"_And what if it doesn't? Do you just disappear? You promised Lillian you wouldn't." _

"_I'm not going anywhere, babe. We can do it. Please." She slid on her sunglasses and looked away from him,_

"_I don't know. I'll think about it." She stood up walking towards the kids, she slid on a cheerful face,_

"_Are you guys ready to go?" They ran over to her and grabbed on to either side of her dress. Paul got up and hid his heartbreak by putting on a cheerful face similar to Rachael's.  
_

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_It was nearly 5 o'clock when we arrived back at the hotel. Paul and I wouldn't speak to each other, but we put on smiling faces for the kids. Will and Lil ran off to play in their room and I laid Holly down on the floor in the living room with a blanket for a nap. I went into the bedroom to go get ready for the date. I started searching through my closet for the dress, I heard Paul walk into the room and silently groaned, I really didn't want to talk with him right now, especially after our discussion on the beach. I ignored him and continued to get ready,_

"_So, we're not going to talk about this?" He asked following me around,_

"_Paul, I really don't think there's anything left for us to say. We aren't right for each other, and you know it. You don't have to feel obligated to be with me just because we had a kid together. I've been fine on my own for quite some time now." I really didn't mean for it to sound that harsh. I glanced at Paul, he looked furious. 'Great' I thought, 'Now it's going to be an all out shouting match. At least the kid's room was far enough away so that they couldn't hear us.' He came at me pushing me against the wall, it stunned me a bit,_

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He couldn't believe what she had just said, it wasn't his fault he wasn't there to help her, he didn't even know they had a kid. She was the one who left. She wouldn't even look him straight in the eye, he was completely enraged, he pushed her against the wall holding her there,_

"_Oh, so now you're saying there's been nothing between us all this time? It's not MY fucking fault that YOU left, YOU didn't have to do this alone, YOU could have told me" he yelled squeezing her arms and shaking her against the wall a slight harder than he anticipated._

_She struggled with him, his vise grip impaling her arms._

"_You want to fight? Go ahead, fight me," he said, dropping her wrist. "Let's hear it" he said. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I couldn't believe the way Paul was treating me. He had me up against the wall screaming at me. I thought better of it and kept quiet. I wasn't going to argue with him. I was simply not going to deal with him tonight. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Paul stood there a few moments standing nose to nose with her, his anger still raging at the surface._

"_Well?" He roared. She just stared at him blankly; Paul realized what he had just done. He felt like an arse, he hadn't meant for the argument to escalate to this,_

"_Oh God, Rachael I'm sorry." Someone knocked on the front door, it must be Marianne,_

"_Just wait here, I'll go get the kids, please don't leave. We really need to talk."_

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I watched him sprint out of the room to give the kids to Marianne, my vacant gaze instantaneously fell, and I broke down. I ran over to the bed and began crying into the pillow. I shook from sobbing so hard, I couldn't help it, why was he making this so difficult? I just wanted some time to think about it, and he blew up. I heard Paul tear into the room and race over to the bed. _

"_Sweetheart please stop crying, I didn't mean what I said, and I didn't mean to be so rough." He tried touching me, I immediately squirmed away. I looked up at him,_

"_Please don't touch me." He reached for my hand, I swatted at him,_

"_No Paul. Listen to me. I asked for some time to think about it, and you blew up. That's not fair." I saw a tear escape from his eye, I started crying into the pillow again, I stayed there for a while he laid down next to me and pulled me close, I gave up and let him hold me. _

"_I'm so sorry." He kept whispering in my ear. I don't know what came over me but I finally forgave him, it was both of our faults that we were upset, I was too stubborn and he was too rough. At last I stopped crying, completely drained from this dispute. He looked down at me and began kissing my cheeks where the tears had fallen,_

"_It's okay." I whispered, he stopped and looked me straight in the eye,_

"_Really?" I nodded._

"_But there's another reason right here why we can't be together." I answered sadly,_

"_What?"_

"_We argue too much." I looked down at my hands, "I don't think I could handle that all of the time." He buried his face into my neck,_

"_I'll change, darling. I promise." I nodded, if this was what he wanted. We laid wrapped together for a while, Paul fell asleep and I untangled myself from him. I got ready for my date with Robert, I was going to tell him that I couldn't see him; it wouldn't be fair to Paul. I applied my makeup so no one could tell that I had been crying. I heard the bathroom door open, I turned around Paul came over and wrapped his arms around my waist, he gave a kiss on the cheek while I reached over on the counter to grab my purse,_

"_Go back to sleep, I'll be back soon." He held my hand with a firm grip,_

"_Don't go." He gave me one last kiss on the cheek,_

"_Trust me, it'll be better if I get this meeting over with." He nodded and let me depart. I still felt horrible; he thought I was going to see a lawyer not another man._

_Rachael's P.O.V. _

_I met Robert in the lobby, he greeted me cheerfully, I wasn't in the mood. _

"_Rachael, have you been crying?" I cringed a bit, _

"_Is it really that obvious?" He nodded and gave me a hug, _

"_Rough day?" I nodded,_

"_Let's go get a drink." I relented, what could one drink hurt? We didn't say much during the cab ride there, but we made it inside. _

_Robert and I sat down at the bar making small talk, he ordered us drinks and winked at the bar tender, I was taken aback,_

"_What was that about?" I whispered. Robert tilted his head to the side,_

"_I thought you knew?" He asked,_

"_Knew what?" He blushed a little bit and leaned over_

"_I'm gay." He whispered. My mouth dropped open,_

"_No?" He chuckled,_

"_How drunk were you last night?" I giggled and swatted at him._

"_We were not drunk. Just tipsy. Here I am thinking you were some creep trying to go on a date and thinking you were going to get lucky. I'm so embarrassed!"_

"_Don't be!" He said chuckling, "Alright, I finally got you to smile. Now tell me why you were crying." I sighed and told him about what had happened. While I was telling the story I strategically left out the details that would give away Paul's identity. After I finished Robert looked concerned,_

"_He does love you." I shrugged_

"_What if it doesn't work?" Robert took my hand, _

"_Of course it will!" He was actually giving me some hope. It was nice to talk to Robert as a friend, not a date. We gossiped for the next few hours until he dropped me off back at the hotel,_

"_Let's have drinks again tomorrow night!" I giggled, he was so charming and sweet. I agreed and pecked him on the cheek while making my way back to the room. Things were finally starting to go my way._

_Paul's P.O.V. _

_After Rachael had gone, he napped for a few hours. Around 8 o'clock Marianne had dropped the already sleeping children off. Paul tucked them in and went back to the bedroom to continue dozing._

_Around an hour later he heard the door open. Rachael tiptoed in past him and went into the bathroom._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_When I entered the suite I checked on the kids, Marianne must've already dropped them off because they were sound asleep. I tiptoed past an already sleeping Paul to the bathroom. I stripped off my dress and took off my jewelry before stepping into the hot spray of the shower. I rinsed my makeup off and stood under the water relaxing a bit, and began shampooing my hair. That was until I felt a pair of hands on my hips _

"_Hey Rach" I nearly jumped out of my skin as he stepped in the shower. He surprised me. Paul held on tight pressing himself against my back. I was still rinsing the soap out of my hair,_

"_How did the meeting go?"_

"_Great." I wasn't lying; my 'meeting' had gone extremely well. Robert and I were becoming fast friends. Even though Paul didn't know about him, I figured it would be better to spare him the details than to try to explain it all to him. __He ran his fingers through my hair and once all the soap was gone he began kissing my neck up along my jaw to my mouth.__ He reached up from my waist and cautiously reached for my breast, I let him and he gave it a light squeeze,_

_I had yet to open my eyes and look at him when he said,__ "Turn around, let me see you." He whispered, Paul let go and I turned facing him._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He looked her up and down, she was unbelievable. How had he let her slip away all those years ago? She turned around so he could get a look from behind. She examined every inch of her, she was perfect. He couldn't help but feel remorseful,_

"_I missed you" He whispered quietly while wrapping his arms around her once again. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I knew exactly what he meant. I had to admit I missed him every day since I had left. Every time I looked at Lillian I couldn't help but see him._

"_Me too." We stood there holding each other for quite a while, _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Her warmness and the pressure of her pressed against his front were having a very definite effect upon him. Paul found himself throbbing, achingly hard. He wanted her desperately._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Paul's hardness was pressing against my hip, _

"_Rachael" He groaned gruffly. I started rubbing against him, he leaned over slanting his mouth over mine. His hands roamed my body lingering on my hips and then my breasts. I wrapped my arms around his neck as his kissed down my body, stopping to suck and lightly nibble each nipple. He turned around and shut off the water, opening the glass door while grabbing a towel. He wrapped it around me then picked me up and carried me, dripping wet onto the bed. He gently put me down and positioned himself on top of me. He began kissing me again, I could feel his hardness pressing against my thigh, his fingers found my slit he stroked me softly,_

"_Oh, love," he moaned, "you're so wet. " He positioned himself right outside my opening, and looked at me for the okay, I nodded and he slowly entered me moaning loudly,_

_"God, you're so fucking tight..." He exclaimed hoarsely, and his actions became faster. My breath caught in my throat, I grabbed the bed sheets forcefully. His hands gripped my hips as he drove himself into me roughly and fast, and I soon began whimpering when he slowed down, just to __tease._

_Paul's P.O.V._

"_Do you love me?" he asked in a hoarse, breathless voice. He slammed into her hard and withdrew almost the whole way, then slid in deep again. His breathing was ragged and damp bangs caught on his forehead. His eyes smoldering staring deeply into hers, glittering anxiously. She moaned and clutched him; Paul pulled back again._

"_Tell me you love me," he whispered, holding himself outside of her. She stared into his eyes, her breath coming in tiny, low gasps._

"_I need you," she groaned, her nails digging into his shoulders; that did it for him_

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_Paul had a slightly detached look, _His eyes are distant, his brow furrowed while biting his lip and panting heavily. We both inched closer and closer to our breaking points. All at once, my body locked itself and my back arched uncontrollably. Paul tightened his grip and continued to thrust.

_"That's a good girl. Come for me," he growled, punctuating it with one final drive. He plunged as deeply as he could, pushing my body downward so that he could fill me more. He let out a loud noise vaguely representing my name as he came, he was dripping with sweat as he collapsed on me. I ran my fingers through his hair pushing his damp bangs away from his eyes,he lay there in the crook of my neck, the both of us trying to get our breath back._  
_  
After a few minutes, I felt Paul's strong arm wrap around my waist, pulling me near him. He kissed my forehead and then my lips, _

_"Christ, I love you." He buried his face into my neck and after a bit I felt his breathing slow, while he let out a soft snore. I let out a sigh out relieved that he hadn't heard me answer him, I hadn't told him that I loved him._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He couldn't remember a time that it had ever been that good, it troubled him a bit though, why didn't she say she loved him back? Whatever, she was probably just caught up in the moment. He fell asleep fell asleep in the most satisfied, and relaxed mood he had ever felt. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

I waited until I was certain he was sound asleep, I gently unwound myself from his embrace and left a pillow in my place. I threw on my short black silk robe and snuck out of the bedroom; shutting the door without a sound. I needed some time to think about what had just happened, I looked in on the kids. Will and Lily were sleeping, Holly was half awake, When I peeked over the edge of her crib she kicked her feet and reached up for me. I picked her up and cradled her in my arms, I left the room and made my way to the front door. Thankfully the door was partially open, the floor was ours after all, so we didn't have to worry about any unexpected visitors. The Starkey's door was open a crack I peeked my head in, Mo was sitting on the couch with Jason looking at a magazine,

"Mo." I whispered she put down her magazine and looked around the room, she didn't see me, I called for her again, she finally caught on and rushed over to the door with Jason, She slid out of the room,

"Rachael, how'd the date go?" I led her farther down the hall and into a small niche.

"Mo, I slept with him." Her eyebrows shot up,

"You slept with Robert?"

"No, I slept with Paul. Robert's gay." She stared at me for a moment trying to decide if I was telling the truth or not,

"Wait what happened? Start from the beginning" I quickly went through the nights event's, Mo listened absorbedly,

"And when he told me he loved me, I didn't answer." I finished,

"Do you?" I shrugged my shoulders,

"I don't know. It's all too quick." She nodded,

"Mo what do I do?" It took her a moment to think,

"Well first off, I suppose you did the right thing by not saying it if you truly don't mean it yet. Where is Paul right now?" I pointed back towards the room,

"He's sleeping." She bit her lip,

"I warned you he doesn't take anything slowly." I agreed,

"I'm just scared. What if it doesn't work out?" She looked sympathetic,

"Rach, just give it time, things happen for a reason." I gave her a final hug, we walked back down the hall together,

"Robert and I are going out for drinks tomorrow night, want to come?"

"Did you tell Paul?" I shook my head,

"I told him I was meeting with my lawyers to discuss William." She grinned,

"Rach, that's a great cover up. I'll definitely be there." We gave each other one-armed hugs in order to not disturb the now resting Holly or Jason and returned back to our own suites. I replaced Holly back into her crib and stood there watching her for nearly an hour, letting my mind wander. I felt arms enclose around my midsection,

"I woke up and you weren't there." Paul mumbled groggily into my ear and gave me a kiss on my temple,

"Sorry, Holly was upset." We stood there for a while watching the baby,

"Was Lily ever that tiny?" I smiled a little bit,

"Yeah, for a long time." I leaned down and gave her a kiss on the forehead, Paul reached around and caressed her cheek. Paul took my hand and led me back to the room, carting me into bed. I glanced over at the clock, nearly midnight. He pulled me on top of himself. Paul grabbed the comforter and pulled it up around us until we were enclosed in a blanket nest. He fell back into slumber, I couldn't. I laid there for ages just thinking- occasionally about everything, and every so often about nothing. I watched the minutes tick by on the clock, it was just about 2:30 when I heard Holly fussing, Paul awoke with a start, while I calmly got out of bed, and made a bottle for her. I took her and brought her back to the bedroom,

"Holly?" He inquired partially opening a single sleepy eye.

"Yeah." I leaned back against the headboard feeding Holly, Paul scooted up a tad and played with her toes wiggling them about and trying to tickle them, she gave him a drippy grin and pulled her feet up in the air, I watched him interact with the baby, I had to admit it was pretty charming the way he was with children. After some time Holly tired herself out and fell asleep, I placed her on her tummy between Paul and I. He rubbed her back gently, I reached over to the bedside table and grabbed the telephone,

"Who are you calling?" He queried,

"My sister, it's about 6:00 back home." He nodded and continued rubbing the baby's back. The phone rang and finally someone picked up,

"Hello?" It was Kelley,

"Kell, it's Rachael."

"Hey, I have a question for you." She sounded upset,

"What?" My mind raced anything could be happening over on her end and I didn't know what,

"Can you watch Holly… until April?" I heard her let out a sob. My heart stopped, that was nearly seven months away,

"Kelley, what happened?"

"I can't talk about it, but how is she?" My mind sped through yesterday's events. I decided to sugarcoat it as much as I could; I didn't need her to be any more distressed than she already was,

"She's sleeping right next to me. We had a bit of a scare with her cough, but we got it taken care of. We made it to Greece just fine."

"That's good, thank you so much." Her voice broke again and I heard her weeping.

"What's the matter, are you hurt?"  
"Rach, I can't talk about it but I'm fine, and so is Daniel."

"So you're going to be gone until April? Kelley, you're going to miss Christmas and Holly's Birthday."

"I know, and this is the last time you can call this number because we're going to be moving around quite a bit but I have the telephone number for your apartment, so I'll call when I can okay?" I was still dumbfounded,

"Okay. I love you, be safe alright?"

"I will, miss you like crazy." I was about to hang up the phone until I heard her call for me,

"Rach, one last thing?"  
"Yeah, anything, what?" I was trying to get as much information out of her as possible,

"Tell Holly I love her. Take good care of her for me."

"I will. I promise." Kelley clicked off without another word and I placed the phone back on the cradle. Paul looked up at me,

"What's the matter?" I shrugged,

"I'm taking care of Holly until April." Paul's eyebrows shot up,

"Is your sister okay?" I shrugged again,

"I don't know. She wouldn't tell me what happened. All she told me was that neither she nor Daniel was hurt, and that she'd call as often as she could." I saw the door crack open a bit, Paul and I turned around as Lil and William stuck their heads in the room,

"Mummy we had bad dreams."

"Both of you?" They nodded.

"Could we sleep with you?" I patted the bed and they both ran over as fast as their little legs could carry them. The bed was too elevated for them to crawl onto so they held up their arms as Paul dragged them on. The pair crawled under the comforter and immediately fell asleep. It finally hit me, I had 3 kids. Paul was situating himself between all the little bodies. I fell back into my pillow finally falling asleep.

Rachael's P.O.V.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" Paul asked stepping into the bedroom. We had just returned from out day on the beach. The kids were out in the living room having dinner in front of the T.V., Holly was with Marianne.

"No, I'll be fine. Maureen's coming with me." I pulled out a dress from the closet and took off my bikini. Paul was watching me from the bed, and whistled. I turned around and flipped him the bird,

"You're a perv." He chuckled and walked over,

"You're sexy." I pulled it over my head and walked over to the bathroom, Paul followed me in. I began putting on makeup Paul was leaning against me kissing my neck. I swatted at him,

"Behave yourself." He continued to the point where he was moaning and rubbing against my back,

"Rachael." He groaned,

"Nope, sorry I have to go." He started whining,

"Come 'ead you're not going to leave me with a stiffy, are you?" I giggled a bit,

"Sorry, you did it to yourself."

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul watched as she left the room giving a kiss to each of the kids, and talking to them. He took a moment to calm himself down, then walked out.

"What, no kiss for daddy?" He asked giving her a cheeky smile, he walked over and pulled her into a kiss. He snuck some tongue in as well. That was until he heard the kids,

"EWW!" Lillian and Willy were peeking their heads over the top of the couch, he pulled away and winked at them and went back to a giggling Rachael. He leaned her back and continued kissing her and ended it with a loud smack. He stood her back up and balanced her sending her away with a cuff on the bum,

"See you later" He fluttered his eyelashes at her, she rolled her eyes and gave them a wave before leaving to get Maureen. After she left Paul went back over to the couch and sat down to pick at what the kids hadn't eaten. The three of them watched the telly for a while until Lily spoke up,

"Daddy, we're bored." He looked over at the little girl, she was leaning up against William on the couch messing with his hair. The little boy didn't seem to notice, he was focused on the cartoon that was on.

"What do you want to do?" Lillian bent down to whisper something in Williams ear. The boy tore his attention from the cartoon and started discussing something with her. Paul watched this unfold completely amused, they were like little adults.

"Well?" The children looked up, finally reaching a verdict.

"We want to go on a walk, but we don't want those ladies following us" It took Paul a minute to realize what they were talking about- they didn't want the fans to recognize them and mob Paul.

"Follow me." He said getting up from the couch and walking up and over into the bedroom closet. He reached up on the shelf and pulled down a bag. Paul took out a hat and handed it to William, while taking one for himself. He walked over to Rachael's Closet and got out sunhat for Lily and plopped it on her head. They went out to the front room and threw on sunglasses, their disguises were complete. The three of them left to go down to the boardwalk.

They strolled around for an hour or two before the kids were too tired to continue. He picked them up and brought them back to the hotel tucking them in. He walked over to Marianne's room and got Holly and left her in her crib. He told Ritch to keep an ear out for the kids, he left his wallet down on the boardwalk. Paul walked downstairs and searched around for a while until he thankfully found it. That was until he spotted Rachael and Maureen. The two women were walking back to the hotel dripping off some bloke. Paul was confused, that certainly didn't look like a lawyer. He was about to walk up to them but was instantly enraged when he saw Rachael giving the man a kiss and a hug. They without a doubt they were way too friendly with each other, the thought finally hit him, Rachael was cheating on him.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Like I said before, its a little violent, and graphic.**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

Our night was nearly over, it was about 9:30 and we were right next to the hotel. Maureen gave Robert a hug goodbye and so did I. I saw a shadow staring at them from farther down the boardwalk, but gave it no attention. We made it back to our floor and parted ways, when I arrived in the hotel I checked in on the kids who were sleeping. Then looked about for Paul, he was nowhere to be found. He must've been out to get something, I thought. I settled in on the couch and gazed out the window for a while. That was until Paul came tearing into the hotel, darting about like a madman. He completely passed by me at first, because I was sitting in the dark on one of the couches. He would not have known I was there had he not heard me slightly shift positions. He turned and headed straight toward me.

"Get up!" he roared when he reached me. Paul seized both of my wrists yanking me up into a standing position. "

"What the fuck are you doing to me?" he whispered raucously, shaking me.

He dragged me roughly by the arm into the bedroom, switching on the light while bolting the door behind us. Paul grabbed me by the shoulders slamming me up against the door, his body melding into mine. He was pressing so hard against me I could scarcely inhale.

"Paul knock it off, what's going on?"

"Shut your mouth, Rachael." He held my wrists behind my back with one hand, and then forced my thighs apart with his knee, while his other hand slid quickly up under my dress in between my thighs. His fingers ripped away my panties. He roughly slid his fingers inside of me while his thumb was massaging in slow firm circles.

"You let him do this to you?" he nearly shouted.

"No! Who?" I protested. His fingers continued working on my lower half, so precisely and unhurriedly.

"Does he make you feel like this? Does he?" he snarled.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I saw you with him, Rachael, don't play dumb." He was still forcing his fingers inside of me, it dawned on me- Paul must have seen me with Robert. I pulled away, he came after me and grabbed my wrist,

"Paul it's not what you think." He furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms,

"You're fucking lying and cheating on me." Paul shouted.

"No I'm not, ask Maureen. He's just a friend." He rolled his eyes, and stomped out of the room,

"I'm going out, don't wait up." I broke down instantly, How could Paul think I was cheating? All I had done was gone out for drinks with a friend. It probably wasn't the smartest idea lying to him about my whereabouts, but who was he to control me? It wasn't as if we were married. I stayed in the room until I saw Maureen peek her head in.

"Rach, what happened?" I told her, she looked concerned,

"Ritch went after him, he'll get him back. Are you okay?" I nodded,

"I'll be fine, Mo. Thanks" She left back to her room. I waited a few hours in the bedroom. Alone. It was 12:00 when I finally heard the front door open.

I walked out to find discouraged, slightly frustrated Ringo with Paul's arm slung over his shoulder, trying to keep him upright.

"Don't get tangled up with any birds, Ritch, they drive you loony," Paul slurred. "Just screw 'em and leave. Don't let them get inside your head. If you do, you're fucked."

Richard saw me standing across the room and said, "Paul, that's enough, son."

"No, no, I'm serious, chap," he garbled. "They mess about with your head…" Richard covered Paul's mouth with his hand, and deposited him on the couch.

"Let him talk, Ritch," I said. "He apparently has something to say."

"Oh, there it is, fucking rag." Paul taunted at me.

"'s okay, Ritchie. You can go back to Mo, I can deal with this prick tease witch," Paul said, pointing his finger at me and narrowing his eyes in my direction.

"That's not who I'm worried about." Ritchie said looking at me.

"Go ahead, Richard, I'll be fine." He exited the room quickly. Paul was sitting on the couch holding his head in his hands, he moaned,

"My head." I walked over to the kitchen and got out a cup with some water, I pulled out some Motrin from my purse as well and handed them to Paul. He swallowed the pills while downing the water,

"Rachael," He whimpered, "How could you do this to me, love?" I didn't know how to feel, He looked up at me his eyes were full of tears,

"Paul, I wasn't with him." I explained who Robert was and apologized for not telling him earlier. He was upset, he reached out for me, I didn't let him touch me,

"Where did you go?" He was distressed that I wasn't letting him near me,

"I was mad. So I went out and got drunk. I wasn't thinking straight Rachael, I couldn't stand the thought that you could be with someone else. I'm so sorry." Paul stood up and pulled me into a hug, He kept mumbling "I'm sorry" into my neck,

"Paul, stop apologizing. We both meant what we did."

"Rachael, I love you." He said running his hands up and down my back,

"Do you forgive me?" I thought about it for a moment,

"I don't know." Paul pulled me to the bedroom.

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul laid her on the bed and got on top of her ripping her dress off while he took off his pants, exposing his hard on. He opened her legs, slowly got inside, making sure she was comfortable while slamming in and out of her. He didn't care that he was going so fast, he needed to be inside of her; he needed to make her his own. Rachael quickly came, but Paul hadn't come yet, so he started thrusting into her harder and harder until he almost screamed out with pleasure and moaned her name loudly. His knees buckled, finally giving out from weakness. He collapsed on top of her kissing his way up her body to her soft, warm breasts. Paul stayed there for a while before continuing up her neck on onto her lips.

"So beautiful" Paul sighed, he couldn't believe he almost had lost her, he surely wasn't going to let that happen again then fell into a peaceful sleep.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I awoke to Paul fondling with my left breast. My heart suddenly stopped, and my throat went tight,

"Paul… I forgot to take the pill." He froze and flipped me over to face him,

"What did you just say?" his face was pale,

"We… oh shit." I got up as carefully and sped over to the bathroom. Paul was hot on my tail; he came in behind me and closed the door. I dumped out the contents of my makeup bag shakily searching around for the package. I held it up with trembling fingers; sure enough the pill that was meant for use today and yesterday were there unopened. I sunk down to the floor, staring at the small package. Paul slunk down behind me and held me tight,

"It'll be fine." He tried persuading me. I barely heard him, all I could see was the package and unopened pill slot. Everything around me blurred. What if I was pregnant? Christ, I already had 3 kids to take care of, I wasn't married, and I was in a foreign country.

"This is not my week." I mumbled. I sat there on the cold tile of the bathroom floor with Paul rocking me. A lone tear escaped down my cheek.

Paul's P.O.V.

He couldn't think straight, how could he have been so fucking stupid? He should've used protection. A thought suddenly popped into his head,

"Rach you took the pill for the past couple of days until today, right?" She shook her head and looked at him,

"I forgot the last two days."

"Medication stays in your body for a long time, so we probably have nothing to worry about, honey." She looked at him entirely unconvinced; he had to admit it was pretty dim-wittedrationale. She leaned back into his side and he continued rocking her, another possible baby? How were they going to deal with that? It wasn't that he didn't want another child- hell, he wanted an entire household bursting of little brats with Rachael. It was just that they had just gotten on semi-decent terms, this would change everything.

"I want to go home." She mumbled,

"Rach, don't go." She got up and walked out of the bathroom leaving him on the floor.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I threw all my things into the suitcase, I pulled on an outfit then went back to the bathroom hastily throwing all my items back into my makeup bag. Paul was still in the bathroom,

"You're seriously leaving?" I didn't even answer him. The anger was beginning to rise within me. Mostly at Paul, partially at myself. I walked over to the kids room stuffing all of their things into the three tiny suitcases. I dragged them to the front door, and picked up a phone. I dialed the airport and made sure there would be 4 tickets waiting for us when we arrived. Paul came barreling out of the room,

"Don't go. Or at least let me get my stuff, I'll come with you." I turned towards him,

"Fuck off, McCartney." I spat. "You've caused nothing but trouble since you've been around." I walked back into the room and woke up a drowsy Lily and William,

"Guys wake up, we have to go." They stumbled out of bed balancing each other, I took Holly out of the crib and walked back out into the front room.

"Where we going?" Will asked.

"Home, honey. Get your suitcases they're in the front room." I went back over to the room and called for a bell hop. Within minutes he was there with a luggage cart and loaded it up to take it down to the car. Right before I was about to go Paul reappeared, Lily caught sight of him and wiggled out of the hold I had on her hand,

"Daddy." She said reaching for him, Paul scooped her up. I was furious.

"James Paul McCartney. Put her down right now. She's coming with me." I said through gritted teeth. Paul furrowed his eyebrows,

"She's half mine Rachael. You can't take her." I gave him a warning glance and he didn't back down,

"Paul. Put. Her. Down."

"No," He said, "Come 'ead love, we can talk-" I interrupted

"No Paul. No more talking. Let her down, if you're lucky I'll let you see her again in your next lifetime."

"Lillian come here right now, sweetheart." I said reaching out a hand for her. I couldn't help but feel like a complete asshole, she started crying. The poor kid had just become attached to her father, and now she was being ripped away from him. She wiggled down reluctantly letting go of Paul while running over to William. I took Williams hand while he kept one arm wrapped around Lily. Holly was still asleep in my arms as we walked out of the room. Paul watched us trying to reach us

"Rachael." He screamed but I continued to walk faster. We got to the lobby and over to the waiting car. Lily wouldn't stop howling, she upset both William and Holly. Thankfully the small airport and flight was empty. The plane ride home was horrendous, as soon as I got one child calmed down the next one started up again. We touched down in London and were dropped off at my apartment.

Lily and William hadn't stopped bawling since we had left Greece. I put Holly in her crib and tried talking to the two older kids. They wouldn't have any of it. I figured they would be done and tucker themselves out soon enough, I took all of our luggage and put it away. When I returned to the living room they had their faces buried in the couch cushion sound asleep. I was about to move them, but thought better of it, I didn't want them to wake up and start the shrieking all over again. I sat down on my own bed holding my stomach, I felt extremely sick. What had my life turned into? A week ago I had a near perfect life but now Paul had come and wrecked it and to think, I might be pregnant again with his child. This was my own personal hell.

::::::::::::::

I awoke to the phone ringing,

"Hello?"

"Rac-" I hung up instantly it was Paul's voice. Not five minutes later it rang again. I picked it up and slammed it down, he tried 6 more times I finally picked up,

"Stop calling."I said calmly,

"Rachael, wait just listen. I'm back in London, we need to talk."

"What part of 'fuck off', and 'leave me alone' do you not understand?" He was silent for a moment,

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do."

"No you don't." He was such an idiot, did he really think that I was going to stay on the phone and argue with him?

"Leave. Me. Alone."

"Are the kids are okay?"

"They're fine, no thanks to you."

"Rachael you didn't have to leave, that was your choice. I want to see Lillian."

"No. Goodbye." I hung up the phone and pulled the plug from the wall and went back to sleep.

I woke up again William and Lily had snuck into my bed and were looking up at me with pouts on their faces,

"Why did we have to leave mummy?" I sighed, how was I going to explain this one?

"Doll, sometimes mommies and daddies fight, and they have to leave each other."

"Could we go back now?" I shook my head,

"Sorry, I'm afraid not."

"Why not mum?" William piped up. It took me a minute to realize what he had just called me, mum.

"Babe, you don't have to call me that if you don't want to." He smiled a little bit,

"I want to, 'cuz you're my mummy here, and my other one is in heaven." I nodded and stroked his cheek. After a while they had given up begging and fell back asleep on my bed, I got ready for the day, and took care of Holly. I heard knocking at the door when I answered I instantly knew it was Paul. We stood there staring at each other, he was still dressed in the same outfit as the night before. His eye's were bloodshot and he looked like a complete wreck. I finally snapped out of it,

"Well?" He looked just about ready to cry. I wasn't having it,

"Don't cry, because I don't feel sorry for you. Make it quick, what do you want?"

"You." He mumbled I slammed the door, but he stuck his foot in and pushed his way inside.

"Paul, knock it off and get out, I swear to god if you make the kids upset I'll have you thrown out of here." Tears were rolling down his cheeks,

"I was stupid, please love I'm begging you, give me a chance to explain." I opened the door, and heard pitter-patter footsteps coming from the hallway. Will and Lily came sprinting at Paul.

"Daddy." Lil shrieked. Both her and William threw themselves at Paul's legs. He bent over and picked them up giving them kisses. I was completely pissed off, he really needed to leave. I let them greet each other but I had finally reached my breaking point.

"You're going to stay here right?" She asked. Paul looked up at me and I gave him nothing,

"Actually love, I don't think I can. I have to go soon" She looked stricken,

"Daddy you promised you wouldn't leave again." I shut my eyes, and leaned back against the wall. Paul got down to their level and tried explaining things to them but it was no use, Lillian latched onto him,

"You promised." He whispered something into her ear, and stood up. He walked over to me,

"Why doesn't she come stay with me for the day, I'll try explaining it to her." I gave up,

"You have until noon. I'm picking her up, don't expect this to happen anymore. This is it." Paul turned back to Lily,

"Would you like to come over to daddy's house love?" She smiled and grabbed Williams' hand,

"He's coming too." I had totally forgotten, everything the two children did, they did together, they wouldn't spend a moment apart. Paul looked up at me, and I nodded. He took them to their room to get ready, I busied myself with Holly, when they returned they were set to go,

"Mummy aren't you coming?" William asked, I shook my head,

"No. I'm going to stay here with Holly, honey." Lillian got irritated,

"Mum come with us." I shook my head,

"I'm coming to pick you up later." She started sniffling; Paul looked at me, tilting his head to the side,

Paul's P.O.V.

If someone would have told him he would nearly have a family a month ago he would have called them crazy, he had one at the moment and was on the verge of losing it he thought was he going to go crazy. As soon as Rachael had left he got on the next flight and made it home, the entire time he went nutty, he had convinced himself they had been in an accident and when she hadn't answered his calls he lost it. Now she wouldn't even look at him, this was insane. This annoying, defiant, stubborn, argumentative bird had him going mad, what in the world could he possibly do to make it up to her? He had been a stupid and drunk, couldn't she understand that he was trying to make this work?

Rachael's P.O.V.

I looked away as Paul dragged them out the door. They were reluctant to go without me, but there wasn't a chance I was going so they gave up fighting and left. I tended to Holly and got down to my own business. I put the baby in the pram and took her down to the corner store.

When I arrived home with my brown paper bag I put Holly on the living room floor and went into my bathroom. I sat down and pulled the box out of the bag, a pregnancy test. I knew it was still early, maybe too early to tell whether or not I was pregnant, but I needed to at least try. I read the instructions following them carefully, I couldn't afford a slip-up. I was quivering and pacing around as I waited for the results, 5 minutes felt like an eternity. The time had finally come, I walked with trepidation to the bathroom and picked up the tester.

It was an almost clear positive. My ears rang out and I ceased to continue a reaction. Numbness overtook me as I slumped down against the tub unsure of how to feel. Someone walked into the bathroom,

"Rach?" Paul poked his head in and spotted me on the floor. A similar scene unfolded, he came and wrapped himself around me taking a look at the stick. He kissed my forehead. I could feel him shake, I wasn't much better.

"You didn't come, and I got worried. It's nearly seven."

"Holly" I mumbled trying to get up, Paul kept me in his embrace,

"She's all right. I put her in her cot. She was sleeping."

"Sorry." I muttered, Paul kissed me on the temple,

"There's nothing for you to be apologetic about, we're going to be okay." He picked me up and put me on the bed wrapping the covers around me. I stared blankly into space.

Paul's P.O.V.

He had already fed the kids dinner, they were playing with toys in front of the telly,

"Bedtime." He called, they went to their room and got ready, Paul tucked them in,

"Daddy are you staying?" He nodded and kissed them both. He locked up the flat and turned off the T.V. then returned to Rachael's bedroom. When he walked in she was in the same position he had left her in.

Rachael's P.O.V.

My mouth was dry, and my eyes glazed over. I couldn't blink, or swallow, let alone be aware of anything.

"Love," He said kissing the top of my head, when had he gotten here? My thoughts weren't processing correctly.

"Baby." Was all I could say.

"It'll be okay." Paul told me. I continued staring like an dense fool. Paul stayed up with me throughout the night, when the sun rose I was still unmoved. Paul got out of bed wordlessly to tend to the kids. He returned,

"I dropped them off with Buddy's wife. She's going to watch them for the day." I didn't answer,

"Rach, do you need anything?" His words ran past my ear, but I couldn't respond. We spent the afternoon sitting there, Paul got up a few times to check on things but I stayed put.

"Sweetheart, you need to move a little bit. I haven't seen you shift an inch since last night." I was locked in place. He got up and sat in front of me tucking the hair out of my eyes behind my ear. He tilted my chin up,

"Look at me." My mind was fuzzy I couldn't see him, he snapped his fingers, "Darling, focus." I finally glanced up,

"There's my girl." He got out of bed and came back with a plate of toast and a glass of water. "Bite." He instructed holding up a piece, I turned my face away, he held up the cup, "Water?" I took a sip and swallowed. "There we go, that's good." He coached.

"I've made a doctor's appointment for you. In about an hour." He got off the bed and went over to my closet, he pulled out a dress and walked back over. He stood me up and helped me out of my robe and into the outfit. He zipped it up and took me over to the bathroom. He put down the seat of the toilet putting me down while grabbing a brush. He combed out my hair, and styled it to the best of his ability. He left and came back with sunglasses sliding them on my face.

"Here." He took my hand and we left the building. He put me in the passenger seat of his car. I rested my head against the window, he grabbed my hand stroking it while navigating through traffic. We pulled up to the office, Paul came around my side and helped me out. We got into the office and Paul parked me on a bench, prior to signing us in. Soon enough a doctor came out with a huge beam,

"Mr. and Mrs. Manning, I'm so glad to see you." He guided us to his office, he sat me down and ran a few tests.

"I'll be back in a moment." The doctor left the room, when he returned he was flipping through papers.

"I've got some very exciting news!" Paul's grip tightened,

"It's exceedingly early on, and still a bit too soon to tell exactly but I'm nearly sure you are expecting. We'll need to have you come back in a week or so just to confirm it, but congratulations!" He clapped Paul and the back and shook his hand, he gave me a wave before exiting. Paul and I went back to the car. I continued in my trace,

"Well at least we have an idea of what is going on, darling." He reasoned. We went back to the apartment, a few reporters were waiting outside, they had somehow gotten wind that he was back in town,

"Paul where is the child?" One called out. He ignored them and we went up to the flat. I sat in a chair looking out the window to the ground below. 'Great' was my first clear thought, 'now they're going to mob again.' Paul must've thought the same thing.

"Why don't we stay over at my house tonight, the gates and stuff…" He mumbled. I showed no indifference, He came back with a bag for me and another one for the children. We left down the service entrance and stopped along the way to pick up the children. They got into the car and chattered with Paul about their day. Holly was seated in my lap. When we arrived at the house the children dragged the bags in. Paul took Holly from me to get her inside, he returned and picked me up. He carried me up the staircase and put me in bed. I fell asleep devoid of emotion.

Paul's P.O.V.

The kids ran around the house while he made sandwiches for dinner. After they had eaten and he had taken care of Holly, Lily and William had made a blanket fort in the living room to sleep in. Paul put Holly in the guestroom upstairs so he could hear her at night. The monitor at the gate was ringing nonstop, he turned down the volume, it was the gatebirds. Paul walked outside and plodded over to the gate,

"Listen girls," He said sternly, "I've got a sleeping kid in there, stop ringing the bell." The girls stood there with their arms crossed,

"You've got that whore in there too, dontcha?" One asked popping her gum loudly,

"Go home girls." He turned around and stomped back into the house. He locked the door, and went back into the living room.

Paul's P.O.V.

Once all the children were asleep and accounted for he went back to his own bedroom. He crawled up on the bed to check on Rachael. She was in a fitful sleep. He thought she looked like an angel- her skin was glowing while her dark locks contrasted with the white of the pillow, her eyes were fluttering just a tiny bit she woke up when he pushed the hair out of her eyes,

Rachael's P.O.V.

"How did my girl sleep?" It took me a minute to realize where I was, it came crashing in from all corners of my mind like a tidal wave. I was in Paul's house, in his bedroom. Oh, and the most significant detail, I was almost certainly pregnant. I felt my entire body lock and I started sobbing,

"Please don't cry," He said he got behind me pulling me into him, he held my head against his chest while putting the other protectively around my front with a hand held on my abdomen. "Shush, see we're all fine. The kids are okay, I'm okay, you're okay."

"I'm so sorry." I mumbled countless times through my tears,

"That's enough, there's nothing for you to be sorry about. We got into this together." I couldn't stop though, my whole world came crashing in,

"Baby." I murmured,

"Darling, stop making yourself upset, we have to go next week to the appointment to make sure we really are." I finally trickled down to my last few tears, then I was dried out. He got out of bed and reached for me scooping me up,

"Come with me to the music room, I don't want you to be alone." He took me to the room and stuck me on the couch; he got to the piano quietly working something out. About an hour passed and I heard Holly fussing, Paul glanced up at me as I left the room- he was probably surprised that I had moved on my own. I changed the baby's diaper, and took her with me downstairs to make a bottle. I was slightly amused when I found Lily and Will in the living room, they were huddled together below a blanket fort. I grabbed a bottle from the bag in the hallway then took it to the kitchen to get it ready; after it was warmed up I took a seat on one of the chairs from the kitchen table. Holly took to the bottle and was happily eating while studying me with her large brown doe eyes,

"Hey." Paul whispered, he knelt before me resting his hands on my knees, I looked up in acknowledgement and continued with the baby.

Paul's P.O.V.

He watched Rachael feed Holly, he couldn't help but notice how broken she looked. Her eyes were semi-glazed over, and her lips were pursed, even through that she was taking care of the baby. When Holly had finished eating she stood up and maneuvered her way around him and upstairs.


	12. Chapter 12

**_A/N: Thanks for the reviews, keep 'em coming! :)_**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

I put Holly back on the guest bed and surrounded her with pillows, Paul followed me the entire time, I wasn't really aware of him though. I was in my own world in a way, this must be how people feel when they've gone mad. I went back to the bedroom and skulked on top spreading out. I put a hand on my stomach he scooted in next to me resting on his side while looking up at me,

_"What're you thinkin' of pretty girl?"_ The hell if I knew, I should've been thankful, some people couldn't even get pregnant, and here I was with 2 kids of my own, a 3rd one to take care of, and an almost certain one on the way. I didn't know how to feel though, I suppose I was scared, 4 kids would certainly be a lot to deal with, and frankly the world was watching I doubted I could handle that. I turned away from Paul and laid down on my pillow. He scooted closer, and wrapped an arm around me, I felt his hand slide up under my dress and rest on my abdomen.

I woke up to the phone ringing, I didn't even open my eyes. Paul reached over and grabbed it from my side stretching it do he could lay back down,

_"'Lo?"_ He listened for a while,

_"No, we got back in last night. Ritch and Mo are still there." _

_"You've got to be pullin' my leg here." _

_"I don't know, we had a bit of a rough night."_ He huffed,

_"Only if she's up to it, I'm not pushing for it."_ I listened to the one sided conversation,

_"No, don't do that. I'll call later."_ He reached over and hung up the phone, Paul leaned down and kissed the tip of my nose, my eyes opened slightly. Paul gave me a small grin, his eyes were droopy and sleep-stricken,

_"Good morning."_ I turned my head a bit looking out the window, it was still dim outside,

_"It's not morning."_ I murmured,

_"Ah lass, you're right. Go back to sleep."_ I shut my eyes and he pulled me beneath his chin.

I woke up again, this time rain was pinging against the window, when I shifted Paul's eyes snapped open. It took him a minute to rejoin the living world. We stayed there for a while, just keeping still, Paul broke the silence,

_"That was Mal, Alistair and Neil who called."_ I listened,

_"They wanted to know if we could do a press conference to explain what's goin' on. Quiet the tabloids, you know?''_ He put a hand on my cheek and stroked it,

_"What do ya think?"_ I shrugged,

_"Do I really have an option?"_ Paul smiled forlornly, and shook his head,

_"Neither do I."_ I shut my eyes,

_"It's nothing t' get worked up over, all they want us to do is answer a few questions, and smile for the camera."_

_"What about the kids?"_ He outwardly cringed,

_"Mal wants them there, they don't have to talk though."_ I sighed,

_"When?"_

_"This afternoon."_

_"Where?"_

_"Hotel, downtown."_

_"Fine."_ He kissed me on the cheek,

_"You're not feeling well, are you?"_

_"Not especially."_

_"Are you hungry?"_ I shook my head,

_"Tired?"_ I shook my head again.

_"Sad?"_ I didn't move. My eyes were closed but a tear escaped.

_"Let's be happy for a little bit okay?"_ I nodded, he rocked me, _"See, it's not so hard." _

I got up and got another dress from my suitcase, I went into the bathroom. A wave of nausea immediately overtook me, I knelt in front of the toilet bowl coughing audibly. Paul jogged in and held my hair back, I retched and fluid came spewing up. When I was finished I slumped back on my heels before standing up, I wobbled a bit and Paul steadied me. He picked me up and put me on the counter then turned to the shower turning it on, when the water was warm enough he stepped back and helped me out of my clothes and into it,

_"Whoa, wait just a moment."_ He stood me still and his hand went to my ribcage,

_"You're way too thin, I can see your bones."_ He touched his fingertips to them and pressed down a bit,

_"Why haven't you been eating?" _I shrugged,

_"Not hungry."_ He pursed his lips together,

_"Yeah, well, that changes right now. Take your shower then come downstairs we need to get some food in you."_ He let me go and watched me enter. I heard the door shut as he left, I pressed my own fingertips to my ribcage, when had this happened?

Paul's P.O.V.

All he had to do was make it through this day without falling apart. When he went downstairs Lily and William had moved out from under the blanket fort and were currently snuggling against Martha he chuckled a bit, this house surely came alive with a family- even if that family was somewhat broken to a degree. Paul put on toast and readied tea, he still couldn't believe he hadn't noticed it before, sure Rachael was slim, but now she was way too thin. He set it out on the table and walked over to the telephone, he had nearly forgotten to ring his own family about what was going on,

_"'Lo?"_ He recognized it was his brother Mike. Him and his wife Angela were staying at the house Paul had bought their father, they were recently married,

_"Mike, its Paul."_

_"Hey son, care to explain what's going on? Da's not pleased."_

_"Listen, I'll call to explain it tomorrow, we're doing a press conference later today, watch the news or whatever."_

_"Alright lad, do you want to talk to dad?"_

_"Is he upset?"_

_"Ehh, a bit. More confused, like really."_

_"Put him on."_ Mike handed the phone to his father and explained the situation carefully leaving out that Rachael might be pregnant again.

_"And so, now we're going to do a press conference, to sort this all out." His father grunted,_

_"Da, I'll bring them up next week, okay?"_ His father grunted again.

_"Alright, call you soon."_ Paul hung up the phone and noticed Rachael walk in with Holly,

_"There's me girl. Feeling better?"_ She nodded,

_"Giv'er here."_ He said reaching for Holly. Rachael handed him the baby,

_"Good, go eat. I made brekky."_

Rachael turned away and he watched her pick up a slice and take a bite. She seemed to be a bit better, not as disconnected. She had her hair done, makeup finished and she smelled of perfume- this was a step in the right direction. He got the baby a bottle and fed her, Rachael picked up her plate and was about to throw it in the sink,

_"Hey wait, have another piece. One slice of toast is barely breakfast."_ She turned back towards him,

_"I'm fine."_ He insisted further,

_"I know you're perfect, just do it for me?"_ She sighed and took another piece. She finished half of it and threw it out. It was better than nothing. Paul gave the baby back to her and went out to get the older kids ready.

_"Wakeup guys."_ The kids sat up petting the dog,

_"Mmm?"_ William muttered,

_"We have a busy day today, okay?"_ They nodded and pushed past him to get a piece of toast,

_"Whad're we doin'?"_ Lil asked munching on her food, Rachael answered him,

_"You're going to come with daddy and I today, we're going to answer some questions."_ She raised an eyebrow,

_"Why?"_

_"Erm, because some people want to get to know you?"_

_"Who?"_ Paul watched Rachael smile a bit, this excited him it was the first time he had seen her react to something in the last 24 hours, even if it was to give a half-hearted smile to the kids.

_"So many questions. Alright well, I think daddy can explain this better than I can."_ The kids looked up at him, he gulped a bit,

_"You remember those people who followed us with cameras?"_

_"Yeah."_ They both answered,

_"We have to go talk to them."_ They both had dumbfounded expressions on their faces,

_"Why would we do that, that's silly."_ Paul nodded,

_"Yeah I think so too, but if we talk to them they might follow us a little bit less."_ The nodded understandingly when they were done they followed Rachael to get ready.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I put on a happy, smiling face for the kids. Lily chose her ladybug dress and William wanted his black sweater. I styled Lillian's hair,

_"You need a hair cut lady!"_ I exclaimed, I took a look at William's as well,

_"You too buddy boy."_ He giggled and shook his head. I was going to have to call Mo about giving them a haircut when she came home.

_"Mum, are we staying here or going home?"_ I kept my smiling face on, inside I broke down again,

_"How about if you spent some time here with daddy, and then you come and spend some time with me?"_ She looked a bit down and decided not to press the subject,

_"Kay."_ I tickled her a bit to try to pull her out of her mood, after a minute she couldn't resist and started laughing, Paul came in the room with a cleaned up Holly in a onesie.

_"Ah, here's Mummy,"_ Paul exclaimed. _"See how pretty she looks! I've got the best lookin' gals there are, right in this very room!" _

I gave him a partial smile. It was nice that he was making an effort, but I still wasn't completely okay in the head. I got to work on William's hair. Lily ran over to Paul and he took her on one knee, while cradling Holly in the other arm. William squirmed a bit when I took a comb to his head, when I was finished he got up and shook his head until it was back into his regular messy appearance, he gave me a wink and a smirk. I let him go and retrieved coats for the kids,

_"Go get in the car, okay?"_ I asked Will and Lil. They went out the door and climbed in, thankfully no gatebirds were hanging about due to the weather. I swaddled Holly in a blanket, I felt his hand on my shoulder,

_"Rach?"_ I picked her up and turned around,

_"What?"_ My face was blank again, I didn't have the kids to act like I was okay for. He took in a breath and sighed a little,

_"You're beautiful, and I love you."_ He attempted to kiss me, but I turned my head to the side. Paul settled for a peck on the cheek and took me out to the car. He took the drivers seat, I had Holly in my lap. Lily and Will chattering away in the back seat. When we arrived at the hotel it was teaming with press, Paul pulled in through a back entrance, Lily and Will were asleep. Mal and Neil met us motioning us in from a service entrance, I got out with Holly; Paul took Lily and Will.

_"'Lo."_ Mal greeted giving me a peck on the cheek Alistair and Neil did likewise. Paul came up from behind,

_"They didn't make the trip."_ He chuckled,

"_Give 'em here, you, Rachael and the baby can go to the table they'll say with us."_

I gave thanks as Neil and Mal took a kid each for themselves, all I had to do now was worry about Holly. Alistair led us to the room, once we walked in everything exploded, reporters were trying to get our attention from all angles. Paul grabbed my hand and led me to the table Holly sat on my lap with a hazy grin on her face, unsure of what to make of the situation.

_"Alright, alright! One at a time!"_ Alistair hollered. The press quieted quickly. A small, thin man spoke up first.

_"Paul, I'm asking a question for the majority of us, who is the child on Ms. Belter's lap?"_

_"Rachael's niece. Next."_ I had on a phony smile, Paul was going to answer most of the questions. A weedy red haired man stood up,

_"Mr. McCartney, who are the other children you walked in with?"_ Lily and Will had woken up and wiggled free from Mal and Neil's hold, they ran up on stage to Paul crawling on his lap. Once they were seated comfortably Paul grinned,

_"Ask them."_ Lillian leaned forward and gave an the signature McCartney nod and wink, the reports awed and laughed at her antics. The girl leaned forward and pulled the microphone closer to herself,

_"I'm Lillian."_ She pointed over at her companion, _"And he is William."_ Then she looked over at my lap and pointed at the baby, _"And she is Holly."_ Then sat back with a smirk on her face, Paul tried to stifle a laugh, the reporter leaned forward again,

_"And is Paul your daddy?"_ She looked a bit irritated,

_"**Yep,** what of it, sonny?"_ I was surprised at what the five year old had just said. The room busted out laughing, Paul leaned down and whispered something to her.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was shocked but completely enthralled by what the child had just said. This tiny girl had just managed to capture the reporters' hearts, and embarrass the nosy man in a matter of seconds,

_"Where did you learn that, love?"_ he whispered leaning down to Lillian's ear,

_"Uncle Ritchie."_ She answered quietly,

_"Naturally."_ Alistair had managed to settle everyone down before they could continue, a man with a bowler hat plastered on his head stood up,

_"Paul, which child is yours?"_

_"All of them at the moment."_ He replied shortly,

_"But which one biologically?"_ Paul scoffed,

_"I think you can figure that one out, mate."_ Another stood up,

_"Mr. McCartney, are you and Ms. Belter involved?"_

Rachael's P.O.V.

My stomach sunk everyone knew what he meant,

_"Yeah, we have a kid together."_ Paul answered effectively sidestepping the question.

_"What about Jane?"_ Paul shrugged,

_"What about her?"_ Alistair shouted for the next question, a woman stood up,

_"Who is the boy?"_ Paul looked down,

_"Would you like to answer the nice lady's question?"_ Will nodded Lily pulled up the microphone for him,

Paul's P.O.V.

_"I am William. Lily said so."_ The reporters snorted with laughter again. Paul couldn't believe how charming, and cute the kids were being, this made his job a hell of a lot easier. A man with a thick tweed blazer and a rather bulbous nose took a turn,

_"Do you think having children will affect the Beatles?_

_"I don't see why it should. Both Ringo and John have kids, they're alright musicians."_ They then turned in on Rachael, she looked serene,

_"Ms. Belter, what do you think of the media attention?" _She shrugged,

_"It comes with the territory I suppose."_

_"How do you feel about the press?"_ She gave him a smile,

_"How do you feel about it?"_ Neil was howling with laughter, he had to excuse himself.

_"Are there wedding bells in the future?"_ Paul quickly stepped in and ended the interview by ushering the family off the stage. They were escorted back to their car and they quickly drove off, they were halfway back into the town when Rachael turned to him,

_"Drop us off at my flat."_ He was shaken, she had dropped her phony press smile.

_"Why did you forget something?"_ She shook her head.

_"No. I have to call movers to bring my things to Tessa's."_

_"Honey, I'm sure that can-"_

_"Home."_ He relented, Paul checked the rearview mirror to make sure Lily and William weren't paying attention,

_"Why don't you come and stay with me?"_ She shook her head,

_"No."_

_"Why not?"_ She looked out the window,

_"I've got to move on with my life, get a job. Stuff like that."_ Rachael looked wholly withdrawn,

_"Can we at least discuss it?"_ He countered

_"There's nothing to talk about."_ She droned. Paul took her hand,

_"Love, this has been a rough week, why don't we just take a break? You know just hangout for a while and sort out everything."_

_"That's why you're dropping me off at home."_ Why did she have to be so god damned difficult?

_"Fine, can I at least help you?"_ She shrugged uncaringly,

_"Do what you want, I'm not in charge of you."_

He parked close enough to the door so that they wouldn't have to run through all the puddles- much to Lil and Willy's disappointment. When they got up to the flat, Rachael completely ignored him. Actually, she ignored everything, she got on the phone, called movers, called her lawyer, and called someone named Nan.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I kind of hate this chapter, it's just sad.**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

The movers were on their way, a meeting for my lawyers was set up, and Nan was watching all of the kids tomorrow. I then called Alf, he dropped off some cardboard boxes faster than a wink. I got them from the hallway and dragged them to my room. I neatly started folding everything from my closet, making sure I left all of Phillip's things untouched. I went over to Lillian's room and did the same. I figured I could leave all the appliances, and any common-goods, Tessa surely had the same things left in her apartment. I worked efficiently and rapidly making sure not to miss a single item. I had 13 neatly stacked boxes in the front room,

"Don't lift that, I've got it." I shot him a look, I was most likely pregnant, not an invalid. I then went to the closet and cleared out the rest of our things. 3 moving men came, I directed them what to take, and what to leave. They had dropped it off on the floor below for me. I called for the kids,

"Let's go guy's, we're moving to William's house." Lil and Will rounded the corner,

"You didn't forget anything did you?" Lily asked,

"Nope. Where's Holly?" Paul came in cradling her. I ignored him and reached for the baby, he reluctantly gave her up. I made sure the 4 of us made it to the elevator, I couldn't honestly care less about Paul at the moment- if he wanted to tag along, I wasn't going to speak to him. When we got into Tessa's flat. I let out sigh of relief, at last something was familiar. Will and Lily were running around, and I put Holly down in the Living room. Tessa had 2 extra guestrooms where Lillian and I would take up residence. I decided that I would leave Tessa's bedroom untouched for right now.

"Do you need help?" Paul offered,

"No. I'm fine." I took a box down from the stack,

"You really shouldn't be doing all that heavy lifting." He warned,

"Lemme do it for you." I disregarded him and did it anyways. It took nearly 4 hours' but everything was finally settled.

Paul's P.O.V.

Rachael wordlessly managed to pack up her and Lillian's lives and move them a floor below with little effort. Paul offered numerous times to help, but each time she passed him by with no acknowledgement. He chased around the older kids while they showed him where everything was. Paul didn't like where he and Rachael were at, they were basically living around each other no matter how hard he tried to change it. Rachael put the kids to bed, William and Lillian had opted to stay in the same room, the pair were joined at the hip. Holly was in her crib in Lillian's unused designated room. Paul at last found Rachael sitting up against the hallway wall looking through papers, he walked over taking a seat next to her.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I was looking through William's custody papers, it was all so confusing. Too many legal stipulations, and political jargon. I decided to focus on things I could change, not things I couldn't change. I couldn't change the fact that I had 3 little people depending on me, or that my friend had died, or that I was most likely expecting a child from a man who I was in a difficult situation with. I could change where I lived, my job, William's future and my own. I had to get on with my own life. I felt Paul squeeze my knee,

"I'd like to stay here tonight, if that's alright with you?" I shrugged uninterestedly and nodded towards the couch. He sat there for a long time looking at me, I wouldn't look him in the eye. After a bit I got up and returned to my own room, I hear the T.V. flick on from the living room.

When I woke up in the middle of the night, I was crying. I didn't know why, or how. I just was. I heard the door creak open,

"Rach?" It was Paul.

"I uhm… Are you okay?" I stayed silent, he didn't move from the doorway, I fell asleep again.

Paul's P.O.V.

He couldn't sleep, he wanted to talk to Rachael, he had heard her crying when he asked what was wrong she didn't answer. He fought the urge to run in and comfort her, he heard another sob, he couldn't take it anymore. He broke down himself. He knew if he tried to go in there she would surely ignore him, he couldn't take that.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I got up at 5 a.m. to get the kids ready, Paul was sleeping on the couch, I made sure not to disturb him on the way out. Holly was in the pram and Lil and Will were holding onto each side as we went over to Nan's house, a reporter caught up with us,

"Give it a rest please." I pleaded. The man finally took all the pictures he wanted, Will and Lily had made faces and stuck their tongues out at him, _I didn't stop them, they were dealing with it the best that they could. After dropping them off, I went over to the lawyers, we discussed William and the current living situation. They had told me that Tessa had left a lump sum of money to me._

"_How much?" The legal team deliberated quietly, then passed me a figure on a piece of paper, I took a look, and my mouth dropped,_

"_You're serious?" They nodded. I couldn't believe it. 19 million, left entirely to me to care for William. The solicitor's sent me off, they were going to set up a trust fund to protect the wealth, where in the hell had Tessa gotten all this money? We were both independently successful, but hell, I only had 2 million in the bank. I shrugged it off, one way or another someone would figure the financial stuff for me. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He woke up to an empty house, and spent the day trying to clear his mind. At around dinner time the door opened and Lily and William had run in, Rachael wasn't far behind with Holly. The kids chattered excitedly about their day's and Rachael put the baby to bed. Lily and Will had stayed up a bit longer, but had passed out the second their heads touched the couch cushions. Paul tucked them into William's bed._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I had done it. I had quit my job. There really wasn't any point of continuing, the reporters were going to hound me mercilessly, and I didn't want to be at Abbey Road Studios. The pieces of my life were slowly coming back together. Paul called me from the kitchen,_

"_Rachael?" I walked in and raised an eyebrow,_

"_Have you eaten yet?" I was starting to walk out but he grabbed my hand,_

"_No, no, no, Love. You're eating." He pulled out eggs from the fridge and cooked an omelet He slid the plate in front of me,_

"_Eat." I was angry,_

"_I don't need you to take care of me." I stated firmly before walking out._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He took the plate and followed her,_

"_You're eating." She ignored him and went to fold clothes from the dryer,_

"_Rachael, I'm not kidding. You don't have to talk to me, but you do have to have something." She sighed and gave up taking two bites before pushing the plate away. Better than nothing._

"_There's my girl. Thank you." She pushed past him and went to her room. Paul was fed up with her attitude, all he was trying to do was make sure she was healthy; she acted like it was a crime. He trailed her into her bedroom, the site he saw broke his heart. She was standing in front of the full-length mirror crying, _

"_Honey?" She was startled when she heard his voice; she turned around and looked at him for a moment then shook her head and locked herself in the bathroom. He let out a breath, he was sure as hell getting sick of locked doors._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I didn't know what to think, or where to run to. I scooted myself up on the bathroom counter and hugged my knees close, there was a soft tapping on the door,_

"_Lemme in, please." I sure as hell wasn't letting him anywhere. He had completely messed up my life. _

"_No." I heard Paul huff,_

"_And why not?" _

"_Because it's my bathroom." I knew that was probably the worst reason ever made up, but I was past the point of caring. His side was silent, I was rather relieved, maybe he was finally going to leave me be. I heard a sharp sting of metal being forced apart, the door popped open. Paul walked in looking quite pleased with himself,_

"_How-" Paul held up a bobby pin, "Oh." The tears were still falling; I had become accustomed to their presence. He leaned against the door with his arms folded; I buried my face in my knees. After some time I felt his arms wrap around me, I wiggled free he jumped up on the counter as well. _

"_What am I going to do with you?" He sighed._

"_You can leave me alone."I responded softly._

"_Nope. I'm not going t' do that." He hopped off the counter and stood in front of me. He slowly pulled my legs down so that I was sitting regularly then leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. He quietly took his fingers pressing them to where my ribs were, obviously not pleased that he could still feel them, then his hand slid down and rested on my stomach,_

"_You really don't even know how much I love you, do you?" Paul waited a moment for my response, when he got nothing, he continued. "I love you enough to know that what I did was wrong. I love you enough t' know that you're a fantastic mum to both William and Lillian… even to Holly. I love you so much that I nearly died when you left… again. I've seen you the past few days and you're not the same person. You don't eat, you don't smile unless you're around the kids. Even then I can tell it's a complete act. You worry about everyone except for yourself, and you're never happy. You won't let me near you, not even to help out. Where did the girl I fell in love with go?" He finished his rant and looked up at me, I was unaffected. I pushed his hand away and scooted off the counter._

"_She left you in Hamburg." He caught hold of me and held on tight, I was no match for him, he was bigger, and stronger than me._

"_Where can I find her? I miss her; it seems like forever since she's been gone." I was pissed,_

"_Right around the corner of 'Fuck' and 'Off'. I can take care of myself, McCartney." I could feel him chuckle sadly,_

"_There's that wit I remember." His hands were wrapped around my ribs,_

"_And no, you can't take care of yourself. I've seen you try and you've done a particularly shitty job at it."_

"_Let me go." She shook his head and tightened his grip,_

"_No. Not until you at least let me speak to you like a normal human being. I'm sick of living around each other." I let myself go like a limp noodle. He wasn't going to last, he would have to give up eventually._

"_Listen, darling. I'm just as much of a stubborn arse as you are. I can keep going as long as you want. But if you would, I'd like to talk with you and work through this."_

"_There's nothing to talk about."_

"_Nothing to talk about?" His voice was dripping with sarcasm, "If you haven't noticed, we have three kids out there."_

"_No. You have one kid out there." Paul sighed,_

"_Rachael, you bloody well know that William and Holly are just as much mine, as they are yours."_

"_They're not, actually." I retorted._

"_Oh really? Is that why William called me 'daddy' today?" I was instantly silent. He had proven a point._

"_Well, at least you've finally got it. I'm going to let you go, but I swear to god I'll come after you if you try to make a break for it." He slowly let his grip go, watching carefully. I stepped back and opened the door. I walked evenly over to my bed crawling across it and situated myself under the covers. I didn't need any of this, he was probably lying just to get to me. Paul followed me and leaning against the headboard._

"_Well, I didn't have the heart to tell him otherwise." He was blinking fiercely,_

"_It just slipped out of him naturally, I truly believed it myself." I was watching him, he looked down at me,_

"_And as for Holly, Christ." He coughed a bit, "She's perfect in every way. I was holding her back while we were in Greece and I couldn't help but think t' meself, 'God this must've been what Lily was like, and I missed that'. And now you know, the situation we're in. And I know you're scared, hell, I am too." _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He'd never done this, putting his heart out on his sleeve. Damn, if he had actually known what was going to make Rachael happy he would've done it a lifetime ago. She was just about as broken down as he was. He literally dragged her on top of himself, she just rested her chin on his chest and stared down her nose at him, neither knew what to make of the situation. She wasn't fighting him anymore. She just gave up, he longed for the chance to kiss her, and make love to her, but that was exactly why they were here. _

"_The doctor's appointment is tomorrow morning, so we'll know exactly what to expect." She just fixated her amazing eyes on him. He wanted to get lost in them, throw away the rest of the world. She put her head down and rolled off. They went to sleep unsure of what tomorrow would bring them._


	14. Chapter 14

**_A/N: A bit of fluff in this chapter. Reviews please? I want to know what you think! :)_**

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_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I tossed and turned throughout for around an hour, I gave up and I left the room. I couldn't stand to be in the same bed as him. Thoughts blazed through my head, none of them made a trace of coherent sense. What if I was pregnant? Where did I go from here? One thought struck me in particular during then night like a knife to the heart- I should probably call Tessa and ask for advice. Then I coldly remembered what had happened. At around 1:30 I heard Holly fussing. I hurried into her room and scooped her up, _

"_What's the matter?" I crooned; she stopped when she heard my voice. I was actually surprised, the door opened and I turned around. Paul was standing there with a bottle and a startled expression on his face._

"_I didn't know you had her, I was just…." He halfheartedly held up the bottle, "I heard her. I thought you were sleeping."_

_Paul's P.O.V._

"_Mm." It really wasn't quite the answer he had expected, or he was looking for. _

"_Well if you want me to I could—"He reached out for Holly. Rachael looked reluctant for a moment then surrendered the baby to him. He took Holly and cradled her carefully,_

"_Hey, Hol's." He whispered, even in the darkened room he could see the baby had her eyes fixed on him with a drippy grin. He had her in the nook of his arm and she was earnestly working to finish the bottle. _

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I watched him the Holly for a moment and then made my exit to the living room. I flipped on the T.V. and finally settled for an oldie; not much went on, I just stared at the screen with my legs pulled up to my chest._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He followed Rachael into the sitting room with the baby. He took a seat on the lounge chair parallel of the couch. Holly had finished half of the bottle and decided to be done. She was now snuggled right up on his chest lying on her tummy, she was attempting to push herself up to look at his face in a wiggling new baby fashion. Paul remembered that Rachael had told him she was born in early February, she had to be at least around 7 months old at the moment. The baby was still giving him the same lopsided smirk that pulled at his heart strings; he had to admit, she was one hell of an cute kid- felt like a heater too, the onesie that she was in gave him the feeling he had a melted bag of butter sitting on his chest, not that he minded though. Paul had taken quite a liking to the little one._

_He took a momentary look back over at Rachael, she was absorbed in the movie on the telly. It drove him mad that she was caught up in her head. If only she would say something. He had nearly pulled his heart out and written it down for her an hour ago in the bedroom; and all she did was watch. Whatever, she'd come around soon enough; all she needed was a moment to think._

_He glanced down his nose at Holly, she was still attempting to push herself up. She gave up after a while and inched her way up closer to his face. She took a petite balled up fist and placed it on his lips. Paul gave it a little kiss, she looked delighted and pulled back to do it again; the pair continued until she couldn't hold herself up anymore. After a quick rest, she was at it again. Paul didn't mind the little game at all, it was rather adorable. She grabbed for his nose and held on, Paul let out a breath, and she beamed even wider. Holly then took both of her tiny hands and placed them on either side of his face, he quickly puffed out his cheeks. Holly smiled and tried to mimic him, it was no use all she did was drool on herself. Paul pulled at the collar of his white t-shirt and wiped off the dribble. She had finally settled down and gone back to sleep. He watched her little lips move, it looked as if she was talking to the angels; she certainly was sweet enough. _

"_Rach, look." He called out, she looked back at him,_

"_What?" He nodded down towards the baby, Rachael got up for a better look,_

"_She's talking to the angels, right?" He asked, she smiled a bit,_

"_Yeah, my mom used to say that too." He was surprised at that she was actually talking to him. But another thing struck him,_

"_You've never told me much about your family." She shrugged and went back down to the couch,_

"_There's not much to say." Paul got up with Holly and sat down next to Rachael on the couch,_

"_I'm sure there is. Where did you grow up?" She looked down at Holly,_

"_In Chicago, great city it is." Paul chuckled,_

"_And what was your family like?"_

"_Well my mom and dad were great people. Mom was a nurse before she married my dad, and my dad was a businessman." Paul chuckled, _

"_So how in the world did you find yourself living in London?"_

"_Well, you know the modeling thing. Then I had Lillian, and my parents… they passed away. Tessa was already here so, she told me to get my ass over here, and that's exactly what I did." She had a small smirk on her face._

"_What were your parents names?" She looked conflicted for a moment, and looked down at the baby._

"_Mom's name was Helen and dad's name was Ron- I mean Mike." He was confused for a moment,_

"_What did you say?" She looked up at him with a startled expression on her face,_

"_I said dad's name was Mike." Her face was completely pale. _

"_No you didn't you said Ron." It finally hit him, "Your dad's name wasn't Mike was it?" She didn't say anything,_

"_Is your father who I think he is?" She let out a sigh,_

"_Who do you think he is?"_

"_Ronald Belter." Ronald Belter was easily one of the most talked about men in the 50's and well up into the 60's. He was some business mogul who was assassinated right here in London._

"_You're right." He was pretty impressed, _

"_Why didn't you tell me?" She shrugged,_

"_Didn't think it was important." He scoffed, and took her hand,_

"_Of course it's important. That's your family." She let off a weak grin,_

"_They adored Lillian you know? Could never get enough of her, I swear they would have stolen her from me." She giggled a bit. _

"_What about your family?" He smiled a bit. This was nice, he loved talking to her, but man it was tough. She was like an onion, you had to peel back one layer of her at a time. _

"_You've heard it all before. You know Mum and Da, Mike. The whole bit." She nodded and turned her attention back to the screen. _

"_Rachael, what would you think if we went up tomorrow to the 'Pool to see them." She cringed,_

"_You can take Lily if you want-"_

"_No, I want to take all of you." She eased out of his grip, shit he was losing her again,_

"_I really don't know." He held on with a firm grip,_

"_Come 'ead, they're nice enough, they won't bite." She sighed and took the baby from him._

"_Can we just get through the doctor's appointment tomorrow?" He felt a bit let down,_

"_Fine, one thing at a time I suppose." He went back to bed and fell asleep, with just a sliver of hope that maybe things would turn out alright._


	15. Chapter 15

**_A/N: Tell me whatcha think. :)_**

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_Rachael's P.O.V._

_I put Holly back in her crib and went back to my own bedroom, Paul was drifting off. I crawled in and tried to stay as close to the edge as I could. Throughout the night he kept trying to pull me over, or casually roll over to my side. I pushed him away and continued sleeping. It began to rain again outside, the weather wasn't great. I got up out of bed to get ready. _

_The kids were a different story; they were cranky from the moment they woke up. Lily and William were on a team, they each complained and griped at every possible thing. Each chance they got they nearly threw a fit,_

"_But mum I want to stay with you and daddy today." Lily stomped her foot and crossed her arms,_

"_Mommy's busy today. You're going to Nan's house, after that we can play all you want." She huffed and whispered something to William. He agreed and looked back down at his cereal bowl. Paul breezed in the kitchen and took one look at the situation,_

"_What's the matter?" Lily gave him a death glare,_

"_I guess you're going with her?"_

_Paul's P.O.V._

_He was actually surprised at the attitude the 5 year old was giving him. She usually glommed onto him, William looked equally as pissed. Rachael was trying to be completely loving and patient with them,_

"_Yes I am. But after that, we can have fun." She scrunched up her nose and whispered something else to her companion._

"_Lily, finish your breakfast." Rachael asked placidly. _

"'_M done. Will is too." Both pushed away their bowls and looked up at them in a complete snit._

"_That's good. Can you two please go get on your coats?" Lily huffed and both children crossed their arms,_

"_We don't need coats. It's not even cold outside." Rachael took a deep breath. Paul decided to step in,_

"_You have to listen to your mum. Everyone has to. That's kind of a rule." She looked unconvinced, "And it is cold outside." Lil rolled her eyes, William hopped down and being the little gentleman he was held out a hand for the girl to grab onto as she scooted down. The pair glared at Paul as they exited the room. Paul whistled,_

"_Quite the spitfire I see." Rachael didn't answer, she brushed past him with an outfit for Holly. He decided to let it go, he went out to the entranceway to check on the children's progress._

_Lillian's P.O.V. _

_She was mad, all she and William wanted to do was spend the day with Mum and Dad the way they had done in Greece. William held out her coat for her; the pair attempted to help each other button up._

"_Where are my favorite people?" She heard daddy call. William ignored him and fixed the collar of her coat, Lil glanced at him then turned back to the boy adjusting his buttons. Daddy came over and wordlessly buttoned up each of them then slid on his own coat then attemped to pick her up, Lil wasn't having it,_

"_I could walk myself." She hissed and grabbed onto William. Paul reached out for William, and he shook his head,_

"_Me too." Daddy let out a sigh,_

"_It's awful cold and rainy out there, I wouldn't want you two to get your shoes soaked." Lil rolled her eyes, that was a dumb excuse. _

"_Miss Lillian if you keep rolling your eye's at me, the good lord will freeze them that way." _

"_Maybe he will." She said under her breath. Willy heard her and stifled a laugh. He held out an arm for her and she entwined hers into his._

_Paul's P.O.V._

_To be completely honest, it was a bit amusing how cranky they were. The fact that Lillian had a quick wit and was able to shoot comeback's at him faster than the blink of an eye was incredible. _

"_That was mean Lil, you're making daddy sad, don't be a bully." He joked teasingly, she flicked a speck of lint off William's shoulder._

"_Takes one to know one." Paul pressed his fist into his lips and faked a cough to cover the laugh that had spilled out, how in the hell was she so quick?_

_Rachael walked in with her sunglasses on and Holly on her hip,_

"_Right then, let's get on with it." He said. The 5 of them made it down to the lobby, thankfully without a reporter in sight. As soon as they were about to walk out the door both Lily and Will looked apprehensive, they had both noticed how hard it was raining. They deliberately slowed down to a snail's pace,_

"_I told you." He said with a flit to his voice. The pair looked defeated and held up their arms to be carried. He obligingly complied and scooped them up. They buried their heads in each side of his neck in order to avoid the rain. They got to the car quickly and settled inside._

_Rachael's P.O.V._

_No one had said much of anything during the car ride; my heart was literally in my throat. I dropped the kid's off at the front step and gave a quick wave to Nan,_

"_I'll be back soon." She smiled and scooped the kids into hugs and pulled them into the house, I wished for a moment that I could switch places with one of them. I got back into the car._

"_They're okay?" I nodded. He pulled the car away from the curb and turned back into the city. About halfway through the ride I became aware of the radio- the entire time we had been in here it was on a fizzy signal, and neither one of us had noticed. I was nearly ready to jump out of the car. I was trembling fiercely and focusing as much as I could out the window. Paul glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and saw the state I was in. He pulled into the parking lot and took the key out of the ignition. He got out and before I could even turn, he had the door open and a hand held out. I ignored the hand and stood up myself. He put it on my lower back and took me in the direction of the office._

_I intentionally quickened my pace so that he couldn't touch me; the headstrong bastard sped up as well and kept his hand in the same place. When we got inside he pointed at a couch for me to sit on, I let out an irritated sigh while he signed us in under a pseudonym. Like it really mattered, obviously the doctor knew who he was dealing with, and fortunately there was a confidentiality code of conduct. Paul sat next down to me and put an arm around my shoulder. I immediately became stone and wanted nothing more than for him to leave me be. _

"_Mr. and Mrs. Manning?" He called from his door, Paul stood up pulling my along with him._

"_Right this way." We were led into the same room we had previously been in a few days ago. He sat me down on the examination chair and feverishly went through the normal checkup procedures,_

"_So we're going to have to do a blood test." I cringed, I absolutely hated needles. And I couldn't stand blood. He left the room briefly; Paul was still stationed next to me. The doctor returned with a nurse who held the utensils. He motioned for me to stick out my arm, I did so. Unenthusiastically. He got to work and I turned my head away, I couldn't bear to watch. The man got what he needed and packed up,_

"_It will be a few minutes." Then shut the door. I turned back to inspect the damage, a band-aid was left in its place. Paul took my arm gently and kissed where the bandage was. I looked away, he laced his fingers into mine giving my hand a light squeeze. The doctor finally came in with a happy but frustrated look on his face,_

"_Well, your hCG levels are unusually high." Paul raised an eyebrow,_

"_And that means-?" he inquired,_

"_It means you're expecting, congratulations." I stayed unmoved, "But since your levels are so far above the usual, this early- it could mean you're expecting more than one." My world instantaneously went black. _

_Paul's P.O.V._

_Rachael slumped down to her side,_

"_Rachael?." The doctor came over and put something under her nose she woke up, Paul quickly held her up and looked over at the doctor,_

"_I did say it was a possibility though, not exactly sure." He waited until the girl was steady then gave them a wave and he was off. Paul immediately scooped her up and brought her out to the car without so much as a nod to the secretary. He put her in the passenger seat, and got in himself locking the doors. The rain was coming down hard and fast, you could barely see an inch outside the windshield._

"_Hey lady, focus." Her head was still wobbling a bit as she was regaining consciousness. He pulled the lever back and made the seat in a half upright position, she tried sitting up but he gently pushed her down,_

"_Take it easy. Give yourself a tick." She stayed frozen, then pulled her hands to her face. His breath caught in his throat as he realized what they had just heard. He watched her start to silently cry, he himself broke down as well. He pulled her over and held her tightly. After about 1_5 minutes it was getting unbearable. He sat up and started the car. The entire time he tried comforting her through his own veil of tears. It was no use. He sped as fast as he could to the house and through the gates. He ran around to the other side of the car and pulled Rachael out gripping her tightly tremendously frightened to let go. He carried her into the house and into the bedroom. The pair fell into the bed weeping inconsolably. Paul composed himself and stroked her hair rocking smoothly,

"It's fine, I'm fine, you're fine." He whispered hoarsely. She nodded into his chest, and became quiet after a while. It finally hit him, he was going to be an actual dad, to not just Lillian or William or Holly. But to another person, maybe even more. He spent the next few hours rocking her until they both fell asleep utterly exhausted.

They awoke to a crash of lightening; Martha stood whimpering next to the bed with her tail between her legs. The dog knew better than to get on but Paul made an exception. He patted the spot and she instantly jumped up and cuddled herself into their pile. Martha immediately spotted Rachael and buried her nose into her neck. Rachael, who was still crying, lifted up her head and petted her. The dog let out a softer whimper and latched onto her. Rachael took it in stride and stroked her ears.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Martha was attached to me, I didn't mind it in the least. I leaned down and whispered into her ear,

"Storm's are scary, huh?" She looked up at me as if she understood and wiggled a little closer. I continued to hold onto her. Paul was glancing down his nose at me a few tears were in his eyes. We kept still until the worst of the storm had past, Martha had fallen asleep. Paul gently pushed her down a bit farther down the bed careful not to disturb her. He then turned towards me, nose to nose.

"So a baby?" I nodded. He smiled a bit,

"I'm happy" Then buried his face in my neck humming something incoherent.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Thoughts?**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't know how to feel. Obviously I was blessed with another child… or two. That didn't make the situation any easier though.

"Hey." Paul whispered, I squinted my eyes, I must've fallen asleep again.

"The kids are staying at Nan's." I was confused,

"How did you—"

"You had it written down on your fridge. I remembered."

"Oh." His stomach rumbled loudly,

"Wait just a second here." Paul hopped out of bed and sprinted down the stairs. Minutes later her returned with a carton of ice cream and a grin on his face. He parked it on the bed and flipped on the T.V. handing me a spoon. I settled in he dug right in, the T.V. was on the news-

**And coming up next is an interview with Beatle Paul McCartney, Former model Rachael Belter and the alleged secret family Paul has been keeping under wraps.-**

We both sat there in silence until it came on,

"Hey have a bite." He said putting a spoonful up to my mouth, I absentmindedly took it and waited for the dialogue to start. We watched quietly until Lillian started to speak-

"**And is Paul your daddy?"** The man asked

"**Yep, what of it, sonny?"** Lil replied with a smirk on her face.-

We watched ourselves on the screen, my eyebrows shot up and Paul started laughing. Paul shifted in the bed and looked straight at me, he couldn't hold it in any longer, he started chuckling which quickly escalated into a hysterical laugh. I wasn't much better, I was deliriously tired, and worn out. I couldn't stop until I had tears running down my face.

"My god, she's such a smart arse." I nodded and tried to calm myself down, it was no use. As soon as one of us had stopped we would look at each other and would start all over again. After a few minutes my stomach ached and my head hurt. We finally quieted down until it was the occasional giggle or snort at something the kids had said.-

"**How do you feel about the press?"** On screen me gave him a smile,

"**How do you feel about it?"** In the background you could hear Neil howling with laughter,

"**Are there wedding bells in the future?"** On screen Paul quickly stepped in and ended the interview by ushering us off the stage.

"**There you have it folks, Paul McCartney and Rachael Belter-"** Paul flipped the channel and looked over at me. I kept my eyes glued to the screen.

Paul's P.O.V.

He had definitely forgotten that the interview had ended like that, He held in a breath and looked over at Rachael, she was still staring at the screen,

"So would you?" She looked over at him,

"Would I, what?"

"Would you marry me?" She rolled her eyes,

"That's a dumb question." He wasn't surprised,

"No it's really not." He gulped,

"Paul, it really is. Just because we had a kid together and we're having another one, it's no reason to get married." He nodded his head,

"Actually, it's the perfect reason." She huffed and rolled over, turning away from him.

"No. I'm not going to marry you. And don't ask again." He reached out to touch her back, she basically jumped like she had been touched with an electric cattle prod. That deeply hurt him inside, he sighed and put the ice cream carton on the bedside table.

"So this how it's going to be?" He questioned. She shrugged her shoulders,

"At least know that I love you completely, and I'm sorry for upsetting you again." She didn't even look up at him, he took her into his arms and jostled her a bit,

"Well, if you're not going to speak to me… or marry me, can you at least come to Liverpool tomorrow with me?" She huffed,

"I'm going to take that as a Yes." She looked back at him shooting a death glare, he put on a cheeky smile and scooted closer planting a kiss on her cheek.

"You're just lovely, you know that?" He murmured inhaling her scent; it was intoxicating.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I was annoyed with him again, he was acting like nothing had ever happened and that everything was going perfectly- it wasn't. I definitely was not going to marry him, and I sure as hell was not looking forward to going to Liverpool with him. Paul slid his hand up under my dress and felt my stomach, I tightened my abdomen muscles. Paul pinched my bottom,

"Knock it off, I'm allowed to touch you." I didn't relax,

"You're difficult, you know that?" He mumbled.

"Yeah, and you're obnoxious." I muttered. He started to chuckle and fell asleep.

Paul's P.O.V.

He woke up in the early morning, Rachael was still firmly held in his arms, he reached over and picked up the phone dialing quickly,

"Hello?" This time it was his brother,

"Hey Mike, we're coming down to see you today."

"Well good timing lad, family is coming over later."

"Alright, we'll be there around noon."

"Who are you bringing?"

"All of them." His brother snickered into the phone,

"We saw Rachael with you on the telly last night, quite the looker she is." Paul chuckled,

"Back off, you've got Angela."

"I know, but we're an open couple." Paul stifled a laugh,

"Play nice son. See you soon." He hung up the phone and looked down at Rachael. She was sleeping with a mask of complete relaxation. He tucked her hair behind her ear, and leaned down,

"Wake up." She muttered something and wrinkled her nose. Paul snickered,

"What's that? Said you'll marry me?" Her eyes shot open and she crawled out of bed,

"Not on your life, McCartney." He laughed, she flicked him off and went to the bathroom. When she returned she was holding her purse,

"Well, let's get on with it then. I'm wearing the same clothes as last night. I don't want the reporters to see me." Paul wiggled his eyebrows,

"Maybe you don't have to wear anything then." Her face turned to stone,

"I'm honestly not in the mood." He brushed the smile off of his face and got out of bed,

"Sorry." Rachael waited for him to get changed and they set off towards Nan's house. Once the kids were back with them they sported a remarkably better mood than yesterday,

"Daddy, we colored you a picture." Lily said, William handed him the drawing. It was a shakily colored picture of 5 people. Two of which were taller than the rest and were holding hands,

"See that's you and mummy. And that's me, Willy and Holly." She explained. Paul was touched by the picture,

"Thanks guys." Rachael got in the car with Holly and he handed her the picture before pulling away from the curb.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I looked down at the drawing, while Lily explained it. I put on a fake smile,

"Great job." I told them, they settled into the back seat and began chattering away to one and other. Paul pulled the car up to the building and we exited. I went up to the flat with Holly and Paul took the two others.

"Mum what are we doing today?" I looked over at Paul. He answered for me,

"We're going to visit daddy's family." She and William nodded. When we got upstairs I took a shower and stepping out into my room with a towel wrapped around me. I picked out a dress and began in on my hair, Paul walked in. I was immediately ticked off,

"Excuse me, but this is my bathroom." He shrugged and adjusted himself in front of the toilet taking a long, unselfconscious leak. I rolled my eyes and got ready. The kids were waiting on the couch for us as we walked out. They had their coats on and waited for Paul to pick them up, I got Holly and we set off.

I kept quiet on the car ride up. Paul had mentioned somewhere along the line that his dad was retired, but he had also said he had arthritis pretty bad and that he had remarried a woman with a six year old daughter. I wasn't worried about meeting any of them; they seemed like normal enough people.

When we pulled up to the house, Lil, Will and Holly were sleeping. Paul parked in the driveway and took a minute,

"You okay?" I looked over at him,

"I'm fine."

Paul's P.O.V.

Rachael put on a fake smile, it irritated him a bit. He just wanted her back to normal, and happy. He knew she was scared, but he was too that was no excuse to give him the cold shoulder. Paul woke up the two older kids, giving them a minute to regain consciousness before he opened the back seat door and pulled them out. He held Lily and gave William his other hand to latch onto. The 5 of them made it to the front door, it instantaneously swung open and his brother flew out,

"There's my boy!" He looked down and saw the kids, "More the merrier, come 'ead." He let them inside and Paul's father and step mother greeted him and Rachael,

"This is Lillian" He introduced bouncing her against his hip, "And this is William." He said holding up the boy's hand. He put Lily down to say hi, Mike got down to his knees to take a look,

"Lord almighty, son." He said winking at Lillian, "She's the spitting image of you." Rachael walked in and smiled at everyone,

"Hello" She said cheerfully, Mike set in on her,

"My, aren't you a pretty thing?" He said taking her hand and giving it a kiss with a wink, Jim swatted at his youngest son,

"Behave." Paul's family began introducing themselves. They seemed to really like Rachael.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I took an immediate liking to Paul's family, especially Mike. I guess I had expected a lesser edition of Paul, a shadow of his big brother. He didn't appear much like Paul and was nothing like him in behavior either. His sense of humor was more like John's than Paul's. The pair of us chatted and he stuck to my side while I talked to met everyone else. Lily and William set off in pursuit of Paul's young step-sister Ruth who was out in the back garden. Paul took Holly and put her up in his old bedroom to sleep while I got to know Mike's wife, Angela. Then Aunt Gin arrived. She breezed into the house, with hugs for Mike and Angela and then arrived to Paul with an enormous tightly wound hug which he returned willingly.

She wasn't even through hugging him when she demanded, "All right, Paulie my boy. Where is she?"

"Right here," he said and pulled me over to stand in front of him, on display. Introductions were made. Aunty Gin hugged me and managed to give me head to toe inspection at the same time.

"Just lovely, but skinny, Paul. Do you feed her?" Then Gin turned to him again, "And the children?" Paul turned around,

"Lillian, William, get over here!" He called. Lily and Will came scurrying in, they jumped on Paul, he caught them and held them up for Gin to examine.

"My goodness, hello." Gin reached out for Lil who had a goofy grin splashed across her face, "Paul, she's the spitting image of you!" Mike stood up,

"That's what I said!" She then looked over William who was shyly peeking out from Paul's neck, "And are you William?" He nodded, "He's certainly charming, Paul." He grinned proudly and put them down. They ran back outside to play in the garden.

"Gin, go help Angie in the kitchen if you would. She needs help making supper." Paul's Father asked.

"Certainly, and I'll just take Rachael with me to help. No better place to get to know a gal than over a cup of tea."

"I beg to differ," Mike murmured nudging Paul. The boys were snickering like schoolboys and Jim was lecturing them as Gin took my hand and led me away.

"So Paul told me that you're taking care of your niece?" I nodded,

"Holly, she's napping in Paul's room."

"My, my, you have you hands full. That's fine though, come on pet, let's go help Angie."

Paul's stepmother, Angie, seemed nice but anxious. I recognized that she was still adjusting to this multitude of relatively new family herself. The three of us were giggling at stories Gin was telling us about Paul and Mike when they were children when Mike came after me.

"Rach, Paul sent me to rescue you from the clutches of Angie and Aunty Gin. The rest of the family wants to meet you."

I expected a few people to stop in but there must have been seventy people in the house and an army of children! Paul was visibly cheerful to see the turnout, even touched by it. Over the next couple of hours, people continued to drop in adding old friends to the mob of relatives. I had nearly met them all, Paul was tugging me about, I finally took a moment to myself and met Angela in the kitchen,

"How many McCartney's are there?" She busted out laughing,

"I have no idea; I can't half of their names straight!" She gave me a hug and I returned to the front room,

"Rach! Over here!" Paul called for me holding out a hand. I reluctantly stood next to him. We were standing in a group of family who were discussing something about what seemed like their hairdressers, neighbors, second-cousins, mailman's wedding. Paul leaned over and whispered,

"Where are the kids?" I searched around for a moment and spotted them. Lillian had taken up residence in Aunty Gins lap and William was playing with Paul's brother Mike.

"They've seemed to blend in well enough." He chuckled, "Where's Holly?"

"She's still in your room." He smiled, "That's good." He pulled me closer to his side and rejoined the conversation every so often rubbing my back and making sure I was alright. Mike came over and began telling me about his photography, he finally got me laughing so hard I thought I was going to be sick. He gave me a hug and glanced up at Paul,

"Keep an eye on 'er, mate. Someone might just steal her away." Mike said teasingly. Paul gave him a smirk, "Not bloody likely, son."

"Bugger that, she's still not your gal. How much time 'ave we got, love?" He whispered out loud for the room to hear. I couldn't catch my breath from laughing so much,

Paul stuck his hands between our midsections and parted us, "Leave room for the Holy Ghost or I'll bloody yah!"

Paul gave Mike a brotherly hug around the neck, cutting off his oxygen.

"Behave or I'll send Gin in on you." Mike patted his cheek with a chuckle and mingled his way across the room. Lily pulled the bottom of my dress, I squatted down,

"Mum, Holly's crying." I got up and climbed the stairs to Paul's bedroom; sure enough the baby was fussing. I got her up and bounced her around. She had finally quieted down and had her little arms wrapped around my neck. I continued pacing and rocking her while taking a look around Paul's room. A few posters on the wall, and records stacked in one corner. He had been here some since he moved his dad.

Paul's P.O.V.

He watched Rachael walk upstairs to go check on Holly, Lily had scurried off to rejoin the army of children. A group surrounded him once again sucking him into the discussion.

A while later he spotted Rachael coming back downstairs with the baby, immediately a group of females descended upon her swallowing her up and cooing to the infant. Mike came around and led his brother over to the wall for a small chat,

"Everyone seems to love her, she's a riot." Paul grinned proudly,

"She's amazing, isn't she?" Mike nodded and looked over at her,

"But there's definitely something odd going on." Paul grimaced, Mike must've noticed Rachael giving him the cold shoulder.

"What?" Mike thought about it for a moment.

"She's pregnant, isn't she?" Paul was completely bewildered, "So it's true?"

"How did you know?" He choked out. His brother shrugged,

"Wild guess." Mike patted his cheek, "Congrats, son. I won't tell anyone."

Paul nodded in thanks, his brother walked away. He took a deep breath, he had definitely dodged a bullet.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Around ten the rest of the family had left and we were sitting around the living room chatting. Eventually Angela and I got tired and bid good night. I was to be staying in Paul's room and he was getting the couch. I went upstairs to check on the kids. William and Lily had fallen asleep in Ruth's room, and Holly was in the guestroom snoozing. I was nearly sound asleep when I felt Paul kneel next to the bed.

"The couch was killing my back, what did you think of the family?" he asked.

"They were great."

He just laughed. "So was it awful for you?"

"It wasn't horrific."

"You charmed the knickers off of Gin. They all liked you."

"Mike was my favorite."

"You just leave his knickers alone!" He snorted. The door creaked open and Mike stuck his head in with a wild grin on his face,

"Oops, Love. You didn't tell me he'd be in here tonight." Mike teased with a wink.

Paul took off his shoe and whipped it at the door, his younger brother expertly dodged it and I busted up laughing,

"Oh," he said pleasantly, "Uncontrollable laughter, Rachael? Has our young man just now gotten round to letting you see his Beatle deedle?" I buried my face into the pillow and howled.

"Go to bed Mike." Paul snorted, Mike gave a final cocky smirk and saluted,

"You know where my room is lovely" And left.

"You two seem to be getting along smashingly." I nodded,

"He's great." Paul tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, and leaned closer,

"Better than me?" I thought about it for a moment,

"You're impossible." Mike opened the door again,

"Hope I'm not interrupting anything, but Angela and I were wondering if we could steal the kids from you tomorrow, we need practice." Paul chortled,

"Be careful with them." He winked, and Mike chuckled.

"Feel free to be as loud as you want tonight, the old man sleeps like a log and 's deaf in one ear to boot." I gave Mike the finger and Paul winged his other shoe at the door.

"Ta then now!" He triumphantly beamed and left us alone at last. I was still laughing.

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul looked down at her with a look on his face that spelled nothing short of adoration.

"There's my girl. I missed that smile." She looked up at him. He got lost in her eyes, he scampered into bed pulling her close and wiggled his eyebrows, "I have a surprise for you tomorrow." She raised an eyebrow,

"What?" He put on his most cheeky grin and widened his eyes,

"You get to go on a date with the one and only Paul McCartney. What a lucky girl you are!" She smacked him on the chest and shook her head laughing,

"What? Come on I haven't taken you out anywhere since Hamburg." She was still shaking her head and laughing,

"You're quite hard to please you know that?" He tickled her and she squirmed,

"Knock it off, go sleep on the couch." She said breathlessly,

"I cannot!" He moaned tightening his grip, "Me back 'urts like a bitch."

"There's not enough room for you on here!" She giggled,

"Oh sure there is!" he rolled on top of her, "Right here."

"Ooof. Your crushing me." She said quietly,

He leaned back a little bit but held on firmly, "Don't be dramatic, I have to stay here tonight."

"And why is that?" She asked,

"Because I swear to god there's a monster in that closet, and if he gets you I just couldn't forgive myself." She rolled her eyes and he pecked her cheek. She looked surprised for a moment. Then closed her eyes,

"I'm going to sleep."

He shook her a bit, and she opened one eye, "You wake me up if you hear the monster, okay?" She closed her eyes,

"No chance in hell, I'm going to let him eat you." Paul chuckled,

"Goodnight Rachael. I love you." He said She didn't move, he jostled her a bit and pinched her bum,

"Goodnight Paul. Quit waking me up." He let her drift off, she drovehim insane.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Reviews?**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

I drifted off into sleep, Paul managed to stay in the bed even through my protests. The dream I had was pretty bizarre.

I was in a darkened house, the only light there was, was through a sliver of a window. I heard a baby crying. I instantly tried to find it; I didn't recognize this child though. It reached up for me and when I tried to cradle it, it vanished. That was until I tried to wake up, I couldn't. It was one of those dreams you had to struggle to rouse up from. It was if I was paralyzed I tried to open my eyes and say something but I was frozen still. An unfamiliar figure walked into the room, its face was covered by a high collar and a low hat. When it arrived it stood right in front of me, it slowly took off the hat and folded down the neckline. Nothingness stared straight at me. The figures' face was completely flat and white, I tried to move away but my legs weren't working,

"Don't be afraid." A voice boomed in a soothing voice, it kept repeating itself, almost like a chant. The voice quickly got angry. Each time it repeated itself it got harsher and harsher until it almost sounded like a snarl. I was terrified to say the absolute least.

I felt shaking; it took a few moments for me to come around,

"Hey, sweetheart, wakeup." Paul sounded worried.

Paul's P.O.V

Rachael's face was scrunched up and she was trembling something fierce. He gently touched her face, she didn't react she stayed frozen still. His anxiety got the best of him,

"Hey, sweetheart, wakeup." He pleaded while shaking her arm a tad.

"Mm?" It took her a moment to regain awareness and flicker her eyes open,

"Are you okay?" He asked. She looked at him and touched his face. She was completely confused, "Bad dream?" He guessed, she nodded.

"It's alright, I'm here." He crooned. She kept her eyes locked on his, her nose was scrunched and her lips were tightly pursed.

"Tell me about it." He asked quietly. She shrugged not really finding her voice, and untangled herself from his grip, He heard the bathroom door close.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I made my way to the bathroom and splashed some cold water on my face, and found a towel. I was patting dry when I felt a pair of hands on my hips. I practically jumped a mile,

"Easy there." Paul whispered, my heart was nearly pounding through my chest. He pulled me close up, "It was that bad, huh?" I coughed and tried to twist away, he held on tight and nestled into my neck,

"Don't be afraid." He mumbled. I was completely petrified. I pried his fingers off one by one and left. I needed a breath of air, I felt like I was drowning.

Paul's P.O.V.

She scurried out of the room faster than he could blink. He shot out directly behind her, and down the stairs. She had her coat already on and was silently opening the door.

"Wait." He hissed, "Where are you going?" She shot out the door barefoot. Paul slid on his shoes and ran straight after her, The rain was blinding he nearly got close but man she was fast. He followed her nearly 8 blocks until he lunged forward and grabbed her,

"Where the hell are you going?" He shouted she sobbed, and twisted away. It took all of his strength but he wouldn't let her free,

"Answer me!" The thundering clouds seemed to get louder.

"Let me go!" Paul was infuriated,

"Tell me where the fuck you're going this instant!" She pounded on his chest,

"Let me go!" He pulled her into hard into him she could scarcely inhale and broke down himself,

"Where are you going?" He roared. She was silent. He looked at her face, she looked like death. He eyes wandered down to her feet, they were bare and completely cut up,

"Jesus Christ, you're bleeding." She made a move to get away but he held on for dear life, he swooped under and picked her up, and turned back towards the direction of his house, "Rach! You're so stupid. Why did you do that, huh? You're so stupid. Why did you run away?" He asked through his tears while feverishly kissing her cheeks. He noticed a payphone on the side of the road, he rushed over and dialed quickly before slumping on the curb with Rachael,

"Mm?" A groggy Mike answered,

"Mike, come pick us up." Paul said in between sobs,

"Where are you, son?" Mike exclaimed in a loud whisper now fully awake, Paul gave him the street name and let the phone drop. He rocked Rachael and slid off his coat putting it over her,

"Don't worry Darling, Mike's coming." She looked nearly gone. Her eyes were black and her skin was pasty white. She just stayed there emotionless. A car sped around the corner and nearly clipped them. It came to an abrupt stop and Mike flew out,

"What the fuck is going on?" He shouted through the rain. Paul got up and flung the car door open carrying Rachael in and held her as close as humanly possible. Mike got in the car wordlessly and noticed Rachael's bloody feet. He cringed and decided not to press the subject, he sped back to the house,

"Wait here." He said before running into the house. He came back a moment later with a blanket and a pair of tweezers,

"No one's up, let me see 'er foot." He tossed Paul the blanket and came around to Paul's side of the car, and lobbed the door open and took her foot instantly burying the metal tweezers

"Where's all of this from?" he asked Paul as he pulled out a large sliver.

"I think she stepped on a bottle."

"Shit." He muttered, and pulled out the last few pieces, "That's all I can do. It looks worse than it actually is." He looked up at his older brother,

"Take good care of her, lad." He calmly closed the car door and ran back inside to dodge the storm. Paul still was on the verge of a mental breakdown,

"Why?" He whispered, but she was already asleep. He sighed and with a heavy heart took her back into the house without making a peep. He was in deep shit.

When he put her back into bed he looked down at her for a moment, how could a dream have ever been that bad? She lost it and ran off. He looked down at her feet, they weren't bleeding as bad as they were before. Her clothes were soaking wet though, he gently stripped them off and grabbed an old button down shirt from his closet and pulled it over her head. Then took a towel that was lying on the floor and wiped off her feet. She was still sleeping soundly, in an almost angelic manner. He knelt next to the bed and stayed up throughout the night watching her, and letting his mind wander. At around six o'clock Mike peeked his head in the door.

Mike's P.O.V.

He peered into his older brother's room. Paul was kneeling next to the bed staring at Rachael. Rachael was a near translucent white, the episode last night had him completely taken aback. Paul hadn't explained why they were out in the storm or more importantly how they had gotten so far away from the house. He suspected something was terribly wrong between them but decided not to ask any questions, Paul looked wrecked enough himself.

"Hey, lad." He whispered. Paul turned around, Mike was a bit staggered- his brother's eyes were crimson rimmed, his usually light skin was ashen, and his eyes were sunken and bags were present underneath. "We're heading out, we've got the kids. Da and Angie took Ruth somewhere, they won't be back until late." Paul just stared past him to a place only he knew.

"Thanks." Paul croaked.

Paul's P.O.V.

He turned back to Rachael. She looked serene. When Mike shut the door Rachael's eyes fluttered open, she took a moment then looked towards him. He took her hand and kissed it holding it close,

"Hi there." He said warmly. Paul closed his eyes while she took her delicate fingers and slowly traced the outline of his face, and each of his features, like she was trying to memorize them or trying to decide if he was actually real. When her fingers touched his lips he kissed them lightly. He finally opened his eyes. Rachael was staring back at him in an innocent but troubled manner, through it all she looked like an angel; his angel.

"What happened last night?" He questioned calmly. She looked frightened but spoke gently.

"I was upset."

"About what?" She looked conflicted,

"I don't know."

He raised an eyebrow, "It had to be about something." She looked down at her hands and started picking at her nails. Paul took them up and held onto them,

"It was a nightmare." She said quietly. His looked instantly softened.

Rachael's P.O.V.

"It was that bad, huh?" I nodded, it was awful.

"Rach, can you do me a favor?" I looked up at him, "Please don't ever run away from me again."

I couldn't breathe. I was conflicted, I had run away more than once, but it was for good reasons. The first time was because of Lillian. The other times we had been in arguments, and now I had run away because of a dream. I guess running away was my way of coping with tough situations. I figured if I went, then there wouldn't be a problem anymore, obviously Paul felt otherwise.

"Be here with me, I'll stay with you; just stay with me." He countered. I frowned sincerely, feeling overwhelmingly guilty. I'd never felt like such an awful person until that moment. I just let out a sigh. I wasn't going to sit here and lie to him. I didn't know if I was going to 'go away' again. Hell, I didn't even know what I was going to do tomorrow. I didn't answer him.

"You're a tough one to break, you know that?" He groaned with a slight amusement tugging at the corners of his lips, "Usually by now a bird would be head over heels in love with me and begging to have my babies." I busted out laughing, and swatted at him thankful that he broke the awkward tension.

"You're swine McCartney." I snorted, he put on a mock face like he was actually hurt, he grabbed his chest right over his heart,

"Rach, you're breaking my heart!"

"Good." I said with a smirk.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was glad she was smiling again even if they were both off the deep end. He decided to follow up on his antics,

"You know what cures a broken heart?" She tilted her head to the side with a devilish grin,

"A drinking binge and an awful hangover?" She guessed. He shook his head,

"No, a cold shower." He scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder,

"No, please!" She squirmed uncontrollably giggling, he gave her a tap on the bottom and let out a manic laugh,

"Quiet down, I don't want to wake the neighbors. They'll think we're being naughty." She tried kneeing him in the chest, but he held her legs down, "I love the feisty ones, you know that?" They had reached the bathroom, he put her down on the counter and turned towards the shower and flipped it on full blast.

"In you go." He said looking at her. She shook her head,

"No way." Paul thought about it for a moment,

"Right then, I'll give you an option." She looked up at him and folded her arms, "You can either take a freezing cold shower with me, OR you can spend the day with me."

"Hmm." She said tapping her chin. He tapped his foot mocking being impatient, "Neither!"

"It doesn't work like that, lass! I gave you two choices." She finally let out an exaggerated sigh, or what he hoped was exaggerated.

"Fine. I'll spend the day with you." Joy shot through him,

"Fantastic. Now get your bottom into the shower. Be quick about it." He left the room and headed downstairs.

.Rachael's P.O.V.

I put my arm in the shower, it was incredibly freezing. I tried turning on the hot water but the temperature didn't change. I stuck my head out the door,

"Paul!" I hollered,

"What?" Came a shouted response from downstairs.

"Why is the water so damn cold?"

"Oh.. I forgot to mention. Water heater 's out." I could hear him laughing from downstairs. What an intolerable bastard he was.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: This one has a bit of fluff. There's going to be a twist in the story soon, so be prepared!**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

I finished the shower, it was extremely icy. I was shivering as I stepped out. My feet didn't hurt as bad as they had before though. I quickly wrapped a towel around myself and went back to the bedroom. I searched through my suitcase desperately for something warm. My hunt came up with little result though, I turned to Paul's closet and fumbled through his old clothes. I finally came up with an worn button down shirt. I quickly threw them on it was certainly long enough to where I didn't need a pair of pants. I ventured downstairs, Paul was waiting in the kitchen pouring out tea, he looked up and chuckled,

"Cold?" I nodded, he came over and gave me a kiss on the cheek and pulled back a bit,

"You're bloody freezing," he said, pulling me to him and wrapping his arms around me in an effort to warm me up. Then he chuckled, "You look good in my clothes." I swatted him on the chest, He let go and got the tea motioning for me to follow him into the sitting room. He put them down on the coffee table and ran back into the kitchen. I took a seat on the couch and flipped on the T.V. Paul came back in with a plate full of cookies,

"I pinched some biscuits from last night." He put them next to the tea and plopped down on the couch. I reached over to my side and grabbed the telephone,

"Who're you callin'? He asked,

"I have to check on things back home." I dialed the front desk at the apartment complex, they were supposed to screen call's for my while I was away. Paul scooted closer and wrapped an arm around my shoulder placing his head next to the receiver,

"Quit being nosy." I hissed. He chuckled,

"I just like to know what's goin' on." The phone instantly came to life,

"Hi this is Rachael Belter, I was wondering if I had any messages?" A woman from the other end sounded off,

"Hi Ms. Belter" She named quite a few people and places that had called, none of them seemed worth calling back, "Oh. And your lawyers called, they said it's imperative you get back to them."

"Okay thank-you." I hung up and picked back up dialing again,

"Hello?" It was my attorney Maxwell,

"Hi Max, it's Rachael."

"Hello Rachael, I've got some exciting news for you." I already knew what he was going to say, "You've been granted full custody of William." I beamed,

"That's fantastic!"

"I knew you'd be pleased. Now there's just one more thing that I would like to chat about with you."  
"And what would that be?"

"It's about your niece Holly Belter-Frank." I had completely forgotten that I had told him about the situation.

"Oh?" I pulled away from Paul a little bit, He kept close though with furrowed brows,

"Yes, I think it would be in your best interest to file for temporary guardianship of the child." My breath caught in my throat. I didn't know what to think, Holly was my niece. Not my daughter. She was Kelley's child but, hell… I don't know,

"Why?" I managed to choke out through my regular voice.

"Well I was discussing your 'situation' with some of the other attorney's and we feel it is quite strange that you do not know the current whereabouts of your sister. It would also be a matter of convenience. If the child was to get sick, or if the chance came that you needed to leave the country, it would be easier for you to do so." I thought about it for a moment,

"How long would it take?"

"Not long at all actually. With your consent I can have this matter taken care of by tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" How could you just give a someone's care and well being, a life, up to someone in a matter of a day?

"Yes, but you would have to appear in court." I felt a bit apprehensive,

"I don't know…" My voice trailed off,

"It really isn't as bad as it sounds. Just a quick hearing." I relented.

"Fine. Call me back when you know the details."

"Of course, stay near to the phone.

"I will, thank-you." I clicked off. I put back down the phone and stared at the T.V.

"You're doing the right thing, love." I looked over at him, I had totally forgotten that he had just heard that entire conversation.

"Do you really think so?" I asked hoping for some sort of reassurance.

"Yeah. I know so."

Paul's P.O.V.

He looked Rachael over and couldn't help but feel complete adoration. She cared so much for everyone around her, and most importantly those kids. He fought the overwhelming urge to attack her and ravish her in love. He gulped, she looked stunning, her dark eyes, faultless skin, hell even through his baggy old clothes he could see the outline of her figure, and not to mention what that did to him. She wasn't wearing anything under the shirt except maybe knickers. He squinted his eyes. Yes, without doubt knickers. She looked sexier in his old worn out shirt than any of the girls he'd ever seen naked, and he wanted her so bad he could taste it. It was almost obsessive to a point. But he restrained himself. She turned her attention back to the T.V. and he continued to look at her, after a moment or so she glanced back at him with a small smile,

"Take a picture it'll last longer." Not to mention that sense of humor, she was like a bad habit- hard to get a hold of, and something you'd never want to stop.

"You're cute." She gave him a nod.

"I know." He chuckled, she was so… frustrating,

"You're also a brat." She rolled her eyes and looked back to the show that was on, he looked back at it. Nothing terribly interesting, he snuggled closer to Rachael.

"So, what do you want to do today?" She asked, he thought about it some. There were a few things, nothing that she would agree to though,

"I don't know." He reached up and pulled a strand of her still-damp hair and twirled it around his finger. She glanced back over at him, he winked at her. She let out an exasperated sigh,

"I did promise you that I'd go on and take you on a proper date." She shook her head,

"Can't. I have to stay by the phone." He thought about it for a moment,

"We could, hmm…." He thought about it for a moment and tapped his chin she gave him a fleeting look of amusement,

"We could have a party."

"Nope."

He continued his mock pondering, "We could start a riot."

"Nope. I think we've had enough media attention for a bit."

"We could buy the circus and have them come perform right here in the sitting room."

"Nope. Clowns scare me." They continued their guessing game for a while, until he finally blurted it out.

He sighed, "We could get married?" She shot him a look, he put up his hands in surrender,

"Just a suggestion." She rolled her eyes,

"And a stupid one at that. Quit asking." He gave her a cheeky smile and a kiss on the cheek.

"Can't. I like you too much." She poked him in the chest,

"That makes one of us." He wiped away a fake tear,

"Quit breaking me heart, Rach." She laughed, he was glad he hadn't upset her.

"What about if we just spent the day together?" She shrugged.

"I have a date." His eyebrows shot up,

"What..?" He managed to croak out. She busted out laughing.

"I'm just kidding, calm yourself." He let out a sigh of relief, for a split second there he thought she was dead serious.

"I swear 't god. You're going 't give me a heart attack one of these days." She giggled, he snuggled closer and tentatively placed his hand on her stomach. They hadn't really talked about 'it' all that much. She glanced down at him.

"Rach, I've been thinking some."

Rachael's P.O.V.

I honestly didn't want to get into this right now. Knowing the two of us and our history, this was bound to end up in an all out 'Who can shout louder' match.

"About what?" I cringed a bit. His hand rubbed over my still-flat stomach a touch,

"If it's a girl, I want to name it Hortense." He blurted out. My heart stopped and I busted out laughing, immediately knowing he was teasing me,

"You're such - ," I was laughing so hard my ribs ached I swatted at him, he grabbed my wrist and busted out laughing as well. "You're such a bastard."

"What? It's a beautiful name." He said through laughter.

"Oh my god, Paul. It's horrible. That's a name for a ninety year old woman." After a minute we had finally calmed down.

"I suppose." He said with fake disappointment.

Paul's P.O.V.

He loved making her laugh, he lived for it. If cracking jokes was the only way they could get by right now, so be it. He settled back into the couch and left his hand on her stomach, the phone rang again and she reached over to pick it up, he scooted up until his head was on the receiver as well, he could hear their conversation perfectly,

"Ms. Belter?" The attorney asked,

"Yes?"

"We have a court date set up for you tomorrow at 8:30. You're going to have to bring the child with you." He felt her tense just a bit,

"Why?"

"The judge will probably want to know if she's well and accounted for."

"We'll be there. Thanks. Take care." She said before putting down the phone. He looked back over at her, he couldn't really read her expression. She didn't seem to be upset, just calm.

"So tomorrow?" She nodded. "I'd like to go with you if that'd be alright?" She glanced over at him.

"Do what you want. I'm not in charge of you." He knew she didn't actually mean to be so uncaring- or at least he hoped she didn't. He saw her eyes flicker a few times, he felt sleepy too.

"Take a kip with me?" He asked. She nodded and leaned into his side. He pulled her onto of himself and ran his hands up and down her back. His heart almost burst from his contentment at this moment, she was actually letting him touch her. He watched as she laid her head on his chest and let out a breath. He could practically feel her heart beating, this was perfect.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Here's the startup for the twist.**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

I woke up feeling nauseous and just in one word, disgusting. I crawled away from Paul and staggered up to the stairs to the bathroom. I fumbled with the light switch some before making my way to the toilet. I knew what was going to happen next and thoroughly tried to avoid it but, it was no use. I got horridly sick for a few minutes then I was fine. After finishing that little episode I went back into the bedroom and managed to pull on some of my own clothes and partially fix my hair, until a second bout of sickness overtook me. I scurried back into the bathroom and locked the door before kneeling down. I grabbed my stomach as the contents made their way out. I coughed a few times and sat back on my heels a loud rap came from the door,

_"Rach, are you alright?"_ I conjured up my most normal sounding voice,

"_I'm fine, just swallowed some water funny_." I didn't want to tell Paul the truth, he would get worried and blow it out of proportion.

"_Oh. Okay, I'll be downstairs_." My stomach decided to make a upheaval again, I went down for the third time nearly sure my lungs would come up. Paul's persevering knocking came again,

"_Rach. Open up_." I couldn't answer him, I was down for the count a fourth time. The back of my throat burned like I had swallowed an entire bottle of whiskey. He unlocked the door somehow and knelt down next to me until I was finished.

"_Christ, are you okay_?" I nodded my head, I actually felt completely better than I had before. He pulled me close and rocked a bit, "_Why didn't you wake me up?"_ He asked.

"_I'm fine_." He sighed,

_"Do you want to go lay down?"_ I shook my head,

_"No, the kids will be home soon, I'm fine_." He looked me over a bit apprehensively,

_"Alright, but don't push it. Tell me if you're feeling ill."_ I rolled my eyes, he acted like I was deathly sick. I was just a bit nauseous, it was nothing serious. He walked back into the bedroom and I freshened up, A few minutes later we heard the door open and the noisy group came back in,

_"Mum!"_ Will and Lily shrieked at the same time, I went down the stairs and met them at the bottom giving hugs and Kisses. Mike was smiling like a madman,

"_Good day?"_ I asked he nodded,

_"You've got some great kids 'ere. Sucks for me though."_ I raised an eyebrow,

_"Why?"_ He chuckled,

_"Now Angela wants and entire brood of 'em."_ A few moments later Angela came through the door with Holly. The baby was smiling and laughing as she talked to her animatedly, I went over to greet them,

_"She's just so precious!"_ Angela said happily, I nodded,

_"Did they all behave?"_

_"Oh yes! Like little angels, Lily over there even took care of a pesky reporter."_

_"A reporter?"_ I questioned weakly, my mood dropped just a bit. I hated when the kids had to deal with the new media attention.

_"Nothing to worry about!"_ She exclaimed noticing my falling appearance,

_"Some photographer came up and started on with the questions, she just stood there and gave him a confused look until he backed away."_ I busted out laughing.

_"Seriously?"_ She nodded,

_"It was probably the funniest thing I've seen in a while."_ My mood instantly lightened, at least the kids were dealing with it okay.

We were quickly taken into the kitchen, Angela started dinner for the kids, and Mike and Paul were joking about with them in the sitting room.

_"Rach, are you feeling okay?"_ Angela asked quietly, while stirring something in a pot,

_"Yeah, why?"_ She looked me over and tilted her head to the side,

_"You seem a bit pale."_ I shrugged it off,

_"Long day 's all."_ I put Holly on the floor she wobbly sat up and played with some pots and a spoon. I helped Ang as best as I could considering I'm probably the worst cook that had ever lived. Sandwiches were just about as fancy as it got around my house; Paul walked in and wrapped his arms around me,

_"Feelin' alright?"_ He whispered, I nodded. He looked down at Holly and she eagerly reached up for him. Paul was beginning to become one of her favorite people,

_"Hello Miss Holly."_ He cooed, _"Let's go play with the others."_ She smiled as Paul took her away to the front room,

_"It's amazing actually."_ Angela commented, _"This is the most calm I've ever seen Paul. He's different around you and the kids."_ I absorbed this information quietly.

Paul's P.O.V.

Will and Lily were excitedly chattering about their day when he came back into the room with Holly.

_"Dad, we saw a big ship!"_ Lily giggled as William attempted to give her a piggy back ride.  
_"Yeah, dad it was enormous!"_ They both fell laughing in a pile, He sat down on the couch next to Mike,

_"He calls you dad?"_ Mike whispered, Paul nodded proudly.

_"How big?"_ He asked turning his attention back to the kids,

_"Probably bigger than Martha."_ Lillian assumed. He and Mike busted out laughing,

_"Really?"_ He snorted; they both nodded enthusiastically and went back to the game they made up.

_"Where did you lot head off to today?"_ He asked his younger brother,

_"Eh, just down by the ports, we took a swing uptown. Saw the sights, you know? What'd you two do?"_ Paul shrugged,

_"Took a nap."_ Mike prodded him,

_"Boring old man McCartney you've turned into."_ He remarked with a chiding laugh,

_"You'll get it soon enough, sonny."_ Mike nodded and they turned their attention back to the T.V.

Rachael's P.O.V.

After dinner was done and the kids were in bed. Paul's dad and stepmother came home and bid us goodnight. Ang and I were currently in the kitchen chatting, until Paul peeked his head in,

_"Ladies, do you mind if Mike and I duck out for a bit?"_ I looked over at Ang she agreed,

_"Go ahead."_ He put on a cheeky smile and blew kisses before running back to his brother like an excited little kid. Ang and I popped in a movie in the sitting room, quietly hanging out.

Paul's P.O.V.

He and Mike were walking around Liverpool chatting away, they headed uptown and were walking through the shopping district, they passed a few stores, and one in particular caught his eye.

_"Am I right?"_ Mike asked. Paul hadn't been paying attention.

_"Sorry missed that, what'd you say?"_ Mike repeated,

_"Oh yeah, definitely."_ They walked quietly for a while taking in the sights, he slowed down in front of the particular store nonchalantly glancing in. A grin crept onto his brother's face,

_"Are you going to ask 'er?"_ They had stopped in front of a jewelry store, one ring in particular had caught his eye. He shrugged,

_"I've asked 'er bout three times already, she keeps sayin' no."_ He let out a sigh,

_"Well, you could always get one for 'er you know. Just in case."_ Paul thought about it some,

_"That's actually not such a daft idea, lad."_ Mike nudged him,

_"Yeah, you can keep it just in case."_ Paul thought about it 'just in case' wasn't a good enough reason. He desperately wanted to marry Rachael, she was just too damn stubborn.

_"Let's just have a quick peek in."_ The two men walked in and looked around for a while, Paul found the ring that had caught his notice in the window. It was a sizeable chunk of a rock, maybe a bit too flashy, but certainly something stunning to look at.

_"I'd like to take a look at that one."_ He asked pointing into a glass case for the jeweler, the man took it out and handed it to him, Mike came around and whistled,

_"Quite the rock there lad, it probably weigh's more than her."_ Paul chuckled,

_"We'll need an armored car just to get home."_ The jeweler left them alone to discuss. Thankfully there were no other customers, as it was so late out. He examined the ring, he thought it was just about the most stunning thing he'd ever seen, besides Rachael.

_"Well, what do ye think?"_ Mike asked nudging him,

_"I don't know. She probably'll never say yes."_

Mike's P.O.V.

He really felt for the poor kid. Mike knew that Paul loved Rachael, actually more than any other bird that had ever been around, even Jane. Mike remembered when the two had split, he had to confess he was just the tiniest bit relieved, Paul wasn't himself when he was around Jane. He was a colder person, certainly not the same person that Mike had grown up with. Rachael on the other hand was an all around great gal. He didn't mean to sugarcoat it at all but, his brother never seemed more relaxed or at peace when he was around her and those kids.

_"She might."_ Paul continued to examine the ring then called the jeweler over,

_"I'll take it."_ He said firmly,

_"Congrats son."_ He clapped Paul on the back and Paul gave him a half-smile.

Paul's P.O.V.

_"Thanks. But you have to do me a favor?"_

_"What?"_

_"Don't tell her I bought 'er one. She's been on edge lately and I don't want her to get spooked and run off again."_ Mike put his arm around his older brother's shoulder,

_"Wouldn't dream of it, kid."_

He quickly paid for the ring and the two of them made their way back home, thankful that no one had recognized them. When they arrived a movie was on, Mike woke up Angela quietly and led her upstairs, Paul looked down at Rachael she was sound asleep. He knelt down next the couch and leaned over her, giving her a soft kiss, her eyes fluttered open,

_"'ello, sleeping beauty."_ She regained awareness and squinted her eye's with a smirk,

_"Oh, so you're the big bad wolf?"_ He chuckled,

_"Wrong story, love."_ She sat up and rubbed her eyes,

_"What time is it?"_ She asked quietly, Paul checked his watch,

_"'Bout twelve."_ She nodded and stood up and walked over to the stairs,_ "G'night ugly step-sister."_ She muttered, Paul was immediately amused he got up and followed her upstairs,

_"Ugly? I think ye meant Prince Charming?"_ Rachael shook her head and giggled,

_"I think I meant what I said."_ Paul followed her into the room, she rummaged through her suitcase and huffed,

_"Where are my night shirts?"_ She asked and looked back at him, he shrugged with an amused grin,

_"Dunno."_ She stood up and put her hands on her hips,

_"Paul, I'm not joking. I want to go to sleep. Where are they?"_ He laughed again knowing he had hid them earlier in the closet. He wanted her to keep wearing his button down shirts, they were dead sexy,

_"Dunno, feel free to wear one of mine."_ She huffed and gave him a smirk,

_"You're impossible."_ He shrugged and threw her one of his shirts from his suitcase, she went to the bathroom and came back flopping on to the bed and crawling under the covers. Paul shed his shoes and shirt and tried getting in as well,

_"No way."_ She mumbled sticking out her leg to block him, _"Go sleep downstairs."_ He watched her with complete disappointment but at the same time she was stealing his heart,

_"I can't. I already told you yesterday, if that monster get's you I'll never forgive myself."_ She flipped back over and stared straight at him,

_"I think I'll take that chance."_ He chuckled and tried climbing around her,

_"I can't let you. It's way too dangerous. He's a persuasive bloke that monster is."_

_"How so?"_ She asked trying to hide her amusement,

_"Well for starters he's extremely charming."_ He managed to get a foot on the bed but she shoved it away,

_"Oh really?"_

_"Yeah, I'm dead serious. He nearly ate me a few times."_ He put a hand on the bed, she pushed it off,

_"That's too bad. Maybe if you go sleep on the couch he won't try again."_ He chuckled and sat on the end of the bed,

_"Oh, he will. I swear it."_ She sighed,

_"Paul, I'm not joking anymore, go sleep downstairs."_ He noticed she seemed a bit annoyed,

_"Why, Rach?"_ She glanced up at him.

_"I don't feel so good."_ He instantly felt a little down. He hadn't noticed it before but she was still pale,

_"I'm sorry, love. I was just kidding."_ She nodded and put her head back down on the pillow, _"It's okay."_ He touched her foot and gave it a little squeeze,

_"Could I please stay up here?"_ He asked quietly full of hope,

_"Why?"_ She muttered,

_"The couch 'urts me back, and I want to make sure you're feeling well tonight. I promise, no funny business."_ She sighed,

_"Do what you want, I'm not in charge of you."_ He was quite sick of hearing that line but, was happy. He crawled up next to her and flicked off the light quietly settling in for the night.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I woke up in the middle of the night still feeling like absolute crap. I scurried out of bed and got a sip of water from the bathroom, thankfully my stomach had calmed down enough so I wouldn't be sick again. I got back into bed, Paul startled me,

_"Still feel like shite, ey?"_ I got back under the covers and stayed on my side,

_"Yeah."_ He scooched closer, and put a hand on my stomach,

_"It'll get better."_ He reassured, I really hoped so.

The next time I woke up was around 5 o'clock. I got up and threw on a dress and did the rest of my routine. I walked back into the bedroom and shook Paul's shoulder,

_"Wake up."_ I said, his eyes sleepily shot open,

_"Yer okay?"_

_"Yeah, but I've got to get back home. The court thing is in a few hours."_

_"Mmk."_ He clunked out of bed and headed over to his suitcase. I went and got the kids ready, we left while the rest of the household was still asleep. I nodded off in the car, Paul woke me back up when we were outside of the city,

_"What's the plan missy?"_ He asked,

_"I'm dropping the older ones off at Nan's, Holly has to come with me."_ She said.

_"Alright, I'm going with you too."_ I sighed, I was a bit unenthusiastic about him coming along. I knew he was trying to show he was responsible, but there were some things that he didn't need to know. Once the older two were dropped off we went to the courthouse. I got out with Holly and Paul quickly came in behind. We were escorted into a small office and the clerk held out paper work for me. The questions were extremely detailed, and personal, it didn't help that I had Paul looking over my shoulder.

'Name?', 'Rachael Noelle Belter.', 'Birth date?' 'March 9th, 1944', 'Citizen Status?', 'Dual Citizenship', 'Marital status?'

My heart skipped a beat and my pencil wavered over the paper, I quickly checked off the box, 'Divorced.'

Paul's P.O.V.

She must've checked off the wrong box he mused,

_"I'm sure they have an eraser around here somewhere."_ He noticed she didn't move, _"Rach?"_ She touched her shoulder,

_"Hey, did ya hear what I said?"_ She looked up at him,

_"Why would I need an eraser?"_ He pointed at the box,

_"You checked off the wrong box."_ She looked away and mumbled something,

_"What, I didn't hear you?"_ He asked his heart rate had sped up remarkably, she finally turned back towards him,

_"I didn't… I didn't check off the wrong box."_ She stated. He felt sick,

_"You're divorced?"_ She nodded,

_"You're not kidding are you?"_ She shook her head. He couldn't think straight.

_"Whe-"_ She cut him off,

_"Paul, I don't want to talk about it."_ He was lost. What the hell just happened?


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: In the next few chapters you're going to get an earful! Be prepared!**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

I managed to get back to the paperwork, Paul was staring at me with his mouth hanging open, I was sick of it. So what if I had gotten divorced? I was young and stupid when it had happened, and in all honesty it was absolutely none of his business. Holly was sitting on my lap as I was writing down information, she was in a great mood trying to grab the pencil anytime it got close enough. I finished up and put the forums on the table in front of me then looked down at Holly. She was reaching for my earrings,

"_Rach… what?"_ I looked up at Paul he was sitting there completely and utterly dumbfounded,

"_Paul, I don't want to-"_ The clerk came back in,

"_Follow me please."_ He said with an irritatingly sweet smile. I got up and grabbed the papers following him. He led us into the Judge's chambers,

"_Hello."_ He greeted, I walked up to his desk with Holly and placed the papers in front of her, he took a quick glance over them.

"_So, the baby is your niece?"_ I nodded, he looked back down,_ "It also says you are currently the guardian of two other children?"_

_"Yes, my own daughter, and my deceased friend's son."_ He nodded,

_"It also says you are divorced?"_ I cringed,

_"Yes it does."_ He nodded and motioned for the clerk to come over to him. They quietly deliberated for a few moments he looked back up,

_"Ms. Belter, do you have any other family?"_ I nodded,

_"Yes, back in the states."_

_"Do you plan on letting the child see any of them?"_ I nodded enthusiastically,

_"Oh yes definitely. I take the kids there every Christmas. That's part of the reason I want guardianship over Holly, it'll be easier for me to travel."_ He nodded and looked right up at me, his eyebrows furrowed a slight bit,

_"Who is that?"_ He asked pointing behind me. I turned around Paul brushed past me and shook the Judge's hand,

_"Paul McCartney."_ The Judge looked him over a few seconds and his eye's widened,

_"That's where I recognize you two from."_ I cringed Paul smiled, the Judge went back to the papers,

_"Ms. Belter, what were the grounds for your divorce?"_ I sighed I didn't see why it was important, but I figured it would be best not to argue,

_"Irreconcilable differences."_ He nodded,

_"So I'm assuming this was a no-fault divorce?"_

_"Yes."_ He nodded again,

_"Ms. Belter have you been in contact with the other party at any time, for any reason?"_ I nodded my head,

_"The union was for less than 6 months, but we remain to some extent in contact."_ He nodded again and went back to the clerk.

Paul's P.O.V.

He must've been dreaming. Rachael had definitely not told him any of this. Surely he had the right to know considering she had his daughter the entire time.

_"Ms. Belter, it also says here that you filed for an annulment but were not granted one?"_ She nodded,

_"I was the one who filed for it. We severed legal ties, and split up everything. No hard feelings. The lawyers didn't think so, though."_ The Judge gave her a smile. Paul felt sickly,

_"Sorry,"_ The Judge apologized,_ "We have to get this down on the records."_ Rachael gave him a small phony smile,

_"No trouble at all, sir."_ He went back to the insistent questions,

_"Ms. Belter, in the records it also says after the divorce you moved from America, to England. And filed for dual citizenship?"_

_"Yes, I did."_

_"You were through with all of the divorce proceedings before doing so, correct?"_

_"Yes. The union was entirely dissolved."_ He nodded and gave a stamp to the papers,

_"Now as for the child, this temporary guardianship will vie you certain legal powers. You are required to care wholly for the child. The child's mother and father may be in contact with you."_ She nodded,

_"And if neither of the parents contact you after 90 day's you may file for adoption."_ He noticed Rachael's jaw become rigid.

_"Thanks."_ She said weakly as the Judge motioned her over to sign papers. After a minute or so he shook her hand,

Rachael's P.O.V.

I signed off a mountain of paper's mindlessly, the Judge then shook my hand,

_"Congratulations, you are now the guardian of Holly Grace Anastasia Belter-Frank."_ I sighed, I was hearing that line much too often, the Judge then looked back at the papers and whistled,

_"Quite a lot of names for such a little girl, ey?"_ I smiled and the clerk led us out of the room. I felt a bit relieved, now I didn't have to worry about Holly as much as I did. Paul grabbed my hand as we were leaving the court house,

_"Care to explain?"_ He whispered, I was in no mood to do so,

_"Nope."_ I whispered back, we hurried over to the car, I was literally grateful no one had recognized us. We got back into the car, Paul didn't start it up, he was staring straight at me looking for an answer.

_"Well?"_ He said returning to his normal voice.

_"Drop me off at my apartment."_ I stated firmly. I wasn't going to fight with him.

_"No, you need to tell me what the hell just happened in there." _ I stared at him blankly,

_"You heard everything. Drop me off at my apartment."_ Holly started to fuss I rocked and hummed to her,

_"Paul. Drop. Me. Off."_ He shook his head,_"Fine."_

I got out of the car and grabbed my purse. I turned towards the street and started walking. Paul bolted out of the car and ran after me,

_"Where in the hell do you think you're going?"_ He asked through gritted teeth,

_"I'm going home. Where in the hell do you think you're going?"_ I said in a snit,

_"Jesus Christ, Rachael. You need to explain this to me, I'm completely lost."_ I shrugged my shoulders and continued walking he tried sidestepping me a few times but I just brushed past and went on my way,

_"I'm not the one asking questions. You're making a scene. Knock it off, people are going to recognize you."_ He gulped realizing I was right,

_"Quit following me."_ I stated, he shook his head. I completely shut him out of my mind and made it to my apartment building. He followed me right up to my door and tried coming inside.

_"Nope. Go home."_ I stated before slamming the door right in his face, before I could lock it he pushed in. I ignored him once again and went to put Holly in her room. I left her in the crib with a few soft toys. When I walked back out he was standing there in the middle of the room with arms crossed tapping his foot,

_"Well?"_ He said. I brushed past and went into the kitchen,

_"What?"_ I put on tea he followed me in,

_"You know perfectly well 'what'."_ I shrugged my shoulders,

_"Rachael don't play dumb, why didn't you tell me you were... married?"_ I instantly turned around on him,

_"Excuse me? Why didn't I tell you? Hmm…_ MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE IT'S NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS." Paul stood there nose to nose with his fists clenched,

"NONE OF _MY_ FUCKING BUSINESS?" He shouted his voice dripping in sarcasm and rage, "I THINK IT BLOODY WELL IS _MY_ FUCKING BUSINESS." I was completely fuming,

_"Go home Paul."_ I said quietly,

_"No. I'm not going anywhere. You haven't even started to tell me what went on."_ I went back to the tea,

_"It's none of your business."_ He was still boiling mad,

_"I think it's my business t' know who you've been **whoring** around with, 'specially since you had my daughter."_ I took in a breath completely shocked by what he had just said. He must have been surprised too because regret instantly filled his face,

Paul's P.O.V.

He couldn't believe what he had just said. He sure as hell didn't mean it, it just had slipped out. He couldn't think straight

_"I didn't mean it…"_ He stuttered

_"Leave"_ was all she said. It felt like a knife to his heart,

_"Rach-"_ She interrupted,

_"Go away. I'm not kidding."_

_"Sweetheart, I was just mad. I honestly didn't mean it, it just slipped out."_ He tried to explain. Her stare was blank,

_"I don't give a shit anymore. Go away and leave us alone."_ He started up again,

_"Rach- I'll.. I'll go get the kids and we can talk-"_ She shook her head,

_"Don't go near any of them."_ He was baffled.

_"What?"_

_"You heard me."_ She said calmly.

_"What about **us**?"_ She fixed her eyes on him,

_"There is no **'us'**."_ He felt like his head was about to burst,

_"Yes-"_

_"No, No there's not. Don't go near Lillian. Don't come near me. Just fuck off."_

_"When can I see her again?"_ She steered him towards the door and nearly pushed him out.

_"I don't know."_ She slammed it. Paul instantly felt sick to his stomach. He had lost them.

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**A/N: I've got some explaining to do, haven't I?**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: The next two chapters will tell you about Rachael's previous marriage, kay? It'll be alot of information so take it slowly! Reviews would be nice... hint, hint? :)**

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Paul's P.O.V.

The next month or so was the worst time of his life he felt himself spiral out of control. Rachael wouldn't look at him, let alone speak to him unless it was about the kids- and when it was, it wasn't for very long. Their situation was now what resembled an awkward custody agreement. He'd get to see Lillian anytime he wanted, as long as he called first. Most days after he was done at the studio he would go and pick her up to bring her to the park, or back to his house. Every single time she brought William with her, he loved the boy thoroughly like his own son. They would stay until dinner time, and then he would have to pack them up and bring them home. And every single time he did so, he could feel his heart breaking over and over again. They both would cry inconsolably and shout at him, it broke his heart,

"Daddy you said you wouldn't leave again." Lily would say each time. He would try to patch it up and put on a happy face,

"Honey, daddy isn't leaving. I'll see you again tomorrow." He would answer each time.

She and William would try to hang onto him as best as they could but each time he knew he had to leave. He occasionally saw Holly when Rachael opened the door, he would enthusiastically reach out for her, most times Rachael would shoot him a look and he would back away. He was entirely sick of it. The media had gotten wind of the situation and would hound him mercilessly. His life had practically gone to the shitter. John shacked up with some bird named Yoko who would intrude on every single one of their recording sessions, he and George would battle over the stupidest things, and Ringo just sat there like a child sadly watching his parents go through a divorce. He was sick of it. He couldn't get over the fact that Rachael wouldn't even look him straight in the eye. Not to mention she was pregnant, with his child.. children for that matter. Yes, there were going to be two. They hadn't told anyone yet. She informed him of it quickly in passing.

This brought him back to present day. He was sitting in his music room smoking, Martha was splayed at his feet, and the house was incredibly silent. The only noise came from outside where a terrible storm was brewing. He hated being here alone, he hadn't even thought about, let alone lay a hand on another woman since Rachael had left. The Beatles 'situation' was becoming shite. No one would admit it, but none of them wanted to stick around.

It was raining heavily now, he thought about the kids. Lily hated storms, she was scared to the core by lightening. His anxiety got the best of him he quickly dialed Rachael's new phone number,

_"Hello?"_ She answered. His stomach dropped,

_"Hey Rach, it's Paul."_ She was silent. He could hear the kids in the background banging about, and laughing. It tore him in two not being able to be there.

_"I was just-"_ He sighed,_ "I was just wondering if you were alright?"_ He heard her step off into another room,

_"Yeah. I'm fine, should I not be?"_ He let out a breath,

_"It's just the storm. I know Lily hates them."_ He heard Rachael call out for Lillian a few ruffled seconds later she came on the phone,

_"Daddy?"_ She shrieked,

_"Yeah."_ He chuckled he heard her call for William. The boys footsteps could be heard running next to her, they argued for a split second and then they had apparently decided to stick both of their heads next to the receiver.

_"Hi!"_ They both yelled,

_"Hey guys, what are you doing?"_

_"Mummy let us play Indians. Holly's on my team."_ He chuckled,

_"Having fun?"_ They both chattered excitedly,

_"Yeah, daddy what are you doing?"_ Will asked. He felt his heart drop,

_"Not much. Playing with Martha."_ He heard them both stop,

_"Daddy, can you come live with us?"_ He sighed,

_"Guys, we've talked about this."_ They both grumbled, he heard a crack of thunder,

_"Dad, could you come and see us?"_ Lily asked. Paul felt instantly awful, he knew she was scared.

_"Can you put your mum on the phone for a tick?"_ 'MUM PHONE.' He heard William holler, A rumpled moment later Rachael answered,

_"Yeah?"_ She asked.

_"Can I come over?"_ He held in his breath waiting for an almost immediate response,

_"Why?"_ He was actually surprised he was bracing himself for 'no'.

_"The kids asked."_ She sighed,

_"Do what you want, I'm not in charge of you."_ He got off the line and ran down the stairs throwing on a coat. He decided to take the car even though Rachael's new house wasn't that far away. She had moved about 5 blocks from him into a similar house. He sped the car over and ran up to her gate to avoid the rain. Someone buzzed him in and he walked up the drive to the door. Both Lily and Will flung the door open,

_"DAD!"_ They shouted and threw themselves at his legs they quickly ran back inside to continue their game,

_"Watch it darling!"_ Paul cautioned as a naked Holly came flying around the corner and wobbled straight into his legs. The baby landed on her bottom with a soft thud. Paul lifted her into his arms while Holly was still trying to decide whether she ought to cry or not. Rachael rounded the corner as well.

_"This little wanton ran right into me,"_ said Paul, shifting the toddler to his shoulder. Rachael nodded,

_"She just started walking."_ Paul grinned and bounced Holly,

_"Is that right?"_ He asked the toddler she gave him a drippy grin and held on tight. Rachael walked or how he saw it- slightly waddled- away and into the kitchen. It wasn't quite noticeable at yet but there was definitely a small bump under her clothes. Thankfully no one had caught on yet, not even the kids. Paul followed her. Both Lily and William were buck naked and fighting with swords next to the table,

_"Whoa!"_ Rachael called out. They both stopped, _"Where are your clothes?"_ They both gave her a smug look and pointed out the window. He glanced outside, there was a rather large mud puddle with clothes in it, he saw Rachael trying to fight off a laugh,

_"Why are they out there?"_ Both children looked down at their feet, not a moment later the gate buzzed, Rachael gave them a warning look, _"Stay there, don't move."_ Paul watched in amusement as she went to the front door and let the visitor in. A rather disgruntled man stood there covered in mud,

_"Can I help you?"_ Rachael asked in a confused tone,

_"Yes you can. Those two monsters you have threw sludge all over me."_ Rachael tipped her head to the side,

_"Why would they do that? More importantly, how? The security gates are quite tall."_ The man looked uncomfortable for a moment,

_"Well I was-"_ Rachael cut him off,

_"You were taking pictures, weren't you?"_ The man stuttered, but Rachael continued.

_"Well. I think they had a perfectly good reason to be throwing mud. It seems as though you were on their property, right?"_ The man loosened his tie and tried to hold the camera behind his back. She held out a hand. Paul was amazed how well she was handling this. The man reluctantly stepped away,

_"Well if you're not going to give me the camera, get off my property before I call the cops."_ She said with a nauseatingly sugary smile. The man looked uncomfortable for a moment then bolted out the gates. Rachael waited until he had left and pressed the 'close' button. She then turned back to Lily and Will who were still staring at their feet guiltily wile nudging each other in effort to keep their giggles quiet.

_"Go change into clothes."_ Rachael told them. They both looked up at her in admiration; the two goofballs probably thought that they were going to be punished. Paul kept in the same exact place watching this entire scene unfold. He waited until Lily and William scurried upstairs before he looked up at Rachael. She was staring back at him and they instantly both burst out laughing,

_"What just happened?"_ She choked out and bent over hysterically laughing. Paul felt his heart lighten, he couldn't control himself,

_"I have no bloody idea!"_

Rachael's P.O.V.

Where should I begin?

Well for starters I had made Paul leave. It was completely my decision. I packed up the kids and moved into a gated house somewhat near Paul's. I got on with my life, I had the house to take care of, 3 kids to take care of… or in a way 5. I was pregnant with twins. Paul and I's situation resembled a gauche custody accord, he could have Lily anytime he wanted as long as he called and had her back before dinner. She forced me to let William go with her, the two were still inseparable. Holly stayed with me basically 24/7 with the occasional visit to Nan's when I had too much going on. I didn't really speak to anyone, it wasn't like I even had the time. The kids were confused as to why Paul and I wouldn't speak to each other. They would cry when he had to leave and they would cry when I wouldn't go with them to Paul's house. I tried explaining it innumerable times, but both would get too upset. Holly was beginning to walk, unsuccessfully. She could only keep balance for a few seconds unless she held herself up on something. My sister still hadn't called about Holly, even though all my calls were being forwarded to my new number. My life was in a way, a confuted jumble. But it kept me occupied.

There was also another thing, Tessa's brother, Christian, came to help out. It also happened to be that he was my ex-husband. Dysfunctional? Maybe. I didn't tell Paul though. It was still none of his business.

Now in present time Paul and I were staring at each other laughing over some stupid thing Lily and Will had done to a reporter.

Paul's P.O.V.

He thought Rachael looked beautiful, Lily and William bounded back down the stairs dressed in pajamas.

_"Dinner, mum!"_ They both shouted. Rachael went over to the fridge. Paul placed Holly on the counter and went over to the two older kids helping them onto stool seats in front of the counter.

_"I want what Yiayia left."_ Lily stated. William agreed Paul took a seat next to the kids holding Holly in front of himself on the counter,

_"Who's Yiayia?"_ He asked William turned to him with a smile,

_"She's mum's mummy. She stayed here, she left yesterday."_ Paul nodded absorbing the information- he was a bit confused though, he thought Rachael's mum was dead?. Rachael warmed up whatever was in the container and dished it out on plates for the kids. He raised an eyebrow at Rachael; she mouthed **'I'll explain later.'** And went back to cutting up the food. The kids happily chatted and forked what they could into their mouths. They barely finished half the plates before they hopped off the stool's and ran to go play something else,

_"They've quite a bit of energy, ey?"_ He said eyeing her. She nodded and started to clean up. The tension between them was undeniable. He wanted desperately to fold her, and take her back, but she would probably kick him out. He was lucky enough she had even let him in her house.

_"So, who's Yiayia?"_ She finished and gave a Holly a sippy cup. The toddler attempted to get a majority of the juice in her mouth,

_"She's my aunt. She fills in as grandma since my mom's not around."_ He nodded. _"She visited from Chicago, left yesterday."_ Paul liked where this was going they were actually talking like civil adults,

_"Why do they call her Yiayia?"_ Rachael helped Holly with the sippy cup,

_"It's Greek for Grandma."_ He was a little surprised,

_"You're Greek?"_ She nodded and wiped off Holly's chin.

_"Do ya speak it?"_ She nodded again,

_"So do the kids, sorta."_ Paul was actually astounded, he didn't know that.

_"Well let's hear it!"_ He chuckled Rachael shouted something to the kids, it sounded completely foreign to him,

_"Seriously mum, do we have to?"_ Came the shouted response.

_"Yeah, like now. It's late."_ Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What'd ya tell them?"_ She started washing the dishes,

_"I told them to go upstairs and go to bed."_ He chuckled Will and Lily came tumbling into the room,

_"Why did you say it in Greekish?"_ Lily asked, both Paul and Rachael busted out laughing,

_"Greekish?"_ Lil nodded her head,

_"Isn't that what it's called?"_ William whispered something into her ear and she nodded,

_"Whoops. I meant Greek?"_ She said and looked over at the boy for reassurance, he nodded. _"Yeah, that's what I meant."_

_"Your dad wanted to hear it."_ The girl took this as a good enough excuse then whispered something else to her partner in crime, then turned back to them,

_"Mum, can we watch a movie instead?" _They asked. Paul looked over at Rachael she shrugged,

_"I guess. Only for a little while okay?"_ They both nodded and ran back to the living room. Paul turned his attention to Holly who was sitting in front of him on the counter trying to grab an unlit candle. Paul pushed it away from her, the baby looked up at him and made another grab for it. He caught her hand and gave it a kiss.

_"So.."_ He started looking up at Rachael who was busy writing something down, _"How've you been?_" She shrugged,

_"Fine. You?"_

_"Not the best."_ He mumbled.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't know how to respond to that. He was toying with Holly's hand. I was writing down a grocery list. It was nearly 10 o'clock, the storm outside had just about passed, and I could hear the kids talking about the movie in the living room.

_"Hey mummy, Uncle John's on the telly!"_ Lillian shouted, Paul and I gave each other confused looks. Paul picked up Holly and walked over into the living room, I followed close behind,

**-Beatle John Lennon and Artist Yoko Ono have been arrested at their Marylebone home for possession of marijuana late this afternoon-**

I looked back over at the kids,

_"Hey, go get into bed."_ They protested,

_"Mum you said we could watch a movie!"_ They both shouted at the exact same time,

_"Go upstairs, please."_ They finally gave up and scrambled upstairs together. I looked back at the T.V. Paul was staring at it completely dumbfounded. After a bit, it showed a clip of them being arrested, the officers were escorting them somewhere. I felt awful for them, even Yoko. She was clinging tightly to John, he didn't look much better.

_"Fookin' idiot."_ Paul muttered. After a while the news story changed Paul let out a sigh. I felt bad for him, this certainly wasn't going to reflect well on their band.

_"Bad day?"_ I asked awkwardly, he shrugged,

_"Bad month."_ The kids called for us, upstairs. We followed their voices; they were currently in my bedroom,

_"Mum, can we sleep in here tonight?"_ I shrugged,

_"Sure."_ They smiled happily and crawled into bed, I tucked them in and gave kisses. They looked over at Paul who was standing apprehensively in the doorway. Both kids pointed at their cheeks to be kissed. Paul chuckled and went over complying with their demands.

_"Good night"_ We called as we left the room.

Paul's P.O.V.

He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay and talk but he knew if they got into it, it would be an all out shouting match. He was after all, only here for e kids; or so he wanted Rachael to think. He missed her so bad it hurt.

_"I guess I'll be going then."_ He mumbled looking for his coat. Rachael didn't say anything. He found it she looked decidedly pale. She had a hand on her stomach. Paul noticed he was still holding Holly he put her down and she staggered away on her new walking legs,

_"Rach, are you alright?"_ He asked. She wasn't looking too well,

_"'M fine."_ She mumbled. Paul knew she was lying; she had the same look on her face when she was sick at his dad's house in Liverpool. He decided to call her out for her own good.

_"No you're not, are you sick again?"_ She shook her head,

_"Rach, come 'ead."_ He said quietly, _"Remember I told you to tell me if you're feeling unwell."_ She gave him the look. Paul wasn't about to back down,

_"'M fine."_ She repeated. He let out a sigh, she was definitely ill.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I wasn't one to complain about illness. A lot of people were worse off than I. But, this pregnancy was certainly taking its toll. I was nearly sick nonstop, I swear I spent more time kneeling in front of the toilet than anywhere else. When I had been pregnant with Lillian I had never even come close to being sick at all. In fact, it was practically like I wasn't expecting, there wasn't any morning sickness, and I felt completely normal. But now Paul was here calling me out on the spot. I was frustrated to say the absolute least. I felt my stomach clamp up again and I shut my mouth tightly biting my lip. He reached out for me, I couldn't move I was frozen in a sharp pain,

_"Go sit down,"_ He motioned to the couch. _"I'll take care of Holly."_ I waited a moment for the pain to subside. I carefully walked over to the couch and eased myself down. Paul was cooing to Holly as he took her upstairs.

Paul's P.O.V.

He found Holly's room and put her into the crib. He gave her a kiss on the forehead and stroked her baby soft cheek. He finally switched off the light trying to make his way back down to Rachael,

_"Uncle Christian?"_ He heard William call as he passed Rachael's Bedroom. He stuck his head in,

_"No?"_ He whispered,

_"Oh sorry."_ William whispered. Paul was instantly confused, who was 'Uncle Christian'?

_"Uhm it's daddy."_

_"G'night daddy."_ Both he and Lily whispered at the same time. Paul shut the door quietly, he was confused still, why had they called for an 'Uncle Christian'. The thought kept badgering his mind as he went downstairs,

_"Rach?"_ He called out.

_"I'm in the living room."_ Came a weak reply. Paul walked in, Rachael was sitting in the same position he had left her in. She looked a bit pale, but not as bad as before.

_"I put Holly upstairs."_ He said walking over to where she was seated.

_"Thanks."_ She said quietly. He sat down next to her and without thought grabbed her hand. This was the first time he had touched her in what felt like ages. He expected her to pull back though, it seemed like she was in too much pain to react. She just sat there and stared at the T.V.

_"Rach, I have a quick question."_ He asked,

_"Mm?"_ She replied looking back over at him.

_"Well, when I was upstairs the kids called for an 'Uncle Christian', do you have any idea what they were talking about?"_

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**_A/N: Ahh! A ton a stuff went on right? Same as the next chapter though. Reviewssss?_**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: I like this chapter. :)**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

My throat tightened a bit. Shit, the kids must've thought Paul was Christian when he passed the room. The last couple of weeks Christian had been here visiting on a business trip. He was from America and came here when he could to help out. There was absolutely nothing going on between us. There never had been.

When I was pregnant with Lillian we jokingly decided to get married. We both had been close as we grew up, and he wanted to help out with the baby. There wasn't anything even remotely sexual between us. He had just been a friend in a time when we both were in a tough spot. We barely made it 6 months married, by that time he had found someone he was sure he was in love with, and I had found Phillip. We parted ways, and he was occasionally around to see Lillian and William. Lily had never thought of him as a father, both she and William knew that he was just an uncle. He after all was Tessa's brother, and we got along famously, I didn't see the problem in him being around to help out occasionally. Sure, it was a complicated thing to understand, but it was how the ball had rolled.

_"He's uhm…"_ I stopped, how the hell was I going to explain this? This was the reason Paul and I hadn't talked to each other in around a month. _"He's my ex-husband."_ The look on Paul's face instantly fell.

_"What?"_ He said quietly. I finally let it go, and decided to explain.

_"Can I explain, and you have to promise not to be mad?"_ He nodded,

_"Yes he's my ex-husband and no, we are not together."_ Paul didn't react.

_"He actually is Tessa's little brother. We were married about a month after Lillian was born. We honestly were and are still good friends. The reason we got married was entirely a joke. He wanted to help out with the baby, so we did it. Nothing ever went on between us, nothing. The marriage lasted around 6 months. He had found someone he knew he loved, and I found Phillip. So we got a divorce. Now, he came in just about the time you and I stopped talking because I needed just a bit of help with the kids. He came to England for a business trip from Chicago, and wanted to see the kids. So of course I'm letting him. He is practically their uncle after all."_ Paul took in the information quietly, and Christ, if looks could kill. He looked sad and worn out. I probably wasn't any better. My stomach still was killing me.

Paul's P.O.V.

He took in all she had to say. It was a bit baffling, but it made quite a bit of sense.

_"Why didn't you tell me?"_ He asked quietly. This was the absolute worst feeling in the world. Someone else had been around all along, raising his own daughter- all of the kids- for him. She shrugged,

_"It really wasn't any of your business. And besides…"_ Her voice trailed off, he knew exactly what she was getting at. He had accused her of whoring around. He felt like a total bastard at the moment.

_"Christ."_ He muttered. The pair stared at each other for a while not really knowing what to say. He noticed she was trying not to wince but he could see her constrict her stomach.

_"Are you okay?"_ He waited a moment until she nodded her head. _"Do you need me to call the doctor?"_ Her eyes widened,

_"No. I'm fine."_ He let out a breath, he sincerely didn't know what to do.

_"No you're not. I can see it Rach, it's written all over yer face. Here."_ He slowly reached out and put a hand on her stomach, she scrunched up her nose and held her breath. He little by little he inched up her shirt until it was over her small bump. He was appalled to say the least- there was a fairly deep purple and black bruise somewhat over the bottom of her ribcage; he took his fingers and pressed lightly on it.

_"Ouch."_ She mumbled faintly while tightening her muscles even more. He didn't know what it do, it certainly looked excruciating.

_"How?"_ He asked calmly, he surely didn't want her to see that he was exceptionally worried.

_"I don't know."_ He looked up at her, she was definitely telling the truth,

_"When?"_

_"Last week."_ He scooted a little closer, it was beyond doubt not normal.

_"'nd have you seen the doctor?"_ She shook her head almost reluctantly._ "I'd like to take you to see one."_ Her face instantly became stone,

_"I've already told you,"_ she said, _"I'm not sick."_ He looked up her with saddened eyes, deciding to call her out.

_"You are sick, Darling."_ He insisted and looked down at her stomach again and she slightly narrowed her eyes at him,

_"No I am not Paul."_ He ran his hands through his hair letting out a frustrated sigh,

_"Rachael, I'm not going to sit here and argue with you. Yer ribs 'er fuckin' bruised and you don't know how it happened, that's not okay."_ She looked furious. Fighting mad. She got up from the couch without even looking at him.

_"Paul."_ She said quietly, _"I think you need to go home. Now."_

_"'M not going anywhere."_ She ignored him and went about with her business, _"Rachael, quit ignoring me, we both know there's something wrong."_ He followed her into the kitchen where she wrote something else down on the piece of paper she had before.

_"Well maybe there is. But you and I fighting isn't going to fix it."_ She said calmly,

_"Good, let's stop fighting then."_ She shrugged,

_"Good, go home."_ Her words hit him like a ton of bricks.

_"Why do you have to argue with me about every single bloody thing?"_ He stated,

_"I'm not arguing. I just think that you need to leave before one of us says something we regret."_ Then she brushed past him to lock the back door,_ "Not that I would regret it."_ She mumbled. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

_"So what am I supposed t' do if you get sick again?"_ She locked it and went over to the sink.

_"Nothing. I've dealt with it by myself for about a month. I think I can manage."_ She was so fucking stubborn.

_"Rach, I don't want you to be here alone since you're sick."_ She shook her head,

_"I'm not going to be alone. Christian will be here in a bit."_ He noticed her shift uncomfortably to her other foot and her jaw go rigid, but she continued washing the dishes,

_"Rachael. I can see yer feeling horribly."_ She didn't say anything, _"Can I please just take you to see a doctor or something?"_

_"I don't need a babysitter, Paul."_ He was tired of the endless fighting,

_"Listen to me."_ He looked at her, she wouldn't even look him in the face. _"Rachael, look at me."_ She didn't look up. It was like dealing with an angry child, no actually- dealing with a child's temper tantrum was immensely easier than dealing with her.

_"Stop treating me like I'm a fucking child, Paul." _She stated coldly.

_"Well then quit acting like it!"_ He hissed. She took her hands out of the soapy water and pointed towards the front door.

_"Go."_ And that was all she said.

_"No. I'm staying-"_ She tried to interrupt him but he held up a hand and continued, _"Now, we can either wait until this Christian bloke gets here, or we can call Ritchie and Mo to watch the kids. Your choice."_ She stared blankly at him. He was just as shocked as she was. _"Well?"_ She said nothing and leaned back against the counter with her arms folded and a smug look on her face.

_"Fine. I'm calling Ritchie."_ Paul walked over to the phone and picked it up, watching her the entire time. He dialed, and the two just stared at each other.

_"'Lo?"_

_"Ritch. It's Paul."_ The line was silent for a moment,

_"Are you calling about John 'nd Yoko?"_

_"No. I don't want to talk about that. I need to ask you a favor?"_

_"Sure..?"_

_"Well it's a long story, but Rachael and I have to go somewhere. Is there anyway Mo-"_

_"She's on 'er way. What's 'er address?"_ Paul quickly told him and gave thanks before hanging up. He never took his eyes off of Rachael for a moment. She was unquestionably tough. This reminded them of the fight they had before they had left for Greece. They didn't say much. For the next twenty minutes they just sat there and stared at each other. He didn't even know where to begin. He heard the gate ring and looked up at Rachael,

_"What's the code?"_

_"06-18-63."_ Paul walked over and let Maureen in. Within a matter of seconds she was through the door and looking for Rachael,

_"Hi, love!"_ She gushed running up to her. The two women embraced,

_"Rach I think we should-" _Paul started but Mo waved him off and the two girls went back to whatever they were discussing.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"Hi, love!"_ Mo gushed, and sprinted over towards me. She pulled me into a tight embrace, I winced a little bit,

_"Hey!"_ I said trying to return the same enthusiasm.

_"My goodness! Where in the world have you been?"_ Mo started in, _"I haven't even talked to you since you and Paul left Greece. Paul said you were feeling unwell? Ugh!"_ She nudged me, _"It's probably all that drinking we did!"_ She exclaimed with a mischievous smile. I nodded and returned the phony smile.

_"I have so much to tell you. Wait, where are you and Paul going?"_ She asked completely oblivious to our situation. Neither one of us had told anyone else what was going on.

_"I'm such an idiot, I forgot something at the courthouse, we both have to go pick up papers."_ I lied. She smiled even wider,

_"Oh my, that's right!"_ She giggled,_ "Ritch told me that you had adopted William!"_ I nodded and smiled, she pulled me into another hug, I glanced up at Paul over her shoulder. His face was completely ashen. He was just leaning against the wall waiting patiently. Then Mo shooed me towards Paul,

_"Go on! I've got the kids!"_ Then she pointed upstairs, _"They're up there, right?"_ I nodded and smiled,

_"Thanks so much for coming on short notice."_ She waved me off,

_"No problem at all, see you two!"_ She flitted up the stairs. I thanked God for the fact that Mo was so understanding. She truly was a great friend. I hadn't even spoken to her in a month and she acted like we had just hung out yesterday, she was truly twice the person I'd ever be. Paul grabbed my hand and led me out the door. His car was waiting in the drive, he opened the passenger door and basically watched me like a hawk until I got in. I wasn't going to admit it, but I was terrified of hospitals. I knew that the doctor's office wasn't open, and Paul was probably going to take me to the emergency room. I was too tired to fight anymore, and my stomach felt like someone was trying to saw into it with a rusty spoon.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was just about to pull out of the drive when he spotted another car coming into the gates.  
_"Stop the car."_ Rachael said quietly. Paul watched as she got out and opened the gate, walking straight up to the car. He watched as the person rolled their window down and she bent over to talk to them through the window. It took her nearly 5 minutes. He waited patiently. After doing so, the car pulled away and Rachael got back into his car. He waited until she was comfortable before pulling away.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"Stop the car."_ I said quietly. Paul did as I had asked, and I got out to go open the gate for Christian's car. I walked up as he rolled down his window,

"Hey Rach, what's going on?" He asked crinkling his light blue eyes. He certainly looked quite a bit like William, afterall he was his biological uncle.

_"Uhm, would you mind staying at the apartment tonight?"_ I asked quietly. He must've noticed how shitty I looked,

_"Is that Paul in the car over there?"_ He asked gently. He knew about the situation. He was the only person I told I was pregnant. I nodded,

_"Rach, doll, why are you upset? I swear to God if he did anything I'll go beat the shit out of him for you."_ The Good old Chicago attitude.

_"It's nothing. I'll tell you later."_ My stomach clamped up again, and I put a hand on it. He scanned me over,

_"Where are the kids?"_

_"My friend I told you about, Maureen, is in there right now with them."_ He nodded,

_"Where are you going?"_ I shook my head,

_"I'll explain later."_ I pulled the apartment key out of my bra and handed it to him, he took it and looked at me apprehensively,

_"Alright. I'll be waiting for your call. Love ya."_

_"Love you too."_ I gave him a brotherly peck on the cheek and waved him off before returning to Paul's car. I got in wordlessly and he pulled away.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was on his way to the emergency room, he hated attracting attention to himself in this kind of situation but he couldn't help it. He was holding onto the steering wheel so tight his knuckles were turning white, he had to relax a little. He glanced over at Rachael, she looked like death. He decided to break the tension.

_"So was that Christian in the car?"_ He already knew the answer.

_"Yes."_ She said quietly. Paul nodded and continued to drive, every so often checking up on her. He didn't want to admit it but he was worried out of his mind. The bruise on her ribcage was huge, it looked like someone had taken a bat and swung at her midsection. When they pulled up, he got out and ran over to her side of the car holding out a hand for her. She ignored it and stood up herself. He slammed the door and locked it while catching up with her. He placed a hand on the small of her back, she acted like she was being shot at, and sped up. He matched her speed and kept his hand there. After they had gotten in, Paul had managed to grease the palms of a few nurses who willingly brought him and Rachael to a private room as to avoid any unwanted attention. After a few tense minutes of waiting a doctor walked in and shook hands with Paul,

_"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Manning."_ Rachael shot him a look. Paul had signed in under that pseudonym anytime be brought Rachael anywhere. The doctor obviously knew who they were but kept his knowing smile under guard.

_"What seems to be the problem today?"_ Paul folded his arms and looked over at Rachael. She rolled her eyes and turned back to the doctor with a phony smile,

_"My **'husband'** over here seems to think there's something wrong with me, isn't that right, **'sweetheart'**?"_ she answered with a sweet voice while gritting her teeth and shooting Paul a death glare. The doctor raised an eyebrow. Paul managed to keep his steadily growing smile under wraps, my god she was such a smart ass, even when they were in a difficult situation.

_"Yes dear, go 'ead show the doctor what's the matter."_ Paul said in an equally sugary tone. Rachael gave him the look but slowly lifted up her shirt until the bottom of her ribcage could be seen. The doctor let out a whistle,

_"You've got quite the bruise there, lass."_ He said taking a closer look, _"How did that happen?"_ Rachael shrugged her shoulders,

_"I don't know. It happened last week."_ The doctor nodded and went through the usual questions,

_"Are you pregnant?"_ She nodded he pressed down a little on the bruise and Paul was sure she was going to pass out.

_"Have you been vomiting lately?"_ She nodded again, _"How often?"_ She looked at Paul, he had an eyebrow raised,

_"About two or three times a day."_ The doctor nodded again, Paul was astounded, she hadn't told him it was that bad.

_"Does it hurt to breathe?"_ She nodded, the doctor took out a stethoscope and listened for a few minutes.

_"Are you sure you weren't hit, or you haven't had any serious falls?"_ She shrugged her shoulders,

_"Not that I know of."_ She said quietly. The doctor went back to the bruise.

_"Ms. Belt- err.. I mean Mrs. Manning, I think you've busted a rib."_ Rachael tilted her head to the side, as did Paul; both waiting for an explanation.

_"Well you see, since you've been vomiting so often, the pressure of your muscles contracting could've had enough force to literally crack your rib. I'm nearly sure that's it. I cannot do an x-ray because you're pregnant, but from what I've felt, it is broken."_ The doctor wrote something down on the clipboard and stood up,

_"I'll be back in a moment, I need to go put this in the file."_ He excused himself and left the room. Paul let out a breath, at least they knew what was going on. He glanced over at Rachael, she was picking at her nails,

_"So, do you still feel sick?"_ Paul asked quietly. She didn't even look up at him. He could feel the shell he had put around himself the past month begin to crumble. Why couldn't they both just apologize and be together again? _"Well, I'm glad you came."_ He said quietly. She twirled her hair a bit and pretended to be interested by something across the room. He saw her wince a bit when the doctor came in to wrap up the bruise,

_"Hey doc."_ Paul motioned for him to come over to where he was seated. The doctor walked over, _"Can you get 'er something for the pain?"_ They both glanced over at Rachael.

_"She's too damn stubborn to admit it."_ Paul said quietly. The doctor understood and called in a nurse giving her an order for some type of medicine.

They asked Paul to wait outside while they finished up. There wasn't much the doctor could do for a broken rib, they couldn't get an x-ray to see where exactly it was broken. So they gave her a sedative, and were finishing up wrapping a pack of ice where the bruise was. Rachael was half asleep sitting in the examination chair when the opened the door to give him final instructions.

_"Mr. Mann-"_ The doctor let out a sigh and gave him the **'do I really still have to play along anymore? I know who you are'** look. Paul shook his head and the doctor continued,

_"Mr. McCartney, I'd like you to get her home, and watch her carefully. She said she's been sick more than twice a day, and that's a bit of concern. We've given her some fluids, just bring her back if she still is sick in the morning, alright?"_ Paul took in all he had to say and nodded.

_"Oh and one more thing,"_ Paul looked back up,_ "She may be a bit… out of it from the medicine."_ The doctor chuckled as he left the room. Paul looked inside at Rachael, she was staring at her hand like it was the most exciting thing in the world. She heard him walk in and looked up at him her eyes were swimming and she had a silly grin on her face.

_"Did they give you medicine, love?"_ He asked quietly trying not to laugh at how tripped out she looked. She nodded and looked back at her hand.

_"Colors."_ She mumbled and giggled. He could see it hurt her to laugh, but she certainly didn't seem to mind, she was off in another world.

_"Rachael, would you like to go home now?"_ He asked slowly. She looked up at him and laughed. Paul chuckled as he held out a hand or her. She latched on and stood up,

_"Oop."_ She put a hand on her ribs, _"My tummy hurts."_ She informed him seriously. Paul nodded and smiled,

_"That's why we came to the hospital, sweetheart."_ She looked him over and laughed.

_"Oh!"_ She exclaimed._ "Have you seen them too?"_ Paul chuckled,

_"Seen who?"_ She shook her head,

_"I have no idea."_ Rachael started laughing as Paul led her out the back entrance of the hospital. He was quite amused, she was without a doubt strung out on meds. He turned the car out of the parking lot, her head was dipping up and down, he glanced over at her,

_"Sweetheart, you can go to sleep if you're tired."_ She shook her head,

_"Not tired."_ He nodded, she went on to tell him how beautiful everything looked, and that she swore she had an extra foot. Paul watched the entire time- she was hilarious. When they got back to their house he parked in the driveway and went around to her side of the car to help her out. He brought her up to the house and watched while she reached in her shirt and fumbled around in her bra,

_"What are you looking for, Rach?"_ He asked watching, she giggled and pulled out a key,

_"I keep my keys in here, boobs come in handy."_ Paul stifled a laugh as she handed it to him, and he opened the door,

_"Go lay down in the living room, okay?"_ She nodded and practically floated over,

_"Mo?"_ He called out, Maureen came out from the other direction,

_"Hello Paul!"_ She said walking over, _"Everything alright?"_ He nodded,

_"Thanks for watching the kids."_ She smiled,

_"No trouble at all, they slept the entire time! Where's Rachael?"_ Paul decided to lie, he didn't want Maureen to know that Rachael was practically high,

_"She went to sleep in the living room, she's not feeling too well."_ Maureen's look softened,

_"Is she alright?"_ Paul nodded,

_"She'll be fine in the morning."_ Maureen smiled,

_"I think I'll get back home then, call if you need anything."_ She gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek and then left.

_"Paul?"_ He heard Rachael call out,

_"Yes?"_ He shouted back while he pulled off his coat and put it on a bench in the hallway,

_"I like cats."_ Paul busted out laughing. This was hilarious, she was totally strung out and spouting nonsensical comments. He decided that he was going to stay the night for the sake of Rachael.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Hey guys! Alright, this chapter is short, but i'll be updating soon! Reviews!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He walked back over to the living room and saw Rachael. She was currently lounging on the couch watching the T.V. and giggling at every single thing.

_"Hey Rach?"_ It took her a second before she looked up, _"I'm staying the night, okay?"_ She smiled and tilted her head and looked a bit confused,

_"Why?"_

_"Uh.. well, I just thought I'd keep you some company?"_ She nodded and went back to the T.V.

_"I didn't notice."_ She said,

_"Didn't notice what, love?"_ She glanced back over at him,

_"You have a beard now!"_ He chuckled and touched his cheek,

_"Yeah, I do."_

_"I like it."_ She said smiling.

_"Ta."_ He went over to the couch and took a seat next to her. Her eyes were still swimming and her head was still dipping a bit. But she looked extremely happy. He heard the front gate buzz, and not a moment later the front door opened,

_"Rachael?"_ Paul heard an unfamiliar voice,

_"I'm in the living room!"_ She shouted back and giggled while trying to compose herself. They heard footsteps thumping and finally a man appeared. He was tall, had dark blond hair, and was holding up a key. Paul had to admit he looked quite a bit like William, this must be Christian. He glanced over at Paul and his jaw went rigid and back to Rachael with a confused look,

_"I think you gave me the wrong key, Rach."_ He said in a thick Chicago accent while staring intently at Paul. Rachael got up and went over to him taking the key,

_"Whoops. I'll go find the other one."_ Both men watched her walk out of the room. Paul stood up and walked over to him while extending a hand,

_"Paul McCartney."_ Christian took hold of his hand and shook it with a tight intimidating grip holding on a second longer than was necessary,

_"Christian Walters."_ They let go and stared at each other, _"So you're Lily's father?"_ Paul nodded proudly.

_"Yes, and you're William's Uncle?"_ He nodded while eyeing Paul up and down, they both heard Rachael laughing and a cabinet squeaking, Christian raised an eyebrow,

_"What's the matter with her?"_ Paul chuckled,

_"You didn't see the bruise?"_ He shook his head,

_"What bruise?"_

_"Rach, come 'ere please for a moment."_ Paul called out. Rachael peeked her head around the corner,

_"Yeah?"_ She giggled,

_"Can you show Christian your bruise?"_ She nodded and walked over lifting her shirt enough so he could see it. Christian's eyebrows shot up and whistled,

_"That's a pretty one, what happened?"_ He asked nervously. Rachael waved him off and returned to the kitchen,

_"Paul can explain!"_ She shouted. Christian must've been surprised by how flippant she was acting because he turned to Paul looking completely bewildered.

_"She broke her rib."_

_"How?"_

_"Doctor said she broke it from getting sick."_ His eyebrows knitted together,

_"Yeah, I've noticed she's been sick lot… being pregnant and all."_ Paul nodded, through the awkward pause,

_"She told you?"_ He nodded,

_"She's told me a lot."_

_"Oh." _Paul said awkwardly. They heard Rachael laughing extremely loud,

_"Why is she…"_ Paul knew what he was talking about.

_"Doctor gave her some medicine. A bit too much apparently."_ He nodded and turned back to the kitchen,

_"Rach. Paul and I are going outside to have a little chat. We'll be back in a minute."_ Christian shouted, Rachael gave him the 'okay' and Christian nodded towards the door.

_"Come. We need to have a chat."_ Paul felt like he was being led to the electric chair, he gulped and followed him outside.

Christian closed the door behind them and pulled out a pack of cigarettes,

_"You smoke?"_ He offered one to Paul. He nodded and took one,

_"Ta."_ Christian pulled a lighter out of his pocket lighting his own and Paul's'.

_"So. As you know Rachael is a very important girl in my life."_ Paul nodded taking in what he had to say,

_"And I'm very protective of the things I love."_ Paul gulped, this bloke was very intimidating, and he spoke like he belonged in the mob.

_"Rachael's father died. So, I've been there to look out for her. Even married her once."_ Christian informed him while flicking a stray bit of ash,

_"Yeah, she told me."_ Paul replied nervously.

_"So you must know I'm Tessa's brother?"_ Paul nodded. _"Smart guy. Listen, she told me everything that went on between you two, and I'm not taking sides."_ Paul let out a sigh of relief.

_"But."_ He said stubbing out his cigarette, _"If you ever hurt her again, I'll break your fucking balls and mount over my fucking fireplace, **understood**?"_ Paul nodded quickly.

_"Good. I'm staying at the night at my sister's old flat."_ He made the sign of the cross, _"God bless her soul. You take care of Rachael. Don't make any mistakes."_ He clapped Paul on the back and went inside, retrieved the key and walked back out past Paul,

_"Take good care of her. I'll be watching, buddy."_ He threatened before getting in the car and pulling out of the drive. Paul let out the breath he had been holding, that was probably one ofthe most nervewrecking conversations of his life.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Alright, this chapter's really short, but I swear the next one will be way longer, kay?**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He stubbed out the cigarette and waited for the gates to close. He took a breath and walked back inside, my god that guy was a complete asshole. He let it go though, he obviously cared about Rachael.

_"Rach?"_ He called out, there was no reply. The kitchen lights were off, the only noise came from the T.V. He walked in, she was laying on the couch while staring at the ceiling obviously not as giddy as before. She looked over at him and gave him a half smile,

_"Hey"_ He walked over and picked her legs up so he could take a seat.

_"Paul, can I ask you a question?"_ She questioned in a serious tone, he looked her over, she had come off the high and seemed like she was back to normal,

_"Sure."_ She took a breath and it seemed as though she was collecting her thoughts.

_"Why do you hang around?"_ He didn't catch on to what she meant,

_"Hang around, where?"_ She looked over at him, something was definitely troubling her,

_"I mean… why do you even deal with me anymore?"_ He nodded and took it in,

_"Because I know we're in this together."_ Paul replied quietly,

_"I'm sorry for being awful."_ She apologized gently. He took a hand and put it on her leg,

_"It's fine, I know you've been hurting."_

_"No its not fine. You've been nothing but great around the kids. And me. And all I've done was give you shit the entire time."_ He didn't know how to react, but she kept going, "_I've been a complete asshole. You took me to meet your family, you've taken care of the kids. You've even chased me down when I was acting like a complete witch."_ Paul was surprised at what she was saying,

_"And you've done it all without a single complaint. I mean sure we argue about everything, but you never left."_ He couldn't help but feel a pang of regret, he had left her when he thought she was cheating on him in Greece.

_"Rach, we've both done things we regret."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

It finally hit me how much of a horrible person I was. He had done nothing but care for me, and try his best to help out, and I had acted like a total bitch. There was no excuse for my behavior, I let out a sigh. Where would it go from here? He must've been thinking the same think because we just stared at each other completely lost.

_"So."_ He said quietly.

_"Yeah."_ I replied not knowing what to really say.

_"Rach, what if we started over?"_ He said looking up at me,

_"What do you mean?"_ A small smile appeared on his face,

_"I mean what if we just started at the beginning, like nothing ever happened?"_ I thought about it for a minute,

_"But everything did happen."_

_"You're right."_ He sat back on the couch and looked thoughtful, _"How 'bout if we got everything out on the table and we decided where to go from there?"_ I was a bit apprehensive,

_"Everything?"_ I said quietly,

_"Everything."_ He stated firmly.

_"What if you don't like the stuff I might tell you?"_ I asked,

_"I could ask you the same question."_ I took a minute.

_"Where would we start?"_ He shrugged,

_"The beginning."_ I raised an eyebrow,

_"Like Hamburg?"_ He nodded a little,

_"I'd like t' start there."_

_"That's like 5 years, it's going to be a long story."_

_"I like stories."_

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**_A/N: Right then, I'll go write some stuff and post it later, deal?_**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Alright, sorry I took so long for me to update, my laptop charger was busted, and I had to order a new one! Oh, and sorry this chapter kind of sucks, they get better okay?**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

I picked at my nails for a moment, not really knowing what to think. Maybe getting everything out in the open would be a good thing.

"So?" He asked raising an eyebrow. I let out a sigh,

"Alright. When?" He shrugged,

"We could start right now." I nodded, he looked thoughtful for a moment,

"So we were together in October of '62 for like 3 weeks… and then you left." He ran a hand through his hair, "Where did ya go?" I swallowed and began my story,

"Well, remember how I was supposed to meet you at the club for your gig?' He nodded,

"You didn't show up. I nearly went mad. John told me to knock it off, and that you probably were still getting ready." I nodded,

"Well, I found out I was pregnant, and left." He sighed avoiding my eyes,

"Why?" he muttered, this was going to be harder than we had both thought.

"I know you're probably not going to agree, but a baby would've been a distraction." He shrugged,

"We could've made it work." he said quietly. I shook my head,

"What happened, happened. I cant change that I left." We were silent for a moment,

"Rach, I had people out looking for you." I raised an eyebrow an he continued, "I went nuts. You didn't tell anyone where you had gone, I nearly had Eppy call the police." My cheeks flushed in embarrassment. I hadn't known that. He sighed, and repeated what I had just said,

"What happened, happened, we cant change that." I nodded. He went on to tell me what had gone on with the rest of the tour. We had moved the discussion on the floor, sitting next to each other with our backs propped up against pillows.

"And so then Lily was born?" He asked grinning, I nodded.

"It was literally right before I was supposed to go home to Chicago. I was with Tessa and it happened. So I stayed here for about a week then went back." He chuckled.

"Did it hurt?" He had a cheeky grin on and he was staring straight at me,

"Do you want the truth?" I asked with a smirk, he nodded,

"Honestly, it felt like shitting a knife." He busted out laughing and made a disgusted face,"Rach, that's nasty." he managed to choke out through laughter. I shrugged,

"You asked!" After we had quieted down, he looked me over,

"Do you think I can see her birth certificate?" He asked. I nodded and pointed up to a box on a shelf on the opposite end of the room. He got up grabbing the box and returned sitting Indian style before it. He began pulling the documents, pictures, and Lily's old baby things out. He managed to grab the birth certificate at the bottom of the box and looked it over. Paul stared at it for a while then slowly looked up at me,

"You put my name down?" He questioned softly. I nodded. He glanced back down at it blinking fiercely, I could tell that he was trying not to get emotional.

"Thanks." He said. I gave him a half smile, After a bit he put the things down, and returned them to the shelf. He sat back down as I glanced up at the clock, it was nearly 2 in the morning. I yawned a little, his eyes were starting to droop as well. I flicked the T.V. on and grabbed a blanket from behind me,

"You're staying tonight?" I asked glancing over at him. He nodded,

"If that's alright with you." I nodded. He settled back down onto his pillow and finally fell asleep. The pair of us had managed to get through '62 and '63, we still had a long way to go.

I awoke to Paul pulling the blanket from me chuckling. I pulled back,

"Give it, 'm cold." He mumbled. I stuck my foot out and tried to rip it away. He rolled over and tugged it as hard as he could. I held on tight and wrapped myself up in it, he started laughing again, "Rach, 'm cold, please?" He pleaded. I shook my head with my eyes still closed.

Paul's P.O.V.

He watched her and chuckled, still half asleep, a thought then struck him.

"Rach." He touched her shoulder and shook her a little,

"What?" She mumbled.

"I forgot to feed Martha." She opened one sleepy eye and surveyed him.

"What time is it?" He glanced up at the clock abpve the telly,

"Only 3." She groaned plopping her face back in the pillow.

"G- shd- mm-" She mumbled he chuckled,

"What?" She turned her face and glanced over at him,

"Go feed her." He sighed, he didn't want to leave, but he knew had to. He stood up and rubbed his eyes,

"What are you doing tomorrow err- today?" He noted the time.

"Nothing, why?"

"Come to the studio with me." She shook her head,

"I've got three kids to take care of."

"Bring them." She shook her head,

"Holly's not going to be happy with the noise." He thought about it for a moment,

"Drop her off at Nan's and bring Lily and Will with you." She closed her eyes again,

"Why?" He shrugged remembering how often each George, Ritch, and John had asked about the kids and Rachael.

"The lads want you too, they keep giving me mickey about it. Besides, it'll only be for a little while. We can go get dinner after, and go on with the talk." She finally nodded,

"Kay. Give Martha love for me." He chuckled,

"More love for the dog, than for me?" She laughed,

"She's way cuter." He sighed,

"I'll pick you up in the afternoon then, yeah?"

"Yeah. Don't forget to lock the gates." Paul made his way out the door feeling a huge weight being lifted off of his shoulders. That was the first time in nearly a month and a half that they had had a discussion without it ending in a shouting match. Maybe things were starting to go his way.


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: The next couple over chapters get really good, this one is alright, I suppose. Stay tuned! **

**BTW: Thanks for the reviews! :) They help a lot!**

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**R**achael's P.O.V.

I woke up around 9, doing my usual routine, then getting Holly all ready. I had already phoned Nan about watching Holly for a few hours while Paul took the older kids and I into the studio. She wholeheartedly agreed, I could truly tell she loved having little kids around to keep her occupied. Something had been on my mind quite often though, Nan was getting older, and we were depending on her quite a bit to care for the kids. I phoned Maureen with my concern, and she quickly handed me off to Marianne, Zak and Jason's nanny.

"_Well actually, I might have someone you want to meet. My nephew Jude brought his American girlfriend, Lucy, with him back home. She's actually looking for a job right now, maybe she'd be a good fit, I can have her stop by today, if that's alright with you?"_ I thought about it for a moment,

"_That would be great, when can I expect her?"_

_"Actually she can be down there in half an hour, will that do?"_

_"Yes, that'd be perfect, thank you Marianne!"_ She hung up, I was surprised with my good luck. I went upstairs and woke up Will and Lily,

_"Hey guys, mommy has a friend coming over to meet you, okay?"_ They nodded sleepily and ate their cereal.

Exactly on time the gate rang and I let the visitor through. A bubbly blonde girl walked up to the door confidently,

_"Hi, I'm Lucy Carrigan!_" She introduced. I shook her hand,

_"Hi, I'm Rachael Belter, I heard you were looking for a job?"_ She nodded eagerly,

_"Yes I am, Marianne told me it was a part-time nannying position?"_ I nodded,

_"Come on and meet the kids."_ I led her inside and into the kitchen, immediately both Lily and Will looked up interestedly,

_"Guys, this is mommy's friend Lucy."_ Lily and Will got up to meet her, instantly I knew they were going to be a great fit. They led Lucy over to their toys in the living room and she got down to their level playing with them. I watched for a moment, knowing she was exactly what I was looking for. I looked at my watch, it was nearly 10 and time to drop off Holly,

_"Lucy?"_ She looked up with a smile. _"I have to go drop the baby off, can I leave the kids here with you for a trial?"_ She beamed,

_"Take your time."_ Then she got back to their level continuing the game. I took Holly and dropped her off at Nan's, when I arrived home the kids were still having a great time with Lucy. I motioned her over,

_"So, do you think you'd like a job?"_ She smiled,

_"Of course, they're such great kids!"_ I noted her accent,

_"You're from America, right?"_

_"Yeah, I'm from New York. I came over here with my boyfriend, Jude, to see his family."_ I instantly liked her just a bit more knowing she was an American. Prejudiced, I know.

_"Fantastic, listen, you know the 'situation' we're in?"_ She nodded, I was talking about the whole Paul being Lillian's father, and stuff,

_"Yes, it's all over the papers back home, and here. It's a bit hard to miss."_ I nodded,

_"Do you think you can handle that?"_ She grinned,

_"Of course."_ I let out a sigh of relief.

_"Alright, thank-you, can I call you later to make a schedule?"_ She nodded and grabbed her coat,

_"Talk to you later! Bye kids!"_ The kids waved spastically to her before turning back to the toy cars. I let her out and returned to the living room to get the kids ready.

Paul rang at the gate as I was pulling a shirt over William's head,

_"Lily go press the blue button next to the door for me, please?"_ The naked little girl nodded and ran over to the door. A moment later I heard Paul walk in,

_"Where are your clothes, love?"_ He chuckled.

_"Mum has them, she's in the living room with William."_ Not a moment later Paul walked in carrying Lillian. He gave me a grin,

_"Hello."_ William wiggled out of my grip and ran over to him, Paul put Lily down trading kids with me. I pulled a dress over Lillian's head.

_"Hey."_ He chuckled as William began telling him what we had done today. So far I had dropped Holly off at Nan's and had had an interview for a nanny. Not a full time one, just someone to help out when things were getting a little cramped.

_"A nanny?"_ Paul asked William, he nodded.

_"Yeah mum had her come over earlier, she's real pretty. Her names Lucy!"_

_"Yeah, she even talks like mummy too!"_ Lily piped in. I giggled and raised an eyebrow,

_"What do you mean she talks like yer mum?"_ Paul asked. In unison both Lily and Will pinched their noses and put on their best American accents. We both laughed and I went back to work readying the kids. I braided the front of Lily's hair in to sort of a head band. As soon as we were done, Paul took charge,

_"Go get into my car, okay?"_ He asked addressing Lily and Will, they both raised an eyebrow,

_"Where are we going?"_ They asked simultaneously.

_"You're coming to work with daddy today."_ Lily looked back at me,

_"Are you coming too, mummy?"_ I nodded,

_"Go get in the car, we'll be out in a minute."_ William grabbed her hand and the pair scurried out the door. I started picking up the mini mess in the living room,

_"Nanny?"_ Paul asked handing me a discarded shirt,

_"Yeah. Just to help out when we're both busy. She's really sweet. American too."_ He nodded taking the information in,

_"Did you already drop Holly off?"_

_"Earlier."_ I took the pile of clothes into the laundry room and threw them into the basket. Before we left I packed two sippy cups for Lily and Will, and we rushed out the door.

When we arrived at the studio both of the kids were asleep. When the car stopped Will woke up and scooted out of the car. He held my hand as Paul picked up Lily. We got inside and the secretaries cooed over the kids,

_"They're precious, Paul!"_ An older one said before nudging him,_ "You need to start bringing them around more often!"_

A rather nice looking Aston Martin pulled up to the front of the studio, William turned his attention to the door when George walked in,

_"Hello!"_ He called before coming over to great Paul, Lily and I. He then noticed William whose eyes were still focused on the car,

_"Is that your's?"_ The boy asked never taking his eyes away from it, George got down eye level with him,

_"Yeah, Mate, are you William?"_ The little boy nodded. _"You're Lily's uncle?"_ George nodded,

_"You like the car?"_ Will nodded fiercely,

_"Yeah, it's gear."_ Paul and I watched them completely dumbstruck. George and the boy began discussing it in detail, I had no idea William was into cars that much, after a few minutes George looked up at me,

_"Can I take him for a spin?"_ I shrugged my shoulders,

_"Sure."_ George picked up Will, scurrying out the door, and I looked up at Paul who was chuckling,

_"Geo really does love that car more than life itself."_ I sighed, Lily was still asleep. We bid goodbye to the secretaries and Paul led me over to studio two. We crept in John was sitting there with a rather small Japanese woman, that must've been Yoko.

_"Hello!"_ Paul greeted, Lily wiggled down from his hold and ran over to John,

_"Uncle John!"_ She shouted, John pulled her up into a hug, and I walked over.

_"Hey."_ He smiled,

_"'ello Miss Rachael, long time no chat."_ She looked over to the woman beside him, _"This is Yoko."_ I smiled and shook her hand. I couldn't see why Paul disliked her, yesterday he had made a few snide comments about her, honestly she seemed like a nice woman.

_"Rach."_ Paul called me over and patted the seat next to himself on the piano bench. I listened as he began messing around. Ritch came in a while after, followed by George with William. Will and George were still discussing the car, attached to one and others hip, while ignoring everyone else, I looked over to Lily who was now sitting in Yoko's lap having a discussion with her. Paul nudged me in the side and I looked over at him, he was smiling. Lily hopped off of Yoko's lap and toddled over to me,

_"Sippy cup."_ She said. I reached into my purse and handed it to her. She walked back over to Yoko and the two continued their talk. Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"They seem to be getting along."_ He observed quietly. I nodded. John came over and he and Paul started going through songs, apparently their new album, 'Yellow Submarine' was going to be released soon. I got up and went over to Yoko and Lily taking a seat next to them,

_"I have a daughter, about her age."_ Yoko said turning to me with a smile, I nodded,

_"Really?"_ She smiled even wider,

_"Yes, her name is Kyoko. She is with her father right now."_ I smiled, Yoko actually was a very nice woman. Lily crawled back onto Yoko's lap, leaning against her,

_"If she's bugging you-"_ I started, Yoko turned to me,

_"Oh no! She's just fine. She can stay here with me."_ I nodded and went over to Will and George. George had him seated on his lap holding the neck of the guitar in a G chord,

_"Okay, now strum."_ George instructed. Will made an attempt and was surprised when the noise came out, he looked up at me with wide eyes,

_"Mum. I played."_ He stated completely proud of himself, I laughed,

_"Good job, Willy."_ The pair went back to their conversation and I continued on my journey to Ritch.

_"All over here by yourself?"_ I asked. He looked up from the drum kit with a smirk,

_"I'm not alone anymore, you're here!"_ I giggled and took a seat next to the kit,

_"How've you been?"_ I asked,

_"I should be asking you that question!"_ Ritch chuckled, _"I haven't seen you since we were in Greece. Mo keeps givin' Paul and I shit 'bout talking to you."_ I giggled, you have to love Maureen.

_"Sorry,"_ I giggled, _"Things have been busy lately."_ He nodded and handed me a tool to hold while he fixed a part of his equipment,

"_Paul told me you two have been going through a rough patch."_ Ritch said. I nodded,

_"He's been a wreck lately."_ Ritch informed me quietly,_ "He 'nd John 've been goin' at it."_ I looked over at the two men who were seated at the piano bench discussing something privately.

_"Really?"_ I said weakly,

_"Yep. I'll be happy when we get out of 'ere next week for break. Literally, all they've done is argue. I try t' keep out of it."_ I felt a little guilty. I had been so wrapped up in the kids, that I hadn't even asked Paul how the whole Beatles thing was going.

_"What are you and Mo doing over break?"_ He chuckled,

_"Shaggin'"_ He muttered, I swatted at him, and he chuckled, _"Nah, well yeah… but probably just goin' on holiday or something, what about you and Paul?"_ I shrugged,

_"We just started talking again yesterday."_ I confessed quietly, he looked over at me with an eyebrow raised,

_"That explains why you 'aven't been round."_ He reached for the tool which I handed to him,_ "What happened, if yer don't mind my askin?"_ I figured I could tell Ritchie anything, he was trustworthy. I doubted he would go around spilling it to others,

_"Well… you know I left Greece."_

_"Yeah, Paul said you were feeling unwell."_ I shook my head,

_"No we had an argument."_ He glanced at me with a look of surprise waiting for me to go on, _"It was a bad one. So we didn't talk for about a month, he got Lily and Will part time."_ A sudden realization crossed Ringo's face,

_"That why he kept havin' to duck out early."_ He looked thoughtful, _"Why did you start talkin' again?"_

_"I got sick and you know… he dragged me to the hospital and all that. So I guess we're kind of in a weird place now."_ Ritch let out a sigh finishing his repair,

_"He cares 'bout you."_ He sat back up on his stool behind the drums, _"He wouldn't be after you if he didn't. Give 'im a chance, and take care'v yerself missy."_ I got up and gave Ritch a peck on the cheek,

_"Thanks Ritch."_ He nodded and I went back over to the piano. Paul looked up at me expectantly,

_"You were over there for a long time."_ I shrugged,

_"Just had a talk. Ritchie's still my favorite."_ He let out a sigh and smiled,

_"Just keep breaking me heart Rach… just keep breaking it."_ I looked for the kids again. Lily was still with Yoko and Will with George. It was around 4 now, time had really flown.

_"What do ya think of this?"_ Paul asked playing out a melody, I listened carefully,

_"It's nice, what is it?"_ He shrugged,

_"I thought about you when I wrote it."_ He stated softly, a flash of embarrassment touched my cheeks, thankfully Lily toddled over and crawled onto Paul's lap.

_"Play."_ She demanded. Paul began playing and then stopped,

_"Now you."_ He instructed. He touched a few keys and then waited for her.

Paul's P.O.V.

He watched as Lily copied his exact movements touching each key he had.

_"Good."_ He played a slightly trickier one, she did exactly as he did. He went a third time. She played it a little slower due to her tiny hands and short arm's, but sure enough she did it perfectly, he looked to his side at Rachael who had a surprised expression on her face. Paul was amazed that the little girl could copy him to a point. He was proud, and grinned with another feeling of love washing over him. He pecked the top of Lily's head, breathing in her still-baby scent of honey and lavender. He remembered the first time he had met her, and how he never knew how much you could love a person until that moment.

Rachael's P.O.V.

After a while the boy's had finished up their session, it was now around 7 and we were saying farewells. I nearly had to rip William away from an equally as reluctant George,

_"Bye Uncle Georgie!"_ Will called from over my shoulder, George waved,

_"Don't listen to yer dad, okay?"_ George said sarcastically, William put a smirk on and giggled naughtily,

_"Thanks Geo."_ Paul chuckled. Lily was in his arms waving goodbye to Yoko.

The four of us got back into the car, Lily spoke up,

_"Mum, we want pancakes for dinner."_ I looked over at Paul. He smiled,

_"What kind of pancakes?"_ I asked turning my head,

_"I want you to make them."_ I giggled,

_"Honey, I've never made pancakes for you before."_ She let out a sigh looking out the window,

_"I want a sandwich then."_ Paul chuckled,

_"We can get a sandwich. Will, what do you want?"_ Paul asked,

_"I want a car."_ Paul and I busted out laughing,

_"You can't eat a car, honey." _I reasoned, the little boy looked unconvinced,

_"I want a sandwich, too then."_

Paul pulled into a restaurant parking lot and we went inside. Ordering quickly Lily and Will went back to their own conversation. Paul looked over at me,

_"Where did we leave off?"_ He asked quietly.

_"'64."_ He nodded,

"You first." I messed with the napkin in front of me collecting my thoughts.

_"My parents… died in January. I got divorced… you already know that. Then Tessa called and told me to move here, so I did."_ I let out a breath, it was hard talking about the past. He had his chin in his palm listening intently,

_"Rach, what happened to your parents?"_ I sighed, we did have to get everything out on the table.

_"Dad was shot."_ Paul nodded that story had made headlines, I cringed remembering it. Some lunatic pulled a gun out on him, and went to town._ "Mom had cancer."_ Paul tilted his head to the side,

_"What kind?"_

_"Breast cancer."_ A cloud came over his eyes, I knew exactly what he was thinking, his mom had died from it as well.

_"Horrible disease."_ He added quietly. I nodded, fidgeting with my hands. I wasn't one for making a fuss over death. I knew it happened to everyone, whether it was their time or not. Deep inside I still wanted to kill the man who had shot my dad, but doing that wasn't going to bring him back. My mom on the other hand was sick for a long time, and had told no one. After dad died, she jut went on peacefully knowing he was waiting for her. It comforted me a bit to know that they were both together.

_"What happened, happened."_ I shrugged, _"What about you?"_ He came back into reality.

_"'64... We had the American tour. And the Australian tour. We were really busy. We did the movie."_ He looked around,

_"Wasn't too bad. No one got hurt."_ He let out a sigh, the waitress came back with our food. Lily and Will shared a sandwich, I had soup and Paul had Pasta. I picked at mine, still listening to his account of the year. He glanced up at me,

_"You eating?"_ I looked down and noticed my soup was still untouched. I took a spoonful and he continued talking. After a while he had finished the year. Neither one of us had noticed but Lily and Will were fidgeting in their seats,

_"Mum, let's go."_ They whined. I pushed my soup away, and helped them with their coats, then looked back at Paul, he got the bill. And we went back out to the car.

We picked up Holly and the way back and finally pulled back up to my house, and we got out.

_"Bath time!"_ I sang. Both Lily and Will high fived ripping off their clothes not even through the door yet. Holly was wiggling out of my hold eager to join the older kids. She had a bit of trouble considering she wasn't that great of a walker yet, and she couldn't figure out how to unbutton a onsie.

_"Here."_ I said as we got through the door, I handed her to Paul and he held her up as I unbuttoned her. Once thoroughly unclothed he steadied her on the floor and she wobbled off into another room. Paul chuckled,

_"Why are they always naked?"_ I rolled my eyes,

_"I swear to the lord they're all going to be nudists when they grow up."_ He busted out laughing.

I gave Lil and Will a quick bath before ushering them off to bed, Paul came in with Holly and gave them kisses good night. I took Holly and went back to the bathroom refilling the tub for her bath. I put her in and kneeled next to it watching as she played with the toys. Paul came in and knelt next to me,

_"So are we done with '64?"_ I nodded,

_"'65 then?"_ He took over telling me about his year. I listened as I splashed water on Holly then finally took her out putting her in a dry towel, he followed me talking as we went downstairs.

_"Mo and Ritch got married, we still were performing…"_ He got quiet for a moment, _"Can I tell you a secret?"_ He asked seriously. I finished putting a diaper on Holly and looked up at him.

_"Sure."_

_"That was the first time I took LSD."_ I nodded. I had secrets of my own,

_"And?"_ He looked thoughtful,

_"It was pretty. But scary. Definitely wouldn't do it again."_ Holly was chewing on a stuffed elephant. He got serious again,

_"Rach.. Have you ever…"_ He trailed off and I nodded. He looked surprised, I knew exactly what he was getting at.

_"Well you obviously know about the pot… we did that together. And as for LSD, yeah, I did it once."_ I shrugged, _"Didn't like it."_ He focused his attention back to Holly who handed him elephant,

_"Ta, love."_ He said. She crawled over back to the toy pile and played around, Paul looked over at me,

_"How was that year for you, then?"_

_"Busy. Lily was walking and talking. A huge handful. I don't know. We were just busy."_ He nodded, my year had been pretty uneventful. I got up and went to the kitchen bringing a bottle back for Holly. I handed it to her and she made an effort trying to do it by herself. Eventually she was on her back with the bottle held up, seemingly making it work.

_"So what did you think about today?"_ He asked breaking the silence.

_"I had fun, thanks."_ He smiled,

_"Lil and Yoko got along swimmingly."_ I nodded, I couldn't really read the expression on his face. _"Well, what are you doing tomorrow?"_ He asked. I thought about it for a moment.

_"Lucy has the older kids. Holly has a doctor appointment."_ He looked worried for a moment,

_"What for?"_ I shook my head,

_"Just a checkup."_ He looked relieved,

_"Rach… has your sister called yet?"_ I looked down at the carpet.

_"No. I'm starting to wonder though, its been nearly 2 months."_

_"What are you going to do?"_ I traced a design on the floor and shrugged,

_"I guess when the 90 day's pass I'll file for adoption. No one has called with any news about Daniel or Kelley so I assume they're fine."_ I bit my lip, that had been eating away at me for some time. Holly needed a stable home, and I was willing to give her one.

_"Where do you think they are?"_ He questioned softly.

_"Honestly? I have no idea. She wouldn't give me a straight answer on the phone. I guess I'll just take care of the baby until she or Daniel comes back."_ He nodded. Holly had finished a quarter of the bottle and flung it away. Paul grabbed it and reached out to hand it back to her. She wouldn't take it and instead crawled over to the elephant. The pair of us watched her for a while lost in our own thoughts,

_"How about if I picked you two up tomorrow and you came over for lunch?"_ He proposed. I thought it over for a moment,

_"Alright, see you then."_ He leaned crawled over giving Holly kisses on the cheek and she giggled sloppily. He then got up and I led him to the door, we stood there awkwardly for a moment before he pulled me into a hug,

"See you tomorrow." Paul said walking out.


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: This chapter is sad... I don't like it, but the next couple are wayyyyy more eventful. Review it pleasee?**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

Holly's doctor appointment went well, she was perfectly on track. Lily and Will were with Lucy, she had taken them to the zoo for the day, they wouldn't be home until late. Paul had called earlier telling me to wait for him after the appointment, he was going to be picking me and Holly up to grab lunch at his house. I thought about it some, the situation was still weird. Neither of us knew where we stood, I think talking was making it a little better though, thankfully neither of us had gotten into an argument. We were just being truthful with each other, it was a start.

Paul's car pulled up to the curb and I exited the building, he held open the door for us as Holly and I got in before returning to his own side.

_"Everything good?"_ He asked, I nodded with a smile bouncing Holly on my lap.

_"Everything's perfect."_ He smiled,

_"Are Lily and William with Lucy?"_

_"Yep, she took them to the zoo today."_ A short while later we pulled up to his house and made our way inside. He put on tea, and I sat down at the table sitting Holly on it and giving her a few crackers to chew on. Paul brought the tea around and sat on the opposite side smiling at Holly who held out a soggy cracker for him, he took it and popped it into his mouth without hesitation,

_"Ta, love."_ The baby took one and popped one into her mouth as well mimicking him. Paul chuckled then looked up at me.

_"'66."_ He started, _"That's where we left off, you first."_ I thought about it for a moment,

_"We were still living here. I was with Phillip, Lily turned 3. And then I got the secretary's job."_ He nodded,

_"Why did you take the job, you didn't need it?"_ I nodded,

_"I know, it was something to do to keep busy though."_ He took this as a good enough answer. He got up and went over to the stove, something was cooking,

_"Mrs. Grady left soup."_ It smelled alright, but I wasn't hungry. A flashback of my morning sickness repressed my appetite. He brought over a bowl for me and a bowl for him, then sat down digging in,

_"What about you?"_ I stated.

_"George and Pattie got married, bought the farm up in Scotland, we went to Tokyo, then we pretty much stopped touring."_

_"Why?"_ I asked,

_"Well you know, it was kind of like living in a fish bowl. People shouting at you everywhere you went. I wanted to keep going, the other lads wanted to stop."_ He shrugged, _"What happened, happened."_ I nodded for him to keep going,

_"It was pretty much after we went to th' Philippines. They were fucking barmy over there. Apparently we snubbed them by not meeting up with the first lady and they pulled a nutty. I swear, I thought they were going to butcher us."_ He chuckled looking up,_ "So then we did the whole Candlestick Park concert, and called it quits."_ I smiled, and swirled the soup around with my spoon. Holly was still busy with the crackers.

_"What about you?"_ He asked.

_"Not alot, like I said."_ The phone rang and Paul got up to answer it,

_"'Lo?"_ He listened for a moment,

_"Are you seriously going?"_ He sighed,

_"Do I have to?"_ I turned my attention back to Holly, _"Rach?"_ Paul called, I glanced back raising an eyebrow,

_"What are you doing Friday night?"_ I thought for a moment, that was two days from now.

_"Nothing, why?"_ He went back to the conversation still staring at me,

_"Yeah, she's right here, wait lemme ask."_ He took the phone off of his ear,

_"Will you come with me to this charity dinner?"_ I looked a little apprehensive, then put the phone back to his ear listening for a moment then taking it away,

_"Ritch says he wants to bring Mo, but she won't go unless you do."_ Paul chuckled, He listened to the phone again,

_"Yeah one second."_ He held out the phone for me,

_"It's Mo. She wants to talk."_ I laughed and we switched sides, he took my seat keeping a hand on Holly so she wouldn't fall of the table and I took the phone,

_"Hello?"_

_"Rachael, I'm begging you, I'm not going unless you go with Paul!"_ Maureen shrieked, I busted out laughing,

_"Why?"_

_"Because! I'm not gonna know anyone! Besides, I need to borrow a dress. **PLEASE**."_ She shrieked again, I giggled,

_"I don't know."_ I looked over at Paul, he was pretend pouting,

_"Come 'ead!"_ He whispered,

_"Hand the phone to Paul!"_ Maureen ordered, I held it out for him and we switched positions, I went back keeping a hand on Holly.

_"Yes?"_ He held the phone away from his ear and winced, I could hear Mo shouting at him even from across the room, we both busted up laughing.

_"I know, I know. She's a hard one to please."_ He looked back over at me and winked, mouthing** 'please'**.

_"Alright one second, quit yer squealing!"_ He took the phone away from his ear,

_"Rachael, come 'ead. Mo won't stop yelling at me until you come."_ I finally relented and threw up my arms,

_"Okay, I'll go!"_ He grinned and I could hear Maureen cheering from her end, Paul finally quieted her down and hung up letting out a breath.

_"So you'll be my date?"_ I laughed and shook my head,

_"Maureen's my date."_ He chuckled,

_"Too late, she's going with Ritch. You'll have to be mine."_ I sighed trying to hide a smile,

_"I suppose."_ We got back to talking about '66 and before we knew it, it was nearly 5 o'clock. I packed Holly up and he led me to the car,

_"Tomorrow."_ He said, _"We can finish the talk."_ I nodded, we had actually gotten through these talks pretty quick with each of us learning about each other's past. Sometimes it had been difficult, and awkward, sometimes even embarrassing telling each other secrets. He dropped me off at my house, Lily and Will were still out, and Holly started fussing,

_"Give 'er."_ He said as we pulled up to the front. I handed her over as we got out. He started whispering something into her ear, and miraculously she stopped crying. I was taken by surprise and Paul looked over at me confidently. Before whispering something else to her. The baby let out a small giggle and a drippy smile. He walked us to the front door,

_"How did you do that?"_ I asked thoroughly amazed, he shrugged,

_"Holly's me best little girl, I told her a secret."_ I laughed,

_"Do I get to know the secret?"_ He shrugged his shoulders,

_"Maybe one day."_ He brought the baby back inside and spread her out on the living room floor. The minute she touched the carpet she passed out. I went back into the kitchen, he passed me on his way out,

_"I've got to head to the studio, can I stop by later to say g'night to the kids?"_ I nodded, he grinned and waved on his way out.

Eventually Lily and Will came home with Lucy and we all sat around having dinner.

_"Lucy showed us the Zebra's, mum!"_ Will exclaimed, Lily nodded taking another stab at her noodles,

_"She's the best babysitter ever."_ I smiled, thankful that they were getting on so well. I heard the gate buzz and both Lily and Will nearly tackled each other to get it,

_"Its daddy, could we open it?"_ Lily shouted.

_"Yes."_ I called back. Not a minute later Paul was through the front door scooping them up and bringing them back to the table. He plopped them down in their seats while they told him about their day. Lily's face was absolutely covered in sauce. I got up grabbing a wet rag and walked over to her,

_"And we saw'd a hugeish tiger **df-s-f-s**"_ She continued talking while I was wiping her face, _"So we got to watch them, and see the turtles."_ Paul grinned at her,

_"I take it you like Lucy?"_ Both children nodded fiercely and repeated what they had said earlier,

_"She's the best babysitter ever."_ Paul looked up at me. I couldn't read the expression. He got back to talking with the kids helping them finish their meal. After a while they became tired and marched to the living room to watch T.V. I began cleaning up the dishes and Paul helped,

_"So, '66."_ He continued where we had left off, handing me a dish to wash. I plunked it in and started wiping it.

Paul's P.O.V.

He wanted to keep talking for as longs as possible. It would mean being closer to the kids longer… and Rachael. He knew they were in a tough spot right now, and he hated it. Thankfully, she had agreed to going to the charity dinner with him on Friday. He said a grateful little prayer thanking God for Maureen and her persistent begging. He listened to her end of the story for a while laughing at times, and patiently waiting as she went through the rough parts. She was talking about that Phillip bloke, Paul resented him in a way,

_"Rach"_ He said looking for the words,_ "Did you actually love him?"_ She glanced up at him from the dishes studying him for a moment, then finally shook her head.

_"No, I don't think so. I guess we were kind of together because it was something to do."_ He nodded and let out a sigh,

_"Tell me about Jane."_ She said quietly. He mentally cursed out his past. He didn't want to have to talk about her, but if they were both being honest, he guessed this was the way it had to be.

_"Well you know… she was everything I never had. She was smart, sophisticated, and her family was great. I guess in a way she brought me up."_ She nodded returning to the dishes letting him go on,

_"She was busy though… really busy. And I- well I was an arse."_ He let in a breath remembering the earlier year. _"We got engaged, because that was what was expected of us. But I- I really don't think I was ready. She caught me."_ Rachael raised an eyebrow and he looked down at the dishtowel in his hands.

_"Francie… she was a mistake. I think in a way it was meant to happen though."_ Rachael looked up at him,

_"How so?"_ He took a fork and dried it,

_"Well, you know sometimes when things are goin' mad, and it's all too much?"_ She nodded, _"I think I was glad in a way that Jane caught me with Francie because it was kind of a checkpoint, you know? It was a wakeup call. Someone calling me out fer once. So she left, I honestly don't blame her at all. We were just too different of people."_ He sighed watching Rachael for a long moment, she didn't look angry or judgmental, she was just listening.

_"Can I tell you something?"_ She nodded,

_"Jane and I really didn't want th' same things. I started looking around and noticed everyone moving on, you know Ritch had a family, George and Pattie were together, 'nd John found Yoko. Jane wanted her career, and I had mine. She wasn't sure if she wanted to ever have a family."_ He picked up another dish flicking excess water off of it,

_"So I was sitting there with me thumb up me ass, you know, thinking: is this the way it's going to be then? So then I got caught. It was a feelin' of freedom. I didn't have to stick around with her anymore, and we both moved on."_ Paul let out a sigh, he hadn't told anyone that, ever. Rachael was still cleaning the dishes. It was nearly 10 now.

_"Rachael, what are you doing tomorrow?"_ She finished washing and handed him a final dish to dry,

_"I don't know yet."_ Paul nodded, he still didn't know where the hell there were. These talks were going to end soon, where would that leave them?

_"I'd like to keep talking tomorrow, if that's all the same t' you?"_ She nodded, he felt relieved, she wasn't mad about the Jane and Francie thing. _"Does Lucy have the kids tomorrow?"_

_"Yeah, she has all three of them."_

_"Can I pick you up in the afternoon or something?"_ She nodded again. He put away the final dish, and knew it was time to go. He hated this part of the day. Saying goodbye to the older kids was tough. He walked slowly back to the living room where Lily and Will were sprawled out in front of the telly, he watched them for a moment trying desperately to remember every single detail about them; please don't grow up without me; he thought.

_"Guys, I have t' get going."_ They both looked up at him with an instant pout crossing their faces. They reluctantly got up and toddled over for hugs, He pulled Will up into one the little boy was surely upset. He put him down at the boy walked away, then he pulled Lily up into one, she mumbled something into his chest, Paul pulled back a little looking down at her sad dark brown eyes,

_"What'd you say, love?"_ the little girl looked down at the floor.

_"I said, I hope it rains again."_ He was confused for a moment, he knew she hated storms.

_"Why?"_ The little girl leaned back into him,

_"'Cuz, last time the thunder got scary, you came back to see us."_ Paul felt his heart splitting in two. He sighed,

_"Honey, daddy will see you again tomorrow, I'm not going anywhere."_ He saw a tear slide down her soft little cheek, _"Please don't cry."_ He pleaded. She looked away and sulked. Paul looked over at William the boy was lying back on the floor covering his head with a pillow. He could see the lad's little body shake a tad, he knew instantly that he was crying too.

Lillian's P.O.V.

She and Willy didn't understand what was going on. When they went to Greece everyone was happy. Mummy and Daddy stayed with them in the hotel. Then one night mum told them that they had to leave with her. Dad didn't come with them, for a while they only got to see daddy during the day. He would take them fun places, but he would have to drop them off at mum's house later. She hated storms, it was too loud. It reminded her of the day after she met daddy and those people chased them. But two days ago when a storm came daddy called and came over and made it all better. She didn't want him to go, neither did Willy.

Paul's P.O.V.

He took Lily over to the couch, taking a seat. Then leaned over and pulled the pillow off of William's head and picked him up as well cuddling the pair on his lap. He honestly didn't know what to do,

_"Shhh, please don't cry."_ He cajoled. He picked up each of their chins so their tear stained faces were looking directly at his,

_"Listen, I'll be back tomorrow, okay? No one's ever going to change that. I promise. Yer mum's here, you have to be good fer her, alright?"_ They both nodded slightly, the last few tears escaping their eyes. He pulled them back into a tight hug, never wanting to let go. He knew he finally had to. He gave a final kiss to each and wrapped a blanket around them before getting up.

_"Love you two."_ He mumbled quietly on his way out. Holly bowled into his legs and he picked her up,

_"'Ello Miss Holly!"_ He said putting on a cheerful face. She smiled and said some nonsense words,

_"Is that right?"_ He asked playing along. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and a tight squeeze,

_"You be good too, alright?"_ He put her down and she went off again. He peeked his head into the kitchen and watched Rachael wiping off the table for a moment,

_"I'll see you tomorrow."_ He called she nodded without even looking up and he left.

He got to his empty house.

Alone.

The silence was killing him.


	28. Chapter 28

Rachael's P.O.V.

The kids were downstairs with Lucy, I had to admit, she was a savior. They kids adored her, and she dealt with them perfectly. Today she was going to take them off to an art fair, I readily agreed. This was a great for the kids, they got to go out and do normal things, and they went pretty much unrecognized when neither Paul nor I were around. They had the best of both worlds. When they were home I got to be with them and give them a great home life, with Paul's time added. When they were with Lucy, they got to do regular kid things. I hoped one day the media attention would die down just a tad. Recently reporters had been snooping around my gates, and apparently they were worse at Paul's house.

I finished putting on my makeup and throwing on a dress, I could hear the kids downstairs. Lucy was making them breakfast before they went out. I walked back into the kitchen and immediately was taken by surprise.

Lillian and Will were buck naked standing on the counted covered in batter. Holly was naked sitting on the floor licking a spoon. A light dusting of powder, and milk were drifting off the counter, it looked like a breakfast hurricane had hit the kitchen. Lucy was standing there mixing something in a bowl.

_"What happened here?"_ I giggled. Lucy looked up blushing a little,

_"We're making pancakes!"_ Both Lily and William shouted. Holly banged the spoon on the floor.

_"Sorry about the mess! I'll give them a quick bath before we go out!"_ She apologized. I laughed and waved her off,

_"It's fine! Don't worry; the housekeeper will be by when we're out. She'll get it."_ Lucy nodded and went back to mixing with Lil and Will watching intently as she explained what she was mixing together. The gate rang and I walked over letting Paul in. He smiled,

_"Daddy!"_ Will and Lil shrieked from the kitchen. He must've been used to them running into his leg's when he arrived, but they stayed on the counter. Paul raised an eyebrow and walked into the kitchen. I heard him bust out laughing,

_"What happened 'ere?"_ He choked out. I walked in behind him surveying the room.

_"We're making pancakes!"_ Lily shouted. Holly toddled up to him. He looked down and noticed her covered in batter. He got down to his knees and gave her a kiss on the cheek,

_"Holly me girl. You're supposed to eat it not wear it!"_ He exclaimed poking her in the tummy. The baby laughed and garbled something incoherent. Paul and I waited until the pancakes were served and made our way out.

We went to Battersea Park, we spent the whole afternoon talking stopping for lunch then continuing. Eventually we had rented out a small rowboat. Paul paddled and finally we found nice place to stop. He pulled the paddle back in then leaned back, we both looked at each other for a while. He picked up from where we had last left off.

Paul's P.O.V.

_"What was Lily like when she was young...? Well I mean younger than she is now?"_ Rachael smiled in remembrance,

_"She was a lot of fun."_ Her eyes brightened,_ "She actually was a lot like you."_  
Paul nodded with a smile and she continued, _"She hated wearing clothes... Still does, she loved anyone she met, and was always talking. I swear the minute she started she never stopped."_ The pair kept quiet in their own bubble of thoughts, Paul decided that this was the moment to ask,

_"Rach, did she ever ask about me?"_ Rachael looked up at him with a glimmer of sadness in her dark eyes and nodded,

_"She asked about you a few times."_ He didn't know what to think,

_"What did you tell her?"_ She avoided his gaze and looked instead down at her bracelet.

_"When she was about 3 she started asking why other families had both a mom and a dad and she only had a mom. So I told her that you were busy. Which was true. I also told her that she'd probably meet you one day which was also true."_ Paul nodded and took over for her,

_"So then you went to work and ran into me... literally."_ He chuckled, _"And here we are now."_ Rachael looked up from her bracelet and shrugged.

_"I guess so."_ Paul turned his attention out over the water, it was tranquil and unscathed. He absentmindedly put his hand over the side of the small boat and touched the surface watching it ripple. They had finally caught up to present day and there were no more secrets… where to go from here?

Rachael's P.O.V.

We had it all out in the open, I sat back watching Paul. He was touching the water; he shifted his leg and the entire boat rocked. I grabbed onto the side holding tight, I didn't want to admit it but I really was scared of falling in. He looked up at me when my hand grasped the side. It took him a moment but he shifted his leg again watching my reaction as the boat rocked again slightly. My hold tightened on the side and immediately a mischievous grin played upon his lips,

_"Don't want to fall in, do you?"_ I shook my head with an embarrassed laugh; he sat up reaching out for me and pulled me over to his and onto his lap, _"Well then I think that you should sit right here, evenly distribute the weight, hm?"_ I busted out laughing.

"_Oh really? Evenly distribute the weight? From Beatle to Captain of the ship in a matter of seconds?"_ he chuckled and held on tight,

_"It's for yer own good, I'd hate to see you fall in."_ I nodded,

_"Then shouldn't I go back to my side so we don't tip?"_ He shook his head,

_"I don't think so, you should probably stay right here."_ He wrapped an arm around my middle while resting his chin on my shoulder and waited a moment,  
_"Look."_ He pointed a few feet ahead to a few ducks floating in the water, we watched them for a while, but a strange feeling came over me.

My stomach started to tighten; abruptly I didn't feel so great. I shifted a bit in his lap immensely uncomfortable. He turned his head looking at me,  
_"Problem?"_ He queried softly. I looked down at my stomach, as did he. Paul took a hand on it and rubbed it slightly, another squeeze seized my center. He noticed how uncomfortable I was, _"Has it been that bad lately?"_

I shook my head, _"No, not really actually."_ I answered. His hand ran over my small bump again. I was only about 8 or so weeks along. Another surge came alongside; I shifted again, letting out a breath of pain.

_"We should get going then."_ I slid back to my seat bench and waited until we were back and he had returned the boat. As soon as we got into the car another clench came. He pulled out of the lot and we began to make our way down the road. Not even 10 minutes into the drive, it became unbearable. I bit my lip refusing the urge to cry out; he glanced over at me with a worried expression,

_"Do we need to stop?"_ I nodded and Paul pulled over, _"Does it hurt as bad as before?"_

_"Yeah."_ I replied as a searing burst of excruciating soreness tore through my abdomen. He rolled down the window and scooted closer putting a cool hand on the back of my neck then pulled away slightly,

_"Rach, you're really warm."_ He took a hand placing it on my forehead then slid it down to my cheek before tucking back a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

_"Home."_ I said quietly. He moved back behind the wheel starting up the car and reaching over for my hand,

_"Tell me if you need to stop again, love."_ He drove faster than usual and we finally pulled up to my house and got through the gates.

It was now around 7 o'clock, the three kids were still with Lucy, she was going to take them out for dinner. I went into the kitchen and scurried for a glass of water. Presently I felt like complete trash. I was achy and uncomfortable all over, and my stomach felt like someone was kicking it repeatedly. I took a long sip leaning back against the sink. Paul found his way in and paused in the doorway. He looked me over apprehensively,

_"Why don't you go lay down for a tick?"_ I nodded and brushed past him on my way up the stairs. The pain was still incredible; and my stomach was still clamping in a frenzy. I made it to my bedroom and was weirdly out of breath while taking a seat on the bed. I let put a small whimper of discomfort, I has no idea what was going on, this was the worst I had ever felt and I was completely frightened. I crawled under the covers and flicked on the T.V. loud enough to drown out my own thoughts. Paul's knock came and he peeked his head in,

_"Nan's on the phone, she wants to know if Lucy can drop the kids over at her house to stay the night. Is that alright?"_ He questioned. I nodded and he went back down the hallway to finish the conversation.

Paul's P.O.V.

He got back to the phone.

_"Rachael says it'd be alright, Ms. Quin."_ He could hear the kindly old woman laugh on the other end,

_"You can call me Nan, lad!"_ Paul chuckled,

_"Will do."_ he could hear talking in the background,

_"Oop!"_ Nan said,_ "I think they've just gotten here, Lily wants to talk to you."_ A ruffled moment later Lily was on.

_"Hi, Daddy!"_ She squealed, Paul laughed,

_"Hi, Darling. Are you behaving?"_

_"Yes! Lucy brought us over to my Nan's we get to sleep over!"_ Paul could hear her smiling on the other end,

_"That's fantastic, love. Me and mummy will see you tomorrow, good?"_

_"Good."_ The five year old replied.

_"Kay, be good, I love you."_

_"Lorve you too."_ She ended the call, and Paul returned the phone to the cradle. He let out a shaky sigh; thankfully he had made it through that phone call. He was tremendously worried about Rachael, out of nowhere she had gotten sick at the park. He took a deep breath to calm himself he couldn't let Rachael see that he was nervous; he needed to be strong for her. He went back up to her bedroom and peered in. She was leaning back against the headboard with her eyes closed and her hands clutching her stomach,

_"Rach."_ He called gently. It took her a moment but she opened her eyes. They glistened full of tears. He took in a sharp breath as her lip quivered. Worry flooded over him, her rushed over to her side kneeling down,

_"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are the tears for, love?"_ She gulped and looked down at her stomach. He stood up and kicked off his shoes before crawling over her and sitting by her side.

_"Where does it hurt?"_ He asked hurriedly. She lifted up her shirt over the small bump and pointed to her lower left side. Paul put a hand on it then leaned over giving it a kiss.

_"Do you think we should see a doctor?"_ She shook her head wearily,

_"I'll be fine in a little while."_ She gasped as another shot of pain hit her and she bit her lip. He was at loss for words. He didn't want to argue with her, he figured they could wait a little while and if it got any worse they were definitely going in.

_"Just try to relax a bit. You'll be fine."_ He reassured.

He then pulled her frozen in pain body on top of himself wrapping his arms around her pulling her as close as humanly possible. He waited a few minutes until he felt her breathing slow, and she had fallen into sleep. He finally realized that this was the closest they had been since they had gone to Liverpool. He hesitantly reached for her blouse and pulled it up enough to expose up to her ribs. The bruise that had been there was nearly gone. Left in its place was a slightly discolored patch; it had healed up pretty well. He pulled her shirt back down tugging the comforter up over them then reached for the remote turning down the volume on The T.V. He felt Rachael tense up,

_"Paul?"_ She mumbled, still half asleep.

_"Yeah, love."_ With her eyes still closed she took a hand and put it on his chest making sure he was there. He took it holding on tight, and giving it a little kiss. She started mumbling something again,

_"Shhh, love."_ he cajoled, _"it's alright, I'm here."_ She nodded and relaxed again. He thought that she looked beautiful when she slept. Her eyes would flutter every so often; he could tell she wasn't feeling well though. He took a hand to her forehead, it was still really warm. He returned his hand back to her stomach and kept it there.

Eventually Rachael woke up,

_"How long was I asleep?"_ She mumbled, Paul looked over at the clock on her bedside table,

_"Bout an hour."_ She nodded and sat up rubbing her eyes. _"How do ya feel?"_  
She laughed weakly,

_"Bad."_ She said looking back at him. She flopped back into her pillow. Paul propped himself up on his elbow,

_"Better than earlier, no?"_ she nodded. _"But still not great, hm?"_ She shook her head.

_"Does yer whole middle still hurt?"_

_"Yep."_ She winced a little, he didn't know what to do anymore,

_"Do you think you need a doctor?"_ She shook her head quickly,

_"No. I'll be fine."_ He sighed, he knew she wouldn't go to the doctor even if her arm was cut off. He settled in, neither one of them knew what to do. They had finished their talks, and they were still in a strange place. He nudged her,

_"You'll be okay to go tomorrow right?"_ She nodded,

_"I'll be fine."_ They both looked back at the T.V. Rachael got up and walked over to the closet, Paul's eyes followed her across the room. He had to admit she was looking fantastic. Her hair had gotten a bit longer than usual, you couldn't even tell she was pregnant yet, just a small bump, nothing unusual. That was except for…

He heard a groan from her closet,

_"Are you alright?"_ He called.

_"Yeah, but my fucking tits are too big."_ Paul busted out laughing,

_"What?"_

_"I said my fucking tits are too big. I hate this part of pregnancy."_ Paul chuckled, that was the part that had changed about her, he wasn't trying to be perverted, but her breasts had grown slightly larger than usual… he wasn't complaining though.

_"What's wrong with that?"_ He called back,

_"I'm starting to look slutty in my clothes."_ Another fit of laughter overtook him. A shoe was whipped out at him from the closet,

_"It's not funny, McCartney!"_ He nodded,

_"It kind of is, Belter!"_ He heard her groan and a dress being unzipped,

_"What time is the thing tomorrow?"_

_"About 7, we can probably get out of there by 10, if we're lucky."_ He called back. She didn't say anything, it was quiet on her end,

_"Rach?"_ A moment later she came back out in her regular clothes, she looked a bit green about the gills; He patted the spot next to him on the bed. He knew had to go soon. That brief interlude of banter between them made him miss her desperately. Before he knew it, she was asleep. Paul felt her forehead, it was normal. He thanked God for a moment. Then sighed watching her breathe slowly. He shook her shoulder a bit,

_"I think I've gotta head out now."_ She nodded, pulling the covers up a little higher around herself. He got off the bed and left, walking as slowly as possible down the hall. He looked at the pictures that had been hung up, one in particular caught his eye. It had been taken in Greece. It was the day that they had gone to the beach, the day after he had made love to her. He was holding Lily and Will, Rachael was holding Holly. He stared at it for a while._ How could things have gone so wrong?_ He gently took the frame off of the wall studying the photograph intensely; he knew that Ritch had taken it with Rach's camera. He traced the outline of her face. Finally he couldn't take it anymore. He hung it back on the wall and went home.

He sat in the music room for a while. His tux had been delivered for tomorrow. He knew the kids were safe at Nan's. Rachael was asleep at her own home. He was the only one without a thing to do.

_"Martha!"_ He called. A moment later the sheepdog appeared in the doorway looking expectantly up at him. Paul patted his side and she dodged over sticking her head on his lap for a scratch behind the ears. He stood up and she followed him around the house. A few toys the kids had left were scattered here or there. Pictures they had drawn for him were hung on the fridge. A year ago he wouldn't have ever had imagined this. Now, this was the norm. Later, he fell into bed, with a fitful dream.

He was sitting in an empty room alone. No one was there. He called out a few times, no one answered. Eventually the doorbell rang, he got up following the noise. A man stood there,

_"Sir, I've some awful news."_ Paul didn't know what to think,

_"Your family… they've been in an accident. None of them made it."_ Horror washed over at him,

He suddenly woke up breathing heavily. He was back in his own room, in his own home. Martha was sleeping next to the bed. He quickly grabbed the phone and dialed Rachael's number. After about 3 rings she picked up,

_"Hello?"_ She mumbled. Paul closed his eyes and nearly cried as relief rushed through him.

_"Sorry, It's Paul. I was just checking in. Are you feeling better?"_ He heard her yawn.

_"Yes, I'm fine. Are you okay?"_ He thought about it, no he felt awful. He hated being alone and worrying like a lunatic,

_"I'm alright. I'll see you tonight. Yeah?"_

_"Yeah, see you."_ She hung up. Paul knew she was still half asleep.

_"I love you. I always have."_ He said to the empty line. He hung up.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: This one is long, but good. Another twist in the story. Reviews please?**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

Lily sat on my bathroom counter facing me. She was dressed in a princess costume and lightly dapping the brush on my face,

_"See mummy, I did your makeup!"_ I nodded at her non-existent makeup job.

_"I think you missed a spot."_ I said pointing at my cheek.

_"Oh!"_ She stated running the brush over it again. William walked in wearing his cowboy costume, taking a pretend shot at Lily with his plastic gun, **"Pew, Pew!"** He yelled. Lily shot him a look,

_"No guns in the bathroom!"_ She shrieked; I covered my ears. William rolled his eyes,

_"Mum, Holly keeps chewing on my guns, I tried to shoot her but she won't drop them."_ I glanced back behind my shoulder to see Holly dribbling all over Will's pistol's.

_"Holly."_ I called, she looked up at me with her adorable grin. I swear she could get away with murder.

_"Will, go get your guns."_ He ran back out and collected them. The baby didn't fuss at all she just crawled over to the next thing that caught her attention. I turned back to Lily who was holding my cheek and going on with the pretend makeup,

_"Mummy why are you dressed up all pretty?"_ I closed my eyes as she ran the brush over them,

_"Daddy and I have to go to a party, Lucy's coming over. Remember?"_ She grinned at the mention of Lucy and nodded. I finally took the brush from her and started in on real makeup, Paul would be here soon. I already had my dress on and my hair done. She watched carefully as I did the foundation, then the powder. We could hear the gate rang.

_"I'll get it."_ Will offered,

_"Okay, tell me who it is before you let them in!"_ I heard the boys footsteps disappear down the hallway.

_"Mummy its dad, can I let him in?"_ He Hollered.

_"Yes."_ Excited chatter soon followed.

_"Hey!"_ He said. Paul came in the bedroom holding Holly's arms as she walked with Will hanging off of his back.

_"Look how pretty mummy looks!"_ He exclaimed to the kids. I smiled lightly still concentrating on the eyeliner I was about to apply. Lily took my hand,

_"Lemme try."_ She said. I looked it over apprehensively handing her the liquid tool, what was the worst that could happen? If she messed up I could just start over. She took her petite little hand and put it on my nose to steady my face.

_"Okay, just a little."_ I instructed. She blinked one eye in concentration and stuck her tongue out. I closed my eyes and felt the little applicator swipe across my left lid. I waited a minute for it to dry then opened, surprised at the outcome. The five year old had done it spot on.

_"I did it!"_ She giggled. Paul peeked his head in, and Lily waved her arm for him to come over.

_"Look daddy I dided it!"_ He smiled and came over to inspect the job,

_"That's smashing, love."_ Lillian handed him the makeup,

_"You try!"_ Paul chuckled and looked down at it, he dipped it in the tube then took my shoulders so I was facing him,

_"Don't move."_ He instructed. I closed my eyes trying to stifle a laugh. I felt the miniscule brush swipe across my right lid. I waited a moment then opened, it matched the other one. Paul chuckled,

_"Don't tell the guys I do makeup. They're already on me about being too soft."_ I laughed and went back to the job. Lily handed me tools as I needed them. I finally put on just a touch of lip gloss.  
_"Kiss me, I put too much on!"_ I said to the little girl, she gave me a peck. I finished up and put everything away, then helped her jump off the counter.

_"Lucy's coming soon guys, go get up into bed!"_ I said addressing the older kids. Will and Lily dragged Paul along down the hallway,

_"Read us a story!"_ He complied leaving Holly in my room. She was still wobbling around, I had to admit she was starting to get the hang of walking on her own. I started in on my other foot, Paul soon came back in.

_"Little Red Riding Hood."_ He stated solemnly. I laughed working a clasp on my bracelet,

_"My, my Miss Belter. What big tits you have!"_ He said putting on a falsetto voice mocking the story. I whipped a hairbrush at him,

_"You're swine."_ He chuckled and picked up Holly swinging around with her.

_"Am I swine, Holly?"_ He asked the baby. She had no idea what he was talking about but grinned up at him anyways. He started having a discussion with her, I zoned out and doing last minute things.

_"Hello!"_ Lucy greeted peeking her head into the room, I hadn't even noticed that Paul had let her in, I smiled.

_"Hi!"_ She looked me up and down,

_"You look great!"_ I smiled, she was such a sweet girl. Paul tossed the hairbrush I had whipped at him earlier back to my lap,

_"Come 'ead we have to go."_ He gave Holly a kiss on the cheek and handed her off to Lucy. Then came over to the closet I was standing in holding out a hand for me.

_"My lady."_ He said mockingly. I pushed past him laughing and got out myself,

_"You're still swine."_ He chuckled as we left.

When we arrived we were immediately swarmed by photographers. We made it through and finally met up with Ritch and Maureen inside. She was wearing the dress I had let her borrow,

_"You look stunning!"_ I gushed, she pulled me off to the side while the men started talking.

_"You too, I'm so glad you came! I hate coming to these things, everyone here is always so stuffy."_ We found a small table to ourselves.

_"So Miss Rachael, where in the world have you been?"_ I smiled,

_"Busy. Definitely busy."_ Ritch obviously hadn't told her what I had confided in him at the studio.

_"That's just fine!"_ She got quiet for a moment, _"Have you met Yoko?"_ I nodded,

_"She's sweet, have you?"_ Mo shook her head quickly,

_"Ritch told me she was awful."_ I raised an eyebrow,

_"She was fine when I met her. What'd he say?"_ Mo moved in closer,

_"Do you know about the whole Cynthia thing?"_ I shrugged, I knew vaguely that she was John's wife and that they were going for a divorce. _"Well John up and left Cyn for the Jap tart!"_ I busted out laughing,

_"Maureen Starkey, that's an awful thing to say!"_ She shrugged giggling,

_"It's the truth though!"_

_"What did Ritch tell you about her?"_ She looked around making sure no one else could hear us.

_"Not much, it just bugs me. Cyn was so sweet, and treated him like gold. It's just sad to watch, you know?"_ I nodded. We were quiet for a moment waiting for a group to pass us.

_"How are you and Paul?"_ I looked away, finally deciding to confide the same as I had told Ritch.

_"I don't know. Remember how I had left Greece?"_ She nodded, _"It wasn't because I was ill… we had gotten into an argument… and didn't speak for a month."_ Her eyes widened,

_"You're serious?"_

_"Dead. The only reason we started talking was because I got sick, and he took me to get checked out."_ Sudden realization crossed her face, the same it had crossed Ritchie's.

_"So that night I came over to keep an ear out for the kids… you went to the hospital?"_ I nodded, _"Are you alright?" _

_"Yeah, I'm fine now."_ She sighed,

_"What's been going on between you two now?"_ We looked over the crowd. Paul and Ritch were still in a group of people talking,

_"Well, we got everything out on the table, and I honestly don't know now."_ She reached for my hand giving it a squeeze.

_"Things happen for a reason."_ I smiled at the reassurance. She had said the same thing at the hotel.

_"Mo you have to promise not to tell anyone though!"_ She nodded so hard I thought her head was going to roll off of her shoulders. She held out her little finger and I laughed locking pinkies with her, feeling like a kid.

_"Having fun girls?"_ Ritch asked. We both jumped in surprise, we hadn't even known they were standing there. He and Paul busted out laughing,

_"You girls reacted the same way when we found you sloshed out of yer 'eads at the beach!"_ Paul exclaimed. Mo and I giggled holding onto each other for support.

_"Up Miss!"_ Paul said pulling me up into standing position and slinking an arm around my waist,

_"We have to go dance!"_ Ritch let out a wolf whistle and I busted out laughing as Paul managed to drag me to the dance floor.

Paul's P.O.V.

He tugged her over to the dance floor and pulled her arms until they were wrapped around his neck. Then slid his around her tiny waist. He had to admit, the short little black dress she was sporting showed off her figure amazingly.

_"What were you and Mo talking about?"_ He asked with a smile.

_"We were planning our escape."_ He chuckled. Mo and Ritch made their way over next to them Mo leaned away from Ritch whispering something into her ear. They pair of women giggled and she leaned back. He felt a few strands of her soft dark brown hair fall between his fingers. He caught a few and toyed with them. Mo leaned over again and the two were thrown into another fit of giggles. Her ample bosom shook slightly as she laughed, Paul instantly felt his pants get a bit tighter. He managed to keep control of himself as she leaned back and continued moving with him,

_"What in the world is so funny?"_ He whispered, she leaned closer, he could smell the light scent of perfume she was wearing. It drove him mad,

_"Look over there."_ She whispered while nodding towards a man across the room. Sure enough an old geezer who was obviously drunk was dancing with himself. He chuckled and pulled her just a bit closer. Whether she knew it or not, she rubbed her leg slightly between his for a second, he thought he might explode.

The music then jumped to a fast number.

_"Come on Rach!"_ Mo said pulling her away from Paul. The two women scurried off to join a group of females that obviously recognized Maureen. Paul let out a breath, did she even know how much of tease she was?

_"Ciggie?"_ Ritch offered leading him over to the balcony. Paul took one thankful for the distraction and the two men went outside.

He and Ritch had a drink or two before going back in, he spotted Rachael across the room next to Maureen chatting up another woman. Maureen said something, the woman busted out laughing, and Rachael laughed a little. He could tell something was off. She shifted to her side and discreetly placed a hand on her stomach. He downed the remainder of his glass and went over slinking an arm around her waist. She looked up at him surprised by his arrival,

_"Hi."_ He smiled, a bit more relaxed, thanks to his liquid courage.

_"Hi."_ She said. She studied him for a moment Paul leaned in,

_"Excuse us for a moment, ladies."_He winked. Rachael looked over to Mo and shrugged, and let him lead her away to a private space on a free wall.

_"Are you alright?"_ He asked. She nodded,

_"I'm fine."_ He looked around,

_"Let's take a little walk."_ He pulled her a little tighter to his side and making off to an exit. There was a small trail in a back garden. The cool air hit them as they left. He led her around for a while not really saying much.

_"Are you having a good time?"_ She smiled,

_"Yeah."_ He spotted a bench pulling her over to it. He sat down and pulled her next to him so their hips were pressed together then slunk an arm around her back. They looked up at the sky for a while, enjoying the quiet. They could still hear the benefit going on, not 20 feet away. Glasses clinking, people shouting and the murmur of music. He looked her over still admiring her beauty. Her thick dark lashes, and the small smile she had on bewitched him. He couldn't take it any longer, he leaned in giving her a small peck on the cheek,

_"You're driving me crazy, you know?"_ She looked over raising an eyebrow.

_"Am I?"_ He nodded toying again with her hair. At last they heard a definite switch in the movement of the room,

_"Let's go."_ She said standing up, _"They're starting the dinner."_ He sighed and led her back to the room. She took a seat next to Mo and Paul took one across the table next to Ritch. The two women of course flew into their mindless chatter. He glanced over at Ritch who was being berated into conversation with some bloke next to him. He gave Paul a small **_'Shoot me'_** signal before turning over to the man.

Eventually dinner was served. Paul ate quietly, studying Rachael carefully. She wasn't touching her food, just listening to Maureen. She would push a piece to one side and mash it. An outsider would look at her plate and think she had eaten. Paul knew otherwise. He carefully extended his foot under the table giving her leg a light nudge. After a moment she looked up at him, he raised an eyebrow and looked down at her plate. She gave him nothing, and turned back to her conversation. He took a sip of his scotch and nudged Ritchie with his elbow,

_"Yeah?"_ He whispered,

_"What're Rachael and Maureen talking about?"_ Paul questioned quietly. Ritch shrugged,

_"Silly bird things I suppose. Probably discussing ways t' put us in the mad house."_ Paul chuckled. Each of the men watched their date. Eventually Maureen caught on that the men were trying to listen in and looked around the table making sure no one was paying attention before sticking out her tongue at them. Rachael giggled and covered her mouth. Paul saw amusement in her eyes,

_"Mo, don't do that!"_ Paul said loud enough to embarrass her and make a few people turn their heads. Maureen ignored him and continued chatting with Rachael. She then looked around to make sure the people had lost interest and flipped him off. Paul chuckled and nudged Ringo. He took one look at what his wife was doing and hid his face in his hands trying to control the laughter and stifle a groan. He finally repressed it and looked up at Mo who gave him an innocent face. He chuckled and took a swig of his drink.

_"She's the reason 'm gettin' grey hairs already."_ Ritch chuckled. Paul took another bite and laughed, he could imagine a tired old Ringo carting a rambunctious Maureen around town.

Dinner was finally over, and there was a small break before dessert. He pulled Rachael away from Maureen and returned to the dance floor. He set her back in their previous dancing position and leaned over,

_"Why didn't you eat?"_ He whispered, she avoided his eyes instead looking at the couples around them.

_"I did."_ She lied. He could tell. Whenever she lied she scrunched her nose a tad a blinked. They continued moving together.

_"Rach."_ He said softly she was still avoiding his eyes. He took one hand away from the small of her back and lifted her chin so he was looking him in the eye. _"You feelin' alright?"_ She nodded. He noticed the nose scrunch and a few blinks.

The song finished and he led her over to a private area.

_"The truth."_ He demanded. She crossed her arms and searched past him probably looking for Maureen,

_"Please?"_ He added quietly. She finally looked up and sighed,

_"I'm fine. Just leave it, please."_ Paul pulled her into a hug, discreetly placing a hand on her stomach,

_"Are you sick again?"_ She shook her head, he felt her stomach tighten and relax a few times. She pulled away, Maureen calling her back. He sighed and let her go.

Eventually they adjourned back to the table. Paul traded places with some ditz who was next to Rachael. She happily obliged after he winked at her. He took a seat looking over at Ringo who obviously didn't want to sit by himself. Ritch got up and flirted with the girl sitting next to Maureen who moved when asked politely. He put a hand on Rachael's thigh, she looked back at him noticing him for the first time in his new seat. She looked him up and down then across the table to the ditz who gave her a smile and a wave, she returned it then shot him a look. He shrugged and picked at the dessert. Then nudged her,

_"Eat something."_ He murmured. She glanced over at him and continued pushing it around her plate while listening to some bloke across the table. Paul moved his hand up touching her stomach, she wiggled a little but he kept it there. He knew something was wrong. Eventually Rachael whispered something to Mo and they got up,

_"Be back in a sec."_ Mo informed the boys, then turned on her heel and entwined arm with Rachael's. Paul glanced down at his watch, it was 8:30. Only an hour and a half left to endure. Ritch balled up a piece of his napkin and flicked it at him to get his attention, he looked up.

**_'What's wrong?'_ **He mouthed. Paul shook his head and made a feeble attempt to rejoin reality. _What was wrong?_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I felt like I had been shot, ran over, then trampled over by a stampede of elephants. Mo took me over to the bathroom. Once inside she checked under the stalls making sure no one else was there, then glanced over at me,

_"What's the matter?"_ I shook my head,

_"I… I just needed a minute."_ She nodded and began fixing her hair. I got productive and fixed my makeup as another twist came. This time I was nearly sure I was going to lose it and get sick everywhere. But I held it in. After a few minutes she looked back over at me,

_"Ready?"_ We interlocked arms again before returning to the table. I sat down returning my napkin to my lap. Paul leaned over,

_"Care to explain?"_ I looked over at him,

_"I'm fine. Quit worrying."_ I put on a fake smile and listened back into the table discussion. Something I had no clue about, Politics. Another rap of pain came and I shifted slightly feeling the blood rush to my face. I took a sip of water, quickly noticing how bad my hand was shaking. I put down the glass and no one had noticed, or so I thought. Paul grabbed my hand as I put it back down to my side. Thankfully dessert ended and People began meandering off into different groups.

_"We're going."_ Paul stated simply. I didn't want to leave, I wanted to hang out with Maureen. It was the first time I had seen her in what felt like ages. I tilted my head,

_"Why?"_ He sighed and ran a thumb over my hand.

_"I saw you with the glass of water. You couldn't even manage that. Something is obviously wrong."_ I let out a shaky breath. I didn't want to go,

_"What time is it?"_ I asked quietly.

_"8:45"_ I glanced around the room. _"Rach, no one is going to notice if we duck out for a bit. Here, why don't we go for a little walk?"_ I let him lead me out to the back garden again to the bench. We sat there for a while, the pain in my stomach staying neutral.

_"Where does it hurt?"_ he said. Everywhere. I knew he was only trying to help, but I was just achy.

_"Really, I'm fine."_ I tried reassuring him. He shook his head.

_"Fine stand up."_ I sighed and stood before him. _"Okay, hold out yer hand."_ I reluctantly did so, It was shaking horribly no matter how hard I willed it to stop. He grimaced and pulled me onto his lap,

_"Told you."_ He said tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. I felt a tear in my eye but I hurriedly blinked it back. I wanted out. I wanted to run away. From everything. The pain. This party. I couldn't even think straight. I felt like passing out.

Another cramp seized me middle, this was the worst one I had ever experienced. I saw little black dots cloud my vision, sort of like the ones you get when you stand up too quickly or hold your breath for too long. I coughed trying to cover up the cry of pain. Paul quickly rubbed my back,

_"Easy, there."_ He murmured I was too numb to argue. After the coughing fit he pulled my head against his chest,

_"Take yer time."_ He ordered softly, _"We're alone."_ I let out a breath and stayed there unmoved, after a few minutes the pain began to ebb away. I shifted a little to test it out, I felt pretty much back to normal. I scooted off of his lap, and he raised an eyebrow,

_"Are we feeling better?"_ I nodded. He smiled.

_"Look."_ He pointed farther down the trail; I could make out a faint glimmer of water. He took a strand of my hair and twisted around his index finger,

_"We could go for a swim."_ He chuckled. I swatted at his gut,

_"Not on your life."_

Paul's P.O.V.

He was immensely glad whatever pain she was in was over. He hated seeing her like that, she wouldn't talk and would tell him she was fine, he knew better.

_"Rachael!"_ He instantly recognized Maureen's voice from the balcony over head.

_"Maureen!"_ She called back. They looked over and saw Maureen peek over the ledge,

_"Come back inside! It's cold out!"_ He watched Rachael giggle and shoot him a look,

_"Paul's trapped me out here, Mo. Help."_

_"Give me a minute! Ritch keeps telling me quiet down!"_ They both watched Maureen's head go back over and a small argument between Ritch and herself could be heard.

_"Ritch says I can't come down there 'cause I'm his date and I've spent more time with you than with him!"_ He watched Rachael burst out laughing, it was the prettiest thing he had ever heard.

_"It's okay Maureen. We can escape later!"_

_"Okay Rachael! Tell Paul I say Hi!"_ Rachael nudged him.

_"Take her back inside, Ritch!"_ He called. They heard both Ritch and Maureen laughing and then the distinct shut of doors, they must've gone back in. He chuckled,

_"I can't bring you back in there now!"_ She raised an eyebrow and smiled,

_"And why not?"_ He pulled her closer,

_"Because, you're my date. Maureen has Ritch."_ He informed her.

_"Maureen's much cuter than you are."_ She stated with a smirk. He grabbed the space above his heart in mock horror,

_"Rach, stop breaking my heart!"_ She snickered. He took her hand and kissed it. She blushed a deep red, his heart nearly stopped. _"I think you're the cutest person here."_ He whispered. She rolled her eyes and grinned.

_"You don't think it, you know it."_ He chuckled and pulled her back onto his lap.

_"Come home with me tonight."_ She scrunched her eyebrows together and let out a howl of laughter,

_"No. I'm not sleeping with you, that's a stupid way to get me into bed."_ He shook his head,

_"I promise no funny business."_ She shook her head with the same smile and he leaned in closer,

_"Can I tell you a secret?"_ He said looking her straight in those adorable dark eyes, she nodded,

_"I haven't brought a girl home in months. The gatebirds think I'm starting to lose it. They've only seen me walking in and out with little kids. They must think I'm running a day care center."_ She snorted then quickly brought a hand to her face as her cheeks blushed. She finally repressed the laughter.

_"Nope, sorry. If anything I'll go home with Maureen."_ He rolled his head back against the bridge and looked up at the sky,

_"I've got to ask Mo her secret. You're driving me crazy."_ He said in exasperation. She got off of his lap and stood up,

_"Let's go back in before you lose your mind."_ He stood up slinking an arm back around her waist and led her back to the room. They surpassed the bathroom,

_"Gimme a minute."_ He nodded and let her go waiting patiently against the wall. He couldn't believe how well things were going. If he could just find a way to make this last.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I walked into the bathroom needing to fix my hair. My mind replayed the events back out in the garden. I had to admit, he was being patient. I glanced over myself in the mirror slightly adjusting my dress and necklace. The stall door behind me opened and a woman came out. I didn't give it a second thought, but suddenly it hit me. I turned my attention rapidly back to her, my neck nearly snapping off.

_**"Kelley?"**_ She looked up and instantly her eyes widened.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: Hey guys, thanks for the reviews. Alright, so in response to the comment from Andiee Lomlay, I really don't think you get the way I'm writing the story. There is such a thing as a third person's P.O.V. In the story I tell Rachael's part from a First Person Point Of View using the words 'I, me, mine, my'. On the other hand, I tell Paul, Lillian, etc. from a Third Person's P.O.V. using personal pronouns such as 'He, they, we, it, her, etc' from the third person's P.O.V. you can tell what the character is thinking, feeling, or doing using those pronouns and occasionally their names. Alright, I know that is a little confusing but I really hope you do get the point. Rachael's part is from where she stands using first person. Everyone else has their P.O.V. but it is told in a third persons point of view. **

**Okay, wow that was really long, but anyway enjoy the story. Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

Rachael's P.O.V.

Kelley and I stood there staring at each other for a moment. She was a taller slightly more robust, blonde, version of me with ice blue eyes.

_"What're you doing here?"_ I asked quietly. She shifted uncomfortably to another heeled foot and clasped her hands together.

_"You can have Holly."_ She stated. My mind went blank, what the hell just happened?

_"What?"_ I asked not believing what I had just heard.

_"You heard me."_ She said calmly. I felt my mouth drop open. I took a second then pulled back my composure.

_"Where have you been?"_ I stuttered, "No phone call, no letter, nothing." She shrugged her shoulders and looked down at the delicate silver watch that slightly dangled from her wrist. I recognized it immediately. I was wearing the corresponding bracelet. Our father had given them to us before he went on a business trip… the one he hadn't come back from.

_"I've been around. Daniel and I have decided a child is too much of a distraction. She's yours."_ My mind instantly flashed back through the memories of Holly. When Kelley had informed me that she was pregnant, she was over the moon. I remembered the first time earlier this year seeing the baby. How in the world could you not want your own child?

_"What?"_ She simply shrugged. Staring back at me. Emotionless.

_"I think it's time I got out of here. Oh, by the way. I've seen you in the paper's lately. The kids look great."_ Kelley tucked her hair back behind her ear and walked over to me reaching out an arm for a hug. I was bewildered but accepted it. She stood before me and gave a me a smile running a hand through my hair,

_"You look just like mom, Rach."_ She then sighed and looked down back at her watch, _"I guess I'll be going then."_ I stared right back at her,

_"Whe- when will I see you again? Holl- you're not even going to see Holly?"_ I stammered. She touched the tip of my nose, the same smile playing on her lips,

_"I'll always be in your heart. Take good care of my baby for me. You're her mom now. Love you."_ She gave me a kiss on the cheek and spun around out the bathroom door. I stood there like an idiot trying to comprehend what had just happened. It took me nearly 5 minutes to even blink again. It finally hit me, Holly had been mine all along. Happiness shot right through to my core. She was finally mine.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was waiting against the wall patiently for Rachael to finish. He heard a din of voices begin to talk in the bathroom and sighed, she had probably found someone to talk to, god only knew how long she would be in there. A smile then spread across his lips, she was exasperating. Not 10 minutes later a woman came out the door. It took him by surprise. She looked exactly like Rachael but in a blonde, slightly larger form. His mouth dropped open when she turned to him. She gave him a warm smile,

_"Are you Paul?"_ She asked. She sounded just like Rachael.

_"Erm yeah?"_ He didn't know what to think. She giggled, the same as Rachael had.

"_I'm Kelley Belter, Rachael's older sister. Thanks for taking such good care of her."_ His mouth dropped open, and the blonde giggled again,

_"I know you've been with her, and it means a lot to me that you two have been taking care of Holly. But I have to go."_ She reached out a hand, he took it shaking it lightly, the same delicate china doll hands as Rachael.

_"Bye, now!"_ She let go and turned on her heels swaying her way out the back door. He let out the breath he had unknowingly been holding in, what the hell had just happened? Not even a minute later Rachael came out staring at him with raised eyebrows. He didn't even know where to begin.

_"That was Kelley?"_ He asked quietly searching her eyes. It took her a minute but a smile tugged the corners of her mouth,

_"Holly's mine now."_ She stated and started laughing. His heart instantly felt lighter, he had expected a dramatic scene, nothing of that kind took place, just pure joy.

_"That's fantastic, love!"_ He exclaimed proudly. He reached around and pulled her into a hug,_ "That's just great."_ He said. She nodded and for the first time hugged him back.

_"Come on, I've gotta tell Mo!"_ She said grabbing his hand, he let out a groan, she and Mo had to tell each other everything. Paul let himself be led back into a party room, he watched as she spotted Maureen giving her a wave. Maureen instantly perked up and rushed over from Ringo's side. The two women walked off somewhere discussing what had just happened in excited whispers. He chuckled, the night was going great, and to think: _what if she hadn't come?_

He was pulled back into some conversation with a group of probably the most boring people that had ever walked the planet. He was looking around the room, searching when he spotted her. She was with Mo and the two women were standing in another group, he chuckled. Both of them looked bored out of their minds. He waited a moment until she glanced towards his direction,

**'Come 'ere.'** He mouthed with a little wave. Rachael nudged Maureen and the two women slowly eased their way out from the circle. Then bolted over. Paul excused himself from the conversation, and turned around to greet them. Both were standing there with a glazed over expression when Ritch came up,

"_Shoot me."_ Maureen stated simply. Rachael giggled, and nudged her side.

_"She's right, this blows."_ Ritch agreed while grabbing another drink from a passing waiter. Paul glanced down at his watch, **'9:15'** time couldn't be moving any slower.

_"Whaddya say we get outta here, hit a club or somethin'?"_ He asked the group, both Mo and Rachael nodded quickly, and Ritch raised his glass. The group began walking towards the entrance, the host of the benefit nearly ran over when she spotted them,

"_Hello, lovely evening, isn't it?"_ The women asked. Each of them nodded and put on fake smiles, except for Ritch, he kept his stare blank taking another gulp from his cup. _"Where are you four headed off to?"_ Maureen elbowed Paul in the stomach,

_"Oof."_ He reacted then pinched the back of her arm before answering,

_"Erm, it's a bit late, kids you know?"_ The woman nodded while putting a hand on her heart,

_"Oh how sweet, I remember-"_ She then went off into some story about her children.

_"But if you four have to go, we'll be seeing you then?"_ Each nodded bidding farewells before scooting out the door and nearly running to coat check. Paul got Rachael's coat and threw it to her, Ritch was trying to help Maureen into hers when another benefactor spotted them, then waltzed over. Paul stifled a groan.

_"Hello all!"_ They all greeted him appropriately,

_"Heading out, I see?"_ Paul nearly punched Ritch in the back, he didn't want to deal with this one,

_"Erm, yeah. You know, kids and stuff."_ Ritch lamely made the same excuse. The man jumped into a story about his own children, Paul looked over at Rachael, she shot him the **'you have to be kidding me?'** look and giggled before turning back to the storyteller. After the man had left he quickly threw on his coat and helped Rach with hers,

_"Wait, bathroom break!"_ Maureen called grabbing Rachael by the hand. Both of the men groaned and just as the women had made it into the bathroom another guest came with a huge smile,

_"Lovely evening, am I right?"_ He mused. Paul looked up at the ceiling, if there was a God this was penance for everything he had done wrong in his life.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Mo scurried into a stall and I spotted a phone near a lounge spot. I quickly rang home,

"_Hello?"_ It was Lucy,

_"Hey Luce, it's Rachael, everything going okay?"_

_"Yes! Everything's going great. Will and Lily have been asleep since you left, Holly and I are having a movie night!"_ I breathed a sigh of relief, everything was going smoothly.

_"Fantastic, do you need us to come home?"_ I could hear Holly in the background giggling,

_"No! Take your time, I've already set my stuff up in the guest room, we're doing great!"_ I smiled into the receiver,

_"Okay, thanks so much, Luce!"_

_"No problem, see you later!"_ I hung up as Mo had finished washing her hands. We walked over to the door and peeked our heads out, Ritch and Paul were being coerced into talking to another charity doer. We both brought ourselves back into the bathroom fighting off laughter, we'd let the boys deal with this one. Mo and I waited a few minutes before going back out, both men were tapping their feet impatiently,

_"Took ye bloody long enough!"_ Ritch exclaimed dragging Mo out the door. Paul wrapped an arm around my waist and the 4 of us set off. The valet got our cars,

_"Speakeasy?"_ Paul called to Ritch who was entering his car, a thumbs up was his response. We settled in and let Ritch lead us to the club.

_"That was fookin' awful."_ Paul chuckled turning out of the lot,

_"Why did you drag me there?"_ I whined, he chuckled and continued driving. Eventually we made it to the club. When we entered the place was packed. Mo and I let the boys drag us back to their usual spot, we were surprised to find George there with Pattie on his lap,

_"Hullo!"_ He called and waved us over. Immediately two lounge chairs were abandoned, both Paul and Ritch pulled Mo and I onto their laps and began telling George their tales of misery about the event. I immediately recognized Pattie,

_"Rachael?!"_ She squealed, I giggled and leaned over off of Paul's lap for a hug,

_"Hey Pattie!"_ Pattie was a model, she had made her way into the scene as I was about to make my exit. We had met up in New York, to do a shoot. Surprisingly, it was the week before I went to London and met Paul. Small world, huh?

Pattie and I told Maureen the story of how we had met,

_"You're serious?"_ She asked looking between us,

_"Yep! Rachael was the only one who would talk to me at that first shoot!"_ I giggled remembering. All the other models had a serious dislike to Pattie, I had no idea why though, she was so friendly and sociable. The three of us continued talking. A waiter came around with drinks, Mo handed Pattie and I glasses, and turned back. Paul shifted a little and called the waiter back over. He discreetly handed the man my glass taking another one and took a sip of the trade off,

_"Water."_ He whispered handing it to me. I nodded in thanks, turning back to the conversation. Thankfully no one had noticed, we hadn't told any of them I was pregnant.

Paul's P.O.V.

Perfect. Everything was Perfect. Rachael was happy sitting on his lap talking to the other girls. He, George, and Ringo were listening to George's friend Alex tell them about his own recording studio. He bounced Rachael slightly, admiring her figure from his position, he placed a finger on her thigh and gently traced a newfound scar. It was about a 3 inch pockmark running diagonal from the back of her leg nearly to the front. It had to be old; it was slightly puckered, and faded. He then reached around and absentmindedly grabbed her hand playing with her little silver bracelet. George leaned over handing him a cig, whilst lighting it.

_"Ta."_ He thanked taking a drag, he traded out his drink for a new one.

_"Album 's done tomorrow."_ Paul heard George inform his friend. He then turned back to himself and Ritch,

_"What're you blokes doin' for break?"_ Ritch shrugged,

_"Probably take Mo 'nd the boys on holiday, dunno yet."_ The men then looked over at Paul he shrugged himself,

_"No idea. Hangin' out with the kids er whatever."_ Immediately a smile plastered across Geo's face. Paul knew he was fond of William. Both of them shared an unquenchable love for automobiles; something Paul knew only a little about. Ritch went on telling a story, and Paul thought it over some. _What was he going to do over the break?_ They didn't have to be back in the studio until nearly January. It was the last day of November right this very moment. Right now he was just living in the moment. He knew that he definitely wanted to bring the kids up to Liverpool for Christmas with the family. Another thought struck him, _Rachael probably wanted to do the same thing and bring the kids back to Chicago._ He gently nudged her and she turned around flashing him a smile,

_"Rach."_ He questioned quietly, _"What're the kids doing for Christmas?"_ She tilted her head to the side, she must've been taken aback by the question seemingly coming from out of the blue.

_"I don't know, why?"_ he had a firm hold on her waist,

_"Well I was wondering if I could bring you all up to the 'Pool for the holiday."_ She shrugged,

_"Yeah you can have them. I'm taking them to Chicago in January for our other Christmas."_ He raised an eyebrow,

_"Other Christmas?"_

_"Orthodox Christmas."_ Relief flooded over him, it worked out perfectly, he went over what she had just said,** 'you can have them'**. He wanted her to come with too. She was already turned around talking to Pattie, he bounced her again to get her attention. She finished off and turned around,

_"I want you to come too."_ He said, more like demanded. Rachael shrugged her shoulders,

_"We'll talk about it later."_ Paul let out a sigh as she turned back around, maybe she was right. A smoke filled club wasn't really the best place to talk about Christmas. He put on a smile anyway, everything was going great.

The night had progressed, it was pushing eleven. Rachael was now slightly leaning against him, whilst they talked to the other couples. Paul put down his drink and pulled her back farther into his lap and wrapped his arms around her, keeping her comfortable. She looked down her nose at him with a small smile.

The alcohol he had was working its magic and he was more than relaxed. As time progressed, one of his adventurous hands made its way down the small scoop of her back, to which she allowed. He began inching it lower, without even looking at him Rachael reached around and returned it to the middle of her back. It became like a little game. Every time she was talking to someone he would slowly advance down trying to reach its destination, and each time she would reach around without even pausing in converse to pick it up and replace it back to its original home. Paul finally began walking his fingers up her back to tickle her. He noticed she wiggled a little and desperately tried to pinch his middle to make him stop, without trying to make a show of it. He grabbed the pinching fingers and brought them to his lips giving them a kiss. She shot him an amused look, and he winked at her with a cocky smirk.

_"Knock it off."_ Rachael hissed trying not to giggle, his free hand pinched her other side and she nearly jumped, _"Paul, I'm not even kidding you."_ She let out a small laugh.

_"Give us a kiss."_ He murmured putting on his infamous pout. She shook her head and giggled,

_"No, I don't like you."_ He chuckled,

_"Please?"_ She shook her head again, laughing, and started talking again to Maureen.

_"Club Noreik?"_ He heard Maureen ask Ritch and Rachael, Rachael turned around and looked at him waiting for an answer.

_"Sure."_ He consented. She got up from his lap, Paul stood up as well finishing the last of his drink. They bid farewell to the others and the 4 of them made their way out.

Club Noreik was loud. The music was blasting, and more than once he nearly lost sight of Rachael and Maureen who scurried away to find a seat. He'd much rather be home with the kids he thought, and chuckled to himself, when had he become such a boring old man?

He finally spotted the women, they were seated on a rather long couch talking to some bloke who was the epitome of sleaze. His slick greased back hair and wiry mustache only made him look like a complete idiot. Paul studied the group for a while observing their interactions, more than once the bloke had leaned forward enough to try to sneak a peek down Rachael's dress. He scoffed, he knew that trick, he had done it before. Paul quickly stepped in walking over confidently to the women,

_"'Ello girls."_ He greeted giving the man a smirk. Mo and Rach immediately parted making room for him, he slunk an arm around Rachael's back still intently focused on the man,

"_Paul McCartney."_ He said reaching over past Rachael to shake his hand. The sleaze ball's demeanor quickly changed and he looked defeated. He mumbled some name that Paul couldn't quite make out before getting up and leaving obviously pissed that he couldn't make a move on the girls. He then focused back on Rachael,

_"Having fun?"_ He asked. She looked him over and nodded before turning to the woman beside her that she was talking to previously. Rachael shifted slightly towards him, he thought nothing of it. Ritch was across from them going on about something ridiculous. Rachael shifted even closer, he still didn't notice, that was until he felt her back go rigid. He looked over to her, she was decidedly pale, while still in discussion with the woman next to her. _Oh god_, he thought, _she's sick again._

_"Rachael."_ He whispered, she broke the conversation off and looked back at him, her eyes were wide and looked exceptionally scared. _"Let's get on home, yeah?"_ For once she didn't put up an argument and let herself be led out of the building. He slid an arm around her waist quietly supporting her until they were alone at last inside his car.

_"Where?"_ He asked scanning her up and down, she shook her head and coughed.

_"I'm fine."_ Paul sighed, and started up the car driving just a little faster than usual, she didn't look so good.


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: I love the reviews, thanks again!**

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They arrived back at her house and he followed her inside. The pair made their way into the living room where a wide awake Holly, and an outwardly dead-tired Lucy were playing. Rachael walked over to Lucy,

_"You can go up, thanks so much."_ The nanny nodded half asleep and left up the stairs.

_"Hello Holly."_ He said from the doorway. The toddler instantly recognized his voice and scurried over to him as fast as her little unstable legs could carry her. He picked her up hugging her tightly, then looked back over at Rachael who at the moment was picking up toys. Every time she bent over to grab one she could see her face contort in pain.

_"Why don't you go take a shower, Holly can keep me company."_ She looked apprehensive for a moment but surrendered and left the same exit as Lucy.

He put the baby down on the floor. Then kicked off his shoes, took off his dress coat, and rolled up the sleeves of his white dress shirt before getting down to her level.

_"How are you, Hol's?"_ He asked as she handed him a slobbered elephant toy.

_"I met your mummy today, do you know that?"_ He asked having a one sided conversation with himself, _"She looks just like yer Auntie Rachael."_ The baby looked up at him and smiled before crawling over to her toy pile and grabbing a small soft foam picture book. She brought it back over and crawled onto his lap. He gave her a kiss on the top of her head and continued their discussion.

_"Well we were at a party with yer Auntie Mo and Uncle Ritch, and your Auntie Rachael was looking very pretty. She had me going mad, so I let her go off into the bathroom alone, and not 10 minutes later yer mum came out."_ He informed her, "_She told yer Auntie that she gets to keep you forever, and ever. Isn't that fantastic, love?"_ The baby leaned back into him with her eyes fixated on the T.V. screen. He ran a hand over her soft hair and smiled to himself trying to comprehend how the hell Kelley didn't want this child? Ever since the three kids came into his life he couldn't imagine being without any of them.

_"But we also have something serious to talk about, Hol's."_ Paul picked her up and brought her over to the kitchen, grabbing an already made bottle from the fridge. He walked into another sitting room slightly off of the kitchen. He took a seat on one of the couches in the darkened room propping Holly up at a gentle angle between his upraised knees facing him. The baby regarded him solemnly, her wide, dark brown doe eyes fixed upon his face. He began telling the baby his troubles, not that she had any clue what he was talking about, she just watched him with a peaceful, understanding expression.

_"Well you see, Hol's. I think yer Auntie is sick. The problem is she won't tell me what the matter is."_ He raised the bottle to her lips, the little girl kept her eyes locked on his, "And it scares me." He kept quiet for a moment wiping off the excess dribble from the bottle and continued,

_"And I know I haven't been around lately to see you… I'm sorry for that."_ He gently apologized, _"We had an argument… we were both acting silly. I shouldn't have called her that mean name."_ He heard the pipes go on and the water start above, Rachael must've just gotten in the shower. _"I don't know what to do, Hol's. I know yer Auntie is sick, I want to help her."_ He studied the baby for a moment. Her eyes were still trained on his, continuing to work on the bottle.

_"Can I tell you a secret?"_ The baby continued to watch at him; he took this as a Yes.

_"She's pregnant."_ The child looked unaffected, _"There's going to be two of them."_ He let out a sigh collecting his thoughts.  
_"I have another secret too."_ He reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring box, _"I've been carrying this around every day since I bought it."_ Paul opened the box to give the baby a look. _"But I know it's going to be a long time… a really long time until we're even on the right terms. And still even then… I don't think she would marry me."_ The baby finished her bottle, and Paul put it down on the floor next to them. She replaced the bottle with her thumb.

_"The thing is Hol's is that I think she won't marry me because she's scared… of what? I have no clue... but she's definitely frightened. But every time I talk to her she gives me the same answer 'I'm fine' and I accept it… because I don't want t' make her upset."_ The baby snuggled into him placing her chin on his chest to watch him talk. _"I just don't know what to do anymore. I love her… a lot. I don't think she even knows."_ The water was still running overhead; he took this as a bit odd. It had nearly been half an hour since she had started it. He got up carrying the baby in the nook of his arm up the stairs and into Rachael's room. He jiggled the handle of her bathroom door,

_"Rach."_ Paul called turning the knob again. _"Hey, you locked the door."_ This surprised him, she never really locked the bathroom door.

_"What?"_ She shouted to him.

_"I said, the door 's locked."_ He shouted back.

_"I'm in the shower, who is it?"_ She called out.

_"It's Paul."_ He got no response. She must've not heard him. He walked over to her bed and took a seat letting the baby crawl all over. A few minutes later the water stopped and he heard her getting out… then a loud thud. His heart just about jumped out of his chest.

_"Rach?"_ He nearly shouted, then remembered the others sleeping not 15 feet down the hallway.

Rachael's P.O.V.

The pain was back. This time nearly blinding. Paul told me he'd take care of Holly so I could go take a shower, which I was appreciative for. I got in and tried to get everything done quickly. I just couldn't. Every time I moved I nearly threw up. I finally slunk down to the bottom of the shower, wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I nearly nodded off, I finally stood back up and shampooed, conditioned, and scrubbed everything. I still couldn't fathom getting out, the pain was too much. I heard someone's knock come from outside the door,

_"What?"_ I called putting on a seemingly normal voice, or so I hoped. There was no response,

_"I'm in the shower, who is it?"_ I tried again. Still no answer. I put it out of my mind, I was probably just hearing things. Another flash of pain ripped through my middle. I steadied myself on the wall and turned off the water, letting it somewhat pass. As I stepped out I slipped, gashing my thigh against the glass door. I bit my thumb trying not to cry out,

_"Rach?"_ I heard Paul shout. Shit, I can't let him see this, he'll overreact, I thought.

_"Yes?"_ I replied biting back the pain.

_"Are you okay, it sounded like you fell?"_ It sounded like he was right outside the door,

_"Yeah, I'm okay. I just dropped something."_ I lied.

_"Oh… okay. Holly and I are out here. Call if you need anything."_ I nodded to myself and looked down to inspect the damage. It was oozing blood. I reached over to my side and grabbed a handful of toilet papers to wipe it off. Ironically the gash was in the same place as my old scar, I had gotten that from a near similar incident with a car door when I was 10. I wiped off as much blood as I could, the cut was fairly deep, definitely painful; but nothing compared to my stomach. I stood up and went under the sink to the Band-Aids placing them along the cut, it only took 4 of them placed side to side. I then busied myself drying my hair and throwing on my robe before I went out.

Paul was sitting on the bed with Holly when I came out, he watched as I tried to walk as normally as I could to the closet. Each time I extended my leg, a surge would run up my body. I got in the closet and threw on the biggest old T-shirt I could find. A knock came from the closet door,

_"I'm coming in."_ Was all he said, he opened the door, I could see Holly crawling around on the floor outside.

_"You fell."_ He simply stated. I stared at Paul like an idiot, I couldn't think straight to follow up my lie. _"I saw the blood on the paper in the bathroom."_ I looked away, he was too damn nosy.

_"Where?"_ He asked. I didn't look him in the eye. Another surge of ache came and I bit my lip.

_"Come 'ead Rach. I just want to see it."_ He asked again quietly. I finally relented and pulled up the T-shirt enough to expose the Band-Aids. He got down on a knee and gently peeled them away, then took a sharp inhale of breath looking up at me.

_"You're going t' need stitches."_ My mind reeled at the thought, no way. It really wasn't that bad, last time it happened it healed up just fine without them.

_"It's not that bad."_ I tried to reassure him, _"It'll be okay."_ He replaced the bandage and stood up, looking at me with those eyes. I hated when he looked at me like that, like he knew better than I, like he was in charge. I was the fucking adult here; I didn't need him ordering me around about how to take care of myself.

_"Darling."_ He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. _"Just promise me, if it doesn't stop bleeding in the next hour, you'll let me take you in."_ I reluctantly mumbled a promise and went out past him to get Holly.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was surprised that she actually promised to let him take her in if it got any worse. She went past him, apparently going for the baby.  
_"Rach, I'll get her, seriously just go lay down."_ He asked, in a more authoritative tone. Rachael stopped in her tracks and turned around to look at him. It was a blank gaze, nothing more, nothing less. Nonetheless it was still a stare down. He won, and she went over to bed and got under the covers. He went for the baby and took her down the hall to her room placing her in the crib,

_"Right then Hol's. See I told ya. She's sick, and she won't even let me help her."_ The baby was lying on her back looking up at him with a thumb in her mouth. He gently rubbed her tummy,

_"Promise me Hol's, if you get sick again, you'll let me take care of you okay?"_ Her eyes started to flutter, and he stayed until she had at last fallen asleep. Paul gave her a kiss on the forehead, and made his way out back down the hallway. He peeked his head into Rachael's room. The lights were off, the only light came out from behind him in the hallway flooding in rays into the room. He gently tiptoed in and turned on the lamp light carefully shielding her from it until at last he knew she was facing away. He got into the bed careful not to disturb her sleeping form and folded down the cover's until her left leg was partially exposed up to the band-aid. He peeled it off again; thankfully it had stopped bleeding and was beginning to scab. No emergency room visit tonight. The phone rang, and Rachael woke up fumbling her hands over to the table to retrieve it, she didn't even know he was in the bed.

_"Hello?"_ She mumbled, he could hear a man's voice through the silence, she sat up finally noticing him and stared at him while listening.

_"How?"_ She looked shocked, no longer tired. She then began speaking in Greek. Paul hadn't a clue what she was saying. It was a long phone call. He sat there waiting for her to be finished and then finally she put down the phone staring at the wall ahead.

_"My Uncle's dead."_ She said. Paul felt awful, she was having a horrible night. _"I have to bring the kids with me tomorrow. We're staying in York, the rest of the family is flying in after the funeral."_ He listened, he wished there was something he could do.

_"I'm sorry."_ He finally said. She barely looked up. She just stared straight ahead,

_"Nothing to be sorry for. What happened, happened."_ He was surprised, there were no tears, she didn't look upset, just… nothing.

_"What are you going up to York for?"_ He asked,

_"There's a law office up there. My uncle was the one my dad willed everything to after he died. He has been pretty much dealing with all my legal stuff… since forever. I have to go deal with it now."_ He nodded, he was basically going through the same thing. After Brian had died none of them had a clue what to do, Brian was the one who took care of everything. They had been looking for some time for a new manager… no one could replace Brian though… he was too good.

_"How long will you be staying there?"_ He quieried, she shrugged.

_"Hopefully a day or two. I really don't know."_ He wanted to go desperately to help, but the new album was coming out. It was going to get busy.** Fuck the album.**

_"Are you bringing the kids?"_ He questioned.

_"Yeah. I have to. They are the ones who get everything if I die."_ He nodded. He really had to update his Will too.

The pair stayed silent for a while, he honestly didn't know what to say or what to do. He could see her stomach contracting… he knew she was still in pain. He finally gave up, and laid down next to her and grabbed her hand.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't know what to do. I was nearly sure I was going to pass out from the pain in my stomach… my Uncle Vinny had just died, and now I had to go to York tomorrow to figure out all of this legal stuff… why was this all happening at once.

I finally noticed Paul had grabbed my hand and was lying next to me. We both looked ahead at the wall for a while hopelessly lost. I finally glanced out of the corner of my eye and caught him staring at me with that look again. I hated it, it was like he was pitying me.

_"Don't look at me like that."_ I said sadly.

Paul frowned a bit, _"Look at you like what?"_

_"You look at me like I'm broken."_ He took in a sharp intake of breath,

_"You're not broken."_ I had to admit, Paul looked like hell at the moment. I probably wasn't looking so hot either. He pulled me so I was lying half on top of him, and turned out the light. I didn't even know where to start.

_"Sometimes I want to quit."_ I finally admitted. He nodded and listened, _"And you know, be normal for a while."_ I instantly shot up,

_"Where's Holly?"_ He eased me back down putting an arm around my middle. He still smelt faintly of the club, cigarettes and booze.

_"She's fine. I put her to bed, remember?"_ I felt awful. Holly was my responsibility, and I couldn't even manage that.

_"Paul, I'm a horrid mother."_ He instantly turned me so I was facing him, he had a stern expression,

_"Don't you think, or say that ever again, do you hear me?"_ I shook my head, not believing a word he was saying. "_Rach, you need to stop beating yourself up. You do an amazing job with all of them."_ I started crying. Everything hit me at once. My Uncle was dead, I was sick, my sister wasn't coming back, Tessa wasn't coming back. Everything had changed, nothing was familiar anymore. I was scared, of what… change. I was terrified of change. It seemed to be happening far too often in these past few months.

Paul's P.O.V.

She broke down and lost it. Honestly, he didn't blame her. It seemed these past couple of months had just gotten worse and worse for her. She was now sobbing uncontrollably into her pillow. He sat up leaning against the headboard and pulled her back over until she was crying into his chest. He quietly smoothed back her hair, and rocked. There wasn't much he could do except be there.

_"Shhhh.. Everything'll be fine, love."_ He tried to console, more for himself than for just her. She pressed even farther into his chest and his grip tightened until he was sure they could never be pried apart. Each time a sob came her body locked itself, he was nearly sure she was going to pass out.

_"Easy, easy, easy."_ He tried to get her to calm down, he had never seen her this hysterical before. _"You're going to be okay. We'll get through this."_ He attempted again. He could feel her stomach squeezing pressed up against his, he was frantic, what in the world was he going to do?

**An Hour.**

An hour had past and still she was sobbing, this was agony. His shirt was neary soaked through with tears, he didn't want to let go of her, afraid of what would happen if he did. Tears were making salty trails down his face as well. _Tears of confusion. Tears of sadness. Tears of loneliness. Tears of fear._ At last she had tired herself out. He nearly got down on his knees and thanked God. Rachael hiccupped a few times and passed out. Paul tried to pull himself together, taking one hand away from his grip to wipe away the sadness. A thought slipped through his head, Martha. The poor dog needed to be let out, he couldn't just leave her inside. He sighed, a war going on in his head. He wanted to stay, but he knew taking care of the dog was the right thing to do. Besides it was around 2 o'clock now, morning was only a few hours away, he could come back again.

_"Rachael."_ He whispered, and shook her gently, just enough to get her somewhat aware of his impending absence. _"I have to go take care of the dog, I'll be back in the morning okay?"_ She nodded sleepily, he gave her a peck on the cheek and got up to go take care of his dog.


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: Hey, I let my cousin write this chapter. I like it, it's fluffy! :)**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't want to be alone anymore… in truth I was scared to be alone at night now. When Paul left I silently tiptoed down the hallway and packed the kids suitcases for the trip tomorrow, then quickly packed mine. I went back to bed, it was 3:30 now, the windows had adapted a light frost over them, and the house was dead silent. I could hear everything… and nothing. I was scared to death to say the least, I felt like a little kid afraid of the monster in her closet. I finally gave up with a few tears still sliding down my cheeks and reached for the phone.

_"Paul?"_

Paul's P.O.V.

He got home and took care of the dog, Martha was unhappy.

_"'M sorry."_ He apologized to the creature. She forgave him and trotted off to the backyard to do her business. She returned back inside and immediately went to go lay in front of the heater, the early December chill had gotten to her. Paul went off on his own way taking a shower, then going to the music room. He had no desire to sleep… that was until he heard the phone ring,

_"Paul?"_ It was Rachael. He swallowed,

_"Yeah, love?"_ He heard her sniffle,

_"Come back over… please?"_

_"Gimme 5 minutes."_ He promised before hanging up. He dutifully made his way down the stairs, with a sudden serenity and calm… _he needed her just as much as she needed him._

When he got to the house all was silent. He tiptoed up the staircase quickly peeking into each of the children's room to check on them. Holly was fine. Both Lily and Will were snuggled up in her bedroom, still never wanting to be more than an arm's length away from each other. Then the farthest stretch to Rachael's. He wordlessly got inside taking off his shoes and jacket before climbing under the cover.

_"'M glad you called."_ He whispered, she turned to face him. The tears were gone, her pale face was the only thing he could see now,

_"I am too."_ She said, looking right at him, the pair locked eyes not really knowing what to say next. She finally flipped over and readjusted herself under the covers. Against his better judgment he pulled himself closer then nestled into her figure locking the pair together. He put one arm around her front caressing the bump on her still-almost flat stomach.

_"I love you."_ He whispered into her hair breathing in her perfume-like scent. She nodded slightly halfway still asleep,

_"I know."_ And for the first time, they were at peace.

Morning on the other hand was a different story.

_"I said not to do that Lillian!"_ William shrieked shoving a plastic bowl at her. Lillian took her spoon fending him off,

_"It's mine William!"_ She shouted back. Both children ripped off their clothes and started wrestling. Paul looked across the room at Lucy, neither knew what to do.

Earlier this morning he had decided to let Rachael sleep in, she'd had a tough night. He and Lucy were trying to get the kids ready for the day. The children on the other hand wouldn't stop arguing from the second they opened their eyes. Holly was in Paul's arms watching the fight as it unfolded.

_"Let go of me hair!"_ William shouted as Lily grabbed a handful.

_"Give me the **bloody** spoon back or I'll bite you!"_ She threatened. The two 5 year olds had a hold on each other's hair while shouting using vivid language… he had to clean up his language around them… they'd obviously picked it up. He turned around when he heard a loud ear piercing whistle- Rachael had come down. The room went silent as it rang out.

_"Stop."_ Was all she threatened. Both Lily and William let go of each other's hair with a dumbfounded expression. _"Clothes on."_ She commanded. The two kids scrambled helping each other back into clothes they had ripped off in heat of the argument.

_"Explain."_ She ordered. The two children looked at each other and Will started,

_"Lily tooked my bowl. So I tooked her spoon."_ He explained quietly looking down at his feet. Then Lily took over,

_"So I grabbed his hairs and we fighted."_ Both children looked guilty refusing to make eye contact with any of the adults.

_"Are you friends again?"_ Rachael asked placidly. They nodded profusely. _"Okay make peace."_ Both children gave each other a hug and a sloppy kiss. _If only being an adult was that simple;_ he thought.

Lucy went back to helping them with breakfast, and he was staring at Rachael, how the hell did she take care of that so quickly; he mused. She still looked sick, too.

"_Good morning."_ He said smiling, she gave a halfhearted effort and walked past him to clean up some of the mess. Paul went back to Holly, she was content with just being held- she was such an easy baby, she rarely fussed unless something was clearly wrong.

_"We're taking a trip today."_ Rachael announced to the older kids.

_"Where?"_

_"Up to York."_ The 5 year olds started dumbly at her having no idea what that was.

_"It's a town. We're staying in a hotel. There's some stuff we have to sort out with Mommy's family."_ They nodded taking this as an acceptable answer and continued eating brekky.

Rachael went over to Lucy to discuss something as well and a thought popped into his head…

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"Do you think you can make the trip? You'll get a bonus and I'll double the rate per hour?"_ The nanny nodded,

_"Of course I can make the trip, how long?"_ I shrugged,

_"I think about two days. All you have to do is keep the kids occupied, the lawyers want them there just in case."_ Lucy nodded again, I was thankful her schedule was so flexible. Everything was nearly set, we could get going within the next hour.

_"Mummy, is daddy coming?"_ Lily called, I cringed and turned back to her looking over at Paul.

_"Daddy 's busy, but I'll call everyday, and I'll come and pick you up? How does that sound?"_ Paul tried to explain. Will and Lil looked at each other, and decided not to fight it they nodded obviously not pleased with the turn of events. I went over to where he was, informing him of my plans.

Paul's P.O.V.

_"Lucy is coming with me to take care of the kids. We'll hopefully be done with this mess in two days alright?"_ Paul nodded he was still mulling over his previous thought; what if he took Holly so they wouldn't have to worry about the baby? Holly was still content in his arms playing with the watch he was wearing.

_"And you'll call me when it's over, promise? I want t' pick you all up."_ He asked. She agreed. She was about to turn away but he grabbed her hand,

_"Wait Rach, one more thing,"_ He looked down at the baby, _"What if Holly stayed with me? Then you an Lucy would only have to deal with the older two."_ Rachael looked apprehensive. Suddenly he regretted asking- _on second thought,_ no he didn't. He wanted Holly to stay with him.

_"I don't know Paul…"_ She trailed off,

_"Come 'ead, love. It'll make it easier on you, she can stay with me."_ Rachael bit her bottom lip, she knew he was right.

_"What about your album?"_ He hadn't thought of that. He had to go over to the studio today, they had paper's to sign and it was going to be released in January.

_"I only have papers to sign today. Holly can keep me company."_ Rachael studied the baby in his arms. He knew he was helping her out, she was still ill- even if she wasn't saying so. He was helping himself out too- being lonely had gotten the best of him.

_"Are you sure?"_ She finally asked, he was overjoyed,

_"Positive."_ Rachael finally agreed and wrote down numbers for him to call,

_"Call Maureen if she's too much, alright?"_ She ordered. He nodded,

_"And if you're taking her out, wrap her up really warm. I don't want her catching a cold."_ He listened intently, taking care of her couldn't- _wouldn't_ be that hard.

20 minutes later a car came for them. Paul said goodbye to the older kids who bounded over staking their claim at a seat, and to Rachael who he pecked on the cheek and promised everything would be alright and just as Lucy was about to walk out of the house he stopped her,

_"Listen,"_ He said pulling her off to the side, _"Rachael's been under the weather lately."_ The nanny nodded,

_"I've noticed. Was she sick last night too?"_ He grimaced, it was pretty obvious.

_"Do me a favor, yeah?"_ Lucy nodded, _"Keep an eye on 'er, if she gets any worse gimme a call. I can be down there in an hour er two."_ He thanked her and sent the family on their way. Watching them pull out of the drive… he hated, but suddenly it wasn't so bad, he had Holly to talk to.

_"Let's get you ready and over to daddy's house, yeah? Martha needs to be fed."_ Paul stopped short on the way over to get her nappy changed realizing what he had just said, **'daddy'**. He wasn't her dad, he sighed,

_"One day I'll be it for real, Hol's. One day."_


	33. Chapter 33

Paul's P.O.V.

He made quick work of caring for Holly. Nappy changed, cleaned up, dressed, fed and happily watching him move around Rachael's kitchen from her highchair in less than half an hour.

_"Whaddya say we do today, love?"_ Paul cooed to the baby cleaning up some of the mess in the kitchen, he then glanced at the clock, it was only 10 o'clock. They had to be by the studio at four. He finished placing dishes and cups into the sink figuring the maid would get rest of it, then located the baby carrier. He bundled her up in her little blanket and strapped her in grabbing the diaper bag, finally making his way to the car.

When he arrived at his house there were a few more gatebirds than usual, some of them wouldn't move to let the car pass, he rolled down his window just a tad,

_"Girls, move please."_ He asked. Some of the faces he recognized- they were the usual's who kept vigil of the property obsessively, other's were new. Lately the press had been all over him about his kids and Rachael. Paul was pretty sure that Rachael ignored the papers, she never really said anything about them. More than once they had published pictures of the kids- that he wouldn't tolerate. It was fine and in fair game that they printed pictures of him- even Rachael. But when they published the kids they had taken it a step too far.

He tried honking the horn, they still didn't move, he rolled down the window even further,

_"Ladies please?"_ A rather ticked off one stood there with her arms crossed like she owned the place,

_"Where's the whore?"_ She sneered. He took a deep breath trying not to let his anger get the best of him,

_"I don't know what whore you're talking about, but if you're talkin' about me girl Rachael, she's busy. Move so I can get me car in the drive, please."_ She rolled her eyes and her little band of friends stayed put. He threw up his hands in frustration, if only he could simply run them over! He glanced over to the side of him, Holly was still seated happily in her carrier tugging on her ear with one hand and sucking the other's thumb. He sighed, and pulled off the short curb and parked on the street, grabbing the carrier and the diaper bag. He walked up to the gate unhappily, he couldn't even get his car on his bloody property without someone interfering. Paul and Holly got to the code box silently punching in numbers.

_"Who's the baby?"_ One of the newer birds asked. She didn't seem rude at all, simply curious unlike the other obnoxious one. He smiled thankful he wasn't being challenged again,

_"This is me girl, Holly."_ He went through the gates making sure they closed and he didn't have any unexpected visitors before entering the house, he put the carrier down in the front hall entrance unwrapping his scarf while Martha came skidding in on the tile slipping past them, the dog sat in front of the carrier, Paul watched carefully as he took off his coat and hung it up. He could see Holly's hands reach up anxiously to try to take a handful of the dogs soft fur, Martha let her, placing her giant head on the baby's legs. Holly tugged at the dogs ears and patted them down, Martha's tongue got her face and Holly busted up in giggles. Paul smiled to himself then crouched down to let Holly free. Once unbundled from the blanket and her onesie readjusted she crawled off with the dog following her close behind.

Paul got busy himself getting the dog some food, and letting her out. Holly came over and sat on his feet as he was going through a note the housekeeper had left, apparently the gatebirds had been leaving more notes than usual… some not very pleasant notes and she had left a box of them in the front room. He was about to read them but thought better of it and decided to throw them out.

_"Ah Hol's. I don't even know why they care, it's none of their business."_ He sighed picking up the baby, he wasn't complaining about the attention- it was the reason he had a job. He just wished that the fans… _more specifically_ the gatebirds stopped acting like they owned him.

He brought the baby and the carrier up to the music room, he put her in and put it on top of the piano so he was nearly eye level with him.

_"Listen to this one."_ He said quietly, he began playing, and playing, and playing. Holly was listening the whole time, not making a peep it truly seemed like she was focusing.

Time got away from them and before he knew it, it was time to go to the studio. He glanced down at his watch practically shocked, it was already 3 o'clock. The pair had missed lunch and a big chunk of the day.

_"Hol's let's get going, okay?"_ He affirmed. He quickly got her a bottle and bundled back up in the carrier, he was getting pretty good at this, hopefully the next two kids would be this easy.

They were actually the last to arrive at the studio, Paul came in all smiles with his little date, Geo looked decidedly hung-over leaning back in a chair with his hands covering his eyes. Ritch was stationed on the phone next to him, John and Yoko were holding each other on a bench near the back wall. He decided not to say much, he could feel the tension in the air, you could cut it with a knife.

_"No he's right 'ere."_ Ritch said into the receiver giving Paul a small smile, he motioned for him to come over. Ritch put down the phone for a moment and skillfully unbundled Holly from her carrier and blankets, holding the baby up for inspection checking appendages, fingers, and toes; finally giving her a tickle before handing her back to Paul. He was confused but nonetheless took the baby back, Ritch returned to the phone,

"_No she's in one piece. She seems fine."_ Ritch chuckled into the phone.

_"Yeah, I'll tell him."_ He finally said before hanging up, Paul looked at the drummer completely bewildered, Ringo noticed,

_"It was Mo. Rachael called her to tell her to tell me to check up on the baby."_ Paul chuckled, God save the day Maureen Starkey wasn't in someone else's business. He heard whispers behind him, Yoko was telling something to John. Paul watched them for a moment before returning to the couch to take a seat with Holly.

_"Is **'it'** yours?"_ John asked. Paul didn't know how to take the comment and shrugged,

_"'**She'** 's mine and Rachael's."_ The tension in the room was thick as an impending stare down took place between the two men.

_"Didn't know you could get 'em in a package deal."_ John sneered. Paul was appalled at the comment,

_"Shut yer trap, Lennon. When 'er you gonna pull the stick outta yer-"_ George cut him off with a shout,

_"Ladies, you're both pretty. Just shut up, the courier will be 'ere in a bleedin' minute. Then we can get the fuck outta 'ere."_ He honestly didn't even know where to begin, he hadn't even said anything to John, he started it. Him and his stupid Yoko.

They waited until the courier arrived, and delivered the documents. Paul scanned them over bouncing the baby in his lap, he didn't have a clue to any of this. He already knew the album was shite; it was all their leftover songs from months earlier. The document was basically a stack of legal crap he needed to sign off on. Brian used to do this for them he didn't even know what he was signing. He shrugged putting it out of his mind, the band really needed to find someone to take care of this rubbish for them. He was second last to finish, George reluctantly followed- Paul knew he was thinking the same thing. They didn't even know what they were doing.

_"Right then. See you lot in the new year."_ John said walking out. George left close behind grumbling to himself about never drinking again. He and Ritch were the last ones left,

_"Don't let John get to you. He's had a time of it."_ He said, Paul knew the divorce proceedings for John and Cynthia would be finished off tomorrow.

_"Yeah, well. He's not the only one."_ Paul mumbled rebinding the baby. Ritch walked past him patting Holly on the head with a shrug,

_"It'll get better, just leave 'em alone 'till break 's over."_ Ritch finally commented on the way out,

_"Oh and tell Rachael I say hi. Mo never lets me talk t' her."_ And left. Paul let out a sigh, all they needed was a break from the studio- each man had their own thing to deal with.

The pair went home, thankfully the gatebirds had left, it was simply too cold out to gawk at his comings and goings. When he got inside he changed Holly and left her downstairs while he went upstairs and changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt. He was suddenly exhausted- there was too much going on, not to mention he only got 3 hours of sleep the night before.

Paul brought the baby over to the couch cuddling with her under a blanket, and quietly singing, she was out like a light in under a minute. He stayed awake a bit longer flipping through channels on the telly before dozing off.

**_"It will be all right, just let it be."_ It was mum. She was standing next to him smiling, never in a million years would he ever had believed it. She was looking down at the baby cuddled up to him on his chest, hundreds of thoughts flew through his head, how? She just nodded, he remembered her so vividly mum died when he was 14- he looked down at Holly as well, the baby was sleeping while moving her lips like she was whispering- to the angels he remembered. Did she know? Did mum know how much he missed her, how he wished she had been around, around to meet his kids- to see a final time? Mum looked back up at him locking eyes with a proud smile, a smile he remembered so well. A feeling of comfort washed over him.**

**_"It will be all right, just let it be."_ Mary repeated and she left.**

Paul woke up feeling dazed and disoriented, looking down at the baby who was still sleeping, and moving her tiny lips- she knew. And for that he was grateful. He snuggled her closer pulling the blanket just a bit higher, he could see it beginning to snow outside. The window panes fogging up slightly from the contrast of heat within the house and the bitter blustery weather outside. He began humming the melody again, the one he couldn't figure out earlier. It began forming in his head slightly, he knew he'd remember it. It was going to be great.

He awoke a second time to the phone ringing, he brought the still-sleeping baby with him to the kitchen grabbing it while rocking her,

_"'Lo?"_ He mumbled,

_"Hi, daddy!"_ Both Lily and Will said in unison, Paul smiled.

_"Hey, how are you?"_ Both children gave him a rundown of the day; at points interrupting each other, or finishing a sentence. But they seemed to be okay. Apparently a multitude of cousins were there to play with- they didn't seem in the least bit bored, when they finally finished Paul was at peace.

_"Can I talk to yer mummy then?"_ He could hear the phone ruffle,

_"She's at a meeting."_ Will said. Paul rocked Holly some more leaning against the back wall,

_"Can I talk to Lucy then?"_ The phone shuffled again being passed down the line,

_"Hello?"_ Came the nanny's voice.

_"How is she?"_ He asked, he didn't know what to think.

_"She's… tired. Definitely tired. Shes been in meetings all day."_ Paul sighed,

_"Has she been- well you know?"_ He heard her walking around a corner for some privacy,

_"Yeah. This morning. She wouldn't eat after. She had lunch, but after that it was no good."_ His shoulders sunk, just let it be; he remembered.

_"Should I come down?"_

_"I don't think it's crucial. How about I'll tell her to give you a call when she comes back from the meeting?"_ He nodded into the receiver,

_"Good. Thanks Lucy."_

_"No problem."_ He could hear her talking to the kids as she hung up. He did as well. Paul slunk back to the couch into slumber, the baby breathing softly against him.

Morning hit, he decided it was going to be a lazy day. It was the first actual day of break, and he didn't want to go anywhere for once.

_"Lazy day, Hol's."_ He informed the baby, who still smiled at him. She hadn't fussed at all since Rachael's departure. The nine and a half month old was trying to crawl on top of a half-asleep Martha, who couldn't care less that a 16 pound little girl was fascinated with her fur, the dog probably thought she was just another puppy.

Paul sat down with a newspaper and a cup of tea, mulling over the day's events when the gate started buzzing. He got up a little perturbed that someone was interrupting his solitude only to discover that it was Maureen. He pressed the button on the speaker,

_"Whaddya want?"_ He chuckled,

_"Let me in, Paulie. It's cold!"_ She whined.

_"Magic word."_ He commanded, a string of curses could be heard from her end, Maureen really had a mouth on her when she wanted something. He finally relented with a laugh and buzzed her in. She got to the door nearly shoving him out of the way to get into the house,

_"You're awful!"_ She whined rubbing her arms for warmth. He smiled,

_"To what do I owe the pleasure, Mrs. Maureen?"_ She laughed and went past him making herself at home with a cup of tea.

_"I came to check on the baby."_ Paul chuckled again,

_"Ritch checked on her yesterday though."_ She sipped at her tea and went over to inspect the child. Holly laughed as Maureen spread her out on the floor checking arms and legs while taking a quick count of toes and fingers.

_"No missing limbs."_ Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What did ya think was going to happen?"_ She shrugged and laughed,

_"I didn't believe Ritchie yesterday when he said she was okay. Rachael told me to keep an eye on you two."_ Paul rolled his eyes with a small grin, if only Rachael worried this much about herself.

_"Yeah well, we're doing alright. We had to eat Martha's food last night though, since I haven't a clue how to cook. Oh, and Holly's been real bad with the drinking and smoking."_ He teased. Maureen swatted at him and refastened her coat,

_"You're an idiot."_ She then walked by giving him a peck on the cheek,_ "Ring if you need anything!"_ and she scurried out the door.

Paul laughed to himself and went back to the newspaper, he and Holly spent the day in mostly silence. Finally the phone rang,

_"Hello?"_

_"Hey. Lucy said to call you back."_ Her voice sounded rough… hopefully it was just the connection.

_"Yeah, 'm just checking in. Holly and I are okay, how are you?"_ He could hear her cough,

_"I… I'll be alright."_ He looked down at the tiled floor following the grout lines with his eyes,

_"How are the meetings going?"_ He could hear her laugh sadly,

_"They suck."_ He nodded pressing his forehead against the wall,

_"When are they going to be finished?"_

_"I don't exactly know. Not today. I doubt tomorrow."_ There was trepidation in her voice, he knew she didn't want to be there.

_"What if Holly and I came up tomorrow night?"_ He asserted. He wanted to be there to help.

_"Yeah. If you want. If not I'll have Lucy come back to get the baby-"_

_"No, no, no. I'll be there. Maureen stopped by, you just missed her."_ He could hear her smiling- if you could hear such a thing.

_"Yeah, I know. How did the album thing go?"_ He decided not to pour out his anger over that 'situation' on the phone.

_"It sucked."_ He said agreeing to her previous statement. He could hear voices in the background,

_"I've got to go. Talk to you later."_ She hung up before he could respond. He put the phone back, the baby was staring sleepily up at him with her eyes squinted. Paul grinned and loudly kissed her and gave her a tickle. She was amused for a while, then promptly plunked her head back against his chest and passed out.

Paul went on sleeping, dinner time came and he warmed up whatever was left in the fridge dropping some for the dog, and tearing off little pieces for the baby. After she was fed and cleaned up, he brought her upstairs to play while he packed a bag for himself and the impending trip when the phone rang again, this time it was Lucy.

_"Uhm Mr. McCartney?"_ Lucy asked hesitantly.

_"It's Paul, love. What's the matter?"_ He heard her sigh a little bit,

_"Uh well, I feel like I'm tattling but… Rachael got worse."_ He felt bad for the nanny's discomfort,

_"You're not tattling, what's the matter?"_ Lucy's voice got remarkably lower, like she didn't want to get caught.

_"After the meetings today, she was** like** really pale. She was trying to help out with the kids but she couldn't move. It looked **like** she was really hurting. So I was **like,** go lay down and she was **like**, okay. So she did and I put Lil and Will to bed, and now I heard her in the bathroom, she's been in there for **like** an hour, and the whole time she's been sick and I don't know what to do, **like** if I should call her family over or something because they're staying on a lower floor. But then I'm **like,** no, because I **like** don't want to make her upset-"_ Paul cut off the girls nervous rambling,

"Lucy. Thanks for calling. I'll be down there in a bit." He heard her let out a sigh of relief,

_"Okay, no problem… just, **like,** hurry or something?"_ Even through his worry he had to chuckle at the American girl's slang he had never heard a person use the word 'like' so many times in a conversation before. He hung up and finished packing then made a few calls for a car to come pick them up. He would've drove himself, but he didn't want to have to pull off on the side of the road if it was freezing, and Holly needed something. Besides he was too anxious to be bothered with driving.

What in the world was wrong with Rachael?


	34. Chapter 34

Paul's P.O.V.

The ride up to York was horrid. The M1 was packed, not to mention it was snowing and Paul was fairly sure that the driver couldn't see more than a foot in front of them the entire time. Holly was asleep during the ride which left Paul incredibly bored, alone with worry.

He got into the rather secure hotel around 12. He had the front desk call up, and he was handed a room key. He got into the lift making his way up. He finally got to the top floor, which apparently was being rented out by Rachael's entire family. The last suite on the left was hers. He got in quietly making sure not to disturb anyone, in case they were sleeping.

The room reminded him fairly of the one in Greece. A master suite down the long hallway, a kitchen, a sitting room, and two other bedrooms which he assumed were being used for the kids and baby sitter- he was right. The bellhop left their bags in the front hallway. Lucy was on the couch half asleep when he arrived,

"_Hello, Lucy."_ He greeted walking in, she sat up rubbing her eyes,

"_Hey."_ The poor girl had just been woken up,

_"Sorry fer waking you."_ He apologized, she shook her head,

_"I was waiting until you got here. Rachael went back to the meeting."_ Paul found this quite strange,

_"It's midnight?"_ She shrugged,

"_Time change, they're all from America."_ He shifted the sleeping child to his other shoulder,

"_Why don't you go to bed? I'll take Holly with me to go find her. Are Will and Lily asleep?"_ She nodded,

_"Alright, they're on the bottom floor in the conference rooms."_ She dug around for something on the coffee table handing him a swipe card, "You're going to need this to get in." Paul took it and left with Holly to conference room 2B as it directed on the card.

He swiped his way in and walked down the eerily long hallway he could hear arguing and strains of people shouting.

_"He willed it to me!"_ Came an angry voice, immediately others around him were in uproar,

_"No, it's mine you bastard!"_ Other heated voices could be heard around them calling him out. Paul decided to step in now, when he got through this door there was another hallway, this time with a long glass wall in which he could see into a board room. Around a huge wooden table were a multitude of people dressed in expensive clothing, all of whom looked pissed off. He watched the scene unfold in front of him.

One in particular stood up and started shouting curses at the bloke next to her,

_"You're an asshole, I don't even know why you're even here."_ She poured his drink onto his lap. Everyone at once stood up screaming at each other.

_"He wasn't even your brother."_ A blonde woman accused a rather tubby fellow stationed across the table,

_"He was my god-brother. It's the same thing!"_ He retorted, each couple seemed to be stationed with a lawyer, Paul had to guess there were about 20 or 30 people in the room. He spotted Rachael at the head of the table. She looked like death. She was extremely pale, little bags under her eyes starting to form. She looked almost emaciated, her cheeks were hallowing and she had the most incredibly livid face on he had ever experienced; it looked like she was ready to jump down the table and rip out someone's throat. A relatively bulky man was sitting next to her. His hair was slicked back nearly all of it being grey. They were the only two seated, watching the people in front of them go mad. The bulky man had his fist clenched on the table and finally he slammed it down,

_"Enough_." The room quieted, each person glaring at him angrily. _"Meet back here in 15 minutes."_ The atmosphere in the room instantly changed. People pulled out packs of cigarettes, drinks were poured, and suddenly Rachael spotted him peeking in from the outside, Paul was shocked but nonetheless gave her a small wave. She excused herself walking out the door and over to him.

_"Hello, darling."_ He greeted as she walked over to him, Rachael smiled a little. Paul wasn't expecting it but she opened her arms for a hug; he threw his free one round her pulling her tight, the other cradling Holly. She buried her face into his chest and let out a groan,

_"Were you watching the entire time?"_ She asked quietly, then looked up at him with a raised eyebrow, he nodded solemnly. Their eyes were locked on each other's a small grin crept onto her face and they both busted out laughing, Rachael pulled him back out into the hallway and slammed the door so no one could hear them.

_"Oh my God."_ She wheezed, _"They're all obnoxious!"_ Paul was hysterically laughing he had to admit it, the scene he just experienced was like a bad drama movie. After a few minutes they calmed down and slumped down against the wall. All was silent in the hallway when she finally looked over at him again,

_"Wait, I thought you were coming tomorrow night?"_ She asked scanning over his face, he shrugged,

_"I just thought I should be 'ere."_ He lied. He had decided not to tell Rachael that he had asked Lucy to keep an eye on her… she might've gotten upset. She nodded and peeked in the sleeping bundle at Holly,

_"Was she alright?"_ Rachael questioned, Paul nodded proudly.

_"Didn't fuss once."_ Rachael sighed, instantly the door swung open and a multitude of people peered down at them,

_"Rachael Noelle Belter, you didn't tell us that Holly was going to be here!"_ A young beak nosed woman chided. Rachael shrugged an immediate sneer appearing on her face, Paul could tell she didn't like this one.

_"I would've told you, Alexandra, if you would've shut your mouth for five seconds in there."_ The woman rolled her eyes and the rest of the group continued looking down at the three of them. Alexandra reached down to Paul for the baby, he shot a look over at Rachael. Rachael huffed but gave him a small nod as consent into handing her the child. Both of them got up and were greeted by the rest of the family. Paul stayed close to her with an arm around her waist being introduced to them all, he could feel the tension- apparently these meetings weren't going too well.

Most of them seemed nice enough, he could tell they were stressed though.

_"Rachael."_ Came a deep voice from down the hallway. Everyone stopped talking and glanced over. It was the same man who was seated next to her at the table.

_"Come here."_ He ordered, Rachael shrugged and let Paul guide her over. He waited a few feet back as the pair discussed something.

Rachael's P.O.V.

These meetings sucked. My Uncle Vincent was the one my dad willed everything to when he died. Together they had amassed quite the fortune. Now that Vincent was dead; he had left everything to Kelley and I. Well, Kelley went A.W.O.L. and so everything was left to me. My relatives were pissed, apparently they wanted a share of the wealth, and honestly I didn't blame them. At the moment I owned 13 houses, a rather large corporation and had 26 million to my name. But in truth I was fed up with it. My Uncle Theodore was the one who pretty much took over as the father figure in my life when mine had died. He and I were trying to figure this out together, Paul had showed up a day early. I had to admit I was kind of happy he was here. It gave me an excuse to leave early- _hopefully_. Theodore had called me over to have a discussion with him, he was basically the leader of the family at the moment.

_"Rach, honey. Is that Paul?"_ He asked gently. I knew he only used that tone when he talked to the kids or I. He really was the next best thing to having my own dad there,

_"Yeah. He brought Holly."_ Theodore nodded, and scanned me over,

_"I'd like ta have a talk with him, you go back into the boardroom, alright?"_ I nodded, the meeting had adjourned again, I went back over to Paul who was waiting patiently by a wall,

_"My Uncle wants to meet you."_ I said motioning over my shoulder. Paul had Holly back in his arms, he went to hand her to me but immediately she started fussing. He pulled her back and she stopped. He tried again, but each time I was about to take her she started up again.

_"I'll just take her with me then."_ Paul said chuckling. Despite feeling like shit, I smiled, and went back into the boardroom to face the family.

Paul's P.O.V.

He felt like he was being summoned to a conference with the don. He followed the man into his office taking a seat in front of his large mahogany desk.

_"Theodore Belter."_ He finally said extending a hand each of his fingers had a chunky ring on it, Paul gripped it with his free one, afraid this was going to be a repeat with his **'talk'** with Christian.

_"Paul McCartney."_ He replied. The two men sat down staring at each other, Theodore was smoking a rather large stogie. Paul was convinced he was a part of the mob. The men were silent for a few minutes before Theodore chuckled,

_"I'm glad you came."_ Paul was astonished, the man's tough exterior quickly diminished, he reminded Paul a bit of his own father._ "So you're Lily's father?"_ Paul nodded proudly,

_"Yes sir."_ Theodore chuckled,

_"Call me Teddy, kid."_ Paul instantly felt relaxed, _"You drink?"_ He questioned, not even waiting for Paul to answer before grabbing a pair of crystal glasses and poured out some gin.

_"You're Rachael's Uncle?"_ The man nodded,

_"Yea, her father's older brother. Good man Ronald was."_ Paul raised a glass before taking a sip Holly made a little noise from his lap when Teddy finally noticed her,

_"Holly?"_ He asked. Paul nodded unwrapping her a tad from the blanket to hand her over the desk. Teddy put down his cigar and drink taking the baby and studying her on his lap.

_"Ah… she looks just like Kelley."_ Paul nodded,

_"Met her. She looks exactly like Rachael."_ Teddy chuckled handing back the baby,

_"Look Paulie, I know you've been taking care of my Rachael, and I want to extend thanks on behalf of my wife and I."_ He took a sip of gin, _"When Rachael's parent's passed away, we sorta took over. She means a lot to me. So do those kids."_ Paul nodded taking in what he had to say. He didn't feel threatened at all,

_"You're a good guy. I trust you. Be good to them."_ He finally concluded. Paul was amazed, he must've been gawking because Teddy chuckled,

_"What's the matter? Afraid I was going to terrorize you?"_ Paul laughed lightly taking a sip of his drink,

_"I met Christian."_ Teddy's face scrunched up again it took him a minute before he busted out laughing taking a blow of his stogie.

_**"Walters?** That asshole?"_ He sputtered, _"Walking around thinking he's hot shit? Ah, Paulie. Ignore 'im. I can't believe Rachael actually married that dick."_ Paul laughed along with the aged gentleman,

_"He threatened to break my balls off! Honestly, I was scared out of me mind!"_ The old man crushed out his cigar in the ash tray smiling,

_"Don't worry about him. But there is something serious I'd like ta discuss."_ Teddy said, his face turning grim. Paul nodded putting down his drink and shifting the Holly's sleeping form to the other shoulder.

_"Something's wrong with Rachael, isn't it?"_ Paul felt uneasy, _"She don't look right to me. Really skinny… skinnier than usual. She don't eat neither. Have any clue?"_ Paul let out a sigh,

_"Erm well…"_ He didn't want to say it, God only knew what this bloke was going to do to him, _"She's pregnant."_ He blurted out.

The room was silent. Paul was waiting for him to pull a gun. He did no such thing, he looked thoughtful.

_"Okay."_ He folded his hands. _"I'm going to assume it is yours."_ Paul nodded profusely. _"I'm also going to assume you plan on taking care of her?"_ Paul nodded even harder, he reached inside of his pocket deciding this was the right moment and pulled out the ring box, sliding it across the surface of the table. Teddy opened it up and looked down on it for a while before closing it and sliding it back.

_"I am going t' wait a bit, until she's okay with it. But… yeah."_ Paul explained.

_"Alright then."_ He held out a hand; Paul shook it, _"Welcome to the family, son."_ Paul grinned in thanks.

Teddy poured out more drinks and before he knew it the two men were quite close. Paul genuinely respected him, Teddy was apparently trying to sort out this whole legal mess for Rachael.

It all ended too soon, they could hear shouting from the conference room. Teddy grimaced, made the sign of the cross, and stood up putting back on his tough demeanor.

_"Wait here. I'll be right back."_ He said stiffly. Paul watched him stomp out of the room.

The next few minutes were tension filled he heard screaming, cursing, and above all else silence. Rachael and Teddy strolled back in, she looked like death. She slumped down on the chair next to Paul's too exhausted to even acknowledge him.

_"Rachael, honey. We're going to settle this now. Outline exactly for me what you want."_ Teddy said calmly. Both men waited in silence for her answer.

_"Nothing. Let them have it."_ She stated coldly, Teddy closed his eyes and took a deep breath,

_"Rachael. This is serious. Are you absolutely sure?"_ She nodded. Teddy glanced over at Paul, Paul shrugged, he didn't know.

_"Listen, here's what we're going to do."_ Rachael listened, Paul could tell she trusted the man implicitly. _"I'll take some of the money and set up trust funds for the each of the children. We'll split the rest up between the Aunts and Uncles. They can choose what they want to do with it. We'll hand off the company to Constantine- he obviously wants it. Now which houses do you want to keep?"_ Rachael was messing with her little silver bracelet thinking,

_"I want the Chicago penthouse. I want the house in Germany. That's it. They can fight over the rest."_ Teddy nodded writing it all down, Paul had to admit- he was one hell of a legal consultant and lawyer, reminded him of Brian.

_"Is that all?"_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I felt like shit, I just wanted to get out of here. My stomach was cramping all over, and now I had to deal with this crap.

_"Is that all?"_ Teddy asked me. I thought about it, none of those houses ever meant anything to me. The money didn't either. The family could have it, I didn't care.

_"Yes."_ And so it was final. Teddy was eyeing me seriously. I knew he was looking out for me.

_"Honey, you have to go tell the family."_ Teddy ordered gently. I nodded struggling to stand back up, I hadn't gotten any sleep, I couldn't eat anymore, and my family was fighting over everything. Paul handed the baby to Teddy.

_"I'll go with her."_ He said quietly. Theodore nodded taking the baby and sat back down at his desk.

I was surprised at his actions, Paul caught up to me grasping my hand and giving it a little squeeze. The pair of us walked back out to the boardroom where all hell was breaking loose.  
Once they spotted me it got even worse,

_"Tell him, Rachael, your father didn't even like him!"_ My Aunt shouted eyeing my cousin,

_"Just fuck off, Bernie."_ Another one yelled. Paul and I stood at the head of the table people were too busy screaming at each other to even notice. I watched the madness unfold for a few minutes more, Paul was staring at me with a fearful look.

Paul's P.O.V.

These people were fucking crazy. They didn't even stop arguing when he and Rachael stepped into the room. Some of them were lunging at each other from across the tables, others were shouting at each other in both Greek and English, Paul couldn't understand. He watched as Rachael put her fingers to her lips and let out a nearly deafening whistle. Immediately everyone was silent; their necks snapping to her attention.

_"Enough."_ She stated coldly, a few raised their eyebrows. "_Everyone sit down."_ She ordered. A few got down quickly, others were being defiant and stood a few seconds more to show their opposition. At once everyone was seated, he and Rachael were the only ones standing,

_"Stop the arguing. I'm sick of it. We've been here for the last 24 hours and all we've done is fight the entire time."_ Some looked guilty others even refused to look at her. _"Now. I want to solve this peacefully, okay?"_ Most all of them nodded,

_"I already took what I wanted. The only thing left is the company and most of the houses._" One gentleman stood up,

"I'll take the company." He stated. Rachael looked around for any opposition, no one said a peep.

_"Fine, Constantine. It's yours."_ Paul watched as she went through each of their requests, she was in charge and everyone knew it. Paul saw her stomach constrict a few times, she looked like she was going to pass out. More than once he saw her leg go weak, he almost undetectably slunk an arm around her waist to support her. The people in the room were too busy to even notice him, they were hanging on every word she said. The beak nosed woman, Alexandra, stood back up.

_"Why does Constantine get the company? I want it."_ Within a second everyone was back on their feet shouting at each other. Paul could sense she was in the instigator… there was one in every family. He felt Rachael go rigid, he glanced at her, she was done. She looked over at him, there were tears in her eyes. Paul immediately took action escorting her out of the room and into the first hallway where no one could hear them. Once inside Paul held her tight burying her head beneath his chin,

_"It's alright."_ He cajoled. She wasn't moving, she didn't speak, she didn't even cry. After a minute or two of silence he pulled away a little bit to look down at her. She was staring straight ahead unfazed.

_"Why don't we go and get Holly so we can get back upstairs?"_ He questioned. She didn't say anything. He guided her back past the conference room with was still up in arms and into Teddy's office. Teddy glanced up from Holly's sleeping form taking a good hard look at Rachael and then to Paul.

_"I'll take the baby back up to your room. You two settle here for a while."_ Paul nodded as the old man stood up taking Holly and leaving the office. He took Rachael over to the couch and pulled her onto his lap, she didn't weigh anything anymore. Frankly, this scared the shit out of him, he placed a hand on her stomach. The bump had grown slightly larger, but her stomach was pulling in and out like crazy. He pulled her closer,

_"We'll be okay. Don't you worry."_ He mumbled, Rachael slouched against him, he stroked her hair. About half an hour passed when Teddy reappeared.

_"I left the baby with the nanny and I made the rest of the family go back upstairs."_ He informed them. Teddy looked at Rachael sadly. He came over leaning to give her a kiss on the cheek. He stood back up clapping Paul on the shoulder, _**'Take good care of her.'**_ He mouthed, walking back out the door.

Paul sat up a little looking at his watch, it was about 2 o'clock.

_"Why don't we go upstairs?"_ She didn't say anything, Paul remembered his conversation with Lucy, _"Wait, have you eaten dinner yet?"_ He bounced his legs a little to get her attention and she shook her head.

_"Why?"_ He whispered. It took her all of five minutes but she simply shrugged lightly before staggering to her feet,

_"Just tired, that's all."_ Paul knew she was lying but decided not to press it, even though she was sick- she wouldn't admit. He got up and gently placed an arm around her waist to basically support her. When they got up to the room all was silent. They both went and checked on the children. Holly was in a hotel crib, Lily and Will were still sharing a bed.

Rachael went to take a shower and he got up to order room service. Before she was even out he had food brought into their room. He was patiently waiting on the bed watching the telly when she walked out with a towel wrapped around her figure. She looked too exhausted to even acknowledge him. Paul studied her as she passed by to get to the closet. He spotted the gash mark form two nights prior- it honestly didn't look as bad as it had before. He must've overreacted with the whole 'stitches' thing. He was worried though, she was getting too damn skinny. She went back into the bathroom and when she came back out she was in her oversized t-shirt looking exhausted. Rachael crawled under the covers and stared at the T.V. He grabbed a plate from the nightstand and handed it to her she glanced down at it and shook her head.

_"Just a quick bite 'sall, love."_ He tried to persuade. She didn't even look at him.

_"Please?"_ He attempted. Rachael looked at him and back at the telly. Paul waited in silence, before he knew it he saw a tear run down her cheek, he quickly put the plate back on the stand and scooted closer to her,

_"What're the tears for?"_ He queried calmly. Inside he was expecting the worst,

_"I can't."_ She said almost inaudibly. He pushed the hair out of her face and put an arm around her,

"Why's that, love?" Paul moved his down her arm and on to her stomach. She instantly flinched and jumped, Paul's heart rate stared to quicken, he quickly sat up,

_"Don't move."_ He ordered, he gently pulled up the t-shirt over the bump.

The bruise was back.


	35. Chapter 35

Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't want him to see that the bruise was back, but I was in too much pain to protest. I couldn't eat anymore; I would get violently sick after… I basically gave up.

_"Don't move."_ Paul ordered, he gently pulled up the t-shirt over my little bump. He then took a sharp intake of breath staring at it for a while, I had to admit- it looked a lot worse than last time. He stood up and picked me up bringing me into the bathroom and placing me on the counter. He pulled up my shirt again,

_"Wow."_ He breathed out, I avoided his eyes. He put his fingertips to it pushing down just lightly; I bit my lip trying not to cry out. _"So… when did it come back?"_ Paul murmured,

_"Three days ago."_ It came back a little before the charity event. Over the past two days it rapidly got larger, I was pretty sure I had broken my rib again. Eating was torture, sleeping was impossible, and at times even breathing was too hard. I didn't want to tell Paul because there wasn't a lot he could do, last time it happened the doctor couldn't even do an x-ray, and the pain medication only lasted so long.

Paul was still staring at the bruise, he was at a loss for words, as was I. A clench of pain came and I bit down on my lip even further; the salty taste of blood touching my tongue.

Paul's P.O.V.

He didn't know what to do. He felt sick himself he was partially to blame for this- those were his children.

_"So yer not hungry?"_ He mumbled, she shook her head. He gulped finally looking up at her… she was worn-out, her face was pale, her eyes looked almost sunken in; he couldn't have looked much better- there wasn't much he could do at the moment, it was 2:30 and the rest of the world was sleeping. He picked her back up and brought her back to bed, pulling the covers tight around her while giving her a kiss on the cheek.

_"Gimme a mo, I'm taking a shower."_ He said quietly. He turned out the lamp leaving the T.V. on heading back towards the bathroom.

He hastily scrubbed of and threw on a pair of boxers before returning to bed, Rachael woke up when he crawled on,

_"Shhhh, just go back to sleep."_ He whispered she nodded and rolled back over, he flipped off the telly and the lamp settling himself in for the night, he reached over fumbling for her waist careful not to touch the bruise and effortlessly slid her over to put a protective arm around her waist.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I had a dream where someone was kicking me repeatedly in the stomach, I shook it off and woke up, Paul's arm was around my middle. I could feel him snoring softly against the back of my neck. Something was wrong though. Terribly wrong. I let out a whimper of pain. I felt Paul's grip tighten slightly and he woke up,

_"Summat wrong?"_ He mumbled. _"What's it? Is it one of the kids?"_ he asked, starting to get up.

_"It's,"_ I replied. The pain struck again, and I doubled over crying.

_"Jesus Christ, Rachael, what is it, is it th' baby?"_

I nodded, unable to speak.

Paul's P.O.V.

This wasn't good. This couldn't be good. He eased her back so she was lying down. She was breathing quick and shallow like,

_"What's going on?"_ He said now fully awake.

_"I'm Bleeding."_ She stated simply, Paul was in a mad panic now, he reached down for the covers and was surprised to find a rather large spill of blood spreading out from underneath Rachael.

_"How bad does it look?"_ She said quietly, her mouth was in a rigid line of pain,

_"Oh not to worry love, there 's barely any there. I'll call an ambulance though. Just to make sure."_ He lied, and she knew it. He reached over and nearly pulled the phone cord from the wall dialing 999.

An all too calm voice answered asking him to state his emergency,

_"It's Paul McCartney here-."_

_"Seriously? Like the Beatles, McCartney?"_ Paul went absolutely livid,

_"Yeah, that fucking McCartney. Listen, me girl Rachael 'ere is bleeding and she's pregnant we need an ambulance."_

_"Address?"_ Paul quickly gave the attendant the hotel's address and turned back to Rachael. She had her eyes closed and she looked decidedly grey.

_"Hey, love. Don't even worry 'bout it. They're coming straight away. Here, I'm going to go tell Lucy we're going. Okay?"_ She didn't respond. Paul scrambled out of bed throwing on his discarded pair of pants and dress shirt from earlier while sprinting to Lucy's room. He peeked his head in,

_"Lucy?"_ He whisper-shouted.

_"Mph?"_ Came her muffled response.

_"Rachael and I are going to the hospital, keep an eye and ear out for the kids, yeah?"_ Lucy shot up and ran over to him,

"_Is she okay?"_ Paul shook his head,

_"Just make sure the kids don't wake up, I don't want them to see this."_ Lucy walked out past him and into the kids room shutting the door.

Paul went back to the bedroom and got back into bed,

"_See it's all taken care of, love."_ He reassured squeezing her hand. She didn't even look like she was there any more, "_Hey, stay with me."_ He said shaking her a little. She didn't respond, Paul gathered her close and kissed her hair feverishly.

Thankfully he heard the door to the suite open and two men with a gurney came in, Paul waited until she was placed on it to inspect the damage, the sheets were absolutely soaked through with blood.

He kept next to the gurney the entire trip back to the ambulance, as soon as Rachael was on he attempted to climb in behind, a man stopped him though,

_"You can't ride with us."_ Said the attendant. Paul instantly shrugged his hand off and climbed in,

_"Shut yer mouth,"_ Paul snarled. _"Get out of my way. I'm coming and that's that."_ He climbed into the ambulance. The attendant swore and got in behind him. "_I hope I don't get fired for this,"_ he mumbled.

Paul instantaneously rounded in on him. "Listen you fuckin' medical school dropout," he shouted, grabbing the frightened attendant by the shoulder and shoving him roughly against the ambulance door. _"I couldn't care less about your job! I hope me fuckin' girl 'ere won't die, so I'm not too concerned about your little problem."_ He released the man, and knelt beside Rachael. _"Now,"_ he said stridently, "_See to her, and tell the driver to get on it."_

_"Paul, be nice."_ Rachael told him gently in a feeble, trembling voice. "_He's just doing his job."_ She laughed lightly using the same voice she scolded the children with. Paul's worry was lessened just a bit- she was still joking around.

_"Sorry, love,"_ he said, the attendant, who avoided his eyes and busied himself taking Rachael's blood pressure. He knelt beside her and took her hand in his, giving it a kiss. The ambulance pulled out into the street. The siren began to wail as they headed towards the hospital.

The ambulance attendant lifted the bloody sheet rolling Rachael onto her side cautiously. She winced in pain and Paul shot a warning look at the man. A clean towel was placed beneath her and the old, saturated one removed. The attendant then placed a needle in the back of Rachael's hand which started clear fluid going into her.

_"What's that?"_ Paul questioned in a taut voice, pointing at the needle.

_"Fluid drip."_ He reassured._ "Nothing to worry about, Mr. McCartney. We'll do all we can for her, as soon as we get her into hospital, we'll be able to get a clear idea of what's going on."_

Paul nodded, slightly calm that the man had it under control. He looked out the window at the dark streets flying by and then back at her. She had her eyes closed, he couldn't even think straight,

_"Is she asleep?"_ He asked the attendant. The man shook her shoulder a bit, she didn't respond. Paul tried as well,

_"Hey Rach, come 'ead it's not funny anymore wake up."_ He said flying into another panic. She didn't move.

_"Do something."_ Paul ordered looking up at the man who was just as panicked as he was. The man tried putting something under her nose, shaking her and calling her name. Nothing. He then put a finger to her wrist, then to neck.

_"Hey, Roger. Step on it."_ He called up front. Paul was absolutely taken aback,

_"What's wrong with her?"_ Paul ordered.

_"She's lost quite a bit of blood."_ The man informed him seriously while taking another machine and holding it to her chest. Paul sat back watching, he couldn't believe what was happening.

_"Pull her around."_ Not a second later the back of the ambulance was opened and a team of people pulled her down, Paul jumped down as well holding onto the side of the gurney, no one paid any mind to him though. They were all shouting in some medical language he didn't understand.

He managed to stay by her side until they reached the emergency room where a pair of older nurses blocked him from entering,

_"No admittance."_ A silver haired one said stealthily. He tried walking around her,

_"Just lemme the fuck in there."_ He shouted, immediately a pair of very large men appeared,

_"Sir, you're going to have to calm yourself, or you'll have to leave."_ Paul couldn't even see straight any more, anger completely blinded him,

_"I need to be in there!"_ He tried convincing the men through his frantic state, they calmly led him over to a pair of chairs and basically sat him down,

_"Sir, they're doing all they can for her. You need to stay here."_ Paul gave up fighting and collapsed in a heap. Completely defeated.


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: Hey guys! Review this, next chapter I really like. Oh and also thank-you so much for your previous reviews, they really help! Okay, read on! :)**

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Paul's P.O.V.

Not five minutes later the nurses left, and so did the large men. Paul looked quickly around… no one was watching. He nonchalantly stood up stuffing his hands in his pockets faking calm, he made a steady pace for the large metal doors and busted in breaking into a full on sprint down the corridor, he glanced through each glass window until at last he spotted Rachael. Doctors and nurses crowded around her bed side,

_"She's back."_ One of them proclaimed. A collective sigh of respite filled the room. Paul put a hand to his mouth almost crying out with relief

_"Fetal monitor."_ He ordered, Paul ducked down as they turned around trying not to be noticed. At last they filed out of the room and Paul stood back up with a sheepish scowl. The doctor noticed him and strode over,

_"She's alive, Mr. McCartney."_ Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What's going on?"_ He asked, glancing over the doctors' shoulder trying to get a better look into the room,

_"She's in somewhat stable condition."_ He said checking his clipboard. _"She's unconscious right now, she lost quite a bit of blood."_ Paul couldn't even see straight. He pushed past the doctors into the room pulling a chair over next to her bed. There was blood staining the sheets. Paul couldn't help but remember the last time he saw his mum. There was blood everywhere- Mike and him didn't know what was going on, no one would tell them. He felt as hopelessly lost then as he did now. The doctor followed him in continuing his spiel.

_"What about the babies?"_ He blurted out,

_"They're preparing the fetal monitors now. We'll know in a moment or so."_ He left the room, Paul turned his attention back to Rachael's sleeping form.

_"See Rach. It'll all be okay. You just have t' wake up for me, yeah?"_ He sniffled.

_"Come on, I know you're just joking. Yer gonna wake up and laugh at me 'nd call me a git for worrying so much, and I'll laugh too, right?"_ He kissed her again trying to wake her up, her lips were icy and unresponsive; feeling out of place beneath his,

_"And we'll go home, and we'll take care of the kids. And they'll be happy to see us."_ He kissed her again, his tears getting on her face, his heart was aching from sobbing,

_"And you'll get better, and we'll be better, and we'll be happy."_ He pulled her closer, _"And we'll be together, hell, we'll get a house together. We'll fill it with lots of babies, right? Yeah, lots and lots of babies. Half of them can look like you 'nd the other half can look like me, right?"_ He was trying to convince himself,

_"You and I will be so happy. We'll argue about stupid things, and then we'll have a laugh over it. Just like we always do, yes?"_ She was stock-still; Paul pulled her even tighter, bawling now.

He finally had to let go when a nurse walked in taking a quick scan then pulling up Rachael's shirt she squirted some sort of liquid gel on her stomach and pressed a machine against it. Paul didn't even glance up at her, he was staring at Rachael's face willing her to wake up.

Thoughts raced through his head a mile a minute,** 'What if she didn't wake up?, She couldn't just leave him.'** His worry was laced with guilt, **'He should've brought her in earlier'**, then to the future, **'He didn't know if he could raise three children by himself',** then to the past,** 'The moment he met her in Germany, he couldn't keep his eyes off of her. He followed her fanatically like a puppy',** then to the what-if's, **'What if she woke up, and was too damaged to continue to live normally?'**

_"I see two fetal heartbeats."_ The nurse informed him; pulling him away from his thoughts. Another thing struck him like a jab to the side- where in the world had he heard that voice before? _"They're going to be okay."_ Paul finally glanced up at her completely shocked. This woman had to be in her forties; she was a dead ringer for his mum. He must've looked like a complete idiot sitting there with his mouth hanging open. The woman gave him a small smile and nodded,

_"They'll be okay. Just let it be."_ The woman left the room. He couldn't believe his own ears; the doctor came back in,

_"Right then, Mr. McCartney, we don't know exactly what's going on, we're going to let it waver for a bit, and see which way she goes."_ Paul nodded as the doctor left again, He crawled up onto the bed scooting her just a bit, careful not to mess with any of the wires. He pulled her close resting his forehead against hers,

_"Hear that? You just have t' wake up, that's all. Then we can get outta 'ere. Remember, Rach? Remember what I told you? We're gonna be so happy. You just wait and see. You know what? Once we fill that house with babies we're gonna watch them all grow up. And we're gonna get old together, and even then we'll still be together."_ He pushed the hair out of her eyes continuing to make promises to her.

_"You just wait. And Lily will grow up 'nd have her own family 'nd William will too. And Holly will stay little forever, because she's just too sweet to grow up, see? It's going t' be fantastic. And I'll pass away before you do, 'cause I can't live without you. And you'll pass away after me, a really old lady, just not here, not now."_ He begged, kissing her again,

_"Okay? You just have t' promise me that? I can't do this alone, please love."_ He didn't know what to do anymore, she wasn't responding to his pleas, he rocked her close continuing to make promises, sooner or later doctors came filtering back in checking monitors, giving him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, and leaving.

Eventually an orderly wheeled in a telephone for his use, he sat up a little straighter and attempted to regain a somewhat normal voice for the children. He called Lucy- the children had slept through the entire ordeal, they were playing with their cousins right now. He called Teddy- he had kept the incident quiet, and was still working on the legal stuff for Rachael. He called Mike- Paul told him what had happened, Mike was on his way up to see them. He finally put down the phone and turned back to her, she had regained a fairly normal color, and she was resting comfortably.

_"Okay Rach, darling. All you've got to do is wake up."_ He told her again, pulling her head so it was resting on his chest getting comfortable himself, _"That's all."_ He drifted off into sleep, he woke about an hour later rubbing his sticky crying eyes, he kissed her on the head and made it down the hall to the bathroom to clean himself up.

Mikes P.O.V.

He someway managed to get into the hospital, security was tighter than usual. He was led down the corridor by a nurse, who he was sure he recognized. He couldn't get a clear view of his face, but being near her made him feel much calmer. She left him outside of Rachael's door, Mike peeked in, Paul was nowhere to be found. He went over the last phone call he received in his head- Paul was frantic, his voice was hoarse and he was distressed. Apparently Rachael started bleeding and Paul was blaming himself, saying over and over that he should've taken her into the hospital sooner. Mike somehow managed to find out where they were and took the car upfrom Liverpool to the hospital.

Mike walked over to the side of Rachael's bed, she looked peaceful, and she was sleeping. He took a seat and reached for her hand, within a second she woke up. Her eyes were large and confused,

_"Oops sorry to wake you, lovely."_ She looked over at him and tilted her head to the side,

_"I'm in the hospital, right?"_ She said in a raspy voice. Mike nodded,

_"Yes, you gave our boy quite a scare. What happened?"_ She looked thoughtful for a moment,

_"Well we were in the hotel, and the last thing I remember was telling Paul I was bleeding…. That's all… I think?"_ She said quietly, her throat sounded sore. Mike smiled and patted her hand,

_"That's as far as I got with 'im. He was going barmy on the phone, how do ya feel?"_ She nodded touching her stomach, with a near frantic look on her face,

_"Fine… Uhm where's Paul?"_ Mike looked around, not a moment later Paul came in surveying the situation then sprinted over to the bed nearly tackling her,

_"Don't you ever scare me again like that!"_ He shouted, and started crying. Paul hopped up on the bed frantically kissing her all over her face, Rachael looked all the more confused. Mike chuckled,

_"Take it easy, lad. She's just as baffled as you are."_ Paul pulled away looking at her then pulled her back into a suffocating hug,

_"You're so fucking stupid, Rachael!"_ He was crying again, _"Don't ever do that again."_ Rachael still had that confused look upon her face, Mike managed to pry Paul off of her,

_"Right then lad, tell her what happened."_ Mike said taking charge of the situation. Paul was still crying like a fool, Mike patted him on the back urging him to spill the story,

_"You got really sick, 'nd you were bleeding. So we had t' call an ambulance and they brought us 'ere. And you wouldn't wake up, and I went crazy."_ He broke into another fit of sobs, and pulled her close,

_"Don't do that ever again, do you hear me?"_ At once Rachael laughed a little before placing a hand on her stomach,

_"What about-" _Paul cut her off,

_"They're fine, the nurse saw two heartbeats."_ She looked relieved; Mike patted him on the back and left the room to give them a moment of privacy.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I didn't remember much of what happened, I was still feeling nauseated and Paul was sobbing. He kept telling me how stupid I was and that I shouldn't ever do that again, I was relived though, the babies were okay, and they saw two heartbeats. I pulled back from Paul's viselike grip for a moment,

_"What about the older kids?"_ He rocked me back and forth,

_"Lucy has 'em. Oh my God,"_ He started chuckling like madman again, _"I thought I was going t' lose you!"_ He rubbed my back still giving me kisses on the cheek,

_"Why are you laughing?"_ I asked starting myself,

_"I dunno, I went fucking nuts. Wait…"_ He pulled back looking me over, _"You woke up for Mike, not me. What the hell, Rach?"_ Small smile appeared on his face,

_"Sorry…"_ I said giggling he pulled me back into the hug.

Paul's P.O.V.

Nothing else mattered anymore, she had woken up and everything was going to be okay. He and Mike left Rachael to a nurse to be cleaned up and the doctor was giving them instructions,

_"We're not out of the woods yet, you're going to have to keep a close eye on her, Mr. McCartney."_ Mike nudged him and he nodded,

_"She's also underweight… not horribly but she does need to start gaining it."_ He flipped the page, _"Anemic."_ He mumbled Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What's that mean?"_ The doctor scribbled something down,

_"It's from not eating. It can be changed though. She'll need a lot of red meats- things of those kinds. I'd advise you to keep her out of high stress situations for at least the next week."_ Paul thought back to the house, 3 energetic children, the press outside her gate, and never ending phone calls. _"She is going to be released tomorrow morning, you two can wait out here, they're still administering treatment."_ The doctor left and Mike nudged him again,

_"So what's the plan, lad?"_ Paul thought about it for a moment burying his hands in his pockets and looking around the hallway,

_"I don't know, I guess I'll take 'er home-"_ Mike cut him off,

_"Listen, what if Ang and I took the kids for the week, so you can get her to relax?"_ Paul bit the inside of his cheek, _"They can come back with me, and we'll stay at Da's house."_ The idea became more and more clear,

_"I could take her up to Scotland, maybe?"_ Paul thought aloud, _"I bought that farm up there a while back, 'aven't seen much of it."_ Mike clapped his shoulder,

_"There you go, kid."_ Paul and Mike quickly made plans, Paul was going to take the family back to London to pack and on the way up to Scotland, he and Rachael were going to drop the kids off in Liverpool for the week.

The two men waited patiently until the doctor's were done cleaning her up and administer medicine. When he went back into the room she had her eyes closed resting comfortably. A moment of worry passed over him as he sat down on her bed, thankfully she opened her eyes, he couldn't help but feel relieved.

_"'Ey pretty girl, how're you feeling?"_ He asked gently. She gave him a weak smile,

_"Alright."_ He gave her a smile gripping her hand tightly and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

_"How would you like to go to Scotland with me?"_

_"Scotland?"_ She asked raising an eyebrow.

_"Yeah. On the farm up there."_ She tilted her said to the side as if to ask; why, _"The doctor said that you 'ave t' take it easy fer a week… so going back to London probably isn't such a great idea."_

_"What about the kids?"_ Mike stood up from his perch next to the window,

_"Ang and I will take 'em fer the week."_ He said winking at her. Paul chuckled and waited for her response.

_"What about-"_ Paul cut her off,

_"All of us are goin' back home to pack. On the way up we're dropping the kids off in th' 'Pool and you and I are goin' t' Scotland, yes?"_ Mike left the room to give them a moment.

_"Does it have indoor plumbing?"_ She asked seriously. He could see a small smile pulling at the corners of her mouth; he knew she was teasing.

_"Yer a smartarse,"_ he chuckled. _"And yes it does, ma'am."_ She shrugged her shoulders leaning back,

_"Rachael Belter, I, Beatle Paul McCartney, am asking you to go with me to Scotland. Most girls would jump at the chance."_

_"I don't know,"_ She said softly, Paul didn't know what to think, "_Beatle Paul and I haven't been getting along lately."_ Paul sighed giving her a look over,

_"Beatle Paul has been having a rough time of it. He'd rather just be plain old Paul McCartney for a little while."_ She looked thoughtful,

_"Alright I guess, only if I get to go with Regular Paul not Beatle Paul."_ She grabbed his wrist and took a look at his watch, Paul chuckled; _"It's like 6:00, Why don't you go have dinner with the kids?"_ She asked, Paul felt a bit apprehensive, he didn't want to leave and have something bad happen. By now Mike was back in the room he put a hand on Paul's shoulder,

_"I'll take care of the brat."_ He said giving Rachael a smirk, Rachael flipped him the finger, Paul took one last look over her before grabbing his coat,

_"Alright, I'll be back soon. Take care of her Mike."_ He warned, Mike saluted him flipping on the telly before turning back to Rachael,

_"Shove over, lovely. Uncle Mike wants to lie down."_ Paul smiled as he left the room knowing she was in capable hands.


	37. Chapter 37

**A/N: Fluffy chapter, the next one will be better, review it!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

Dinner was a little rough. Lily and Will were crabby, Holly was content. So he let Lucy off for a while, he ordered room service setting up the kids at the dining table.

_"Daddy, where's mummy?"_ Lily asked picking at her chips on her plate. Paul was ripping up pieces of bread for Holly.

_"Mummy wasn't feeling good, but you'll get to see her tomorrow morning."_ He answered, Will was half asleep staring at his plate; apparently playing all day had worn him out.

_"I wanna go home."_ Will said still staring at his plate, Paul put Holly in the high chair the staff had brought up and started eating, himself.

_"I know buddy, I've got a surprise for you two though."_ Immediately both Lily and Will locked their attention on him.

_"Remember your Uncle Mike?"_ They both nodded smiling,

_"How would you like to spend the week with 'im?"_ They both started shrieking with excitement and high fiving each other, after they had calmed down Lily got serious again,

_"What about you 'nd mummy?"_ He couldn't get a thing past the five year old.

_"Mummy and I are going on a little trip."_ Lil nodded, he couldn't read the expression on her face,

_"Together?"_ He nodded raising an eyebrow, she smiled and whispered something to William who readily agreed,

_"Why?"_ He queried. The little girl looked sullen for a moment in her own thoughts,

_"'Cuz Willy and I thinked that maybe you guys could be a mummy 'nd daddy together again… maybe."_ Paul was slightly taken aback by the child's thoughts that seemed far beyond her years,

_"Oh."_ He said returning to his plate, _"Yeah… well…"_ He wasn't quite sure how he should respond. The two older children looked slightly embarrassed the way children do when they say something important. Paul put down his fork resting his chin in his palm,

"_Listen."_ He said finally finding the words, both Lily and William looked up at him, _"Yer Mum and I are working on it, okay?"_ The pair nodded. He was determined to make it work for their sake. And his.

Paul packed a small overnight bag for he and Rachael, Lucy returned to take care of the kids. Paul put them to sleep before he left,

When he returned to the hospital Rachael and Mike were sitting up looking at a magazine laughing. Paul walked in all smiles- he hadn't heard her laugh in ages. He scooted on the bed next to them and took a look down at the publication on her lap,

_"Whatcha reading, miss?"_ She was laughing too hard to answer, Paul peeked down and scanned over the page with a sudden smile forming on his lips, **MACCA'S MONSTERS.**

She pointed to a certain picture and started laughing even harder, this one was taken when they were all in Greece. Lily and William were throwing sand at each other, he and Rachael were in the background with horrified faces on running towards the kids to break them up. Another one caught his eye, a naked Lily and William in the rain throwing mud at a reporter. He was hysterically laughing- that was the day they had started talking again. A half-asleep Mike stood up chuckling giving Rachael a peck on the cheek and Paul a pat on the back,

_"See you lot tomorrow,"_ He said, _"Oh, and Rach- Listen to my boy 'ere. He's in charge."_ Mike chided, Rachael laughed and then Mike left with a wave. Paul watched her finish the reading with a smile on his own face,

_"'Ear that, love? I'm in charge."_ She scoffed,

_"You wish, McCartney."_ He chuckled taking off his shoes getting comfortable next to her- he didn't give a shit if it was against hospital protocol. He shut off the lights and they both turned their attention to the T.V. She was picking at the IV they put in her arm. Paul absentmindedly took her hand away from the needle, giving it a kiss,

**_'Beatle John Lennon and Artist Yoko Ono have released their new Album entitled Two Virgins.'_** Paul's mood immediately dropped. He glanced over at Rachael who was staring at the screen, a moment later the album cover was shown and her mouth dropped open,

_"What?"_ She said quietly. Paul nodded and scoffed, _"They're not seriously using that, are they?"_ She said looking over at him, He nodded.

She began to giggle. _"You've got to be kidding me. You can't have an album cover with nude people on the front of it. And Two Virgins? You're joking, right?"_

But his face was still very serious. _"I'm not kidding you. John wants the world to see him and Yoko as they truly are."_ She was still laughing, she looked back at the screen,

_"You wouldn't pose nude with me on an album cover would you?"_ He said dropping his previous mood, and chuckling.

_"No way! Would you?"_ She said laughing hysterically.

_"Hell, no! I'm not having my junk hangin' out fer the rest of the world to see. Too many people are prying into our private lives as it is, We don't need to have someone analyzing my prick under a magnifying glass."_ She snorted and brought a hand up to her mouth trying to fight back the laughter, he smiled,

_"Besides, yer tits are way better looking than Yoko's."_ He saw the tears rolling down her cheeks from laughing so hard.

Hours later they had finally calmed down enough to resume watching T.V. like mature adults, he couldn't help but feel overjoyed; this was the first time in a really long time that they were together without anything horrid looming over them. It was around 2 in the morning when he glanced down his nose at her, her face was highlighted by the glow of the T.V. screen, she looked to be half asleep. He couldn't help it any longer, he brought his arms even tighter around her and kissed along her jaw line.

_"Are you tired?"_ He murmured, she woke up and nodded, turning towards him. He locked eyes with her; _did she want this?_

He cautiously leaned his forehead against hers, he almost shook from anxiousness, he felt his heart pounding. He studied her face intensely her pink, soft lips, her insanely dark eyes and her flawless skin, it was the way she looked at him- he could never tell exactly what she was thinking- it drove him insane.

He leaned forward pressing his lips against hers, every single nerve ending in his body sparking off, it took her a second but she started kissing back. A moment or so later he pulled back, breathing shallowly as a small smile tried on his lips.

_"Ya still tired?"_ He asked chuckling. She laughed lightly still staring at him, he pulled back in nibbleingher bottom lip, not a moment later they heard a cough and the door swung open; both he and Rachael jumped away from each other she let out a small yelp and he busted out laughing, a doctor walked in with a clipboard not even noticing he was in the bed with her.

_"Ah good, Miss. Belter, you're still up."_ She laughed a little nudging Paul guiltily, he found her embarrassment beyond entertaining. _"It looks as though we are going to discharge you this morning." She nodded sitting up a little straighter, "But there are some final instructions."_ Paul sat up as well listening to the doctor,

_"You did break your rib again, that is obviously certain. It'll heal soon, we're going to give you some medication that will help you ease up on the sickness; the downside is that you're going to get pretty tired from it. So you'll have to plan on sleeping a lot."_ Paul looked back at her, the one thing he figured out about her was that doctors made her nervous; he reached out for her knee giving it a squeeze, "_You're anemic. That means you'll have to eat a lot of red meat- things of those kinds, and you'll need to start gaining weight."_ She nodded, Paul got out of the bed waiting until the doctor was done checking her monitors, he followed him out into the hallway,

_"'Ey doc,"_ He said to the man grabbing his attention,_ "Is there anything else?"_ He asked,

_"Well, all I can tell you is that you need to keep a close eye on her. I've noticed she doesn't really complain too much about pain… so just basically you're in charge of her. Make sure that she's feeling well, all of that."_ Paul nodded and returned to the room, her eyes were closed and she looked to be asleep,

_"Rach?"_ He whispered, she opened one eye,_ "Shove over."_ She slid over to the other side of the bed making room for him, he crawled in nestling up against her back, they still had a few hours to sleep off.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Medication was my best friend. Whatever they put in that IV had the pain numbed and I was in a cheerful mood. When I woke up, Paul was snoring in my ear. I poked him in the side, he opened one eye and eyed me,

_"You snore like an old man."_ I mumbled still half-asleep, he groaned and buried his face in my neck.

_"Go back to sleep."_ He mumbled I turned towards him grabbing his wrist and taking a look at his watch,

_"Wake up. We get to leave in half an hour."_ He groaned again, rolling off the bed and onto the chair beside the bed. He rubbed his eyes resting his head in his palms giving me a small smile. The doctor came in not 5 minutes later and Paul left to call a car. I changed quickly grabbing the overnight bag and meeting Paul halfway down the hallway.

When we got back to the hotel we were met by quite a few reporters,

_"Took 'em fucking long enough t' find us."_ Paul chuckled as we briskly rushed past them. Lucy had the three children packed, they were still sleeping. Teddy was waiting for us when we got to the room,

_"Hey, honey."_ He said squeezing me tightly. Paul followed us into the bedroom whilst I packed up the remainder of my items,

_"I got everything figured out for you, the rest of the family went home."_ I nodded happily, I was still a bit worn out.

_"There's one last thing though."_ He said pulling out papers from his briefcase. I took them and scanned them over; they completely inked, honestly I didn't have the energy to read them,

_"What's this?"_ I said raising an eyebrow, he coughed,

_"Ah well, it's about the children's last names. I figured that they should probably all be the same… you know make things easier to remember."_ I thought about it for a moment,

_"Alright, so just change them all to Belter… I don't see what the problem is."_ Paul came over taking the documents from my hands and glancing up at Teddy sharing a knowing look.

_"What?"_ I questioned, they both obviously knew something I didn't,

_"Rachael…"_ Paul said quietly, Teddy left the room._ "Well, I was wondering if Lily could… well if she could take on my last name."_ I thought about it for a moment,

_"I don't know."_ I said quietly. Paul didn't say anything he continued looking over the papers, he glanced up at me letting out a sigh, _"We'll talk about it later, yes?"_ I nodded,_ "Right then finish packing, I'll put these away."_ He gave me a peck on the cheek and walked out to the common room. I was a little perturbed, that seemed to have had come out of nowhere. I put it out of my mind though and finished packing.

When I came back out to the front room Lily and Will were cuddling on the couch, and a very sleepy Holly was snuggling up to Paul.

**'Ready?'** Paul mouthed, I nodded. He stood up handing me Holly and went to pick up Lily and Will. We waited until the bellhop picked up our bags; and then we were off.

The press were a little obnoxious outside the door, when the car pulled up most of them continued to berate the door, the driver had to pull them off, and we were finally on our way.

Paul's P.O.V.

About 10 minutes into the trip Lily, Will, and Rachael were out. He sprawled out on his seat with Holly on his chest, the baby was sleepily smiling at him struggling to keep her eyes open. He pulled his coat up around her and buttoned it so it fashioned into sort of a cocoon. He chuckled a little bit,

_"I should've brought you on tour with me, Hol's."_ He whispered, "_You're like a heater."_ He chuckled remembering how cold it got in the early days of Hamburg.

_"Guess what else?"_ He whispered to the baby, she had her chin on his chest looking up at him, _"I got yer mum to kiss me!"_ He gave Holly a loud smooch on the cheek, the baby smiled again, now dozing off, _"Things are going great Hol's."_ And he hoped that they would stay this way.


	38. Chapter 38

**A/N: It's been a while since I've updated, sorry! I got mono (I know eww!) but I'm back!**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

The next time I woke up, the car was pulling into my drive. I put my hand on the window making it cold, then stuck it on Paul's forehead, he instantly woke flinching from the cold,

_"Christ, whaddya want?"_ I laughed a little,

_"We're back."_ He sat up, I noticed Holly bundled up in his coat,

_"Oh, mmk."_ He pulled her out handing her to me and grabbed Lily and Will. The five of us went inside. He put the older two on the couch and returned outside to grab bags that the driver was pulling out. He came back in with a smile on his face reaching out for Holly,

"_Give 'er. It's fuckin' cold."_ I handed her over and she returned to the spot in Paul's jacket.

_"How long will it take you to pack?"_ He said rubbing his eyes,

_"I don't know. What do I need?"_

_"Clothes."_

I rolled my eyes. _"Thank you so much, Mr. McCartney, for that incredible insight."_

_"You don't want to bring clothes?"_ he asked innocently with a smirk. _"I'm all for seeing you naked."_

I ignored the previous comment and led him upstairs, _"What kind of clothes do I need to bring?"_ I asked, trying to get the conversation back on track.

_"Warm. Really warm. It's way colder and it's snowing harder than it is here."_ I grabbed another small suitcase- I was getting pretty used to living out of one. I swear, it was like we were never home anymore. I threw every warm thing I owned into a pile then began folding it all, Paul sat next to me- Holly still in his coat, and helped put things neatly inside.

Paul's P.O.V.

She was one hell of a packer- he hated doing it himself. She walked out of the closet for a moment to go pack up something else, and he spotted her nightshirts. He chuckled a little and pulled them out hiding them behind a rack of clothes- he remembered in Liverpool when she wore his dress shirts to bed- they were crazy sexy, he planned to pack extra ones and when she couldn't find her own he would nonchalantly suggest she should borrow one.

She finished packing, they packed effortlessly for each of the children and they were off to his house. It would've been loads easier if they all lived together… he was working on that. Martha was more than pleased to see Lillian and Will again, she had a bit of an attitude towards him- he didn't blame her though, he hadn't been around all too often lately. He packed for himself, grabbed a guitar, some food for Martha; that was until he heard a shriek from downstairs. He threw down his luggage and sprinted the rest of the way,

_"What's that matter?"_ He said trying to find his way to the source of the shrieks. He nearly died from laughter when he made it to the kitchen. Rachael was standing on a chair looking out into the living room,

_"What was that!?"_ She squealed. Paul waited a moment and saw a flash of fur streak down the hallway, he nearly broke down laughing,

_"Rach, it's a cat."_ She looked at him completely dumbfounded, he walked over to the chair lifting her off by the hips and setting her on the floor. She just looked shocked, it took her a minute before she realized what had just happened and she broke out into a huge smile giggling. She swatted him on the chest,

_"You didn't tell me you had a cat, you asshole!"_ He pecked her on the cheek and returned upstairs to drag all of his stuff out to the car.

_"How do you expect to fit a giant dog and two small children in the back?"_ Rachael called out from the doorway. He chuckled and whistled for the dog who bounded to his side, then carried the still sleeping William and Lil to the car. He put each of them in buckling them up, then had Martha lay across them both, Only William woke up a tad bit, readjusting himself to get comfortable,

_"You're really tubby, Martha."_ He said quietly. Paul chuckled and looked back at Rachael who rolled her eyes and smiled.

Before he knew it they were off towards Liverpool. Rachael took the meds the doctor gave her and she was out like a light. The older kids were content with the huge dog on their lap, and he was more than delighted to have them all in one place at a time for once.

He was surprised at how quickly they had managed to make it to Liverpool. The usual 4 hour drive was a tidy 2 and a half hour one, it was around noon when they made it. The snow was much deeper here than in London. When he pulled up to the house he spotted Mike playing in the snow with Ruth out in the front yard. He waved them down and pulled up to the curb. Both Lily and Will were deep asleep, Mike came around freeing Martha and pulling the two older kids out taking them into the house while he shook Rachael's shoulder.

_"Wake up, darling."_ Paul said scooting closer to her. She scrunched her face up and opened her eyes looking at him with a small smile,

_"That was quick."_ He nodded reaching for Holly from her lap. He put the sleeping baby inside his coat making sure she stayed warm, Rachael took a minute to wake up and flash him another smile before getting out and practically running up to the house to avoid the snow and cold. Paul let out a chuckle and went straight after her.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Paul went into the kitchen to talk with his dad and stepmother while I fixed my makeup in the hallway mirror. Mike waltzed in from the living room with a smile,

_"'Ello Lovely, you still tired?"_ I nodded a little while he pulled me into a hug. That was until he let out a little whistle. _"You've lost quite a bit of weight."_

_"Just a little."_ I insisted, I knew I had lost a few pounds, mainly from being sick- I guess it's harder to tell when you're the one losing it.

Mike reached out and put his hand under my chin, tilting my face up to his. _"And I can see it in your face,"_ he said gently. _"Cor, he did a job on you, our boy. You're feeling better, yeah?"_

_"Yep, thanks for taking care of the kids for the week."_ He smiled leaning back against the wall,

_"No problem. So you two are headed straight up to Scotland then?"_ I nodded,_ "A whole seven days alone with our boy? Whatever will you do to pass the time?"_

_"Sleep."_ He chuckled loudly while winking at me,

_"Is that what you kids call it nowadays?"_

Paul's P.O.V.

He was talking to Angie and his father, both whom seemed excited to be having the kids around or the week. He was about to step back into the hallway when his father called him back,

_"Paul."_ He said. The tone was serious and reserved. He couldn't help but remember that tone from when he was a child and had done something wrong, he turned around raising an eyebrow. His father was holding the phone out for him.

_"Who's it?"_ He asked, Jim didn't say anything. He stood there looking stoic still holding out the phone. His eyebrows furrowed together as he reached for the receiver holding it to his ear,

_"'Lo?"_

_"It's Alistair."_ Came the reply,

_"What's the matter?"_

_"Dot Rhone's the matter."_ Paul's stomach instantly dropped,

_"Whaddya mean?"_ He asked hurriedly, he could still hear Rachael and Mike laughing in the hallway.

_"She sold it. She sold her story."_ Paul's mind went blank,

_"What story?"_ He asked stupidly. He knew perfectly well 'what story'.

_"Everything. It's all out now."_ He leaned back against the kitchen wall feeling sick. His father and Angie had left the room giving him privacy.

_"What do I do?"_ He was frightened.

_"We have a lawyer on it. There's not much we can do. She told the truth, she didn't lie."_ His mouth was dry- he was just a stupid kid. **An insanely stupid, uncaring, cold, selfish bastard of a kid.**


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: Review it!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

It was 1959, he was young just starting off in Hamburg, and he had gotten her pregnant. She was only 16, he was only 17. He took the responsibility and they decided to get married. But… things happened, Dot ended up losing the baby. He- well he was just stupid, and uncaring. Too full of ambition and too young to be tied down to just one person. So he ended it. He ended it because she lost the baby and he didn't feel obligated anymore. He was a right bastard.

He thought to his situation now and felt sick. There was a difference this time around- he wanted Rachael. He wanted those kids. He wanted their children. He wanted to make a life together. He was a completely different person now, before- he was just a dumbass kid, now- he was the same stupid kid, but he wanted it this time.

**How was he going to tell her?**

_"Paul?"_ Alistair called again bringing him back to reality,

_"I'm here._" He said mechanically ,

_"I'd advise you to tell your.. your-"_ Paul noted the pause,_ "I'd advise you to tell Rachael. And warn your family. It'll be all over the papers by tomorrow."_

_"How bad do you think the press will be?"_ He asked quietly making sure no one else could hear him.

_"No worse than the 'secret family' scandal. Neil and I are trying to pay her off."_ Paul rubbed his now aching forehead. 'Shit' he muttered.

_"Alright. I'm going up to Scotland with her. The kids are staying with the family in Liverpool. Do you think th' press 'll find out?"_

_"No. As long as you don't attract attention. I'll call later."_ Alistair hung up and Paul slammed the phone back on the cradle.

**How could he be so fucking daft?**

If he told her.

She would leave.

If he didn't and she found out.

She would leave.

What to do?

He was going to play it selfish. Things were going too good now to mess up. He wanted her so bad it hurt, at least this week with her could last him a lifetime. He knew it, after he told her she would be gone. And honestly this time- he didn't blame her.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Paul came back out of the kitchen with a small smile on his face,

_"Ready?"_ He asked. I nodded and went over to say goodbye to the children. Neither William nor Lily woke up fully, they just muttered goodbyes while I gave them kisses. Holly was still in her ever-present content mood. I gave her a kiss and a squeeze handing her off to Paul. I then turned to Mike giving him final last minute instructions.

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul turned away from Mike and Rachael's discussion. He looked down at the baby she had just handed him. It was his kid. He knew it. _"I'm so sorry Hol's."_ He whispered, _"I was stupid. Don't forget me okay? You're always going t' be my little baby, alright?"_ The child listened quietly still having no idea what he was saying, she must've sensed he wasn't in the most cheerful mood because she plopped her head against his chest, while he gave her another kiss willing himself not to cry. _"I don't know what's going to happen, but you'll always be mine, okay?"_ He gave her another kiss never wanting to let go, then went over to the couch where the two older children were. He thought about how tough it was when he and Rachael wouldn't speak for that entire month. The pair were bounced back and forth between them. He would surely see them again, he was Lillian's father- and she wouldn't go anywhere without William. So he'd get to see them. He doubted he'd get to see Holly though. During the month that he and Rachael weren't speaking he only caught the occasional glimpse of her peeking through the front door from the living room, or sleeping in Rachael's arms.

**How could he have been so stupid?**

Mikes' laughter brought him back to reality. He plastered a smile across his face. He was going to be selfish, if only for this week.

He let Rachael and Mike finish their conversation, and Rachael went to go put Martha back into the car, he was thankful she was diverted- he had to tell his Dad and Mike.

_"What's the matter, lad? You look a bit green about th' gills."_ Mike said looking at him, he was distracted looking out the window at Rachael. She had a smile on petting the dog and trying to coax her back into the car.

**How could he have been so cruel?**

_"I have something to tell you. Go get Da."_ He said solemnly, Mike raised an eyebrow but noted the urgency in his tone and went off to retrieve his father.

It only took a minute for Jim and Mike to come back to the room. Both men looked serious. He had to tell them. He looked down at Holly in his arms, the baby was playing with his watch, and kicking her tiny feet.

**So innocently.**

_"Do you remember Dorothy Rhone?"_ He asked turning back to his father and brother. Both whom nodded. Paul looked back at his sleeping daughter and her best friend, whom he considered his own son.

**He was a bastard.**

_"She sold her story to the press."_ He waited a moment to look back at his family. His father's face was stone. He was the one that told Paul to marry her. Mike looked at him in disbelief. So much for being an older brother he could look up to.

_"Da…_" He said quietly making sure the kids were still sleeping, _"Rachael's pregnant."_ His father looked unmoved. Mike- who already knew, looked irate, and disappointed to say the absolute least.

Jim got up reaching out for Holly. Paul reluctantly gave her a final kiss and handed her over. Jim left the room, it was only him, Mike, and the sleeping older children. Mike was just studying him with a disgusted look on his face, he finally broke the silence.

_"Does Rachael know?"_ Paul shook his head slowly, Mike scoffed._ "I can't fuckin' believe this."_ Mike muttered. He could believe this either.

_"So yer gonna tell her, yes?"_ Mike asked. Paul nodded._ "Jesus Christ."_ He muttered again. Both men were looking at the children, Mike finally patted him on the back letting out a sigh,

_"Good luck._" He said half-heartedly. Paul turned to leave but Mike put a hand on his shoulder.

_"Be good to her, lad. She doesn't deserve this."_ Mike was right. She didn't.


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: I let my cousin write this one.**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

Paul, Martha, and I left and were on our way. Paul pulled away from the curb with a menacing laugh,

_"You're mine fer the week, I'm in charge."_ He said wiggling his eyebrows. I laughed a little pulling my coat tighter around myself, I was freezing!

"_Who told you that?"_ I said. He shrugged looking at me out of the corner of his eye with a confident smirk,

"_I did."_ I nodded and yawned, this medicine was wearing me out.

Paul's P.O.V.

The medicine was really kicking the shit out of her. He kept one hand on the steering wheel and reached out an arm to pull her close, she leaned against him and promptly fell asleep. He had everything on his mind at once- he had to tell her. But, he didn't want her to leave. His wandering mind got the best of him, and before he knew it his hand was wandering too he reached under her coat and felt up along her side until he came into contact with her ribs, which he could still feel.

**How could he have caused so much pain?**

_"You're too thin, baby doll."_ He whispered moving his arm slightly to rouse her.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"I'm fine,"_ I replied, slightly irritated from the fact that he woke me up and slightly irritated from the fact that he wouldn't let it go. He rubbed his thumb over my ribs, again.

_"You're sick."_ He insisted further, never once taking his eyes off the road.

_"I'll get better."_ I said quietly. Paul continued to rub my ribs over and over. It would've been okay if he wasn't doing it because it upset him.

_"Do you promise?"_ He asked quietly. I nodded falling back asleep. _"I'll hold you t' that then."_

Paul's P.O.V.

She was down and out for the count. He made quick work of driving, she only half woke up when he pulled into a grocers parking lot,

_"I'll be back in a mo."_ He whispered. She nodded, he got out quickly and locked the doors before running in and grabbing a few last minute groceries.

When he returned she was leaning against the window sleeping again. He unlocked his door and scooted in to avoid the cold,

"_Hope you can cook."_ He said looking over at her with amusement as she sleepily rubbed her eyes,

_"Hope you like sandwiches."_ He chuckled as she took the brown paper bag from him and took a look poking around,

"_Seriously?"_ She said not finding any fixings for sarnies, only a package of red meat and various other assortments.

_"Seriously. Th' doctor said yer anemic. You have t' eat that."_ She poked at it through the plastic wrap.

_"Do you know how it cook it?"_ She said looking up at him, he shook his head suddenly realizing that he had no idea how to cook- and the fact that they were far away from his housekeeper and all of their favorite restaurants.

_"Neither do I."_ He busted out laughing realizing how unskilled in the kitchen they both were.

_"So what can you cook, Miss Rachael?"_ She shook her head,

_"Sandwiches. That's it."_ He chuckled pulling out of the lot, she was insanely cute with all her quirks.

The thought hit him again, how much of an idiot could he be? She was going to leave. How come everything had to play out like this? He was losing everybody. He lost John to Yoko. He was steadily losing George due to disagreements, Ringo was the same- it was like they were on the same team but being pulled in two different directions. His younger brother Mike- God, how he couldn't forget the disgusted look he gave him when he left. Now Rachael. The only thing he truly wanted, he was going to hurt her, and she didn't even know it.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"Hey, Rach?"_ Paul spoke after a moment; of relaxed silence.

_"Yeah?"_

_"This is going to sound stupid, I'm sure,"_ he chuckled softly.

I rolled my eyes with a smirk on my face, _"You always sound stupid, let's hear it."_

He shook his head with a smile, _"I don't want t' lose anymore of me best friends."_ I didn't understand what he was trying to get at, _"So,"_ he continued, placing his hand back on my stomach, _"Don't go anywhere."_ I tilted my head to the side and looked at him, where was this coming from?

He wasn't looking for an answer, he didn't need one. I looked back out towards the window,

_"How much longer?"_ He glanced down at his watch then back up at the road,

_"'Bout an hour."_ I groaned and leaned my head back against the seat, he chuckled,

_"Martha and I are bored."_ He looked at me laughing,

_"Do you want to drive, I can assure you it's loads of fun."_ I shook my head,

_"I'm a shitty driver."_ He glanced over at me,

_"Surely you can't be that bad."_ I shook my head,

_"I'm horrible, I literally feel bad for other people on the road when I'm driving."_ He smiled,

_"So you can't cook, and you can't drive."_ He sighed, _"What in the world am I going t' do with you?"_ I shrugged, suddenly feeling tired again- this medicine sucked.

_"I don't know. I'm tired."_ He reached out an arm again puling me to his side,

_"Go to sleep then."_ I nodded, for once not arguing and promptly fell asleep.

Paul's P.O.V.

He pulled up as promised an hour later to the house and cut the engine. He reached around in back and let Martha out the door. The dog hopped out and walked away- already somewhat familiar with this land. He turned his attentions back over to Rachael, God, she was attractive. He felt bad waking her up, she was adorable when she slept.

_"Hey, love, we're here."_ It only took her a second to come to and wake up, she pulled her coat around herself even tighter and gave him a small smirk,

_"It's cold."_ He nodded.

_"I know."_ They both got out of the car she trudged to the door through the snow doing a little 'I'm cold' dance while he got their bags, and his guitar out of the boot. He got up to the door, and made a show of pretending to forget the keys before he opened it with a smirk. She ran in and he heard her laughing,

_"Where's all the furniture?"_ She giggled.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I looked around the dimly lit room only to discover a small kitchen with nothing more than an icebox, small stove, and counter, and a tiny living room only consisting of a couch and an ancient fireplace that looked like it hadn't been used in the last decade.

_"Are you making fun of me hideaway, Miss?"_ He said chuckling while following me inside. I nodded,

_"It's like… empty_!" He chuckled putting down the bags and running out a final time for groceries and Martha's food.

I looked around some more, the bathroom consisted of an oversized bathtub, a toilet, a sink with an old mirror hanging over it and a undersized hot water heater that took up a corner of the room. Then off to the bedroom which was no more than an old mattress on the floor with a short ratty table next to it acting as a bedside table.

Mike's P.O.V.

He had managed to get all the kids to bed, it certainly wasn't that hard! He bundled the older two up in snow suits shortly after Paul and Rachael left, and let them out to play in the snow with Ruth. He didn't see much of Holly all day, after Paul had broken the 'news' to their father, Jim had taken the baby and left to his own study. His wife, Ang, had been working all day, she had to spend the night in Bristol. He sat back on the couch having a moment to himself to think, how could his older brother have been such an idiot?

He sighed, Rachael certainly didn't deserve to have to deal with this, he didn't know how things were going to play out between them. He got up running hands through his hair and walked upstairs to check on the kids. Holly was sleeping soundly in the guest room, and the older two were situated in Ruth's room. He peeked inside squinting in the darkness to see the outline of Ruth; sleeping, William; sleeping, and surprised to find Lillian, with her face highlighted by the streetlight from the window, wide awake. The little girl looked to be tugging at her ear with one hand and sucking the others thumb. My God, she looked exactly like Paul. He couldn't see even a slight trace of Rachael in the girls' features. He watched her a moment before whispering into the darkness,

_"Pssst,"_ He hissed, Lily looked back at him, he saw a lone tear sliding down the girls cheek. He swiftly walked in and picked her up careful not to wake the sleeping other two and took her out of the room and into the living room. When he finally got there she certainly looked upset; but she wasn't making a sound. Just silent tears escaping down her cheeks.

_"What's th' matter, pretty?"_ He asked cuddling the little girl, she shrugged slightly tugging at her ears some more and leaning into his shoulder. Mike rubbed her back slightly, _"It has t' be something."_ He insisted quietly. The five year old sighed and leaned back to study his face. **How many times had Paul looked like that at him?** She removed the thumb from her mouth and rubbed the side of her nose. **How many times had Paul made that gesture?**

"_I'll keep a secret, lass. Can ya tell me why you're cryin, then?"_ She played with the buttons on his shirt before answering quietly,

_"Daddy left."_ She twisted one of the buttons then let go playing with her thumbs, _"'M scared he's not gonna come back."_ He took in a breath,

_"Awh, lass. Don't even worry about that, your daddy's coming back. What made ya think he's not?"_ She shrugged again, avoiding his eyes the way small children do when they're discomfited.

_"'Cuz after Greece him and mummy didn't talk. He camed and played with me and Willy everyday though."_ The little girl furrowed her brows together before continuing, _"Willy and me cried every time he lefted, but he didn't stay."_ Mike nodded listening to the 5 year olds story. He was going to buy a gun and murder Paul for making this little girl so upset. _"I don't know."_ She finally concluded leaning back into him, he hugged her tightly,

_"I'm sure he was sad when he left you."_ The little girl shrugged again before sitting up in his lap again and staring him straight in the eye, she was so innocent and lovely; but so serious,

_"You're not going t' leave, are you?"_ She asked gravely. Mike took his thumbs and swiped at the tears on her cheeks,

_"'O course not! Why in the world would I do that? You're my most favorite Lillian in the whole wide world!_" He exclaimed poking the little girl in the tummy trying to get her to smile. The little girl didn't smile. She looked unconvinced. Her face filled with pain, she finally leaned back a final time and rested against him. Mike rocked slightly until she was half asleep and clinging to him. He laid her down getting up full of anger. He walked quietly into the kitchen, reaching for the phone.

Paul's P.O.V.

Things were going perfectly, Rachael was running herself a bath, and he was somehow managing to cook a late dinner, that was until he heard the phone ring.

_"'Lo?"_ He answered listening to the crackly connection.

_"It's Mike."_

_"'Ey, how are me kids?"_ He asked wiping his hands on a dishtowel, and flicking a piece of food off of the counter for Martha.

_"Will and Holly are fine."_ He clipped shortly, Paul shifted the phone to the other ear,

_"What about Lillian?"_ The line was silent for a moment.

_"Did you tell Rachael about Dot?"_ Paul felt his stomach drop, he was trying to forget about that,

_"No… not yet. How's Lillian?"_ He tried again.

_"You've crippled the poor lass."_ Mike said. Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What th' hell's that supposed to mean?"_

_"The rest of the lot was sleeping. Found the poor girl cryin', managed to get her to tell me what the matter was- apparently she's got it in 'er head that you're going t' leave again. She's got herself worried to death about it."_

_"Well, can I talk to 'er then?"_ Paul asked quietly.

_"She's sleeping, 'm not going t' wake her up just t' get worked up over you."_ He felt his stomach drop,

_"Surely she's not that-"_ Mike cut him off,

_"What, upset? Listen, I'm not going to tell you how t' raise your children, but you and I bloody well know if mum was still around she'd be particularly disappointed."_ Paul's temper quickly rose,

_"Oh piss off, what the fuck do you even know about bein' a dad?"_

_"I know enough t' not cripple a kid, then go off 'nd have to explain to her mum how I got another woman knocked up and left her after the baby miscarried because the relationship- oh how did you put it back then, **'cooled off'**?"_ Paul flinched at his brother's recollection of the events and couldn't even think of a response. Both of them were quiet for a long while before Mike spoke up again.

_"Listen… 'm sorry for blowing up, but… I don't know, be honest with Rachael. I care about 'er a lot, the kids too."_ Mike said evenly. Paul's temper leveled just a bit,

_"Yeah, well, I'm trying me best."_ He finally sighed, pushing away the bad feelings, _"Anyways… tell the kids I love 'em."_

_"I will."_ Both brothers hung up the phone. Paul took a moment to return to the cooking with the phone conversation still ringing in his ears.


	41. Chapter 41

**A/N: Looooonnnggg chapter! Thanks so much for the reviews, guys. They really mean a lot! Btw, I let my cousin half write this chapter, tell us what you think! Happy Reading :)**

**P.S. It gets graphic, so if you don't like that kind of stuff, don't read it! Fair warning!**

* * *

Paul's P.O.V.

Things were going fantastically. Paul managed to get dinner ready and a projector set up to watch a movie before Rachael even stepped out of the bath. Just as he was grabbing blankets to throw on the couch he could hear her call out from the bedroom,

_"I swear I packed them."_ He heard her say quite clearly. He chuckled to himself,

_"What's the matter, love?"_ He called out.

_"I swear to God I packed my nightshirts and now I can't find them."_ Paul smiled inwardly, walking up to the door and knocked, before stepping in. He stepped in and found her searching through her bag, with a towel wrapped around herself. He felt his pants get a bit tighter eyeing her figure,

_"You can borrow a shirt o' mine."_ He offered walking over to suitcase and tossing her the same white button down she wore in Liverpool. She caught it with a sigh,

_"Thanks."_ She said before returning to the bathroom to change, he could feel the evidence of his affection hard pressed against his jeans, it took him a minute to calm down; but he finally managed to before getting back out to the living room.

_"Come 'ead and eat, love. The movie 's starting!"_ He called out to her. He fixed a plate for himself and another for her, when she finally walked out. He handed her the plate as she walked by,

_"Movie?"_ She asked. He nodded going over to the couch and plopping directly down next to her, he was rewarded with an exasperated smile before she looked down at the plate.

_"Seriously?"_ She asked. He looked down at the slab of meat.

_"I told you, you're anemic. Ya have t' eat this."_ She poked at it with a fork looking thoroughly unconvinced. He laughed a little as she picked up the corner and then plopped it back down on the plate; it made a noise. She looked back up at him and shook her head.

_"Eat it, Rach."_ He tried to persuade. She shook her head again laughing lightly. He thought about it for a moment, he knew she needed to eat something,_ "Look, I'll make you a deal."_ She raised an eyebrow,

_"If you eat it… I'll give you a million pounds."_ She shook her head laughing; such a pretty laugh it was,

_"I don't want your money."_ He chuckled,

_"If you eat it… you can kiss me all you want."_ She shook her head laughing even harder,

_"I don't want to kiss you."_ He wiggled his eyebrows.

_"O' course you do._" She shook her head again, _"Alright, fine, how about…"_ He thought about it for a long minute,

_"How about if you eat it and we beat this whole anemia thing, I'll never eat meat again._" She raised an eyebrow considering the offer,

_"Never eating meat again?_" He nodded, _"You'd never do that._" He nodded and raised his right hand,

_"I, Beatle, Paul McCartney, promise you, Rachael Noelle Belter, that I will never eat meat again if we beat this anemia thing."_ She laughed again at his antics and he pulled her close to him resting his forehead against her's. She must've been surprised by his actions but just laughed lightly,

_"You're serious."_ She said,

_"Completely."_

_"Fine."_ He grinned widely and buried his face in her neck, tickling her. She wiggled away, he finally eased up leaning over her, before pinching her on the backside,

_"Get to it, missy."_

And she did… somewhat. They watched the movie in comfortable silence, not that he was paying attention, he was making sure that she ate. She managed about a third of the serving before looking uninterestedly at it and putting it down on the small coffee table before the couch. He studied what she ate, it wasn't too bad considering she had gone without eating for quite some time. Rachael caught sight of him looking at her and turned towards him with than insatiable little smirk that seemed to make her eyes twinkle,

_"Take a picture, it'll last longer."_ He chuckled pulling her into his side and planting a kiss on top of her head,

_"You're just lovely, you know that?"_ She nodded,

_"I know, I'm perfect."_ He smiled, she was… how could one put it? Much like he described it before- a bad habit, hard to get ahold of, and something you'd never want to quit.

_"You're also a brat."_ He could hear her scoff,

_"Me?"_ He let out a sigh looking down his nose at her,

_"Yes you. Eat some more."_ She shook her head,

_"I ate like half of it, I'm stuffed."_ He peered over at the plate,

_"Love, that's hardly half."_ She rested her chin on his chest looking up at him,

_"That definitely is half."_ He rested his forehead against her's again,

_"That most definitely is not half."_ She pulled away reaching for her fork and stabbing at a small piece she had previously cut up before shoving it in her mouth, barely chewing then swallowing it dramatically,

_"Happy?"_ She said with a flit to her voice,

_"There's my girl! See, it's not so bad!"_ She tossed the fork back and looked back up at him,

_"Yes it was. And I'm not your girl."_ He chuckled, she was cute when she tried to be rebellious,

_"Okay so maybe I'm not th' best cook, but you're my girl."_

_"You're right, you suck at cooking. But, I'm still not your girl."_

_"O' course you're my girl."_

_"Nope."_

_"Yes."_

_"Nope."_

_"Yes."_

_"Paul, I'm not your-"_

_"Yes you are."_

_"No I'-"_

_"Yes you are."_ She looked at him laughing, every time she started to talk he interrupted her,

_"Sto-"_

_"Yes you are."_ She huffed, with a smile on her face. She was just too damn pretty, he hated the effect she had upon him, but loved it at the same time. She gave up and turned her attention back to the movie, he pulled her back on top of himself spreading out underneath her,

_"Quit pulling me all over yourself."_ She said, he chuckled,

_"It's where you belong, love. I've got to keep meself warm."_

_"Go cuddle with Martha if you're cold."_ Rachael laughed,

_"No. I want t' cuddle with you."_ She sighed and finally relaxed into him, instantly her spunk and energy were gone. The doctor had said it was going to be like this- with her being tired and all. He made sure she was comfortable, head tucked beneath his chin, body positioned directly over his. Paul pulled a blanket from their side and made a wrap around them. Finally he squeezed his arms around her,

_"Comfy, love?"_ He whispered. He got a small, exhausted,** 'yep'** in response. He tried not to get too worked up over the fact that she was practically naked underneath the button down, pressed up against him; sleeping. Christ, he couldn't think of that now, two months without so much as touching or eyeing another bird was an eternity for him. He eased out from under her after a while, the evidence in his jeans too noticeable to hide and made his way to the bathroom.

Gasping quietly as he took hold of the most sensitive part of his body, whilst feeling bad for himself, he made quick work of it and got himself off. He then got ready for bed, he just wanted to make love to her, he knew he had to be patient, but he was determined.

After getting himself ready for bed, he returned to the couch finding the projector screen now black and the movie long over; he was also amused to find Rachael cuddled up with Martha. The dog was besotted with herself, she was extremely loyal to Rachael and the kids. He managed to pry the huge, fluffy, lump of an animal away from her side, scooping up Rachael- who was now dead asleep, and carried her back to the room. He settled in for the night making sure she was tightly tucked to his side, and promptly fell asleep. She was his.

Mike's P.O.V.

God, if all kids were this easy, he wanted to have an entire brood of them with Ang. He woke up early, Jim took Holly to his study for the day without saying so much as a word to any of them. Ruth was off with his stepmother and he was left with the older two.

_"What do you lot want t' do today?_" He asked the 5 year olds,

_"Snow."_ William replied through a mouth full of pancakes. He chuckled and looked over to Lillian who was absentmindedly pushing the food around her plate,

_"And you, pretty?"_ She looked up at him, just becoming aware of the conversation, she looked over at William and the boy nodded. It was like they knew what the other was thinking- Mike was amazed by this,

_"Yeah, snow."_ Mike nodded and went to go get mittens and hats, when he came back he stopped short of the door listening in to the two children discussing something,

_"Eat something, Lily."_ William said quietly.

_"'M not hungry."_ She answered placidly,

_"Just take a bite, then we could go play."_ He heard the scraping of a fork, then the little girl's voice came again,

_"I'm really not hungry."_ She said in a whisper.

_"It doesn't matter, mummy and daddy will be back soonish. You have t' still eat."_ Mike eaves dropped on the rest of the conversation, apparently the little girl didn't eat when she was upset. Mike was pissed, Paul was a downright arsehole for making her so distressed. He waited until their discussion ended and walked back into the kitchen to bundle them up.

Before he knew it, it was nearing evening. All day William and Lillian had been out in the front yard playing in the snow, not stopping for even lunch. Mike watched through the window, the boy was clearly taking very good care of the little girl. He'd drag her around on the sled, always making sure she was safe and well attended to. Lillian was sullen. She didn't move much, unless William patiently told her to do something. Mike decided not to interfere, the boy obviously knew her well enough to take extremely detailed care of her.

When it was finally dinner time, he brought the pair back in. William took Lily by her tiny gloved hand and helped her out of her snow attire before getting out of his own. He then pushed back her slightly damp, snowy hair from her face and took her to the kitchen where Mike had set up dinner. The boy watched carefully, Mike kept out of his way. The boy pointed at her plate,

_"Eat._" He ordered quietly. Lillian didn't say much she just pushed it around her plate, the boy took it in stride, "It's really good." He tried to persuade, she looked disinterested and just shrugged. After about twenty minutes of coaxing Mike was amazed that William had gotten her to eat a little more than half of the food set before her. It was undeniable that the two children were attached in every way possible.

Paul's P.O.V.

He woke up with his arms wrapped around Rachael- the way things should be, to a whining Martha beside the bed. Paul groaned and managed to squint at his watch on the bedside table through the darkness. Sure enough it was nearing 5 o'clock in the afternoon, they had slept the day away! He unwrapped his grip from her and rolled out of bed to quickly let the dog out and fill her food bowl before crawling back into bed, she stirred slightly, opening her eyes a bit,

_"What time is it?"_ She whispered,

_"5:30."_ She raised one sleepy eyebrow,

_"Morning?"_ He shook his head slightly, yawning whilst tucking her in back underneath his chin,

_"Afternoon, go back to sleep."_ She pushed away a little bit,

_"We slept the entire day?_" He shrugged, he didn't care.

_"Doesn't matter, go back t' sleep."_ And they did.

Jim's P.O.V.

He looked at the child sitting on his lap. A cute one she was, large brown doe eyes and soft, nearing black, hair. His own son, how could he have made such a stupid mistake? He and his first wife, Mary, worked hard to put the lad on the right path, how could things have gone so wrong? Sure, he was proud at all his son had accomplished- the fame, success, all while keeping his feet somewhat planted on the ground. But now this whole Dorothy Rhone incident, Jim remembered when she and Paul had told him they were expecting- Jim had told the 17 year old he had to marry her and support the girl and the child. But the girl had lost the baby and Paul left her. Now the position his eldest son was in made him wary. Rachael was a lovely girl- pretty, kind, and in some ways reminded him of Mary when she took care of the children, and she was pregnant again.

The baby leaning back against him brought him back to reality,

_"Ah lass, never grow up, okay?"_ The baby just looked up at him with a drippy smile.

Rachael's P.O.V.

The next time I woke up Paul had a tight grip around my middle, I managed to ease out of it just a bit, he took a sharp inhale of breath and woke up as well, I turned towards him. His eyes were droopy and sleep stricken, and he had a line of a pillow crease on his face. He gave me a small smile,

_"How'd my girl sleep?_" I rolled my eyes fleetingly amused,

_"I don't know how your girl slept, but I slept okay."_ He chuckled and pinched my side mumbling** 'cheeky'**. He reached over behind himself and fumbled for his watch bringing it up close to his face to get a look in the dark,

_"8:45, miss."_ He informed me, I couldn't believe we had slept the entire day away, _"Are you hungry?"_ I thought about it for a moment,

_"Not really."_ I said quietly. That was the truth, all this medicine had done so far was make me tired, and lessen up the sickness. Paul looked at me, reaching up a hand to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear,

_"Really?"_ I shrugged,

_"I'm just sleepy."_ He sighed,

_"Maybe it's because you don't eat."_ He retorted quietly. I stared blankly back at him. It was nice that he cared, but I just wasn't feeling a hundred percent.

Paul's P.O.V.

He looked her over once again, she was staring blankly back at him. She needed to eat, and he promised himself that he would take care of her.

_"I'm going t' make toast, you'll it eat it, yes?"_ She just shrugged, he wasn't really giving her an option.

He got out of bed and spent a few minutes browning toast and grabbing tea. When he returned to he bedroom she was sitting up looking to him, he grinned striding over to bed and plopping down, he handed her a cup and a slice and she munched on it, he was clearly pleased. She finished the first one, and he attempted to hand her a second, she shook her head slightly,

_"I'm full."_ He then shook his head,

_"For me?" _Rachael sighed looking at him for a moment, then took it having a few bites. He smiled planting a kiss on her cheek. _"There's my girl."_ He said happily. She rolled her eyes,

_"I'm not your girl._" He chuckled,

_"O' course you're my girl."_ She started to say something but he interrupted her, _"Yes you are. No arguments, miss."_ She rolled her eyes again and laid back down throwing an arm above her head. He put the plate and mugs on the bedside table and laid back down next to her, pulling her close and burying his face into the side of her neck,

_"Iloveyou,Iloveyou,Iloveyou."_ He mumbled into her neck before passing back out.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I couldn't fall back asleep. There was something about the word love- I don't know, it just struck me in the wrong way every single time it was uttered. Paul was snoring against my neck, to be completely honest I was absolutely frightened, I never ever wanted anyone to say those words to me. After about an hour or so I managed to slip out of his arms and crawl out of bed grabbing a pair of sweatpants from my bag and a tighter fitting shirt. As I stepped out of the room Martha nudged into my leg, I scratched her behind the ears and refilled her food bowl before grabbing a pair of boots and pulling them on. I went out the front door to let the dog out, not even bothering to pull it closed all the way behind me. I stood a bit away from the house, lost in my own thoughts. The dog must've gone in after some time but I stayed put just thinking. What the hell was love?

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul woke up around midnight to an empty bed, and a near silent room. He threw on a sweater and a pair of pants before venturing out into the common room. Rachael was nowhere to be found. He noticed Martha's food bowl already filled, and a light- melting of snow left on her fur,

_"It was nice of our girl to let you out."_ He said to the dog, _"Where is she?"_ He pulled on a pair of boots leaving out the front door, was standing not 10 feet away from the door, with arms crossed staring out into the darkness of the frigid night.

Paul interrupted her thoughts. _"Excuse me, miss, but it's December in Scotland. No coat?"_

_"I'm not cold."_

_"Ah, lass but I am. Come on inside, now."_ He said pulling her back into the room. He shut the door behind them, grabbing for her hand as she walked away from him.

_"You're bloody freezing,"_ he said, pulling her to him and wrapping his arms around her in an effort to warm her up. She tried twisting out of his hold.

_"I've already told you,_" she said,_ "I'm not cold."_

_"Well that may be so, but you're looking hot."_ He said with a grin. She pulled away from him stumbling over to the dresser, pretending to search around for something in her suitcase. He ran his hands through his hair letting out a frustrated sigh, what was the use of trying to ignore it?

_"Alright, out with it, what's the matter?"_ He was completely lost.

_"What do you mean?"_ she asked.

Rachael's P.O.V.

_"Are you upset?_" I shook my head, obviously lying.

He looked up at me with saddened eyes, deciding to call me out.

_"There's something off."_ I looked down at the floor awkwardly, his eyes felt like they were burning a hole straight through my center.

_"No? I'm fine really. I swear."_ He crossed his arms; I looked away focusing instead on the window pane.

_"Rachael. I know you're not telling th' truth. I thought things were going good… really good, actually."_ I sighed bringing my attention to Martha, who was lying in front of the heater,

_"I am. I promise."_ In reality my mind was out of control, I couldn't decide what I wanted. Paul walked over pulling me into a hug; I let him, in hopes that he would let it go.

He sighed, pressing leaning over to press his cheek against mine,

_"I love you."_ He said, immediately I froze feeling scared. He must've noticed and let me go a little bit; I put on a fake smile and returned to the bedroom letting out a frantic breath. What was I going to do? I fumbled around in my suitcase not really knowing what to do, I suddenly felt tired. Paul walked in; I couldn't read the expression on his face. I gave him a small smile and refolded any of my clothes that were rumpled up. I felt Paul coming up behind me, he gently took the apparel out of my hands and turned me around to face him, pulling me into a tight hug again.

Paul's P.O.V

She felt tense in his arms, definitely not comfortable almost like she was… scared?

_"What are you so afraid of?"_ He stroked her cheek gently, trying to get her to relax. He could feel her drawing away from him. Paul held her firmly. He saw tears sting her eyes and she blinked them back. Swallowing, she said, "I'm not afraid of anything."

_"Alright, no running away this time."_ He trailed a gentle kiss from her cheek, to her ear._ "Talk to me, Rach. I really don't think that it's me you're afraid of."_ He murmured.

_"Why can't you just leave it alone and take what I can give you?"_ She asked quietly.

_"Because I'm selfish and I want all of you. Forever."_

_"What if forever never comes?"_ She said softly.

Paul looked into her dark eyes wondering where the hell this was coming from, when the thought suddenly struck him- she was terrified something bad was going to happen, that's why she kept trying to distance herself. _"You're afraid we won't make it, aren't you? You're afraid that I'm going to find some reason to leave?"_ When she closed her eyes, he knew he had hit home. _"Ah, Rach…"_ He gathered her closer taking a hand and stroking her glossy hair,_ "Don't even believe that could ever happen for a minute."_ He pulled her back to the bed and took a seat pulling her onto his lap.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I swallowed hard to steady my voice and asked_ "How can I? What if we don't make it? If things don't work out between us… I don't even know, what about the kids? I couldn't do what I did in Greece again by taking Lily… I can't-"_ My voice was so shaky, I had to stop.

_"Oh, Rachael. Come on, darling. That won't happen!"_ He sounded surprised that I was so worried.

_"Why Paul?_" I demanded. _"Can you give me a reason to believe that?"_

The silence was horrible.

Hope was spiraling out of existence as the minutes ticked by. There was a funny thing about hope- It only takes one word, one gesture to bring it spiraling back. Paul did that, let hope rush back after his silence had let it spin away. He pulled me tightly against him, so tightly that because I was sitting sideways to him, it was awkward enough to hurt. He held me in that vise-like embrace until my lungs were begging for air and then let me go. Completely.

Paul's P.O.V.

She didn't know about Dot, this conversation was going to see worthless when she found out, but he continued anyways putting the whole Dot thing out of his mind. She belonged to him for the week, and no one was going to change that.

_"You're right,_" he said slowly, words heavy with regret. _"There aren't any guarantees…but… I love you. Please be here with me."_ Just that, then aching silence.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I stared out the window at the stars, cold and distant and hard now. I couldn't say anything. Paul sighed and tipped his head back against the wall.

I didn't cry, we didn't argue, and I didn't get up and walk away. I leaned back against him. We sat quietly for a while, each wrapped up in our own thoughts when he said,

_"Just tell me one thing you're scared of."_ I thought about it for a moment- that wasn't too much to ask considering the situation we were in. First I was scared of change, then I was scared of the unknown, but above all it scared me when he told me he loved me- I had never told anyone that. Ever. I was in love with my children, but obviously not in a 'relationship' kind of way, but I had to admit Paul had basically dealt with and stuck with me this entire time- which I was assured was no easy feat.

_"I don't know if I can fit in with your life."_ I said half-heartedly, it wasn't exactly a fear of mine- but it was pretty darn close.

_"You fit in fine already, love!"_ He turned me sideways, lifted my legs over his leg, and tucked me back in his arms. _"Besides. You fit right here. That's all that counts. The rest will sort itself out."_

_"Will it? You can't be sure of that."_

_"Rachael,"_ he said softly,_ "We've already made it this far together. We're a fantastic team. Now, I can't promise that anything bad is never going t' happen- God knows with our track record we'll argue about every single bloody thing- but I do promise I'll always be there. Besides, I already have."_ I nodded, it sounded so easy- why was it so hard though?

We both were silent for a while, I didn't know what to think. Just as I read him by touch, he felt me shiver and knew I wasn't cold._ "It's alright, Rach."_ He held me tightly. _"I just want to touch you. If you want to stop, just tell me. You don't have to do anything you don't want t' do."_ Then I knew it was going to be alright. Whatever he did, whatever I knew or didn't know, it would be alright. It never occurred to me not to believe him. That wasn't just from my experience or plain idiocy; it was the simple, honest way he said it. No uneasiness, just quiet perseverance. I put my arms around his neck and gave him my answer.

He examined every finger, every line of my hand. Kissing it softly before moving to my wrist, my arm. Running his fingers and his eyes over my body bit by bit.

My shoulders and neck. Always leaving each new area explored with a kiss before continuing on. He then reached for the buttons of the button down shirt; I must've tensed up a little because he looked up at me, a little surprised. _"No?"_ he asked. I thought about it for a minute and nodded a little letting out a small, _"Yes."_ He smiled reaching up to touch my face, to touch my lips with his finger tips and slowly tracing his way down to the collar to unbutton it. Pulling it away gently lifting the straps of my bra and with a warm caress slid them down my arms. He held onto my hands for a moment as he looked at me. _"Oh, yeah,"_ he said quietly.

Taking my breasts in his hands. Feeling the surface, the weight, the movement of them. Barely skimming my nipples with the tips of his fingers. Delicately, as if memorizing some passage written in Braille, then pushing his face against them with a soft moan.

Then down over my stomach, drawing with his finger down to my belly button, he stopped for a moment then looked up at me with a small grin,

_"What's this?"_ He asked quietly. I looked down to where he was touching, and let out a little laugh at the memory, and how stupid I had been, he still had his finger on the tiny place where a stud had once been worn,

_"Belly button piercing."_ He raised an eyebrow with a mischievous grin, _"I was 17, I had to hide it from my parents."_ He chuckled loudly placing a kiss there as he moved down. Slightly tugging at my panties. He looked up at me asking for the **'okay?'** and I nodded. He gently pulled them off with a small moan, Spreading my legs as he examined an area of my body I would have thought he already knew pretty well. He spread me wide. A kiss there sending shock waves through me and he moved on.

When he had finished with the last little toe. He rolled me onto my stomach and began to move up my legs and over my bottom. Feeling with his hand the scoop of the small of my back. A lingering kiss before straddling my legs as he used both hands to cover every inch of my back.

Lifting my hair to expose the back of my neck. Spreading himself out on me as he fondled and kissed my neck and ears. After a moment or so he turned me around to face him where I was met with a kiss,

_"You're okay?"_ He reassured, locking eyes with mine. I nodded,

_"Yeah."_ He pulled me back into another kiss.

Paul's P.O.V.

He couldn't believe it, two whole months, he was going to fuck her silly! He reached around and caressed her bottom, God, she was fucking perfect. He still had a pair of jeans on, her hand ran across the front where the evidence of his affection was hard pressed and he let out a small moan,

_"That has to be uncomfortable._" She said quietly, he nodded solemnly, his eyes dark with want,

_"Aye, it is."_ She skillfully unzipped and he shrugged them off, taking off his sweater too, total body contact, her hand ran up and down his length lightly, he thought he was going to explode. He groaned a little and she knew exactly what that meant. Paul pushed her back getting on top of her and sunk himself in with a guttural moan. He tried taking it slow,

_"I can't-"_ He tried to explain, she silenced him with a kiss and he exploded nearly shouting. It took him a minute or so to catch his breath, he looked down at her,

_"Sorry love, it's been a while."_ She shrugged while he ran a hand through her hair,

_"Maybe we shouldn't wait so long next time."_

Hours had passed, they had made love nearly 5 times since. He never knew he could come and within minutes be ready to go again. She had absolutely bewitched him.

Rachael had fallen asleep laying on her stomach her dark hair tumbling over her bare skin. Paul stretched out beside her, pulling a slip of sheet over her bum and watched her sleep. The thought hit him, he had managed to forget about it until now, he had to tell her about Dot. How was she going to react? How was he going to convince her to stay with him? He remembered the night after the benefit when he had to leave to go home and take care of Martha. She called him and asked him to come back, that had to mean she at least wanted him around, right? He had to work with that.

A chill engulfed the house and Paul got out of bed and tossed another log on the fire and let Martha out. He glanced at the mantel clock; 3 o'clock in the morning. Would he ever get a full night sleep again?


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: Filler chapter, my cousin wrote it. Review it pleeease? :)**

* * *

Mike's P.O.V.

The next morning Jim had taken Holly off as usual to his study, without so much as a pat on the head to the two older children who were half asleep at the kitchen table. Mike could tell his father had a special attachment to the little one. Ang had come home from work and was outside playing with his younger stepsister, Ruth. He served eggs to the 5 year olds, William ate his, Lillian was completely withdrawn not even making an effort to reach for the fork. William finished his, finally noticing Lillian,

_"Come 'ead, Lily."_ He took the little girls hand in his own was attempted to make her pick up the fork. She was like jelly, she wouldn't gasp the fork, she just sat there sullen. Mike watched this from the other corner of the kitchen having himself a cup of tea, not interfering with the boys' effort. After a while the boy gave up, and climbed off of his own chair and onto hers putting an arm around her shoulder.

Lillian's P.O.V.

She wanted daddy. William had an arm around her shoulder and began whispering into her ear,

_"Wassa matter?"_ He asked. She shrugged, she didn't feel like moving or talking. The boy looked over at her planting a sloppy kiss on her cheek. _"You're my bestest girl, you know that?"_ She nodded, she knew it perfectly well. Uncle Mike came over and smiled at William,

_"You want to go play outside in the snow?"_ William nodded immensely, she didn't move, she just stared at him. _"Ruth's outside, what about you Lily?"_ William tightened his grip just a bit she still didn't say anything. _"How about if you and I stayed inside for a little bit, then we go outside?"_ Uncle Mike asked again. She showed no difference; William gave her a kiss on the cheek, and scooted down from the chair running to retrieve his mittens and hat. Uncle Mike bundled him up and let him outside. She sat still in her chair. She wanted Mummy. Uncle Mike came back and picked her up from the chair,

_"Would you like to spend the day with me, pretty?"_ She just stared at him. She didn't care.

Mike's P.O.V.

The child had completely shut herself down psychologically. Cold, impassive eyes stared back at him. He brought her out to the front room and bundled her up in her little yellow coat and helped put mittens on her tiny hands. He figured he'd take her to the toy shop to try and cheer her up, it was the best idea he could think of at the moment.

He carried her into the store, trying to liven her up. I bounced her on his hip and pointed at the playthings, she looked disinterested. Mike wanted to strangle Paul with his bare hands, he felt terribly for the little girl. He walked around with her for a little while trying to get her at least interested in something, he walked past rows and rows of stuffed animals he grabbed one and pretended to make it give her a kiss, she didn't laugh, she just stayed miserable. He tried tickling her, she stayed stone leaning into him. When at last he couldn't find a single thing more she came to an abrupt attention and she pointed to a doll. It was a cute little thing, brown hair and brown eyes. He brought her over and picked it up to give it to her, she smiled a little bit at it. He grinned, at least he had gotten that much out of her,

_"What're you going to name it, pretty?"_ She shrugged.

_"Her name's Mary."_ She stated simply as if it were common knowledge. Mike stopped in his tracks, much to the fact that it was his mum's name.

_"Why're you naming her that, pretty?"_ She shrugged,

_"She looks like her."_ Mike raised an eyebrow.

_"Looks like who?"_ She clutched the little doll in her arms,

_"You know."_ He looked down at the child she wasn't paying any attention to him. She was busy moving the dolls arms and inspecting her shoes. Mike put it out of his mind, a coincidence was all it was really.

When they arrived at the house the little girl was still surely upset, he could tell. She didn't want to play, she refused to eat, all she did was sit quietly on the couch toying with the doll's hair. William had tried to coax her out of the mood, it was no use. Mike himself decided to pay extra special attention to her. His own father had taken Holly, Ang was besotted with William, and he got Lillian. He plopped down on the couch next to her after everyone had eaten dinner… except for her. Mike pulled the little girl onto his lap,

_"Are you sad, pretty?"_ She shook her head and continued playing with the dolls' hair, _"It's okay t' be sad, you know?"_ She didn't say anything she continued playing with the dolls' dark brown tresses. _"Do you want t' ring your daddy on the phone?"_ He asked hoping for some kind of response.

_"Nope, he doesn't love me."_ She said calmly. Mike was absolutely shocked at the words that had come out of her mouth,

_"Why in the world would ya think that, love?"_ He said lifting her chin so she was looking him straight in the eye. She shrugged again as if it were common sense.

_"Mummy said you shouldn't say things you don't mean. He tolded me that he loved me 'nd lefted again."_ She blinked a couple of times, _"So, he doesn't love me."_ She explained as if trying to place it out in plain English for him.

_"Of course he loves you! Your daddy didn't leave, pretty! He 'nd your mummy just went on a little holiday!"_ He tried to convince her. The 5 year old shook her head slightly tipping it to the side a bit. She had experienced too much sadness for such a short life,

_"He lefted. He doesn't love me. He maded Willy and I cry."_ She pursed her lips together,_ "I used to love him, and I don't leave. That's not fair."_ Mike listened to the simple, innocence she had just laid out before him. She was too well judged for her years. He sighed a little, there was no use trying to convince her otherwise, the girl had made up her mind.

_"You're right, lass. That isn't fair."_ He gave her a kiss on the cheek, snuggling her close. _"He does love you though, alright?"_ The child shook her head.

_"You shouldn't say things that aren't true."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

When I woke up, Paul was running his hands all over my body, he leaned into me when I was fully awake,

_"I like having you 'ere when I wake up."_ I laughed lightly,

_"Go let Martha out."_ He groaned dramatically,

_"I don't want to get up. I don't ever want t' leave the bed again."_I reached down next to the bed where my button down shirt had been thrown and Paul pulled it from my hands.

_"We do need to leave the bed, bodily functions and food, wiseguy." _He pinned me down, trailing kisses down to my neck;

_"There's only one bodily function I want t' do right now."_

I groaned, _"You've done it more than enough, I'm not going to be able to walk straight."_ He chuckled and looked up at me,

_"Good. Then you'll have t' stay in bed."_

Paul's P.O.V.

He flipped her around and reached down his free hand from behind her and grabbed her crotch, pulling her back against his erection and grinding himself hard and rhythmically against her. He made sure she felt every inch of him, letting her know who was running this show, before he pushed her down onto the bed. Paul mounted her before giving her a chance to protest, forcing her legs apart and pinning her down with his weight. He then made his descent down to her breasts, he couldn't get enough of them! He was fascinated by how firm and high they sat. After sucking hungrily at them he worked his way back up, She bit at his bottom lip and opened her mouth to accept another deep kiss. Paul could not remember the last time he was this turned on. Pulling birds had almost lost its joy, the thrill of the chase had all but gone. But this girl was pushing him into overdrive, he had not wanted a girl this badly ever.

His hand drew to her thighs and his fingers began to wander he dipped them inside and groaned at how tight and wet she was. She was on fire and Paul worried he would not be able to hold back. Paul straddled her and forced himself inside, bringing her legs around him plunging deeper and deeper while she met him stroke for stroke. He felt her building and leaned down to suckle on her breasts- bathing them with his tongue, sucking and nibbling as she whimpered softly. He then felt her explode around him. _"There's a girl. Come for me,"_ he said huskily, slowing down waiting long enough for her to recover before resuming his pace. He was moving faster, faster, slamming himself so hard into her, his whole length to the hilt, wanting to lose his entire self inside her, He needed to possess her totally, and expending himself inside her the only thing that came close. Could she possibly understand that?

Once he knew she was satisfied he let loose, with a shudder Paul came with such a force they almost fell off the bed never feeling anything like this ever before. She clung to him as his hips thrust spastically until he moaned her name loudly as she drained every drop from him.

Rachael stayed with him, he held her tightly until their breathing returned to normal. Rachael took in a pocket of air and finally looked into his face. He looked down at her amazedly. He had never felt so much intensity as he came before, surely this was the best he had ever had.

_"I've never felt like that before, why is that?"_ He asked quietly, she shrugged lightly.

Paul combed his fingers through her hair not wanting to let her go, _"I wish I understood. Do you know what we're going t' do about it?"_ She raised an eyebrow and shook her head. _"Be together, it's th' only thing that makes sense."_ He ran a finger around her swollen lips still pulsing from his kisses. She shrugged slightly as if she didn't actually believe him._ "Nothing is impossible. I can cut ties and so can you. You just need to commit t' being with me."_ He went on laying it all out for her, _"We can move in together, 'nd make a home."_ Rachael stared at him for a few moments, whilst he searched her eyes for any sign of an answer to his question- it drove him crazy that he could never guess what she was thinking. After a bit she rolled out from under him reaching for the button down shirt while attempting to stand. She staggered a bit. Paul steadied her from behind. His eyes implored her.

She threw on the shirt running a hand through her hair, _"Don't."_ He raised an eyebrow as if to ask **'what?'** _"Don't ask me to do that, it's way too difficult."_

_"Hang the complications, I'll deal with them. Look at the life we could have together."_ He waited until she was standing there facing away from him in silence before he reached for her waist and pulled her back to sit on his lap. Surprisingly enough she rested her head against his chest. He kissed her forehead,

_"Whaddya say, miss?"_ He queried quietly. She turned somewhat in his lap looking up slightly into his eyes.

_"I can't see why you can't just let it be what it is. Why isn't that enough?"_

He yanked her tighter to him, "_Like I said, I'm selfish 'nd I want all of you forever."_

_"All of me?"_ Paul nodded solemnly,

_"All of you."_ She looked slightly detached

_"What is that supposed to mean?"_ He took up her little china doll hands in his own rubbing a thumb over them.

_"It means that you're my girl, and we're together. It means it's just us. That's it. It means ya let me take care of you. Means you're mine… only mine."_ She looked slightly up at him.

_"Only yours?"_ He nodded.

_"Only mine."_ He saw her roll her eyes a bit and he pinched her side,

_"No sass, miss. I'm dead on, you're only mine. I don't want other blokes pissin' about."_

_"There isn't anyone else, Paul. You know that."_

_"Do I?"_ She looked up at his as if to ask if he was joking,

_"Don't play dumb, you know there hasn't been anyone since Phillip."_ He sighed slightly and nodded,

_"Yeah, well, I guess I do know that."_ He kissed her again, he felt the electricity again, he moaned a little on top of her lips, after pulling away he looked into those insanely dark eyes that he loved,_ "Rach, I know you felt that too."_ He whispered, she reached up and brushed hair from his forehead. She just nodded a little before she said,

_"We'll work on it."_ Then she got up and made her way towards the door with a small smile.

He was taking that as a yes.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I got up and ready for the day. Things were going good- really good actually. Martha's fluffy form bowled into my legs as I left the bathroom. I knelt down scratching behind her ears and kissing the top of her downy head before going to refill her food bowl. After a minute or two Paul came out of the bedroom with a grin on his face. He went into the kitchen and pulled out a pan and the making for eggs, he was whistling away, I was scratching the dog, and she was loving it. I had taken quite a liking to Martha, she was such a well tempered dog- a little idiotic at times, but no doubt a sweetheart.

_"Hey, come eat."_ Paul called, I turned around Martha trailed at my heels, Paul chuckled. "_Someone's made a best friend."_ I smiled patting the dog, as I took a seat. Paul brought me a plate, we ate in comfortable silence, it was actually good between us for once- I could definitely live like this. I finished half of my plate- I was still getting used to eating, Paul's eyes implored me from the other side of the table, I sighed and took another few bites. Paul smiled and mouthed 'thank-you'. I nodded. We got up after a while, he went to mess with the radio and I started clearing away dishes,

_"I'll be right back, love. I left the battery in th' car."_ I nodded as he pulled on boots and stepped out the front door into the biting wind. This was easy. I liked where we were at. Things were good. I was happy.

Paul's P.O.V.

He walked out to the car to grab the battery for the radio. He got it and turned back towards the house whistling a little tune, this was great! He pulled back open the front door, enjoying the rush of warm against the frigid outdoors. Paul stood in the doorway watching Rachael. She didn't notice him. She was singing quietly in a lovely little voice while she washed dishes. Paul admired her figure even noting the small bump that he had put under her shirt. God, how much he wanted to put a ring on her pretty little finger, she'd be the perfect little wife. He smiled thinking how good it would be with all those wild children underfoot- more than there were now, and the silly dog that was basically a lump of fur, and—hell, he couldn't think of anything he wanted more. A minute or so passed and Rachael finally looked up at him from the sink smiling a bit before wrinkling her nose the cute way she did,

_"Close the door! You're letting all the cold in!"_ He chuckled and stepped inside. He went over to the radio fiddling with it and changing the batteries. When he managed to finally get it into working order he set up the antennas and tried to find a signal. He kept getting fuzzy reception remembering how far up the continent they were and realizing he probably wouldn't get that great of a signal until he finally found one. It came clear through he recognized the song; Procol Harum's A Whiter Shade of Pale; he looked over at Rachael and he knew she knew the song as well. He smiled a little,

_"Come 'ere."_ She tilted her head to the side a little confused a bit but nonetheless walked over to him. He stood up pulling his arms around her waist and tugging her arms around his neck, he leaned down singing in her ear, and kissing his way down the side of her neck. He waltzed her around the room and more than once he caught her giggling; this only made him happier. Once the song finished he pulled back a little to look down his nose at her while continuing to dance her around the room.

_"That'll be our song, miss."_ She started laughing, and she swatted at him.

_"You're such a moron."_ He chuckled,

_"A cute moron, I can assure you."_ She busted out laughing. He picked her up and walked back to the bedroom.

Let's just say he did something right because he had scratch marks all over his back when he finished.

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**A/N: Review it!**


	43. Chapter 43

**A/N: A chapter full of filler, my cousin wrote it- I liked it, so I used it. Okay. Haha. Review it, I'll love you forever. I'l update soon. Have a nice day.**

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Mike's P.O.V.

The next time he woke up he was still on the couch with the little girl on his lap leaning against him. He rubbed his eyes and brought his watch up to his face, **5:49 a.m**. His eyebrows raised a little bit, he must've fallen asleep. He leaned down a little, Lillian was ignoring everything with her eyes fixed on the telly and her doll in her lap. Mike instantly knew she hadn't fallen asleep at all last night,

_"Good morning, pretty."_ She glanced up at him for only a second, _"Did you sleep?"_ he already knew the answer, and the little girl shook her head signaling;** no**. He sighed, having a real need for a cigarette. He reached into his front pocket feeling for a pack before remembering that he'd run out. He kissed the little girl on top of the head,

_"Let's go to the corner store."_ He picked her up and bundled her up in her coat; stuffing her hands into mittens; and pulling a hat on her head. Mike had to laugh at how adorable she looked when she was all bundled up, it was a bit of a challenge for her to move her arms when she had so many layers on. He through on a coat, himself and picked up the layer-bound child heading out the door.

Nothing could have prepared him for this; Mike had figured that soon enough the little girl would tire out, but she did no such thing. When they arrived at the corner store he walked up to the counter pointing at a pack for the clerk and bounced her on his hip, her eyes were elsewhere though. Mike followed their direction before she pointed at a magazine,

_"That's mummy and daddy."_ Mike himself took a look at the publication. Sure enough on the cover were Paul and Rachael- he found this pretty common by now, the press couldn't get enough of them. This was different though; next to a photograph of the pair, there was another of a blonde with a pixie cut that he recognized indefinitely it was Dorothy Rhone. The title blared; Tell-all, and Mike felt the blood rush from his face. The clerk turned around with the pack of cigarettes, and Mike quickly threw the magazine onto the counter as well. Whilst the clerk was ringing him up he glanced up at Mike and the child; a second later he glanced up again,

_"'Ey aren't you McCartney's brother?"_ It was pretty common knowledge around these parts; Mike nonchalantly nodded avoiding eye contact. The clerk was still staring at him, and then the child before raising his eyebrows in question, _"Is that 'is kid too?"_ Mike sighed; he really couldn't deny it so he nodded again, the clerk let out a whistle, _"She's the spittin' image of 'im I'd say."_ Mike placed money on the counter not even waiting for change before picking up his purchase and leaving the store altogether.

Mike drove quickly home where he brought Lily inside laying her down on the couch to watch the telly. It was still early and no one else was awake. He lit a ciggy and pulled out the magazine he had just purchased flipping through until he found what he was looking for. He quickly ran through it puffing heavily on the cigarette, this was bad- really bad.

He went on to read Dorothy's side of the story, she put it out plainly that she and Paul had broken up after she had lost their child. Mike couldn't believe what he was reading- he couldn't justify why Dot was doing this. He finished the reading and shoved out his cigarette before grabbing the phone.

Paul's P.O.V.

He watched her sleep for a while- a small smile on her face and the white slip of sheet pulled over her bum. He'd done her good last night. That was until he heard the phone ring- he hopped up off the mattress throwing on his discarded shirt and pants heading out into the front room.

_"'Lo?"_ he answered buttoning up the last of his shirt,

_"It's Mike."_

_"Hey, son. How're me kids?"_

_"That's not what I'm calling about."_ Paul took this badly, _"The story is all over the papers."_ Paul gulped- he had been warned,

_"Define 'all over'."_

_"I mean I went t' the bleedin' corner store with yer daughter and she pointed out the magazine."_ Paul leaned against the wall,

_"Which one?"_

_"Lily, you git."_ He sighed- his headache returned; he had to tell Rachael,

_"What'd Dot write?"_ Mike relayed the story word for word; Paul listened intently- she had told the truth,

_"Have you told Rachael yet?"_ Mike asked seriously, Paul gulped.

_"Not yet."_ Both brothers were silent for a span of time each knowing that Paul had to tell her before he brought her home to London. Paul decided to break the silence,

_"How're the kids then?"_ Mike was quiet for a moment more before responding,

_"Holly is fine, Da's had her the whole time. William and Ang are inseparable."_ It was quiet for a moment more, _"Lily's… the lass isn't doing too well. She won't eat unless William practically begs 'er to, 'nd she doesn't sleep too well… actually she hasn't really slept at all."_ Paul sighed, the lass was too much like her mum when she was upset,

_"Can you put her on the phone?"_ Paul asked quietly,

_"I can't guarantee you that she'll talk."_ Mike explained,

_"Its fine, put her on."_ He waited a moment, he could hear footsteps, and finally he could hear breathing on the other end.

_"Lily?"_ He waited a moment. He knew she was on, but she wasn't speaking, _"Honey, it's daddy."_ Still no response. _"I miss you loads, do you know that?"_ Paul continued the one sided conversation with himself, _"Yer mummy misses you too, how's William?"_ Paul kept giving her a chance to talk- but there never was an answer, _"Listen honey, you've got to eat 'nd you've got to sleep okay? Listen to yer uncle Mike and William, yes?"_ Paul shut his eyes listening close and hoping for just the smallest sound of her voice, _"I love you lots okay?"_ She didn't answer, Paul doubted for a moment that she was on until he heard the telltale sign of fast breathing and a small sob, _"Oh come 'ead, love. Please don't cry. Mummy and I will be back before you know it!"_ Paul heard more ruffling and Mike's voice came through,

_"She's a bit worked up… probably tired 's all."_ Mike lamely made an excuse. _Yeah… tired_, Paul tried to convince himself. _"I'm goin' to go put her down for a kip, I'll call later."_ And with that his brother hung up. Paul took a moment to himself collecting his thoughts- she'd be okay, Mike was going to handle this. Paul put all other thoughts out of his mind focusing instead on the positive and how great things were going, he got back to the room surprised to find the bed empty. He went out past the bathroom and he could hear the bathtub water running, he knocked,

_"Rachael?"_

_"Yes?"_ Paul chuckled folding his arms and leaning against the door,

_"What're you doing?"_

_"Take a wild guess, pal."_ He chuckled.

_"Cheeky."_ The water stopped and he could hear a little splash, _"What'd you want for brekky?"_

_"Don't care."_ He chuckled and shook his head,

_"Well you're going t' have t' eat up, wench. With all this wanton activity I don't want you t' wear yerself out!"_ He could hear her laughing,

_"Funny."_ With that he smiled to himself and went about preparing breakfast; he chuckled to himself thinking how desperately they both needed to learn how to cook- they couldn't live off of eggs, toast, and sarnies for the rest of their lives.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I finished with my bath quickly and wrapped a towel around myself getting back into the bedroom; I was in search of something warm- this house was way too cold. I rummaged around in my suitcase finding nothing warm enough, then went over to Paul's. I stole an old t-shirt and a pair of sweat pants laughing how funny it was that I was practically swimming in them. Just as I pulled the shirt over my head I felt the most abnormal feeling in my stomach- I suddenly realized it was a baby moving. A sense of déjà came over me, I went over to the mirror pulling up my shirt and poking at my stomach in an interested way.

Paul's P.O.V.

He had brekky ready, Rachael was taking forever! He waited a few odd minutes more before calling to her,

_"Come 'ead Rach, it's getting cold!"_ There was no response. He got up walking over to the bedroom, he knocked, waited, and then entered.

When he entered she was standing in front of the mirror with his old t-shirt raised over the growing little bump, she was staring down at it in surprise. He walked up behind her with a small smile pulling her in front of himself wrapping his arms around her and looking down slightly at her, she leaned back against him,

_"What're you doing, love?"_ She didn't answer; she was still looking down at it with a look of wonder upon her face. He looked down at it as well slipping his hand just around her waist his hand nearly spanning the entire surface of her stomach, he was more than pleased to see the small bump growing and he could no longer see her ribs; he was proud of her for that. Out of nowhere he felt a weird movement under his hand he was a bit shocked, suddenly realizing that it was a baby moving. A smile so wide broke out upon his face he was nearly sure it would split into two.

Paul leaned down, pulling her closer to him and whispering into her ear, _"I'm going t' take care of you. You know that?"_

A smile tugged at her lips, He saw her trying not to blush. He leaned back in and held her even tighter leaning over to kiss the side of her neck, then whispered_ "We made a baby, Rach."_ He chuckled, still feeling the strange movement beneath his hand,_ "I just want you 'nd me 'nd a houseful of little brats."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I couldn't hold back a smile.

_"You like that idea?"_ Paul asked.

_"Yeah, I think so."_

_"So do I."_ he said and the seriousness in his tone brought me back to the moment. The thought crossed my mind about how good things were going. His breath was warm on my neck, his lips just brushing me in a ghost of a kiss.

He kissed me and said, _"Come 'ead and eat then."_

And for the rest of the day we didn't do much. It's funny, but I couldn't remember all that well the things we did talk about or specific conversations Paul and I had, but talking with him was like breathing; indispensable, natural, and effortless. Being with him was the same. Effortless. There was none of the usual arguments or bad feelings between us. Paul had absolutely no reason to try to impress me and I had absolutely no reason to try and impress him. I thought his near total ignorance of knowing how to do household work, a decided preference for "jam butties" and milk, a tendency to bite his nails, and self confessed ignorance of cooking were hilarious. But in total we were both in the same boat, so being with him was just plain easy. It was good. Really good.

Paul's P.O.V.

He loved the way she listened to him, hanging on each and every word he said. Paul felt his heart tumble in his chest as he watched her listen when he spoke she leaned forward a little, her chin in the palm of her hand as she paid complete attention. It made him feel important, and needed, and above all else he never wanted her to look at any other bloke the same way. He was presently telling her about the project they were going to start in the studio when break ended in January. He loved the way she asked sarcastic questions- to which he gave back just as good, and how she laughed. What a pretty laugh she had. He didn't think he had ever felt like this before- they were just really great together.

It was now the afternoon, Rachael was playing with Martha across the room as he sat with his guitar across from them on the couch with a grin on his face. He hadn't felt this incredible in a long time. They hadn't gone out or seen another living soul since London; he liked having her all to himself.

Martha scampered for the ball Rachael had skidded on the floor a few feet away. Rachael turned around and flashed him a smile. She was wearing an old pair of his sweatpants and his old t-shirt knotted at her waist. They were bagging and not particularly attractive but she didn't seem to care. Even in the looseness of her garments he could visualize her body and what it did for him. He had never craved another person so fervently. He put his guitar down and reached forward, she got up and walked over she flopped beside him and rested her head in the crook of his arm. He pulled her onto his lap resting his forehead against hers,

_"You're pretty." _She laughed a little,

_"I know!"_ He pinched her on the side the buried her face against his neck. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, before she pulled away a little reaching for his wrist to take a look at his watch. She read it, he saw her face drop just a tad, and she detangled herself from his arms walking over to the bathroom. He didn't ask any questions he just listened as he heard a pill bottle, the sink running, and then the lights flicking off.

As she came out of the bathroom she gave him a half-hearted smile and a shrug. He reached out for her again, and she came over willingly. Paul knew within minutes she was going to be tired again. He made the best of it, laying down and pulling her to lay on top of himself, he then grabbed a blanket cocooning both of them in it. Once they were situated he rocked just a little, running a hand through her hair, and started making promises to her,

_"It's goin' t' be so great, you know that Rach?"_ She nodded slightly and he watched her eyes staring to flicker despite her best efforts to keep them open,

_"It's just gonna be you, 'nd me, 'nd all those kids, and the dog."_ He chuckled picturing him and Rachael being overthrown by a small army of children, _"You 'nd I are going to have a ball."_ She nodded a little more and Paul pulled her tighter into his chest,_ "Lily 'nd Will are probably going t' be the leaders of it all. Holly 'll hangout with us, because she's my little baby."_ He slid a hand down to her stomach, chuckling picturing what life was going to be like when the thought struck him, _"Wait Rach, have you found out what they're going t' be?"_ He asked quietly, she wrinkled her forehead confusedly, he knew she was almost fully asleep,

_"It's a baby, stupid."_ He chuckled slightly,

_"No, Love, I mean are they girls or boys?"_ She nodded, he knew she was just about to slip away,

_"A boy and a girl."_ Paul was pretty surprised,

_"When did you find that out, love?"_ She yawned a final time, and he nearly felt her body go limp,

_"Last week."_ He nodded and continued to rock, a bit excited, a bit nervous, but overall extremely happy. He continued to make promises for her laying out the future,

_"Right then, so we'll have three girls and two boys._" He chuckled, that sure was a shit-ton of kids, _"And a dog, So there'll be seven of us altogether, eight including Martha."_ He shook her just a bit, to slightly rouse her, _"Hey, whaddya think about moving into my house?"_ She opened her eyes slightly, in a foggy place between consciousness and unconsciousness,

_"Why?"_ She whispered, He ran a hand over her hair, breathing in her scent,

_"My house has two more rooms than yours does."_ It took her a minute but she let out a little laugh,

_"How in the world do you know that?"_ He smiled slightly,

_"I counted."_ He could feel her shaking from laughter,

_"Paul, that's really weird."_ He shrugged his shoulders planting another kiss atop her head,

_"There's another reason for you t' move in, we can be weird together."_ She smiled still laughing a little,

_"Speak for yourself. I'm the most normal person I know, you're a freak."_ He chuckled,

_"It's all for you!"_ She smiled again, he knew he was losing her. _"Hey Rach?"_ Her breathing was rapidly slowing down when she finally breathed out a simple, **'Yeah?'**.

_"Let's be in love, okay?"_ He asked like a child. He waited for an answer she took a breath,

_"Kay."_

He couldn't let her leave now.


	44. Chapter 44

**A/N: So literally I freaking love you all for the reviews and all the hits I got on the story. You guys are fantastic and wonderful. This chappter is super**** duper longish. Love it, Hate it, do what you want. Review it please? I'll love you forever and ever and ever. Deal? Alright, sounds good read it. Have a pretty day.**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He watched her sleep for a while. She had a complete mask of relaxation, she looked so beautiful, you couldn't even detect any of the tragic events she'd gone through, or the illness, or the immense amount of stress and pressure she'd been under. He quietly pecked the tip of her nose, smiling to himself- she belonged to him, and he had a pretty little slip of bird to call his own. He watched her for a stretch longer thinking; sometimes not thinking; but just holding her tightly not ever wanting to let go.

He didn't notice but he had fallen asleep, he'd woken up to Rachael shifting and letting out a yawn. He kissed the side of her cheek while rubbing his eyes,

_"Sleep good?"_ He asked yawning, she nodded still regaining awareness of the environment around herself. Paul threw an arm around her waist pulling her close in effort to wakeup a bit more himself. Once again he felt that strange movement beneath his hand, shocking him into full consciousness.

Rachael looked down at her stomach, raising an eyebrow then laughing, before looking up at him,

_"It's really weird."_ She crackled, _"It's like I ate people and they're wiggling around."_ Paul chuckled at her attempt at describing it. Paul continued moving his hand over the bump still thoroughly amazed, before a thought struck him,

_"Hey Rach?"_ She looked up at him raising an eyebrow, _"When do you think that we should tell people?"_ She looked thoughtful for a minute or two, before shrugging,

_"I guess when I start getting really chubby."_ She answered completely monotone. He looked at her for a moment, he saw a slight movement of her trying not to laugh pull at her lips. He busted out laughing pinching her on the side and pulling her onto his lap,

_"You're an idiot, Rachael."_ He chuckled, she shrugged looking amused. She rolled her eyes laughing, it took them a while to calm down before he spoke again, _"But no, really, love. When?"_ She sighed shrugging,

_"I don't know. What do you think?"_ Paul pondered on it for a moment,

_"People are going t' start asking questions soon enough, 'nd they'll be suspicious 'nd even further up our asses if we don't say something about it."_ He bit the inside of his cheek, _"But- if we deny it, people are goin' to get suspicious when we start walking around with five kids instead of three."_ She laughed lightly going along with it,

_"We could do that!"_ He shook his head with a smile, pulling her tighter into himself.

_"Think about it, alright?"_ She nodded and he sat up placing her to his side, _"I'm going t' go take a bath."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I yawned and stretched some more. Martha made an appearance, coming from the \kitchen and looking up at me expectantly. I scratched her ears giving her a kiss on the head, whilst she wiggled her backend in response. I played with her some thinking how good it had been, and that maybe I could get along quite well with Paul. He was funny, and caring, but also a bit of an overbearing know-it-all- I didn't mind in the least, I think I was in love.

Paul's P.O.V.

He scrubbed off in the bath, feeling extremely content in the moment until it came rushing back to him. This wasn't going to last forever- she didn't know about Dot. He groaned, why did he have to think so bloody much? She finally trusted him, and was close with him and he had to go and piss it all away. He decided he needed to make her his own no matter what the consequences, for this week was going to have to last him for a lifetime, and he wasn't going to miss a moment of it.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I was sitting with a magazine on my lap reading on the couch when Paul came in wearing only a bathrobe hanging open down the front. I looked up towards him, he pulled me up off the couch tugging the magazine from my grasp and tossing it to the side, while he roughly tugged open the button-down shirt roughly kissing his way down. I was surprised but nonetheless accepted it. I was even more surprised when he scooped me up walking back into the bedroom where he deposited me on the dresser. Already hard, he pushed close to me and started to enter me while he aggressively kissed and fondled me. This new forcefulness and aggressiveness making me tingle all over. Half pain, half pleasure. He bit my neck as he completed his plunge deep inside.

Paul's P.O.V.

He felt the need to claim her and mark her as his territory. He grabbed her bottom in both hands and pulled her even closer allowing him to fully slam in and out. Within minutes she came, he himself waited a second before he stiffened and moaned as he came, filling her with his warm wetness. He was still amazed at the intensity he felt each time with her. Truly they were meant to be, why couldn't the world give him a fucking break for once?

They stayed there, for a while, entwined. Paul held her tightly, afraid to let go; still catching his breath. She spoke first,

_"What the hell was that?"_ He gave a breathless chuckle,

_"You're me girl, I get t' touch you whenever I want."_ She laughed a little shaking her head while he pulled into her leaning over for another kiss before he whispered,

_"Who's yer favorite Beatle now?"_

_"John Lennon."_ He groaned pinching her on the bum and lifting her off the dresser, tugging her over to the bed,

_"You're exasperating, love!"_ She smiled a little with sleep suddenly coming over the both of them.

.

The next time he woke up, it was to the phone ringing, he quickly hopped out of bed walking swiftly into the front room to grab it,

_"Hello?"_

_"It's Alistair. The press is on the brink of pulling a nutty. I think it's time you got back to London."_ Paul felt panicked;

_"How bad is it?"_ He could hear men talking in the background, there wasn't a doubt that he was in the studio,

_"It's about to get bad, I've set up a meeting with a lawyer to discuss our options."_ Paul's head began pounding.

_"When should I be back?"_

_"As absolutely soon as possible, the quicker we knock this, the better."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I rolled out of bed, still half asleep, I could hear Paul talking on the phone, I needed something to drink. I opened the door slightly, when I heard:

_"I don't want Langley. He can't keep his mouth shut. Get one of the others."_ He listened to whoever was on the telephone, then said, _"Come on, Alistair. You, know damn well they'll go to the press if I don't acknowledge it, and I'll be damned if I'll do that… No, I want this done. It's been six years, it needs t' be dropped."_

By the time he hung up I knew he was more than angry. He looked furious and very upset. I quietly walked into the room, something definitely wasn't right. He put the phone down and looked at me with a surprised expression on his face.

_"What's wrong?"_ I asked.

He didn't answer, just looked at me, or, more accurately, through me. I waited, unsure what to do. Finally he came around,_ "I thought you were sleeping?"_

I shrugged, starting to get a little confused. _"I woke up."_ He studied me for a moment, I raised an eyebrow. Paul came walking over with his arms held out pulling me into his arms,

_"I forgot t' say good morning."_ This made me even more confused but nonetheless I accepted it,

_"Good morning."_ He chuckled I laughed a bit rolling my eyes, he pecked me on the lips.

We spent the rest of the morning hanging out, he looked distracted; I didn't feel like asking- he'd tell me if it was important or wanted me to know, besides that, it wasn't any of my business.

_"Hey Rach!"_ I looked over at him realizing he had been talking to me and I had been daydreaming, _"What were you thinkin' about?"_ I shrugged laughing,

_"Nothing. I really don't know."_ He shook his head with a **'god help me'** look and tossed Martha's ball at me. I caught it and tossed it on the floor to the dog who skidded after it landing on her furry bottom and sliding even further across the room. I had taken those pills minutes ago, and I was beginning to slowly slip away into sleep. I frowned, I didn't like being tired so often, I missed so much of the day. Paul came over putting a hand on my waist,

_"What's wrong?"_ I looked at the pill bottle on the counter, he caught what I was getting at and he pulled me up into his arms,

_"Remember, all you have t' do is get better."_ I nodded a little, _"I know it sucks, but we'll get through this, yeah?"_ I nodded feeling a slight bit better and a lot more tired. "So go lie down, 'nd I'll be in a mo, yes?"

_"Paul you don't have to-"_ He cut me off,

_"Rach, I want to. Go lay down miss, remember I'm in charge."_ I laughed, walking into the bedroom, flopping down on the bed. Immediately sleep claimed me, taking me out of perception.

Paul's P.O.V.

He let the dog out again, feeling like a right shit. How the fuck was he going to explain this? She'd finally been able to relax and they got along famously in and out of bed, and now what the hell, he had to explain that he got Dot knocked up and when she miscarried he left, how awful did that sound? He got into the bedroom where she was passed out cold and crawled into bed situating himself laying next to her propped up on one elbow, he kissed her cheek making his way down to her lips then pulled her into his side nestling her in the crook of his neck.

_"I'm so sorry, love."_ He apologized to a sleeping Rachael, _"It's different this time around, I didn't want Dot. I want you like mad, though. I want you and those crazy kids. I want us."_ He whispered.

**Why did it have to end?**

He wasn't going to let it end. He ran a hand over the tiny bump under her shirt, there wasn't a chance in hell he was going to let her leave.

An hour or two passed before the telephone ringing brought him out of his trance he had fixed upon her sleeping form. He got up to the front room answering it,

_"'Lo?"_

_"The papers in New York are about to catch on, what do you want to do?"_ It was Alistair again, Paul felt completely numb,

_"Options?"_ He managed to croak out,

_"You can deny it."_ He cringed,

_"How?"_

_"We can get a lawyer. They can find a loophole, and get it out of the papers."_ He nodded into the phone,

_"Do that."_ He jumped a foot in the air when Rachael came out of the bedroom, she smiled a little; she looked dead tired. She looked at the phone, looked at him and shrugged walking past him to the kitchen to get a drink of water.

_"Alright. Warn your family. Things might get ugly."_ He took a shaky breath in,

_"Thanks, Alistair."_ He hung up walking over to the couch with a sudden headache and heartache forming. Now was the time he had to tell her.

_"I'm a bastard."_ He muttered to himself. Rachael walked in,

_"You're a what?"_ He looked up to her reaching out a hand, pulling her close.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Paul was acting strangely. It really gave me a horrible feeling, he sighed again looking at me with the most heart wrenching look I'd ever seen,

_"I'm a bastard."_ He repeated for me, I raised an eyebrow now completely confused.

_"You aren't a bastard,"_ I reassured him. _"You're a nice guy."_ I was still sitting next to him. Instead of the smile I expected, a shadow passed over his face. He reached up and put his arm around me, slid his hand up into my hair, and pulled my head down onto his shoulder. As I huddled up against him he said, _"No. I'm not."_

I didn't know what to say to that. I wondered what he was thinking of, what memory of something he had done that wasn't nice.

Paul's P.O.V.

He sighed and looked down at her, at this moment he hated himself.

_"Rach..."_ She looked up studying his face. He looked deeply into her eyes. Those dark, black eyes with the amber ring that distinguished the pupil from the rest. "You're going to hate me." he said quietly. She sat up a little clearly confused, she put a hand on his arm. Those delicate china doll hands.

_"Why would I hate you?"_ She asked quizzically. He took her hand in his own giving it a kiss then bringing it up to his face pressing his cheek against it.

_"I've done some things... Some things that I'm not particularly proud of."_ she was staring at him still clearly confused._ "I... I made a mistake."_ He went on to tell her how he had met Dot, and how they were dating before getting to the main point. _"Well Dot-"_ he didn't want to say it, _"Dot got pregnant."_ by now Rachael had pulled her hand out of his grip while staring at him with a completely blank expression. "She ended up losing the baby about two months in." He shut his eyes, _"And I have t' tell you this because she sold the story t' the papers."_ She studied him for a moment as if she didn't believe him,

_"How long have you known?"_ He looked down the floor,

_"I found out in Liverpool."_ He mumbled quietly. She shook her head slightly,

_"So you're telling me that you got this Dot girl pregnant. And she lost the baby. And you left her?"_ He shook his head,

_"Rach, I didn't leav-"_ She cut him off,

_"You left her."_ She stood up from the couch, he immediately shot up as well,

_"No, love you've got it all wrong-"_ He saw the look she gave him and was stunned to say the absolute least,

_"You left her."_ He tried reaching out for her, she instantly stepped back,

_"Love, listen, I can explain."_ She looked absolutely furious, heartbroken, stunned, and livid- all at the same time.

_"No. You don't have to."_ He reached out for her again, she backed up and suddenly stalked off towards the bathroom locking the door. Paul raced over, he could hear the sounds of her getting sick.

**What the hell had he just done?**

_"Rachael, baby, come out, we need t' talk."_ Again he heard her get sick, and a few minutes later a flush, and the sink running, the door flung open and she pushed past him,

_"I'm-"_ She shook her head going for her boots and a coat, _"I'm going for a walk."_ Paul instantly tried sidestepping her to which she instantly and skillfully avoided throwing on the coat fastening it tightly around her waist whilst pulling on a pair of boots,

_"No, Rach. It's way too cold outside."_ She looked at him shooting him the most disappointed, irritated look he'd ever seen.

_"I honestly don't care. I'll be back."_ She whistled and the dog came faithfully over to her as she opened the door and stepped out.

He watched the door slam and immediately went to the window, watching her steadily disappear farther into the property laden with snow.

A feeling of loss and an intense anger flashed as he turned around reaching for the vase on the mantle of the fireplace. He'd never cared much for this vase, and now it was a channel for his anger, he thoroughly smashed it across the wooden floor hoping for some kind of satisfaction. There was none. He glanced out the window. He could still see her slender form and the dog bounding through the snow beside her. She was standing still on a hill, and Paul couldn't even fathom what was going on. He himself tugged on a pair of boots not even bothering to grab a jacket before stomping outside after her.

Rachael's P.O.V.

What had just happened? Here I was thinking how good it was and there he was lying to me. And that whole 'Dot thing' made me sick to my stomach. The flood of emotions I'd experienced was the most intense thing I'd ever felt. I was currently standing outside. On the hill. With the dog. Thinking. Why did it have to go like this every time? Why couldn't we just have one thing go right for us? I was furious with Paul I was absolutely convinced he was the lowest form of scum on earth. It suddenly hit me all at once. Here I was thinking how great life was going to be, and that I was pregnant, and that we were finally getting along. How stupid was I? The icy wind bit at my cheeks that now had a few tears sliding down them. Martha had bounded about ten feet up ahead of me plowing through the snow.

Paul's P.O.V.

He trudged up the hill, with the icy wind blowing right through him, to the top of the hill where Rachael was. He couldn't comprehend what was going on, he watched at a ten foot distance her figure facing away from him, he could tell she was crying a little bit, he'd broken her. He walked up to her reaching out when she finally turned around,

_"Come 'ere, love."_ He came close and put his arms around her, pulling her to him. She couldn't bear to have him touch her and started pushing him away, crying hysterically. _"Stop!"_ he demanded, holding her tighter.

_"Let me go!"_ she cried, pushing at him, hitting his chest.

_"I won't. Hit me all you want. I'm not letting go."_ He had his arms wrapped around her form, _"I'm not gonna lose you again, Rachael. I love you too much t' watch this happen again."_

_"You don't love me!"_

_"Don't you ever say that, do you hear? Ever! Think of what I went through for you. Think I would put meself through that for just anyone?"_ He roared just as loud.

There was a large rock at the back of Rachael's feet and she slipped down and out of his arms, sitting on the rock, crying her heart out, Paul couldn't think straight. He kneeled down in front of her, holding tightly onto her thighs.

_"Listen to me,"_ he said. _"Look at me, Rachael!"_ He gripped her shoulders. _"Honey, you didn't give me a chance t' explain meself. You've got t' listen to me."_

She shook her head and stood back up, pushing past him, she started making her way towards the house, she whistled sharply. Martha came immediately to her heels following her faithfully. Paul couldn't see straight. He followed her back into the house. She was absolutely livid. Just as he got into the door, the house was warm and as picturesque as it should have been. There was a fire still going, the dishes were washed; it was cozy. The radio was still playing he heard it, he heard their song. Rachael must've heard it too because she appeared walking swiftly out of the bedroom and took hold of the radio.

She slammed it on the floor the same as he had smashed the vase. The two of their tempers combined was absolutely lethal. The radio bust apart. She turned around and gave him a death glare as she stalked back into the bedroom. Paul followed her, as he walked into the bedroom memories flooded back to him- first Hamburg, then Greece, now here. He sure as hell wasn't going to let it happen. She was whipping things into her case, still absolutely furious. He walked swiftly up to the bag and tried pulling it away, she pulled back. It wasn't much of a fight, he easily outweighed her and beat her in the strength and height category.

_"Give me my suitcase!"_ She said venomously. He shook his head,

_"No, yer not leaving!"_ She stopped pulling the bag and let him have it. She stomped out past him into the front room. He dumped and threw the bag down and followed her out. She was gathering up her belongings that had made residence in the house. He walked up to her trying to take the magazines and such out of her arms, she wouldn't have it. She pushed past him back into the bedroom she was re-stuffing everything he had dumped out back into it. Paul knelt down trying to block her hands,

_"Really mature, Paul. Knock it off."_ Paul shook his head,

_"Rachael, you can be mad 'nd shout all you bloody well want but there's no way in hell you're leaving. You've left twice already."_ She just scrunched her nose,

_"Third time must be the charm then."_ She went back to trying to stuff things in her suitcase he tried to block her, but she was too quick. She stood back up walking over to the phone and she began dialing, he swiftly pulled the cord out of the wall. She still had tears running down her face,

_"Just stop, Paul."_

_"Rachael. Love. You have t' listen t' my bleedin' side of the story."_ Rachael's eyebrows rose as she thumbed herself in the chest,

_"I have to? I have to listen to your side of the story? No, Paul I already know your side of the story."_ She had her fists clenched and they were standing toe to toe, _"You messed up and people know now. This isn't my fault, it's yours."_ He shook his head,

_"Sweetheart, this isn't your fault, no one ever said it was Dot was-"_ She cut him off,

_"Don't you dare call me sweetheart you bastard. Fuck Dot-."_ She stopped herself, _"Oh, excuse me, YOU ALREADY DID!"_ She went back to the bedroom.

His world was spinning, he had an immense amount of anger and guilt built up. He walked up to the wall and hit it as hard as he could. He cracked the plaster, he went at it again ignoring the blood on his knuckles. And again. And again. He continued slamming into the wall. **One** for John. **One** for Yoko. **One** for the bloody Beatles. **One** for this… 'thing' he and Rachael had that was falling apart. **One** for his past. **One** for the guilt. **One** for the mistakes. **One** for everyone he had lost. **One** for everyone he had screwed over. And just to top it off- **One** for himself. He stopped still seething and examined the damage. He'd done a job of it, he then inspected the knuckles on his left hand, already bruising; his ring finger completely cut up, a cavernous slice in it. He stared at it for a while. He could still hear Rachael throwing things into her bag. He took a deep breath walking into the bedroom. He watched for a moment as she continued packing- thoroughly ignoring him.

Rachael's P.O.V.

He turned away from me and walked over to the dresser, putting his hands on it and leaning from the waist like a boxer who had just taken a concrete punch to the stomach. Well, I was winding up with the knockout punch. Timing is everything in the fight; I waited until he straightened up and turned around to look at me. As he opened his mouth for the apology that was too late, I hit him with it.

_"I'm **not** going to hang around and be the next Dorothy Rhone, you stupid fuck."_

Whatever he was going to say was gone. He stood there, looking at me with no words left. His face froze, jaw clenched in a look that conveyed both rage and embarrassment. He stomped out of the room. I got up, staggered to the bed and curled up on the foot of it crying.

I didn't hear him come back into the room. He was suddenly there, patting my back making soothing sounds. _"Easy, Honey. There, there Love. I can explain—"_

_"Just leave!"_ I choked out. My voice was hoarse from crying. I turned away and buried my face in the bed spread. I couldn't stand to look at him. "Just go away."

He ignored me. _"Rachael,"_ he said, _"I have done a few things in my life that I am not particularly proud of, but Dot… Christ. She 'nd I had problems but that… that's the one thing I never wanted you to find out about me."_ As he talked the regret and dejected shame in his voice pulled at me. It was impossible not to feel something, and I buried myself even further into the mattress attempting to silence him.

_"I was such a dick, I actually thought I had the right... that Dot was..."_ He groaned. _"Shit,"_ he muttered. _"Knowing all that ...that horrible stuff."_

The words hung in the air between us. Why was he still talking? I couldn't take any more of this. I didn't want to fight anymore. _"See you then."_ I said getting up and grabbing my suitcase.

_"No."_ he said firmly, tenaciously. _"Listen to—"_

_"No."_ I said, pulling away from him and sitting up. _"I'm not going to listen to any more lies."_

_"Rachael, baby, stop—"_

He was reaching for me and I jerked away continuing my walk. If he wouldn't leave, I would have to. I didn't know where I thought I would go, I just knew I couldn't stand being near him, but when I tried to get up, he grabbed my wrist.

_"Let go!"_ I yelled. _"I am not going to listen to you! Just get out of here, get out of my life!"_

_"Rachael, I never lied to you!"_

_"No you never said 'Gee I'm glad you didn't lose the twins so I could leave you.'"_ He flinched visibly, and I went on, _"You also didn't say 'I got another girl pregnant and left her' did you?"_ I was on my feet, struggling to get away from him as I shouted at him. _"But you sure as hell let me believe that! That's a lie Paul, get it straight."_

_"Listen to me—,"_

_"Let go of me!"_

_"Listen to me!"_ He was on his feet now, trying to pull me back to him.

"_No! Get out of here!"_

_"Damn it, Rachael, listen to me!"_ he roared. The sound enormously echoed in the small room and I winced.

He saw that and let go abruptly. _"Oh, God."_ he said and he sounded awful.

I was worn out, too exhausted to fight. I sat back down on the bed, drained, empty inside. Again. Tears rolled down my face, burning like acid. I didn't want to hear, didn't want to listen, and didn't want to go on with this any longer. I wanted to just leave and get on without him.

I sat there, eyes closed to shut out the light, to shut out Paul, but with my eyes closed I heard what I hadn't heard before. **Silence.**

Paul's P.O.V.

It was a game of hurt. He had hurt her, and she felt she needed to leave. Both of their temper's were flaring; Rachael was creative in remarks when she was mad, and she was just as loud- if not entirely louder than he was. She certainly had a set of pipes on her. He had never heard a person shout that loud. He sat on the bed just looking at her, she was crying into her hands.

_"Sweetheart, just let me say my part."_ She slowly shook her head,

_"Don't call me that. I'm not your sweetheart, I'm not your love, I'm not your girl."_ His head was aching, _"I'm just Rachael. Nothing more than that."_ It was his turn to shake his head. He got up and knelt before her, he held onto her hands that were in her lap, she struggled a bit but eventually gave up,

_"No. You know you're more than that, you're my love. You're my girl. You're the mum of me kids."_ He kissed her hands, _"You're not going to walk out on me again. I fucked up, I know it."_ He shook his head, _"I know you hate me, but I don't want t' do this alone, 'nd I know you can't do this alone."_ She ripped her hands away, standing up.

_"I can and I will do it alone. Cynthia's done it alone, and as a matter of fact I think she's doing a pretty good job at it."_ He stood up looking at her,

_"Rachael, this is nothing like John and Cyn's situation."_ She spun around crossing her arms,

_"It's exactly like it. Maureen's told me everything that happened between them. Everything."_

_"You can't fucking compare me t' John."_ He said coldly feeling the sting of her words, she raised an eyebrow.

_"I can't? Guess what- I just did. And stop telling me I can't do things, you're not in charge of me. You have no claim on me whatsoever, you're absolutely nothing to me."_ He ignored the last part of it still hung up on the first part of it,

_"John doesn't want the same things as I do, he left Julian and Cyn. If anything you're more like him."_ She shook her head,

_"I'm not leaving my kids."_ He huffed,

_"Well neither am I."_ She nodded.

_"They're not even yours."_ He couldn't believe what she was saying.

_"Rachael they're as much mine as they are yours."_ She shook her head again,

_"No, Paul. Lillian is half yours if anything."_ Paul crossed his arms,

_"No, Rachael. Holly, William and Lillian are all half mine. And newsflash, darling- I got you knocked up, so those two are half mine as well."_ She put up a hand to silence him.

_"Just—"_ She stopped and sighed, _"Just save it for someone who cares, I don't anymore."_ She looked absolutely defeated. Paul's heart had sunk to his stomach. He couldn't leave it there.

"I'm going back home." She said quietly. He shook his head, she held up a hand to silence him. She didn't seem angry anymore; just completely fed up, "Yes I am. We can switch off with Lillian." His throat tightened, _"I guess—"_ Rachael was trying to put it together in her head, _"We'll just take turns every couple of days." _He felt a tear escape down his cheek he swiped quickly at it.

_"What about-"_ She cut him off, she already knew that he was going to ask about William and Holly.

_"They aren't yours, so just… no."_ Paul's eyes trailed down to her stomach, 6 and a half more months. She put her hand on the growing bump, "And when the other two come… we'll switch off then too."

_"Rachael, you bloody well know that that's no way fer a kid to grow up."_ She shrugged,

_"It's the way it is though."_ He put a hand to his forehead,

_"Rachael, love, that's not right. We can't just hand off kids t' each other every over day- they should all be together."_ She wiped at her eyes,

_"So it'll be Lily and the other two, William and Holly stay with me."_ His head was aching, this couldn't be happening.

_"No, I mean that all five of 'em should be together."_

_"Three of them are half yours. The other two are not. It's that simple."_ She said coldly. He pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration,

_"No, it's not that bloody simple."_ She took a deep breath swiping at her tears,

_"It's not my fault."_ The words struck him like a knife to the heart. There she was standing in tears with her suitcase in one hand and leaving him completely miserable. She walked out past him into the front room. He watched her walk away. He put a hand up to his mouth. It took him a few moments to even come back to reality.  
He pulled a few things he wanted to take home into his small suitcase taking a last look around the room. The sheets were still ruffled, where they had made love. She had left a bottle of nail polish she didn't care about on the bedside table- but it was so feminine, a small touch of Rachael that should've always been around him.

Her feminine things that were small compared to his, miniscule in comparison- it reminded him how lovely it was to wake up with the sheets smelling of perfume, and how she had a distinct way of cleaning that he himself was never very good at, or how she had all her outfits and her shoes and her jewelry all of which were womanly in style- how right it felt to have all of her belongings alongside his own belongings.

Paul walked back out to the front room. She was staring at the radio she had broken, his eyes trailed to the vase he had broken. Martha had made her appearance back at Rachael's side. Rachael wasn't aware of his presence in the room, she knelt down hugging the dog around her neck. Paul leaned against the doorframe just watching her. After a while Rachael let go kissing the top of the dog's head. She walked over to the phone plugging it back in, and started dialing. Paul made his move walking over to her shaking his head,

_"Rach. I'll take you back t' London."_ She closed her eyes for a long moment then opened them looking up at him, she was about to say something but he got to it first, _"Just do it for me, okay. We can go pick up the kids together. And besides…"_

Rachael's P.O.V.

I knew what he was getting at, the press was going to go nuts. I was done. Was it sick to say I wanted to die at this very moment? I just wanted to end it, and for that I was truly sick. He was still looking at me.

I slowly shook my head returning to try and dial the phone. I couldn't hear a dial tone; I examined the cord hanging out the back. I suppose in the heat of our argument he had broken it because the wire had its spindles separated away. We both stared at it for a long moment. He tried to put a hand on my shoulder, I immediately shrugged it off, I felt sick to my stomach again. I quickly turned around and pushed past him to the bathroom getting violently sick again.

Paul's P.O.V.

She pushed past him into the bathroom. She slammed the door and within seconds he could hear the telltale signs of her illness. He was at a loss for words as well as thought. He stood next the door with his head pressed against it, he hated that she took her grief physically. After a few minutes she had quieted down and he knocked,

_"Rach, love. Come on out."_ He couldn't hear any sound- almost as if there wasn't anyone there and he was talking to himself, he knocked again. _"Love, you're sick 'nd that's not okay. Please come out."_ He heard the sink running for a long while, and after a bit there was silence again. _"Rach, if you're not coming out, I'm coming in."_ Idle threat and fair warning bound into one- but yet there was still no answer. Paul sighed and tried jiggling the door handle; which of course was locked. He trailed back out towards the table where she had left her purse; he dug around the bottom instantly finding a loose hairpin. He got back to the door and tried shoving the metal piece into the lock- it would not budge. He kept at it for a while, it wouldn't open the way had back home in London. He stuffed the pin back into his pocket knocking again, _"Love, you've got to let me in. I need t' know you're okay."_ After a moment or so he could hear tear-filled, heartbreaking, laughter,

_"Yeah, of course I'm fine. It's not like I'm fucking pregnant or anything."_ He closed his eyes,

_"Please come out."_ A few minutes later the door swung slowly open he put at arm out holding onto the other side of the doorframe. She stopped short looking at the barrier that was his arm and then visibly noticed his hand. She for a long moment she looked at it; it was oozing blood and had already formed into deep splotches of black and purpling bruises.

She then looked up at him. No words were spoken. He could see the hurt on her face… how much it reminded him of Jane when she caught him- forget that. He couldn't let it end like this,

_"Rach…"_ He didn't even know where to begin.

_"I trusted you."_ She said quietly swallowing, _"I really thought it was going to be different this time around."_ Rachael bit her lip and looked at the floor, _"You really think you know a person."_ She bit back.

_"Love, it doesn't have to end like this, lemme just explain-"_ She shook her head quickly,

_"It's going to end like this. I can't keep doing this."_ He raised an eyebrow,

_"Doing what?"_

"This whole thing where you and I go back and forth, being together and then not. It's not good for either of us." He tried stepping forward to pull her into a hug, she calmly took a step back and put up her hands in protest.

_"Rach, I was a daft bastard. It's not like before. I'm crazy about you, 'nd this whole Dot thing,"_ He watched her visibly flinch,_ "It's nothing t' me. She was nothing t' me, you're everything. I don't think you even get how much I love you, do you?"_

_"You don't do this to people you love, Paul."_ With that she ducked down under his arm walking over to the table, where she picked up her bags, Martha who blatantly had been hiding from their row, reappeared at her side. She ruffled the dogs' head and stroked her ears. She finally turned back around,

_"I want to go home."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

We got into his car, I ignored him as best as I could focusing my attention outside the window. More than once he had stopped the car and just looked at me. It was dead silent, and I ignored him thoroughly- I couldn't believe this was happening. I trusted him, and admittedly I was beginning to think about a life with him, and how I'd actually like it. But now… I couldn't think straight. You didn't do this to people you loved- I just… couldn't.

It was the second time he had stopped the car, pulling over to the side of the road,

_"Baby, I-"_ I quickly shook my head scooting farther towards the window. After a few moments the engine roared back to life and the scenery whizzed by.

Around 4 hours into the drive I felt a tear slide down my cheek- I quickly swiped it away. I muffled a sob quickly feeling everything crash down around me, Paul reached over. Quickly shrugged it away,

_"Rach, please don't-"_ And with that I folded my arms even tighter across my chest,

_"Save it for someone who gives a shit."_ Paul pulled over to the side of the road quickly. He leaned his head against the steering wheel,

_"Rach, please don't cry. I hate seeing you upset."_ He pleaded. I scoffed,

_"Excuse me, Paul. I'll try harder to make it easier for you."_

_"Love, I didn't mean it like that."_

_"Whatever."_ He looked at me once more, I leaned my head against the window feeling ill again. He reached out a hand to place on my side, I pulled it off like it was a piece of trash and deposited it away from me.

_"Rach, just look at me."_ And so I complied staring blankly at him, he grimaced,_ "Are you feeling better?"_ I continued to stare blankly at him. After a minute or two, he tried again, _"Well?"_ I turned my attention back out of the window ignoring him. It was silent for a few more minutes before he reached out grabbing my arm tugging at it slightly. I used all my strength to keep my arms folded but he tugged even harder pulling it from the fold and held on tight,

_"Knock it off, Paul."_ I said closing my eyes in frustration.

_"Love, just—"_ I immediately cut him off,

_"Do not call me that. I'm Rachael. That's it."_ He ignored my words,

_"Love, come on just look at me, give me something."_ I furrowed my eyebrows together,

_"I told you not to call me that. And I don't owe you anything. Stop it."_ He slid closer on the seat, and I ripped my arm away from his grasp and immediately unclasped the lock on the door stepping out. He bolted right out after me,

_"Where th' __hell do you think you're going?"_ He asked. I rolled my eyes reaching back for my purse, and tightening my coat from the wind.

_"Anywhere that you're not."_ I spotted a building that seemed to be a road stop about a quarter of a mile ahead. I'd figure the walk would only take me a few minutes. I started away, he came up to my side,

_"So how long do you think it'll take us to walk there?"_ He questioned nonchalantly. I stopped, shooting a look at him, I knew this trick; I used it with Lily- going along with whatever she did when she knew she was doing something wrong until she stopped- but it was different in my case. I wasn't wrong. I looked up at the sky wondering what I had done to deserve this kind of life, he pointed back to the car,

_"Rach. You're not walking there. It is too cold. You are sick. And It's too far for you."_ I rolled my eyes. Once again the anger replacing the sadness, I felt nauseous again, biting my lip and looking down at the snow, _"See. You are sick. Get back in the car now."_ I shot him a **'you have to be kidding me'** look, he sighed putting a hand to his forehead, _"I'm not going t' bloody argue with you. Go get into the car."_ I closed my eyes for a second and surprisingly did what I was told. He got back in the car as well, starting it up and driving again. We were about 2 minutes away from the rest stop when I said,

"_Drop me off there."_ He looked at me like I was crazy,

_"Why?"_ I closed my eyes in frustration.

_"Because I said so."_ He glanced over at me,

_"That's hardly a reason, love."_

_"But it's a better reason than you probably gave Dot for leaving, huh?"_ I shot back immediately. He looked like I had hit him below the belt. It was true though.

_"Love, you never let me explain."_ I finally threw my hands up in frustration as he sped past the rest stop,

_"Fine. Go ahead and explain."_ He glanced at me as if to ask if I was sure, I shrugged my shoulders with an expectant look on my face, he pulled over to the side of the road for the third time,

_"Just listen okay?"_ I rolled my eyes in ever-growing frustration,

_"I'm sitting here, talk before I change my mind."_ He shook his head,

_"Not what I meant. I mean don't run off, that's not safe."_ I rolled my eyes leaning back against the door of the car,

_"I didn't come here for a safety lecture."_ He closed his eyes, not knowing what to say._ "Well?"_ I asked, getting more irritated by the silence. He calmly spoke up,

_"I messed up. I was young. I was too young. It was before I met you."_

_"Paul, you know that's a dumb excuse."_ He shook his head,

_"Remember the night I met Lily? Remember how you said we were too young, and it wouldn't of been fair?"_ A sudden realization hit me and he continued, _"It's th' same for Dot. We were even younger, hell, I don't think she even wanted it."_ I looked slightly out the front window with the sudden understanding seeping in, _"She 'nd I had problems, Rach. I didn't even like 'er. I tried t' break up with her 'nd then she told me she was pregnant. So o' course I stuck around, but after she lost it, I… I don't know. I left. I had better things t' do."_ I closed my eyes for a long moment listening to the silence, and a tear escaped down my cheek.

_"Aw Rach, come 'ead, love. There's no need t' be upset."_ I shook my head,

"Paul do you even know how unfair this is?" He sighed heavily,

_"I know it is. 'Nd I know I put you in a difficult spot, but you've got t' understand, love- I never wanted t' hurt you. If anything I wanted t' take care of you."_ I leaned farther back into the seat crossing my arms.

_"So if I would've lost the twins, you wouldn't have stuck around, would you?"_ I asked trying to still figure things out,

"_Rach, love, no! Don't even think that for a second. Remember I asked you t' marry me right before we went t' Greece, I obviously want t' be with you."_ I rolled my eyes,

_"Don't remind me."_ I mumbled he sighed leaning back into his side of the seat as well, he must've heard what I had said,

_"Why wouldn't I remind you? I've asked you four times already."_ He looked over at me, _"'Nd I'm going t' ask you again. Will you marry me?"_ I shot him the best look I could muster despite the tears.

_"You really think that I am going to say yes?"_ He shrugged running a hand through his hair,

_"I'd like you t' say yes."_ He said quietly.

_"Do you know how messed up that is?"_ I said coldly suddenly becoming angry.

_"What's messed up?"_

_"Everything!"_ I said busting up into full fledged tears again, _"I left when I had Lily. It was supposed to end there. We weren't supposed to run into each other. Tessa wasn't supposed to die and leave William. Kelley wasn't supposed to go fucking A.W.O.L and leave Holly. I wasn't supposed to get pregnant. And we aren't supposed to be here! We're not supposed to be together! Stop acting like everything is okay when it's not!"_ The words came pouring out of my mouth, Paul quickly reached out an arm for me, I intentionally moved farther back, _"Please don't touch me."_ I said quietly wiping at my tears with the sleeve of my shirt. Ignoring my words as he always did he reached for my hand pulling it into his and holding on tightly, I honestly didn't have the energy to pull away,

_"Rach, you need t' stop beating yerself up about all this. Things happened the way it happened 'nd we can't change that."_ He was looking me straight in the eye now, _"And I know it sucks. 'Nd I know you've had a rough couple of months but remember how good it was the past couple of days? That can be us for always."_ I took in what he had to say for a moment before coming to a sudden realization,

_"This isn't what we're even fighting about."_ I mumbled, Paul held a little tighter onto my hand,

_"What'd you say, love?"_ I was pissed off enough as it was at him, and I hated that he was still trying to get on with it and avoiding the subject wholly,

_"I said, this isn't what we're even fighting about. I still can't believe you left her."_ He closed his eyes letting out a breath and in that moment I pulled my hand away.

_"I want to go home."_ I repeated.

Paul's P.O.V

How much those words had hurt him when she said that in Greece. How much it killed him about what he did and what was happening. He couldn't believe he had hurt her this much, he was in for it now. He glanced back over at her. Her face was completely pale, her eyes were as dark as ever, and she was getting sick again. Because of him. He finally gave in just a bit. Sure, he'd take her home. Maybe it'd make her happy. Maybe she would get better on the trip home by some miracle. Maybe the whole Dot situation would magically disappear.

**Maybe.**

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**A/N: WOW THAT WAS LONG! I don't know how many of you actually read the entire thing, you have a fantastic attention span if you did, so kudos to you! Review it, tell me whatcha think!**


	45. Chapter 45

**A/N: So you guys and I need to have a little chat. I think I'm in love with you... I'm not even joking that your reviews made me cry. Especially Silver's. Oh and I also appreciate the PM's I've been getting with ideas and suggestions- they really do help a lot. Especially the one's suggesting words and lines I should put it. Alright, you've got me crying all over my keyboard again- Stop making me an emotional sot and enjoy!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He pulled up to his dad's house around 4 in the afternoon. Rachael got out of the car without waiting for him. He let Martha out and trailed his way to the front door.

He got inside and heard William talking,

_"Mum we played in the snow!"_ He heard Rachael laughing- he knew it was an act. He went to the direction of the voices,

"_'Lo!"_ He called out, William ran into his legs and he scooped the boy up,

_"How're you?"_ He asked with a smile on his face, the little boy just smiled back hugging him around the neck. He glanced up to see Mike with **'the look'** on his face, and Rachael… still avoiding eye contact with him. Lily was in Mike's arms holding on tightly to him with her arms wrapped around his neck, and her face buried into the side of it.

**She used to cling to him like that.**

_"Hi, Lil."_ He said. The little girl didn't budge an inch; she made no acknowledgement of either him or Rachael. She just hung onto Mike tightly. Mike noticed the tense few moments and whispered something to the little girl.

Lillian's P.O.V.

She didn't want to see daddy or mummy because if she did, they would go away again. She hung tightly onto Uncle Mike, when she heard daddy come in,

"_Hi, Lil."_ She didn't move, she froze. She missed him, but she didn't want him to leave again. Uncle Mike leaned down into her ear,

_"Come 'ead, pretty. Your daddy's 'ere."_ She didn't move a muscle.

Paul's P.O.V.

Within the few tense moments his Da walked in with a smiling Holly.

_"'Lo."_ Da said walking over to Rachael where he pecked her on the cheek as welcoming. Paul watched as she mustered up a half-assed smile,

_"How was she?"_ He saw his dad chuckle,

_"Sweet as can be, didn't fuss once."_ Mike looked up at Paul sharing a knowing look.

_"Da, why don't you go help Rach put Will and Holly in the car?"_ Their father nodded, Rachael walked out the front door holding Holly without so much as glance to either of the brothers. His father came up to him reaching for William, Paul was reluctant but ultimately handed the child over. Lily was still tucked into the side of Mikes' neck. As soon as Da, Rachael, Holly and William were out of the house, Paul walked over to Mike.

_"So?"_ Mike said rocking Lily slightly.

_"I told her."_ Paul replied looking at Lillian,

_"And?"_ The younger brother queried.

_"You saw."_ It was quiet for a minute. Finally he reached out for Lily and Mike looked up, the little girl wouldn't let go.

_"Your daddy wants t' hold you, Pretty."_ Mike said, the little girl shook her head, burying it farther into his neck. Paul was upset- his own daughter wouldn't even look at him, Paul reached out putting a hand on the girls' back. She felt like stone.

Eventually with enough coaxing and prying Mike put the little girl on the floor. Paul reached down to pick her up and she swiftly enough avoided his grasp continuing to stare down at the floor. Mike excused himself,

_"I'll go put their bags in the boot."_ He exempted lamely on his way out. Paul just looked down at the little girl before kneeling down to her level.

_"Hi, Lil."_ He tried again quietly. She didn't say anything, she didn't acknowledge his presence, and she just stared down at the floor. He couldn't get a good look at her face. _"I missed you bunches, you know?"_ He tried reached for her pushing the hair out of her face. Still didn't look up. Paul put a finger under her chin tilting it up to look her straight in the face. He was shocked to say the least. The little girl had bags under her eyes and her face was wholly ashen. He tried pulling her into his arms, she merely stepped back. Paul raised an eyebrow,

_"What's th' matter, love?"_ He asked calmly- he knew perfectly well what the matter was. She simply shook her head. He reached out a hand to offer to her. She basically shoved her hands into her into her little pockets. He sighed, _"Where is yer coat, love?"_ She didn't utter a single word; she calmly stepped over to the bench near the front door and grabbed it pulling it on herself. Paul watched for a moment trying to button it up by herself. He walked over to lend a hand, when he knelt down and reached out; she took a step back refusing to let him even come near her. Once again his heart broke, how could he have made such a mess of things? He tried talking to her again, _"Did you 'ave fun with yer Uncle Mike?"_ She shrugged again still working at the buttons. She couldn't quite figure out how to fasten them; _"Lemme help you-" _He offered, reaching out again. But once more she shook her head, still not looking into his eyes and took a small step away trying to further distance herself. He sighed watching her before asking again, _"Come 'ead darling, what's the matter?"_ He waited calmly for a response. She stopped trying to fasten the buttons and she shoved her hands into the pockets,

_"You lefted."_ Paul frowned feeling overwhelmingly upset,

_"I didn't leave, I'm right here! Me 'nd mummy just went on a little holiday!"_It took a few moments but the girl slightly looked up evaluating him with such an innocent, candid stare Paul was mesmerized._ "See, I promise I didn't go anywhere, I'm here right now!"_ She was still analyzing him before he slowly reached out again, this time she didn't back away. Paul quickly did up the buttons of her coat before standing up, picking her up with him. He kissed her on the cheek and bounced her with a little smile,

_"There's me girl."_ She was still examining him,

_"You're not going to leave again, are you?"_ Paul was surprised by the question, and the innocent. harsh truth it held,

"_O' course not, love. I'm going t' stay with you."_ She wrinkled her eyebrows just a bit; Paul wondered if that was how he looked when he made the expression,

_"You said that last time."_ He gulped a little, how much pain had he caused?

_"I know, but I didn't leave did I?"_ She shrugged, still thoroughly unconvinced. He gave her a half-smile and brought her over to the couch where he sat cuddling her on his lap,

"_Don't even worry about it, love."_ He combed his fingers through her hair, _"You can see me whenever you want."_ She looked confused for a moment,

_"Aren't you coming home with me and my Willy?"_ Paul gulped back the sudden realization that no; in fact she was legally only Rachael's' and no; he didn't have a claim on her yet.

_"Well you see, love…"_ Paul hadn't a clue how to explain this to a five year old, what was he going to say** 'Your mummy hates me and I only can see you when she allows me to'**, or **'Mummy won't even look me in the eye, I'm a cheap heartless bastard for lying to her?'** Obviously he couldn't say that so he tried to patch it up, _"You're going home with mummy 'nd then you can come t' my house sometimes to stay with me."_ He couldn't believe how rightly screwed up that sounded. She shook her head,

_"You could come stay with us though, right?"_ He sighed shaking his head slightly,

_"No…"_ The little girl looked up at him in disbelief as if he had just told her Santa Claus wasn't real,

_"You said you wouldn't leave."_ She said trying to explain it to him he shook his head,

_"Awh no, love. It doesn't mean I'm leavin'. It's just that you'll spend half yer time with mummy, 'nd half the time with me."_ She shook her head,

_"Then just come live with mummy and Willy and Holly and me then for all the time."_ He sighed,

_"I wish I could, love."_ She shrugged,

_"Then do it."_ Paul would've given her the bloody world in the palm of his hand, he only wished it was that simple. He put on a happy face, trying to patch it up again,

_"Hey, don't even worry about it, love. I'll figure somethin' out."_ She nodded a little accepting it as an answer. He was amazed how children trusted so easily- it also scared him too.

He took the little girl outside where Mike was talking to Rachael and his father was talking to William. Holly was back in Rachael's arms. Paul walked over to where Mike and Rachael were discussing something in whispers. Before he was even in a five foot radius of them Mike shot him a look that clearly meant not to come over to them, instead Paul abruptly changed directions and instead headed for the car to buckle Lily in, he placed the little girl in the seat next to William whilst the boy was talking to his father, he pecked her on the cheek and ruffled the little boys hair,

_"I'll go get yer mummy 'nd we'll be out of here in a minute."_ They both nodded and Paul shut the door. His father shut the other side of the car and looked at him over the hood shaking his head slowly as if he was disappointed,

_"Be good to those kids, Paul. Lillian missed you like crazy, you should be thankful William was around to help take care of her."_ Paul nodded still feeling like a child himself after being scolded by his father. The two men glanced over back near the house where Mike and Rachael were still discussing something.

_"And be good to her too, she shouldn't have to deal with this."_ Paul nodded again in understanding feeling embarrassed- something he didn't feel all that often. He walked back over to the house in hopes of getting to say hello to Holly instead Rachael went past him with Holly in tow and he was left standing in front of Mike.

_"You've really done, haven't you?"_ Mike said quietly, _"You know what she told me?"_ He didn't even wait for him to give an answer, _"She said she's thinking about moving back t' the states. Chicago er whatever."_ Paul suddenly felt extremely dizzy, _"But I managed t' convince her not to."_ Paul suddenly felt relief, _"But believe me lad, it's definitely not for your sake. You know this week was the first time Da's ever talked about mum since she died? I was walking past his room 'nd he had Holly, and I heard him telling her about mum."_ Paul had common grounds within that, he had little talks with Holly all the time,_ "He said that mum would've loved t' have met them all."_ Both brothers were quiet for a while, before Mike continued, _"Listen, son. You've fucked up royally. Do good by them. And don't let her go, she's the best thing that's ever happened to you it's pretty bleedin' obvious."_ Paul nodded accepting the fact that his younger brother knew a lot more than he was getting on about.

_"Thanks then for taking care of me kids."_ Mike nodded giving Paul a pat on the back before returning to the house. Paul turned back to back to the car, looking through the window counting heads; Lily, Will, and Martha were in the backseat. Rachael was holding Holly in the front, and his spot was empty… he definitely didn't like that at all. He strode over to his side getting in and shutting the door against the cold. Holly was asleep against Rachael with her little body curled up, he wanted to get a chance to hold her and to say hello. Rachael on the other hand caught his look, avoided eye contact shaking her head, and switched Holly to her other shoulder farther away from him. It was a real kick in the stomach. He calmly started the engine and was about to pull out when he saw Mike jogging through the snow to his car window, Paul rolled it down and his younger brother handed him the doll,

_"Mary, I almost forgotted her!"_ Lily said from the back seat, Paul stopped for a moment, looking at the doll, taking account of her name and letting Mike reach past him to hand it to the little girl. Before Mike left he gave Paul a look and quietly said,

_"She named her. The doll's name is Mary. Think about that, son."_ And with that he left jogging up through the snow back to the house. Paul rolled the window back up deciding to let that one go and pulled away from the curb.

Around an hour into the drive not a word was spoken from either him or Rachael. William and Lillian chatted quietly amongst themselves for a while before passing out. Rachael was still holding Holly and the baby was playing with the stud in Rachael's ear. He couldn't focus on driving thought, too many thoughts were going through his head, what in the world had he just done?

The closer and closer they got to London, the more Paul wanted to turn the car around and get the hell out of dodge. Before he knew it they were pulling near St. Johns Wood and closer to their houses. He decided to go to his first to drop off Martha. Rachael obviously knew where he was heading and turned her complete attention outside the window to further ignore him. As he pulled up to the gates a swift rush of reporters and gatebirds met them. They knocked at the cars windows, shouted questions, and above all else held up the magazines with Dot's picture to the window. They finally got through the gate and Paul pulled up to the door. Neither William, Lily, nor Holly woke up. He finally turned to Rachael,

_"Love, why don't we bring the kids-"_ She instantly shook her head.

_"No. They're staying at mine."_ He closed his eyes taking a deep breath,

_"Why don't—"_ She cut him off again,

_"This isn't even a discussion. They're staying at mine. Final."_ He nodded slowly,

_"I'll just let the dog in."_ She shrugged turning her attention back to the baby. He got out of the car getting Martha out from the back, grabbed his suitcase and went into the house to drop them off. Just as he was about to walk back out the phone rang, he was about to let it go but decided to prolong this as much as possible so he wouldn't have to say goodbye to the kids.

_"'Lo?"_

_"It's Alistair. You need to come into the studio tomorrow at 8:00 so we can get this story out of the papers."_ He nodded,

_"Alright then. I'll bring Rachael."_ And with that he hung up. He went back out to the car and got in.

_"Alistair called. He wants us to go to the studio tomorrow at 8."_ She glanced over at him for only a second with an eyebrow raised and he continued, _"It's to get the story outta of th' papers."_ She closed her eyes and didn't utter a word. He took the long way to her house, driving slower than he needed to, and hitting every extra street that he could. Rachael knew what he was doing and just shook her head in disappointment.

There wasn't any avoiding it any longer when he finally pulled into her drive. They were met with reporters here too. When they got through the gate Rachael got out of the car first. She opened up the back door, Paul was about to open the door to carry them out when he clearly caught Rachael's look that said 'no'. He decided to ignore it and pulled the two older kids out, and carried them to the front door. She stood there for a moment with her eyes closed as if she was trying not to shout at him. When she opened her eyes again she turned around heading to the front door. Paul followed her into the house, it was deathly silent. She pointed over to the couch in the living room.

He went over with the older kids and laid them down. He pulled off their coats and shoes then wrapped a blanket around both of them whilst they held onto each other. He had no intentions of waking them up to say goodbye because there wasn't a chance in hell that he was leaving. He went in search of Rachael, she wasn't in the kitchen, she wasn't in the hall, not in either one of the sitting rooms, or the bathroom. He heard a door being opened upstairs and decided to go and find her. He went towards the light in Holly's room. She had just finished changing the baby and was putting her into the crib. She hadn't a clue that he was in the room, he watched for a minute as she put the baby down and pulled a little blanket over her. There wasn't a chance he was going to leave and let her do it alone. Paul walked up behind her putting a hand on her shoulder. She tensed up and stepped to the side,

_"Rach, I—"_ She quickly shook her head and looked back down at the sleeping baby, as did he._ "Rach, we need t' talk."_ He got out quickly. She didn't utter a word, she leaned over the rail of the crib and kissed Holly, then pushed past him. Paul took a deep breath, he too looking down at the sleeping child. He gave her a kiss, pulled the blanket up a little higher and turned off the lamp.

When he arrived in the hallway, she was standing leaning against the wall with her arms crossed. He shut the door behind him, and studied her. Her eyes shone lifeless and uncaring, she looked like she was absolutely defeated.

_"Rachael, I'm not going t' leave th' kids. I'm not going t' leave you."_ She rolled her eyes,

And with that a pair of very tired five year olds appeared at the top of the staircase. Both he and Rachael stopped in their tracks turning to them.

_"Willy and I hearded people yelling outside."_ Lily stated simply. Immediately both he and Rachael walked over to them,

_"Who was yelling?"_ Rachael asked calmly. She shrugged and wobbled a bit, William was leaning against the doorframe. She shot him a look and he went over to the window. He was shocked nonetheless about a mob of reporters outside.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Paul was staring out the window. I took a deep breath, turning my attention back to the kids, I couldn't believe this was happening. I held out hands for both of them and they latched on as I led them down the hall to William's room where they both slept. I put them in the bed together and gave them a kiss. Paul came up from behind me and gave them a kiss as well. Within the second their heads touched the pillow, they were out. I left the room, wanting now more than ever for Paul to leave.

I went over to the window and in fact I saw a horde of reporters waiting outside the gate. I watched them snap pictures and ring the bell whilst shouting over one and other in effort to be heard.

He came out a few minutes later_,_

_"Rach, I'm not goin' to leave you 'nd the kids 'ere with the bloody press outside the door."_ I crossed my arms looking still looking outside the window,

_"Paul. I have a gate. They'll be fine. Just leave."_ I could hear him sigh behind me. And with that I fell apart. The breath caught in my throat and the instant burning sensation of crying came over me. Tears spilled down my cheeks as I watched the press below.

_"Love, don't be upset—"_ I immediately shook my head,

_"Please just go."_ I said quietly, _"I'll see you tomorrow."_

_"Rach—"_ I ignored Paul, and walked past him down the stairs, he followed closely. When I got to the bottom I went over to the living room to pick up the kids discarded jackets and shoes.

Paul's P.O.V.

He didn't know what to do, he didn't know what to say. One of the best things that had ever happened to him was conclusively heart broken, and wanted nothing to do with him. He watched as she picked up the kids outerwear from the floor, how silent was the house? How silent was the pain? He watched as the pretty slip of bird, who he had just hours ago made love to, ignored him. He thought about the two tiny children and the baby upstairs, one of which he had help make. The other two that belonged to him undeniably by nature. He felt a knot in his chest, a sickly feeling, and his head pounded steadily. It was like he was watching this fall apart in slow motion. He didn't want this to fall apart. He couldn't let this fall apart.

The pretty slip of bird he once had was facing away from him looking out the windows while keeping herself half-hidden behind a curtain. He watched the pretty forms' shoulders shaking with a sob, an inaudible sob. She was good at keeping the pain to herself. He didn't like that. She should've been there yelling at him, calling him out on his mistake. But she didn't. She stood there alone. He longed to walk up to her and pull her into him from behind, he didn't remember how to work his legs. He longed to pull her tight and promise this would never happen again, he didn't remember how to speak. He longed for the chance to look into those dark eyes- the ones that seemed to sparkle at the hint of a joke, the ones that had a nearly golden ring that distinguished the black of color from the pupil, the ones that made him go wild, the ones that he had fallen in crazy; stupid; and insane; love with- but she wouldn't look at him.

Paul finally snapped half-way out of it, he remembered how to speak finally;

_"Love, why don't we—"_ The pretty slip of bird turned around. He was shocked at how the ashen white of her skin contrasted with the dark of her eyes, and the dark-brown of her hair.

_"Go away."_ She looked back towards the window, "_Please."_ His heart shattered, how could one person had made him fall this hard?

_"Sweetheart, we have t' talk."_ He said gently. She shook her head,

_"Talking has gotten us nowhere. See you then."_ She said quietly in almost a whisper. Paul ran a hand through his hair in a frantic way.

_"What about—"_

_"The kids will be fine. Go."_ This time it came out as more of a command rather than a request.

_"No, love, I meant what about you?"_ She scoffed slightly still hiding behind the curtain and watching the mess before her,

_"Like I said. My name's Rachael. And I'm not your love, or your sweetheart, or any of those other lies. Don't worry about me. If you did, this wouldn't have happened."_ Paul was absolutely withdrawn. She weakly pointed to the door. He couldn't stand to see the pretty thing cry anymore, it was like a stab to the heart.

He backed away slowly to the door; **how in the world had he gotten here?**

He looked up the staircase, the door to the baby's room was closed, the door to the other two tiny children's was opened the slightest crack.

**What happened to the promise he made? He promised the little girl he wouldn't leave.**

**What was he doing?**

His legs seemed to be doing the work for him. As soon as he opened the door, a hells' wrath of voices lurched out calling to him, each one as urgent and demanding as the next. Automatically he got to his car and pulled out staring straight ahead, it took nearly twenty minutes but he'd managed to get out of the gate and out onto the road. When he got back to his home he repeated the scene- this time the fuel of the reporters being added to the incoherent shrieks of the gatebirds. He entered the house. The empty house. Only to be greeted by a dog- who still thought she was a puppy- looking for the kids that came over and played with her. There were none. She looked rather disappointed if a dog could look that way. Her ears went down, and her stub of a tail stopped shaking. She sniffed him. Looked back up at him. Then walked away. Paul listened for a moment, not a sound in the world could be heard, he could hear his heart beating wildly, and that was all. The clock read 9 o'clock, in the evening.

He was all alone.

Without another living soul in the residence (excluding the disappointed dog).

Without those 3 kids that didn't understand why mummy and daddy weren't together like the other kids' were.

Without that girl who he was pretty damn sure was an angel sent in prayer at a time when his band was in the midst of their downfall.

Without anything.

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**A/N: Review it people! :)**


	46. Chapter 46

**A/N: Review it, I want to know what you think of it!**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

I sat at the kitchen counter staring at the clock. I was completely numb of thought; I nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang. I absentmindedly picked it up,

_"Rachael, it's Mo_." How nice it was to hear her voice,

"_Hi."_ I said quietly,

_"How're you?"_ She asked gently. Great. Everyone knew. Immediately the breath caught in my throat and I started crying again, _"I'll be right there. Mind the gate, love."_ I nodded into the receiver, and hung up.

I went over to the window, and waited. I was crying so hard, I almost missed the sea of reporters parting. I ran to the door letting her car in quickly. As soon as she parked, I opened the door, and she waved for me to come over. Zak was sleeping in the backseat, and baby Jason was in the carrier nodding off. She got Zak and I got the baby. Wordlessly we brought them into the house, and upstairs. Zak was put into bed with both Lily and William. The three of the mashed together looked like a pile of sleeping puppies. Jason was taken to Holly's room and put on the other side of the crib. Finally Mo pulled me down the stairs and into the living room. She sat me down on the couch pulling me into a hug,

_"What happened, love?"_ She asked. And with that I spilled. I told her about the night of the club. I told her about the trip to the hospital, I told her about the trip to Scotland. I told her about Dot. The entire time she held my hand and helped me through the parts that were too difficult for me to get through. A sudden realization came across her face,

_"You're pregnant?"_ I slowly nodded another wave of tears falling, I shook so hard, she pulled me into another hug. We sat there for a while, saying nothing. Eventually the tears stopped on my part, and I took a breath.

_"Stay here."_ She said quietly.

Maureen's P.O.V.

When she heard the story in the paper's she had been shocked to say the absolute least. Of course wild stories were always being thrown around about each of the boys, but this was different. Rachael was involved. As soon as she saw it she showed it to Ritchie who read it slowly, shook his head, and looked back at her with the most honest face she'd ever seen and said;

_"Call 'er."_ And she did. Rachael didn't sound good on the phone. Immediately Maureen got both of the kids, and sped over to Rachael's' house. Rachael had told her everything. The crowd outside seemed to get only larger as the time passed. She ordered Rachael to stay on the couch. Maureen herself went to the phone, her first call was to Mal; she asked him to come over and start to disperse some of the crowd. Her next call was to Ritchie; whom she told to go ask Paul what the hell had gone on.

There wasn't a chance she was going to let Rachael get hurt; she loved the girl like a sister.

Paul's P.O.V.

He didn't know how in the world he got here. The music was pounding, the air was thick with cigarette smoke, and he was surrounded by women. The club was filled to the brim; he didn't know the girl that was sitting on his lap. She was flirtatiously pushing herself up against him and giggling to her little friends. Another drink came to him- he couldn't count; **was this the 4th or 5th?** Conversation was going on all around him, he couldn't hear though. He'd promised the little girl he wouldn't leave. He never thanked the little boy for taking care of his tiny sister. He didn't get to have a little talk or cuddle with the baby.

A few hours passed- The women were all around practically throwing themselves at him. He didn't see them. He was almost sure that the music was loud, but he couldn't hear it. All he could see was the pretty slip of bird crying. Finally he couldn't take it anymore. Paul left the club, walking with his head down through the crowds of photographers and reporters and into his car. Though his vision was fuzzy, and he had more than a few drinks he managed to make it home alright. He got through the front door, and looked around expecting to hear a voice- just something. But of course there wasn't.

He reached underneath the counter and pulled out a bottle of Scotch. He sacrificed a glass and just took the bottle back to the chair by the fireplace. He unscrewed the cap and took a long drink. The alcohol burned as it trickled down his throat. It had been years since he'd tasted straight Scotch. Paul tipped the scotch bottle and took another long guzzle. He could almost feel the want he experienced in Scotland for Rachael, how desperately he had to make love to her, how sweet and funny she was with him. His eyes squeezed shut as he begged for forgiveness.

The forgiveness never came. He had one bottle down, and could still feel the pain. He opted to grab another one to try and numb it. Halfway through it he couldn't remember why he was here. Or where everyone was. Or why he was alone. So he tried to look for everyone. It ended in a broken mirror, and him landing on the couch. Alone. **Where was everyone?**

His head was throbbing and he chugged another mouthful of liquor. He looked around the empty room. Out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of a picture. It was a colorful, shakily drawn picture. Then he remembered. The little girl and the little boy had worked on that together. **Where were they?**

It took him a while but finally he remembered. He glanced at the clock, it was 12 or 1; he couldn't make out the numbers through his blurred vision. He tried standing up to reach the phone. His legs weren't at all steady and he ended up falling into the couch. As if on cue the phone rang, it took loads of determination but he finally managed to stumble his way over to grab it.

_"'Lo?"_ He garbled

_"Paul it's Ritch. What th' fuck 'appened?"_ Paul instantly broke down,

_"She made me leave, Ritch. She made me go."_ He slurred,

_"I don't blame 'er, son. Maureen's over there now. Where are you?"_ Paul looked around for a moment trying to decipher an answer,

_"My house."_ He reached for the bottle and took another swig, but it was empty- **2 down**. He let it slide out of his hand and flinched as it shattered on the floor.

_"What th' hell was that, son?"_ Paul shrugged leaning his head back, trying to remember where the kids were,

_"Bottle."_

_"Of?"_

_"Shite."_ Paul answered wondering if there was another bottle under the counter.

_"Don't move."_ Ritch stated, and hung up. Suddenly Paul felt sick, **maybe he needed another drink?**

Rachael's P.O.V.

Maureen stayed the night and left in the morning. It was nearly 7 o'clock by now. One of the secretaries from Apple called to remind me of the meeting at 8… I didn't want to go. I got ready for the day putting on a shift dress that would conceal the bump, and a long coat. I did my makeup to hide the evidence of my tears, and my hair in a similar fashion. Lucy came over to watch the kids; they were still asleep when I left.

A car met me to take me to the meeting, when I walked in I was directed to conference room. The conference room had quite a few people in there- Alistair, Derek, Mal… and Paul. When I walked in I was greeted by pecks on the cheek from everyone—except for Paul who I swiftly took a seat on the opposite side of the table from. Conversation was light, no one felt like talking much Paul was staring at me from the other side of the table; I ignored it instead taking out a small pad of paper and pen from my purse and writing things I needed to do today.

Paul's lawyer arrived. He was an old, paunchy, jowly man with lower lids that drooped so badly they almost turned inside out. The pinkness exposed accentuated the icy coldness of his eyes. Introductions were made, Paul looked like he was going to be sick, and I felt sick.

The first order of business was to show him the story in the magazine.

_"Well, that is quite to the point,"_ he said in a deep voice. His rheumy old eyes focused on Paul. _"Was it your child?"_ he asked bluntly.

_"Yes."_ The room went silent.

_"Explain what happened."_

Paul gave him the same story he had given me.

_"So she miscarried, and then you broke ties?"_ The lawyer summarized brusquely.

_"Well-"_

_"Yes?"_ The lawyer tried again, Paul looked over at me and I looked out the window.

_"Yes."_ He said quietly.

_"Be that as it may, she can't prove it. Indeed, she cannot. All she can prove is that the child 'could've' been yours. Fortunately for our side, that may be all that is necessary."_ I watched as Paul raised an eyebrow, _"She cannot prove that child was indeed yours, therefore she hasn't the right to be selling the story."_ The sudden realization hit Paul's face- and the relief was automatic,

_"We can get the story out of the papers quickly, all you have to do is deny that it happened. You can release a press statement, and that can be the end of it."_ I looked out towards the window, now we were playing the lying game… great.

Paul's P.O.V.

His head was pounding; Ritchie had come over and hidden the liquor from him last night. When he woke up in the morning and inspected the damage- 2 bottles of whiskey finished, one shattered on the floor, one broken mirror, and a phone cord ripped out of the wall. He looked across the table at Rachael—she looked fantastic… the problem was that she wouldn't look at him. After he had given the story to the lawyer, she carefully avoided eye contact with him instead looking out the window.

Alistair went over what to expect from the press and how to handle it. From "No comment" to "No interviews," to keeping the doors locked at all times. Paul was ignoring him still staring at Rachael—**she still wouldn't look at him.**

_"Right,"_ Mal finally said. _"Come on, Derek, we have to work on the press release."_

_"Ah, yes,"_ Derek said,_ "the solicitous and carefully worded bullshit."_

_"Exactly,"_ Alistair said as they left. Paul looked over at Rachael for a moment. She was standing up and throwing her purse back over her shoulder, he tried to stop her.

_"Rach…"_ He didn't know exactly what to say. **Stop? I'm so sorry? Don't do this? I love you? How are my kids?** None of those seemed to fit what he was experiencing. She stopped and looked him over for a moment before pulling a pair of sunglasses out of her purse.

_"Congrats,"_ Was all she said,_ "For another mess you don't have to deal with."_ He felt like a right bastard then, more than he had ever before.

_"Love, just sit so we can talk."_ He ordered softly, looking around the empty conference room. She glanced at him for only a moment, then shook her head;

_"I've got kids to take care of."_ She said quietly, _"See you."_ She slid her sunglasses on, and was about to walk out the door when he stood up reaching for her as she passed. He caught her wrist and held on tight. She stopped calmly, looking down at her wrist. He was surprised by his actions, as was she. But he looked back at the empty chair,

_"Just… come 'ead, love. We have t' talk."_ She looked back towards the door shaking her head slightly,

_"I have… things to do. Stuff—"_She excused lamely, he felt his heart break again.

_"Rach—that's not entirely fair."_ He tried to explain, she looked up at him in disbelief, and he thought she was going to start yelling. But she stopped herself, pursed her lips, then calmly stated,

_"It's also not fair that I have to be here. Sucks doesn't it?"_ She calmly unwrapped his fingers from her wrist and with that she left. Paul watched her walk out the door- he couldn't bring himself to move. He stood there feeling numb.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I kept extremely busy the entire day in order not to think. I unpacked the kids bags, went grocery shopping, cleaned the house from top to bottom, ignored all phone calls—especially since I knew it was reporters, and kept the kids busy. By eight o'clock the phone wouldn't stop ringing I finally answered it,

_"Hello?"_

_"Rachael, doll, it's Christian."_ I felt a bit relieved,

_"Hi, how're you?"_ I said as expected, he got straight to the point,

_"I'll be in London tomorrow, I'm staying for two days, do you need any help?"_ I felt a weight being lifted off my shoulders,

_"Yeah, that'd be great; I'll get the guestroom ready."_ And I did. The phone continued ringing and I continued ignoring it. Before it was dinner time the kids were hanging around the kitchen, Lily was looking out the window and William was coloring, and Holly was in her high chair. It was quiet except for the rings every couple of minutes- to which I'd swiftly pick up, and then hang up. I made spaghetti—that was about as fancy as it got. William ate, Holly got more on the floor and sauce in her face than she got in her mouth, and Lily just sat staring out the window. After a bit I sat down with them,

_"What's the matter, doll?"_ I asked Lily quietly. She looked at me, then back out the window,

_"When's daddy coming?"_ I grimaced; I managed to avoid that subject all day,

_"Uh well… he's at his house."_ I amended gently. Lily looked back at me; it was astonishing how much she looked like Paul.

_"When's he coming over to play?"_ She asked directly to the point. I bit the inside of my cheek and looked at the phone that began to ring again; thankful for the distraction I got up and answered it.

_"Hello?"_ I answered.

_"Rach?"_ It was Paul. My heart stopped… so much for a distraction.

_"Yes."_ I said quietly.

_"Oh god… why weren't you picking up?"_ I folded my arms, feeling the anger and sadness come back; something I'd managed to avoid all day.

_"I was busy."_ I could hear him sigh,

_"How're me kids?"_

_"Fine."_

_"What're they doing?"_

_"Eating."_ One word responses were less painful.

_"Rach… maybe we should—"_ I immediately cut him off not wanting to fall into this trap again,

_"Is there something you wanted?"_ I said in stark.

_"Well… I'd like t' see me kids."_ He said quietly. I looked back at the table to William who was stuffing his face, Holly who was covered in sauce, and Lily who was staring out the window. I shook my head,

_"I really don't think that's a good idea. I don't want them all worked up."_ I confessed quietly,

_"Rachael, you have t' be kidding me?"_ I shook my head into the receiver,

_"No. I'm not kidding."_

_"They're half mine though!"_ He said in an outraged manner, I winced a little trying to keep my voice steady so the kids wouldn't suspect anything was wrong,

_"No. Lillian is half yours if anything. William and Holly are not."_

_"Rachael, honey, we have t' talk about this."_ How many times was he going to say that? I didn't want to talk to him at all, I couldn't believe I was in this situation,

_"Paul, I think we need some time away from each other…"_

_"You can't run away from every little problem, Rach."_ He said coldly, I was annoyed,** 'little'** problem?

"No. But I can hang up on them."

_"Don't—"_I put the phone back on the cradle. By now the kids were just about finished with dinner, except for Lily. I took a rag and wiped William's face; letting him off the chair to go play, I managed to wipe most of the sauce off of Holly- she would need a bath later; Lily hadn't touched a thing on her plate. I sat at the table for a while before she glanced at me and I nodded down towards the plate. She looked at it, shrugged and glanced back up at me,

_"One bite, babe."_ I said. She took the fork in her left hand stabbing at a few noodles chewing them unenthusiastically. _"One more."_ I tried; she shook her head putting the fork down. She stared at me for a few moments, I decided I wasn't going to argue with her—she'd be hungry sooner or later. I picked her up letting her off the chair then cleaned up the kitchen, after a bit the kids were starting to wind down. William already went up to bed, dragging Lily off with him. Holly was chewing on a stuffed bear in the living room; the gate wouldn't stop ringing- I was sick and tired of the group of reporters. I went to go check; and was surprised to find a car at the gates, I let it through waiting patiently until the visitor got through the mob and inside; it was Christian.

_"Bit early?"_ I said as he approached, he chuckled with a shrug.

_"Plans changed. I can only stay until tomorrow night."_ I let him in, we chatted for a while; carefully avoiding the subject of Paul. He went up to read a story to William and Lil and that was that. The phone was ringing again and again; I was just about ready to pull it out of the wall but when I answered I was surprised to hear Teddy's voice,

_"Jesus, sweetheart, do you ever answer the phone?"_ I sighed,

_"Reporters, dad."_ I called Teddy my dad because that was who he was filling in for. I heard Christian call down; **"Hey Rach, I've got Holly with me!**" I shouted an** 'okay'** back up.

_"Who was that?"_ Teddy asked suspiciously, I cringed knowing that he really didn't like Christian for reasons I didn't feel like discussing.

_"A friend…"_ I tried, Teddy wasn't taking this for an answer,

_"Rachael."_ He warned, I gave up,

_"It's Christian."_ I could literally hear my uncle growl.

_"Why's he there, and where is Paul?"_ I closed my eyes.

_"You've seen the papers. I'm not talking to him. Christian is filling in."_ A family trait I inherited very well began to show through in Teddy; his temper got the best of him.

_"Rachael Noelle Belter. I don't want him in your house."_ I rolled my eyes, I wasn't a child anymore.

_"It's my house."_

_"I said I want him out."_ I scoffed,

_"I think—"_

_"No Rachael. You don't think. He's out. No arguments."_ I sighed with defeat; I couldn't argue with my dad.

"_Whatever."_ I mumbled. We chatted for a while longer before exchanging goodbyes.

Paul's P.O.V.

He found what Ritchie had hidden yesterday night; he had hit it pretty hard, he was in for an awful hangover. The phone rang and he stumbled over to it,

_"'Lo?"_ He slurred.

_"Seriously, McCartney?"_ Ringo scoffed, his temper got the best of him,

_"Leave me be, Ritch."_ Ringo let out a frustrated sigh into the phone;

_"Yeah, well, Alistair called and you have t' be at another charity thing tomorrow night. So you better not miss it."_ Paul rolled his eyes,

_"'M not goin'."_

_"You are if you want th' bad press t' go away."_ Ritch stated sharply. The realization hit Paul.

_"'M not showing up there by me fucking self."_

_"Well I am."_ Paul was confused he took another drink from the bottle,

_"Wharra 'bout Maureen?"_

_"She's going with a friend."_ Paul finally gave up.

_"Fine. See you."_ He tossed the phone on the floor carelessly looking around. Martha had retreated to the couch. He was lonely as he'd ever been. There wasn't anyone to talk to, or just be with—he hated it, he was going mad.

He wondered what the kids were doing; and thought about driving over to see them. He doubted Rachael would let him in the gate; and he didn't want the press to be all over him.

So he drank. A lot. To try and numb over the pain. **It didn't help.**

Rachael's P.O.V.

The next time I answered the phone it was Maureen;

_"Rach, what are you doing tomorrow night?"_ I looked around the room-

_"Nothing. Why?"_

_"You're coming with me to a charity event."_ She said. Immediately I rejected,

_"No way, the press is going to be awful-"_

_"Not if they see you out and about; all you have to do is deny the story."_ Another thought came into my head,

_"I'm not going alone, Maureen."_

_"That's right, you're coming with me."_ I was frustrated;

_"I don't—"_ I started,

_"Yes you do, I've seen your closet, it's amazing."_ She knew every trick. I tried to think of another excuse,

_"What about—"_

_"Call Lucy."_ I groaned, she knew me too well.

_"I don't wa—"_

_"Well neither do I."_ I let out a frustrated huff, she was too damn good.

_"Fine. What time?"_

_"Eight tomorrow night, thank you lovely!"_ I rolled my eyes with a smile, she was pretty charming when she wanted to be.

_"Whatever, Mo."_ And with that I hung up.

Paul's P.O.V.

He woke up late the next afternoon, he groaned—the hangover was just as awful as he predicted. He took a shower, shaved for the first time in a week, and got his outfit ready for the stupid charity event tonight. He missed the kids desperately; fuck, he missed Rachael desperately. Paul cleaned up the broken glass around the house- it'd be best not to explain it to the housekeeper, and when the time finally came he got ready to go to the event. And like he was so good at doing- he put on a fake smile for the press, and got on with it.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Christian had left around 6 o'clock, and Lucy came over to watch the kids. I didn't want to go—scratch that; I really didn't want to go to the charity event. I had my hair done, makeup done, and it took a lot of effort but I wrapped my stomach and found a tight black dress that disguised the bump underneath very well, I checked it over many times in the mirror making sure no one cloud tell; and that the reporters definitely couldn't tell.

Mo picked me up around 7:30; as she promised, I was her date, Ritchie was taking a separate car with a friend. When we arrived at the event, it was teeming with press as soon as we stepped out the car doors the shouting escalated and so did the flashing of the cameras, Mo managed to pull me inside quickly. I was a bit unnerved, I managed to block most of the questions and shouting out of my head and put on a fake smile to get on with it.

Mo and I made our rounds as expected; she did most of the talking, I did most of the smiling we finally found ourselves alone in a private space where we let out a collective sigh of relief,

_"I hate these things."_ She mumbled, I nodded in agreement.

_"Hey girls."_ We both spun around to see a pleasant faced Pattie, I grinned and she pulled both of us into a hug,

_"I didn't know you'd be here!"_ Mo exclaimed, Pattie shrugged;

_"George told me he didn't want to come alone."_ Both Maureen and I looked at giving a knowing smile.

As time went on we found ourselves seated in a lounge area, I had managed to forget most of the confusion and pain that Paul had left me with, and was sort of enjoying myself. More than once I would get too caught up in my head and Mo would poke me in the side to bring me back into conversation. I was thankful for her, she was truly my best friend. It was nearing ten, and I would be able to leave in an hour or two; that was until Ritchie walked up to us,

_"Hello."_ He said smiling at us all, we scooted over to make room for him as he ordered himself a drink; after a bit George came over with his friend Eric, and before I knew it Eric was tugging me off onto the dance floor. I laughed my way over and he pulled me tight; he was definitely a friendly guy,

_"So you're the famous Eric Clapton?"_ I smirked, he chuckled with a wink,

_"One 'nd only. And you're Rachael Belter. So I guess that makes us even huh?"_ I laughed and nodded, after our dance he took me back over to where George and Pattie were conversing loudly with the couple next to them. We crowded around the table, the music and laughter loud, and suddenly I felt a tap on my shoulder, I turned around and was completely surprised to find John.

_"John?"_ I said confusedly, he wrinkled his eye brows together with a smirk,

_"Rachael?"_ I rolled my eyes and gave him the finger, making room around the table for him.

John's P.O.V.

He hadn't played **'Beatle John'** for a while. Mal had informed him of the charity event and surprisingly enough he had agreed to go. He already knew for certain that both Ritch and George were to be there. When he managed to spot them he was surprised to find Rachael standing in the group. He'd recently heard—no everyone had heard the 'Dot' story, and the media frenzy going on around that, he surveyed Rachael up and down; he couldn't understand how Paul could've let her go again—hell, he would've liked to have a go with her if he wasn't already with Yoko. He came up behind her,

_"John?"_ She said with her eyebrows crinkled like she didn't actually believe it was him—Christ she was good looking;

_"Rachael_?" He said mocking her, the cheeky bird flipped him off and made room for him at the table. He'd gotten surprised looks and a nod of hello from both Ritch and George; but ultimately they looked happy that he was here. He put an arm around Rachael leaning over;

_"So what, no date?"_ He asked with a smirk. He was lucky Rachael was one of those birds that could give it back as good as she got it,

_"Nope. Where's Yoko?"_ The famous Lennon temper almost flared up for a moment thinking she was baiting him about Yoko, but there was nothing there but her question. He relaxed a little,

_"Dunno. She went somewhere."_ She nodded, _"Where's Paul?"_ He asked quietly. For a moment he saw a flash in her eyes, but then nothing more before she shrugged as well;

"_Don't care."_ He chuckled; even though she had a 'thing' with Paul, he knew there was hurt there, and decided not to push it,

_"Wanna be me date then?"_ He asked wiggling his eyebrows, she laughed a little; he saw the pain lessen from her eyes a bit;

_"Sure."_

_"Fine then, date. Come here 'nd let me show you the talented part of Lennon/McCartney."_ She laughed and he led her away to a more private corner.

Rachael's P.O.V.

For as much as I was hurting and as much as I wanted to die; John's humor seemed to really lessen the pain.

Before I knew it we were in a separate lounge space and both relaxed comfortably making fun of the people around us. One comment in particular almost had me in tears that John made about a woman with a **'Rather large pair of knockers'**. I leaned back resting my head against the arm he had around me when I felt jab in my side from John. _"What?"_ I asked, glancing up at him, he simply nodded straight ahead. I followed the direction of his gaze.

Paul was across the room, talking to a group of people. **_Shit_,** I thought. Within a moment his head spun towards us taking in the sight of us huddled up on the lounge couch. He did not look amused, but wiping on his PR face he started toward us politely nodding at people along the way. I tried to move but John would not let me even as I glared at him.

He pleaded ignorance and I knew he was going to make me face him,

_"'Lo, John."_ Paul said quietly.

John, expressionless, said, _"Paul, friend, let me introduce you t' me date Rachael..."_ I was completely shocked at how bluntly John had called Paul out.

_"John,"_ Paul said testily, _"you need t' stay out of this."_ John looked at him with an expression that clearly read **'Who? Me?'.**

John knew our history and he pulled his arm a tad bit tighter around me, making a point to Paul. I just scanned the room, looking for anything to distract me from Paul's never-wavering stare. John was actually saving my ass.

_"Rachael, love, let's go get drinks."_ John said sweetly, I looked up at him; he nodded with an expression that read **'go along with it'**. So I did.

_"What the hell was that?"_ I hissed jabbing John in the side when we arrived at the bar.

"Your me date!" I shot him a look and he went on, _"Rachael, everyone knows how bad it is between you two; what were you going t' do if I hadn't said anything? Sat there 'nd stared at him?"_ The realization hit me.

_"Thanks, John."_ I said quietly, he threw another arm around my shoulder;

_"'S no problem, milady."_ We both ordered drinks; the bartender added a little bit of cranberry juice to the water I had requested to make it look like a cocktail; and avoid suspicion from everyone. John raised an eyebrow as I ordered; it took him a minute before he figured it out;

_"You're—"_ I nodded already knowing what he was going to ask. He looked at me for a moment. _"Macca's definitely fucked up this time."_ I raised an eyebrow and put on a fake look of surprise,

_"Really?"_ He smirked putting the arm back around me and led me back over to the table where Mo, Ritchie, George, Pattie, and Eric—and Paul were sitting. I made a noise of protest, but he sat me down on the seat next to him. John allowed a small smile to curve his lips as he slipped his arm behind my chair, moving closer. Okay, now he was getting into the torture. Paul was glaring at us from across the table; the rest of the crowd wasn't really paying attention; they were giving Ritchie hell for some crazy story he was telling. John leaned down and whispered into my ear;

_"Jesus Christ, I've never seen 'im so angry."_ Paul taking everything in and tried to wipe him from my visual sphere. As time passed John made me forget about Paul; we were quietly talking amongst ourselves; Maureen finally caught on with a confused look upon her face, she glanced at Paul and then back to John and I with a look that clearly asked **'What the hell is going on?'**. I shrugged, Mo had dragged me here; John was just helping me get through it. John went up to get me another drink seeing as though mine was half empty. As soon as he got up someone slid in next to me. Paul. I glanced over at him for a second; my throat immediately became tight and my skin prickled.

_"Hello, Rach."_ Paul said quietly. I took a breath;

_"Hello, Paul."_ I said as expected; nothing more, nothing less. Mo caught the look I shot her and immediately she kicked Pattie under the table who shot a look of surprise but finally caught on giving Maureen a worried expression. John came back around,

_"Scoot over, date."_ John said, I scooted over as much as I could to make room for John, Paul scooted right next to me forcing John to sit next to him. I gulped;_ "Alrighty then."_ John said sarcastically taking his seat and reaching over Paul to hand me my drink. Paul was not amused. I took another sip of my drink, Paul was eyeing me; a dance was announced and Pattie, George, Ritchie and Mo paired off. Mo shot me a look that specifically said **'I'm so sorry.'** I shrugged, sorry wasn't a help to me at all. John went off for another drink at the bar. Great. I was alone with Paul.

It was if the room was suddenly silent, no one around, only Paul and I. Paul reached out his hand for me; I swiftly scooted farther down the lounge. I didn't exactly look at him but out of the corner of my eye I caught the hurt; pain; and confusion on his face- hell, the look on his face only a portion of what I had suffered through the last few months. He quickly recovered taking a sip of his drink;

_"You look great, Rach."_ He said quietly,

_"Thanks."_ I replied. People were starting to watch us; a few whispers and glances added up here and there,

_"Fucking freak show…"_ Paul muttered. My skin felt hot; my nerves were running on a wire; I wanted to leave so bad. It was pretty obvious that people around us had noticed us back sitting next to each other; it was inevitable. Paul scooted back next to me; I couldn't move in protest- my mind was blank; how was I going to deal with this? Alistair and Mal's orders were pounding in my head** 'Deny the story'**. Why did I have to lie for him and pretend things were okay in public, when they weren't? Maybe it was to help him. Mostly it was to save myself from the public embarrassment. I really didn't know anymore; I was way out of my head.

Over the next few minutes more and more people were spreading the word; I glanced uncomfortably around; Paul must've caught my look, because he put a hand on my leg leaning over;

_"You okay?"_ I shrugged, of course not!

Paul's P.O.V.

The pretty slip of bird looked like a deer in the headlights; he couldn't help but notice how fantastic she was looking, her dress to perfection with hair and makeup following suit. The mix of emotions he felt inside was incredible: he wanted to shout at her and tell her to get the kids, get in the car, and get to his house, because they were meant to be a family. He wanted to cry because of how broken he felt and how lost she looked. But, he didn't want to make the pretty slip of bird anymore upset. The room was humming louder; the crowd of people glancing over at them occasionally seemed to call out for something more; he felt sick—he had to put on a bloody show.

**And then he heard their song.**

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**A/N: It'll continue next chapter, review it!**


	47. Chapter 47

**A/N: My cousin wrote it review it!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

His heart wrenched in pain; he glanced over at her. She was hearing it too. The memories lived only a few short days ago flooded back to him; When they were in Scotland, how he'd danced her around the room and officially declared it their song; how sweet and loving she'd been with him; how they would laugh at the stupidest things; how he wanted to put a ring on that pretty little finger.

He came back to reality; the song had only just started, a few people from around the room were staring at them as if to ask, 'why aren't they up and together?'. Paul glanced back over at her, she was glancing shyly up at the people who were staring at them; her cheeks were flushed and her lips pursed.

Rachael's P.O.V.

I felt like screaming, crying, and running out; but how bad would that look? How many people would go off and tell the press? How hard would it be to deny the story after that? My eyes searched for a way out; I was blocked from the front back and two sides; people were all around, standing by the doors, watching the crowd, there wasn't a way out. I put down my drink and was about to stand up to find a way to leave; but before could push up Paul grabbed my wrist firmly and I was unable to move; he leaned over,

_"Rach… people will stop talking if we get out there."_ He said quietly. I glanced up; people were still casually glancing over as if they didn't know that we knew that they were watching. I didn't want to get out there with him; if anything I wanted him to let go of the hold he had on my wrist. He was now standing up holding out a hand; a rather nosy woman was watching the play-out for her friend's, every couple of seconds updating them on what we were doing. Paul caught where my stare was and grimaced when he saw the woman. He held out his hand again; and I relented. After the dance I was getting the hell out of here.

Paul's P.O.V.

He was amazed that she actually was letting him lead her to the dance floor. He led her near the center. No longer was dancing with Rachael the same; before she would put her arms around his neck and he would squeeze his arms around her waist. And it was comfortable. Now it was fake. She put an hand on his shoulder and he held the other; he tried to put a hand on her waist but he caught the look she shot him and moved it up towards her back. She wouldn't look at him; instead she was looking around watching other people. He glanced down at her; no longer were they pressed up together like before; there was a distance between them, an uncomfortable distance, a phony distance. Something caught his eye though; the bump that he had put there seemed to have vanished.

_"Rach; how in the world did you hide it?"_ Paul whispered still looking down at her dress, his tone had softened. In answer she glanced down too; then shrugged;

_"Tight dress._" She answered in a completely monotone voice before looking away again. He bit the inside of his cheek trying to get on with it;

_"So you came with Maureen?_" She nodded and he went on, _"You look beautiful, Rach._" He added quietly.

_"Thanks."_ She answered completely as expected. He sighed willing her to look up at him; but she wouldn't. He felt his heart break again, _"Are th' kids with Lucy?"_ He asked quietly; she nodded with a small** 'yep'**.

_"How're they?_" She looked the other way,

_"What do you think?"_ She snapped almost inaudibly. Something snapped from within him as well, the song ended. She pulled away,

_"See you."_ She said. His temper got the best of him;** 'He wasn't going to let her leave again.'** She turned and he grabbed her arm and propelled her toward a terrace, and suddenly they were outside in the frigid December night air.

Rachael's P.O.V.

He grabbed my arm and propelled me towards an entrance, and suddenly we were outside in the frigid December night air. I was furious, he definitely had no right to be doing this. He shut the door behind us before I could protest and pushed me towards a corner of the balcony completely hidden from the huge French doors. I spun around on him;

_"What, Paul?_" I huffed and crossed my arms in anger;

_"Rachael. We need t' talk._" I closed my eyes;

_"What do you want to talk about?"_

_"I want t' talk about 'this'… whatever it is that we're doing."_

_"What '**we**' are doing?"_ I asked in disbelief, _"There is no '**we**'. '**I**' am going home. '**You**' are doing whatever you want."_ He huffed running a hand through his hair;

_"No, Rach. There is a '**we**' because there are going t' be 5 little kids."_ I looked away;_ "That's why there's a 'we', not separately."_

_"No. There's not."_ I shot back,

_"Yes. There is."_

_"I'm not going to stand here and argue with you, Paul."_

_"Fine, let's not argue."_

_"Good, let me leave."_

_"Rachael."_ He hissed,_ "We've got t' figure something out because I can't do this anymore."_

_"Paul."_ I shot back,_ "I've already got my things figured out. Think for yourself."_

_"Rach, that's not entirely fair."_ He rounded back; I stopped silent.

_"I need time._" I finally said._ "To figure out what I'm doing, I guess."_ He started shaking his head but I continued; _"You need time to think about what you're doing too."_

_"Rach—_" I cut him off once again; I couldn't stand here and deal with it in public;

_"People are watching us."_ I said glancing over his shoulder to the French doors where some idiotic woman was eyeing me; I caught her glance and she blushed turning away._ "I lied for you. I pretended everything was okay for the reporters."_ I tucked my hair behind my ears, _"So if you'd do me a favor, you need to let me go."_

_"Where are you going t' go?"_ He asked quietly,

_"Home… I think I'm going home. Have a nice night."_ I said quietly turning around.

Paul's P.O.V.

He promised himself he wasn't going to let her walk out again. Just as she spun around to leave he threw an arm around her waist; and she froze.

_"We can't leave it at that."_ He spoke softly as to not let his anger get the best of him.

_"I think I have to leave it at that."_ She said quietly;_ "Just let it go._" She was still facing away from him and he kept a firm grip to let her know she couldn't leave.

_"I'm not going t' let it go. Is this how it's going t' be then?"_ He asked in a firmer voice demanding an answer; he gently took his other arm and spun her around so they were standing near enough; her cheeks were flushed and she simply avoided eye contact all together—he could tell she was trying not to get upset.

_"What do you mean?_" She asked in a near cracking voice. He sighed moving his fingers just a bit higher still holding on;

_"I mean '**this**'. Whatever it is that we're doing. We can't trade Lillian back and forth. That's not fair to any of us. What about William and Holly? I think I have th' right—"_ She stopped him there shaking her head repeating what she had said so many times before;

_"They are not yours. Stop trying to drag them into this."_ He studied her face;

_"Rachael, all three of them are in the middle of this."_ She now had a look of pure frustration;

_"So. What do you think we do then? Separate them?"_ She said hotly. He closed his eyes knowing full well this was going to turn into another full blown argument.

_"Rachael, I think a lot of things—hell, I know a lot of things. I know me first name is James, I know me mum died, I know that tore me dad apart, I know when I met you things were really good, I know when you left I went fucking crazy, I know that when I ran into you again there had t' be a reason."_ He had to stop himself from the rant,_ "Rach… I know you what you think of me 'nd you have every right. I fucked up royally and as hard as it is for you to understand, believe me- it is for me too. It has been hell and hasn't stopped. I'm not sure why I mess up everything that is good in my life; Things were going great… fantastic really- and I pissed it for nothing, absolutely nothing."_

Rachael's P.O.V.

Tears were brimming and I felt my very being beginning to crumble, _"I'm a selfish bastard and I know it. Love, I realize what we had, and damn it, I am so sorry about the way I destroyed it. But you've got to understand- I've never wanted to hurt you. When you and Lily came around it was the only thing that had made sense in a long time."_ He stopped for a moment looking at me,_ "A really long time."_

It was the perfect apology. A person couldn't really ask for much more than he was giving.

_"But I also know that separating them all is just about the cruelest thing we could ever do, and I bloody well know that you don't want t' do that."_ I looked around; two people were now watching us out the window; from their viewpoint it looked completely innocent; Paul was just holding onto my waist from a respectable distance. I really didn't want to be here to argue, so I just looked away finishing it off;

_"No. I don't want to separate them. So, I guess we'll share Lily."_ His eyebrows furrowed, and I shrugged; I completely took my emotions out of this; that was the only fair way really.

_"11 o'clock tomorrow."_ I said,_ "You can have Lily."_ I finished off pulling back a little;

"_Have a nice night though. See you._" I said turning around. I had to get the hell out of here. And so I did.

Paul's P.O.V.

He pulled up to her gate at 11 o'clock like he promised. He drove up to the code box punching it in,** '06-18-63'**… it didn't open. He tried again… it still didn't open. The sudden realization hit him like a bucket of cold water to the face- she had changed the code. He stared at the box for a while as it symbolized what the hell he had done. With a heavy heart he finally reached for the button to ring her house- like an absolute stranger. After a few tense moments the gate slowly swung ajar and he pulled in.

He felt like a complete foreigner on this property that by now should've been common ground. He got out of his car walking slowly up to the door where the kids used to swing it open to greet him. For the first time he rang the door bell, he didn't just walk in like usual. After a few moments of waiting Rachael answered with Lily standing at her feet. It was the first time he'd seen her in nearly 3 days. He could tell the five year old had been crying- her eyes were red rimmed and when she looked up at him they shone lifeless and uncaring. He then looked up to Rachael and he felt sick to his stomach. Rachael didn't even look at him; the little girl was sniffling terribly.

_"I want my Willy."_ She sniveled; Rachael gave her a peck on the cheek.

_"He's sick, doll. You're going to daddy's house._" The little girl shook her head,

_"You're coming with me, mummy."_ Rachael took the little girl's hands in her own, shaking her own head. The little girl became visibly irritated; he had never seen the child this uncontrollably upset before.

_"No, no, no, no."_ Lillian stood there nodding her head slightly. Muttering over and over, barely above a whisper, the word **'no'**. _"NO!"_ She shrieked finally stomping her foot. Paul's heart was falling apart- he had caused the pain, she had had to deal with it.

Rachael gave the girl one last kiss.

_"Go to daddy."_ Rachael said quietly, the tiny girl reached far up and grabbed onto Rachael's hand trying to pull her towards Paul.

** She didn't budge.**

Lillian then let go and turned to Paul using his foot as a step stool reaching above her head to grab his free hand trying to pull him towards Rachael.

**He didn't budge. **

The little girl was absolutely livid. She looked between them as if she couldn't believe this was happening. After a tense moment she put her hands up to her ears as if trying to block out the world. Paul stepped forward reaching for her. She shut her eyes and stood there, like stone. The poor girl was crying hysterically, he picked her up under the arms and brought her against his chest burying her face into his neck.

Paul looked back at Rachael; she glanced at him if only for a second before handing her the little girls' overnight bag. Paul reached for the bag slightly brushing Rachael's hand, she pulled back immediately folding her arms. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear before slowly shutting the door.

**She Left Him Standing All Alone.**

Paul watched as she slowly shut the door, Lillian was getting louder. He quickly got over to his car placing her and buckling her up in the backseat.

_"It's okay, love."_ He said quietly. He knew she didn't hear him, she still had her hands clamped over her ears with her eyes scrunched up tight. He got into the car and wordlessly drove the few blocks back to his house. He felt numb; it was sobering watch the mess he had made. He couldn't think straight, his daughter- the tiny little girl that looked exactly like him, the one who could copy him on the piano, the one who was attached by the hip to the little boy who was her best friend, the one who he had missed the first full 5 years with, the one that made him finally want to take responsibility for someone other than his sorry excuse for a man, was irreparably heartbroken.

**She Left Him To His Slab Of Stone.**

When he pulled up to the house he got out of the car and opened the door to get the 5 year old out. Lillian wouldn't open her eyes. She was still huffing; exhausted from wailing so loud, he grabbed her hoisting her up on his hip and brought her into his house, Martha tumbled into the front hall, stopping abruptly sensing something was wrong. Paul put the child down to take his own coat off, the dog sat down eye level to the standing girl and lapped at the tears on her face, Lily didn't move. Paul hung up his coat, and then reached down to unbutton hers. She didn't react; she let him, still keeping her eyes shut tightly as if trying to make the rest of the world disappear. Paul tried to pick her up again, she stayed stiff with her arms clamped to her sides and her face unmoving, he couldn't slide his hands under her armpits to pick her up. He finally stopped trying to pull her arms away from her sides and hoisted her up from the hips, she stayed as stiff as a board- it wasn't easy to hold her like this- in fact it wasn't possible, he was going to drop her. He placed her back on her feet. Looking down at her. She came up just a little bit over his knees, she was tiny. He finally knelt down in front of her she still had her eyes weld shut.

_"Please don't be sad, darlin' girl."_ He asked quietly. Paul moved forward a little bit and wrapped his arms around her, _"Come 'ead, we can go play together."_ The little girl shook her head.

_"You left."_ She said quietly. Paul stroked her soft hair giving her a kiss on the cheek.

_"Honey, daddy didn't leave, I'm right here!"_ The little girl shook her head with her eyes still closed.

_"You're going to leave again._" Paul sat back on his heels,

_"I'm not going t' go anywhere. See, open your eyes, daddy's right 'ere."_ She shook her head. "_Please open your eyes?"_ He tried again. The little girl huffed,

_"No, 'cuz if I see you you're going to go away."_ Paul stroked her soft little cheek; he couldn't believe the pain he had caused.

_"I'm not going anywhere."_ The little girl shook her head with tears still escaping from her shut eyes.

**Her Words Would Fill His Head, You Know?**

Paul stood back up and the little girl allowed herself to be picked up. He brought her upstairs and into his bedroom pulling the covers up and crawling under them. He snuggled her closely, humming quietly. He rocked her back and forth for a while occasionally shushing her. After a bit the little girl calmed down enough to stop crying so he brought her to the bathroom setting her on the counter. He grabbed a washcloth and wiped clearing her sticky crying face. Paul set the washcloth down and leaned over placing a kiss on her cheek. She opened her eyes just a tad, he waited until they were fully open staring up ingenuously at him,

_"Look, there are my pretty girls' eyes!_" Lily didn't react, he picked her back up and brought her downstairs where he had left her overnight bag, Paul took out a pair of footie pajamas and changed the little girl into them. After she was all ready Paul hoisted her back up on his hip with a small smile,

_"See, all better, right?"_ The little girl shrugged. Paul tried his best to get on with it and brought her into the kitchen where he warmed up some hot chocolate. He gave the little girl a small mug sitting her at the kitchen table. He brought out some coloring paper and a few crayons- something that was now in ready supply in his house- and sat it before the little girl.

_"Can you draw Santa what you want for Christmas, we can send it t' him."_ Paul cajoled, the little girl nodded and stood up in her chair to reach the table. Paul watched her for a bit, he hadn't really noticed it before but she was left-handed. He kissed her on top of the head and walked out of the room to give himself a moment. It hit him hard again, he couldn't believe this had happened and had played out like this. He coughed a couple of times fiercely blinking- anything to hold back the emotion. After a moment or two he went back into the kitchen picking the little girl up, sitting down and then replacing her on his lap.

_"Give us a look._" He said. The little girl took a moment longer then set down her crayon holding up the picture. Paul looked at the child's picture.

It was a house. Standing in front were five people. Two of which who were taller than the rest, and three of which who were smaller. The two tallest of the five were holding hands; the child's depiction of them was clearly identifiable. The dark eyes, skinny form, dark hair was unmistakable. She was holding hands with the tallest one. The brown eyes, smile, and dog by his side was unambiguous.

_"Can ya tell me what it is, love?"_ He asked the child. Lily leaned far back into him studying her art work. After a few minutes she pointed to the house,

_"See that's a house."_ Her finger then trailed down to the three shortest people in the picture,_ "And that's Willy, Holly and me."_ Paul noted the hesitation as her finger moved towards the second tallest,_ "And that's mummy."_ Her finger moved an inch to the left,_ "And that's you and Martha."_ Paul looked down at her as she played with her thumbs, _"And me and Willy thinked that you and mummy could live in a house together."_ She nodded a little,_ "So that's what I drawed for Santa to bring me."_ Paul felt his heart shatter. Her simple innocence and the way spoke seemed far beyond her 5 years. Paul looked at the picture for a little longer. He wanted that too.

_"Right then."_ He said quietly, he folded the picture putting it in his pocket, _"I'll send it t' him soon."_ She nodded. Paul picked her back up and walked over to the counter setting her atop of it,

_"Did you eat at mummy's house?_" The little girl avoided his eyes and scrunched her nose and blinked while nodding- he knew she was lying. Rachael did the same thing. He sighed, the little lass was too much like her mum- she didn't eat when she was upset. He decided to make the best of it,

_"Do you want biscuits then?"_ Lillian shrugged her shoulders more or less, he was disappointed. He brushed it off and pulled out a box of them and pulled out a few placing them in her hands, he remembered he had forgotten to lock the front door,

_"Be back in a moment- mind yerself, be careful._" He warned her about falling off of the counter. She nodded and he turned out walking the short hallway and bolting the front door. He paused a moment and turned back to the kitchen; the sight he saw broke his heart. Lily didn't notice him; she was facing away dropping her biscuits on the floor letting Martha eat them. Paul walked in a minute later, deciding not to call her out. It wasn't her fault that she was upset. He smiled at her when she noticed him,

_"Let's go watch the telly, yeah?_" She reached up her arms to be held and he lifted her up again kissing the top of her head and breathing in that still baby-like scent. He went back up to his bedroom and deposited her atop his bed tickling her, this got her laughing and before they knew it she was shrieking in hilarity. Paul chuckled- this was the first time he'd seen her pretty little smile in ages, he kept at it for a while until she was gasping for breath.

_"Be right out."_ He went over to the bathroom and threw on a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt; he couldn't tolerate looking at himself in the mirror- he was the reason the little girl wasn't happy; he couldn't look at that poor excuse for a man. He sighed and put on a happy face going back out into the bedroom and flipping on the television. Paul then crawled back into bed with the little girl cradling her up in his arms; where she fit perfectly. He flipped through the channels and found some old movie then looked down at the little girl for a bit, she was so wonderful. Her attention was fixed solely on the program; he kissed her forehead again tightening his grip.** Wasn't she gorgeous? Wasn't she sweet?** Truly she was love he and Rachael had made from love, right? He played with her hands counting her fingers, he held her hand comparing the size of it to his, and it was dwarfed in comparison. He ran a hand through her silky, dark brown hair- he scanned her face as if looking at it for the first time, she was the mirrored image of himself. **Wasn't she lovely, a love made from love.**

After a bit Paul himself was getting tired- he looked down at the little girl who didn't look like she was going to fall asleep anytime soon. Paul was amazed she'd gone without sleep for so long without crashing.

_"Are you sleepy?"_ he asked, she shook her head looking up at him. He gave her a half-hearted smile,_ "Are you sure?"_ She nodded again. He sighed a little,_ "Why not?"_ She shrugged, he stroked her cheek with an idea popping into his head, almost regretfully he asked, _"Do you want t' ring mummy on th' phone 'nd say goodnight?"_ Lillian looked like she was thinking it over for a moment before nodding in consent. Paul reached over to his side grabbing the telephone and dialed Rachael's house. He waited until he heard her pick up,

_"Hello?"_ She answered,

_"Rach, it's Paul."_ She didn't say anything, he let out a sigh, _"Lily wanted t' say goodnight… is that alright?"_ He waited a moment finally she said,

_"Yeah."_ Paul held the phone to the little girls' ear watching her on the phone, he could hear a murmur of Rachael's voice, whilst Lily listened intently. After a while she finally ended it with a **'love you, mummy.**' Paul took back the phone placing it to his own ear,

_"Rach?"_ He said hoping she hadn't hung up,

_"…Yes?"_ He bit back the feeling to bust out shouting at her to come back over and that he'd make it up to her as best as he could… but he couldn't.

_"How're you?_" He could hear her shift. The little girl was steadily falling asleep against him,

_"I-."_ He could hear the hesitation,_ "I'm alright. You?"_

_"I've been better, Rach. I've definitely been better."_ He really didn't even know where to begin, he decided to break the silence himself, _"Lily just fell asleep."_

_"Really?"_ He could hear a little flit in her voice,

_"You sound surprised?"_ It was quiet for a moment before she answered,

_"It's just you know… She hasn't really slept much here._" He waited a moment for her to go on,_ "She hasn't slept since she came home."_ It was his turn to sigh before asking,

_"Rach, did she eat at yours?_" Another pause,

_"No. Not really. I thought she'd eat at yours."_ He closed his eyes, just listening to her voice; how much he wanted to see her face,

_"I tried giving her something, but when I left the room she gave it t' Martha."_

_"Well… I don't know. You can try again in the morning I guess."_ He nodded into the receiver,

_"Yeah, I will."_ There was another long pause on the line,_ "Rach?"_  
_"Yeah?"_

_"How're Will and Holly?"_

_"Alright."_

_"Is Will feeling better?"_

_"No, he's got a fever."_ He grimaced, as if on cue he could hear William calling for Rachael, she excused herself for a moment and he heard the phone being placed on its side. He could hear the mutterings, and the television going much like it was here. Not 2 minutes later she came back on the line, before she could say anything he jumped in,

_"Can I talk t' him?"_ There was a lengthy pause,

_"I guess."_ He waited a few moments until the little boy came on,

_"Will?"_

_"Hi, daddy."_ The little boy sounded tired,

_"Hey, how're you feeling?"_

_"My tummy hurts."_ Paul frowned feeling upset,

_"I know, it'll get better. Are you taking care of yer mummy for me?"_ He could hear the little boy laugh,

_"No, I'm too little."_ Paul chuckled as well,

_"Are you taking care of Holly for me then?"_

_"Yeah. She's littler than me."_ Paul found it funny how the boy had rationalized it out,

_"Thanks, buddy."_The only response that came was a cough, suddenly Lily stirred in her sleep snapping up,

_"Is that my Willy?"_ She asked suddenly full of life. Paul nodded, she crawled up onto his chest shoving her head next to the receiver,

_"Willy it's me."_ She said loudly the boy responded back to Lily with great enthusiasm,

_"Hi Lily, when did you leave?"_

_"You were sleeping on the couch. Mummy said you couldn't come 'cuz your tummy hurted."_ Paul held the phone so they could both hear, he was amazed at how they were so attached,

_"Yeah. It does. Does yours?"_

_"No it doesn't. Didya find my socks yet?"_

_"No I didn't. Didya find my bear?"_

_"No I didn't. Let's look later."_

_"Okay. I love you."_

_"Okay. I love you too."_ And with that the little girl nestled into Paul's neck, and Paul went back to his conversation chuckling lightly at the brief interlude.

_"Buddy, I'll call you later okay? Go get some sleep."_ He could hear Holly fussing in the background, he felt awful,

_"Okay."_ The little boy said, Holly was getting louder in the background,

_"Will, is that Holly crying?_" Paul asked already knowing the answer,

_"Yep. She cried all day."_ Paul was wary,

"_Do you know why?_" The little boy relayed the story,

_"Mummy said Holly's tummy hurts."_ Paul nodded into the receiver,

_"Does mummy have her right now?"_

_"Yep."_ Paul closed his eyes listening to the baby get louder, wishing he could be there,

_"You'll be okay, yeah?"_

_"Yeah."_ The little boy said quietly,

_"I love you, Will."_

_"Love you too, daddy."_ And with that William hung up. Paul put the phone back on the cradle realizing how silent the house was with only himself and Lily here. He wished he had the house full again, and that all five and them including the dog were in one residence. He shook his head, deciding not to dwell on it, but to instead focus his time on Lily. He switched off the lamp turning down the volume on the telly a touch. Lily was half asleep sucking on one hands' thumb and using the other hand to tug at her ear. He ran his fingers through her hair then pulled his arms tightly around her bringing her up to his shoulder and rubbing her back. Soon enough he felt her go limp and she was dead asleep.

He was awoken during the night to a crying Lily hugging onto his neck, he instantly sat up looking down at her,

_"Whoa, whoa, what's the matter, love?"_ He asked quickly. His response was a crash of thunder outside the window. She was scared of rainstorms. He looked back down at her and she had buried her head into his side, he picked her up bringing her to his shoulder and lying back down,

_"It's alright, love. Daddy's 'ere._" She was still crying a bit, he rubbed her back and hummed a bit, shushing her occasionally. He kissed her and cuddled her closer, another flash of lightening came and the girl dug herself further into his side. He thought about it quick, his mum used to warm up milk for him when he couldn't sleep. Paul got out of bed bringing the little girl down to the kitchen. He warmed up a cup of milk then brought her into the living room laying with her on the couch, the little girl wouldn't drink the milk she just buried her face into his neck every time he offered it to her,

_"Come 'ead, love. You've got t' have something."_ He persuaded, she shook her head,

_"Mummy."_ She whimpered. Paul was upset,

_"You want t' go back t' mummy's house?_" She shook her head,

_"I want mummy here._" He sighed, looking at the clock; it was midnight. He doubted Rachael would still be up,

_"Your mummy's probably sleeping—_" He said quietly another set of tears appeared on the girls face,_ "But we could call her, yes?_" He quickly patched up, the little girl nodded. Paul reached for the telephone on the end table behind him. He quickly dialed Rachael's number, surprisingly enough a voice that was not Rachael's answered,

_"Listen, we're not going to do any interviews—"_ It was Maureen,

_"Maureen?"_ Paul cut off, Maureen instantly stopped talking for a moment,

_"Paul?"_

_"Is—"_ He stopped himself, still confused,_ "Have reporters been calling or something?"_ A less than happy sounding Maureen answered,

_"They've been calling every chance they get."_ Paul's headache returned,

_"How'd they get 'er number?"_ Maureen scoffed,

_"You're asking the wrong person, I've no idea._" Paul nodded,

_"Well anyways, where's Rach?"_

_"She's with the baby. Poor thing 'as been crying all night."_

_"Rachael?"_ He asked hurriedly. Maureen was silent for a few moments.

_"Well—I meant the baby but… never mind, yes the baby has been crying."_ Paul felt sick, he knew Rachael had been crying too- he hated himself.

_"Oh well, Lily wants t' talk t' her._" He said quietly. Maureen made an apprehensive noise,_ "Well, can you at least talk t' her, she's got herself all worked up?"_ He quickly amended,

_"Of course."_ She said. Paul looked down at the little girl,

_"Mummy's sleeping, do you want t; talk t' Auntie Maureen?"_ The little girl nodded, Paul cradled her back up and held the phone back against her ear, he watched as the little girl listened, he could hear little blurbs of Maureen's voice talking in an excited manner—he was thankful how well she handled things. After a bit Lily stopped the crying, listened intently, Paul nonchalantly scooted her up closer to his ear and listened in—Maureen was gossiping about some woman that lived across the street… only Maureen. The little girl obviously had no clue what her Auntie was going on about but was completely taken by the excited and friendly manner in which she spoke.

After a bit the little girl's head started to lean farther back into him and she started tugging at her ears again with her eyes flickering closed. Paul gently took the phone away from Lillian's ear, and brought it up to his own,

_"Mo?_" He said quietly,

_"Is she asleep?"_

_"Yeah, thanks."_

_"No problem._" He leaned his head back,

_"Is Rachael busy still?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Mo… can you tell her t' call when she's not busy?"_

_"I'll tell her."_ Maureen said- not exactly a promise.

_"Ta._" And with that he hung up.

He woke up the next morning, it was another dreary December day- the sky was grey, and a layer of ice was on the window. Lily was cuddled up to him, he didn't want to bring her back to Rachael's', hell if anything he wanted to go to Rachael's pick them all up and bring them back to his house. He thought it over for a while. He finally made up his mind and reached for the phone;

_"Hello?"_ A very exhausted voice came through; he almost didn't recognize it,

_"Rachael?"_

_"Yes, who's this?"_ She said quietly,

_"Paul."_ She was silent, he realized it was his turn to talk; _"I was wondering if I could keep Lily today."_ He blurted out. It was silent for a few moments;

_"I really don't think—"_ She was cut off from a wail on her end; the baby was crying, Paul was surprised- Holly never really cried.

_"Just—"_ Again she was cut off by another cry, before finally saying _"Sure, I have to go, have her back after dinner or whatever."_ Before he could respond she hung up.

He spent the rest of the day with the little girl; playing games and hanging out, she still wouldn't eat—he was determined to at least get her to have a few bites. Mrs. Grady the housekeeper left a casserole for him. He got it ready and set up a plate for the little girl, brought it into the living room; set it on the coffee table before the couch. He then walked over to where the little girl was playing with her doll quietly on the floor; picked her up and brought her over to sit on his lap on the couch. He then took the plate and set it on her lap, she looked at it, looked up at him and shrugged her shoulders ignoring it and instead focusing her attention on the telly. Paul turned off the T.V. then looked back down at the little girl, she glanced back up at him, and attempted to hop off his lap. He firmly held on. She budged forward a few times, then glanced back up at him with a nearing frustrated look.

_"Dinner first._" He said firmly. Lillian looked over at the plate that was now sitting beside them and she shook her head slightly. He nodded a little, and she tried wiggling away again. Paul held on._ "Lil, just have a bite."_ Lillian glanced back up at him with an intensely upset face; shaking her head even more. _"Why not?"_ Paul asked quietly. She shrugged, avoiding his eyes and instead looking at the dog across the room. Paul gently reached a finger under her chin so she was looking him in the eye.

She struggled for a brief moment, but she was staring right at him; it was a cold and uncaring look, a definite emptiness in her eyes and a hint of anger. Nothing more, nothing less. But nonetheless; it was there. The look killed him to say the least;

_"What's the matter, darlin' girl?"_ He queried gently. She studied him up and down, then shrugged. He raised an eyebrow as if willing her to talk; she just huffed and looked away. He bounced her a little;_ "You've got t' tell me what the matter is, sweetheart."_ She glanced back at the plate; made a face and tried to wiggle off of his lap. There really was no match; he kept a firm grip on her and she struggled harder but eventually had to stop.

"_Lemme go."_ She said quietly. Paul shook his head sadly;

_"Tell me what th' matter is."_ She whimpered and kicked her feet a bit; like a caged animal. He held down her legs and pulled her tight;_ "Shhhh, just tell daddy what's wrong."_ He tried to cajole; she only whimpered louder and tried to get down to her own two feet. She relaxed for a moment; suddenly silent and still. Paul was confused; he let loose of his grip a bit to look down at her; she quickly wiggled away and hopped off of his lap. Paul made a grab for her; but she was too swift. He shot up after her; she sped upstairs and he ran as quick as he could after her, as he hit the top of the stairs he saw the door to his bedroom slam shut at the end of the hallway. He sprinted to it; but as he reached for the handle he heard the ping of a metal **'click'.** The five year old had locked him out. He knocked on the door;

_"Lillian, let me in this instant."_ He ordered trying to sound authoritative. She kicked the door from her side in response. Paul tried to jiggle the door handle. _"Lil, I mean it."_ He tried again, there was no kick in response this time. He paced back and forth suddenly frantic; **'His own daughter was locking him out now.'** He strode up to the door again;

_"Let me in."_ But there was still no response.

Lillian's P.O.V.

She didn't want mummy. She didn't want daddy. She wanted Uncle Mike—or someone like that. They never left, only mummy and daddy did. She looked around daddy's room. It looked a lot like mummy's; an enormous bed, a telly, and a bathroom. She looked around for a while; she wanted Willy with her now. They never got to be together anymore. Mummy only let her go with daddy. Not even Holly could come.

She didn't like this anymore. She remembered before she knew daddy; she lived with mummy and Phillip; who she still didn't like; and she got to go play at Nan's house. There was a big window in the place they used to live; and she looked out of it a lot. But then there was the day that she met Daddy. He was at mummy's workplace when Nan dropped her off. She met Uncle John first; he was her favorite; and then she met daddy. She didn't know why she didn't have a daddy before that; she just didn't, William didn't either. She got to stay with her new Uncle John, Uncle Ritchie, and Uncle Georgie the first time that mummy and daddy went for a walk. They showed her instruments; and looked at her a lot she remembered one comment in particular that Uncle Georgie made he said that,** "She's the image of Macca. Can't believe he didn't know; she doesn't even look like Rachael."** She wondered who Macca was for a while; then forgot. And then the day came where the people wouldn't stop taking pictures; and Holly got sick; and William's mummy died. But they got to go to Greece, and everyone was happy again. But then they weren't. Daddy and Mummy didn't talk a lot; they had to stay with Lucy when they would talk; Mummy would say that everything was fine—but if it was fine; why was everyone sad?

She wanted out. So she cried; a lot. And she wouldn't let Daddy into the room; because there was no point.

And she tried to get on top of the bed—but it was too high, so she settled for the floor. And cried some more.

Paul's P.O.V.

It took nearly an hour going out of his mind with worry until he finally managed to unlock the door with a screwdriver. He ran into his room and he found her deep in slumber on the floor. Paul crossed the room quickly and gathered the sleeping baby in to his arms. He could see the tears, still damp on her cheeks, and he felt his heart constrict painfully.

_"Lily, baby, I'm so sorry."_ he groaned, distressed at the sight of the tears on her soft skin. He knew all this was his fault. He'd managed to fuck the kid up psychologically.

Paul tucked her head under his chin and arranged their bodies so that he lay back in the bed with her sleeping body pressed up against him, her head lying on his chest. He brushed the hair away from her pretty eyes, a few hairs clinging to her damp eyelashes. He thought she was the most beautiful thing in the world. Paul hugged her against him, burying his nose in her hair, and inhaling the intoxicating scent of her. He never wanted to let her go. It was at that moment that Paul knew that he was completely in love with her. There wasn't ever a doubt; but it was now crystal clear; he couldn't hurt his baby anymore. She woke up slightly from the squeeze;

_"'M sorry."_ He repeated. She looked at him for a few moments and nodded;

_"Kay._" She gave him a half-assed smile, she forced it; it wasn't normal. He kissed her;

_"Will you eat then?"_ He asked quietly. She shrugged; he'd have to take that for a yes.

He brought her down to the kitchen sitting her on the counter;

_"Right then girl, I'll make you anything you want, what do you want?"_ He asked raising an eyebrow; she shrugged smiling a little; he waited for an answer before rubbing his own stomach; _"I've got t' eat, darlin' girl, I'm starving!"_ He exclaimed, Paul then leaned over kissing her neck noisily; she started laughing too trying to push him away; he caught her hand nibbling her fingers and making her giggle.

_"No biting!"_ She told him with the next one.

_"But I am so hungry 'nd I really like fingers for dinner,"_ he said seriously.

More giggles. _"No fingers!"_ He chuckled trying to kiss her neck again,

_"Are you saving them for brekky then? I like fingers for breakfast, too!"_

That really got her giggling._ "No!"_

_"Toes. I'll eat toes if you like."_ Paul said reaching for her foot. She tried pulling away; but he caught it in time nibbling on her toes; she convulsed with laughter much to Paul's amusement—it was crazy how easily a kid could go from hating you to laughing with you in a matter of minutes. He went at her for a while longer until she was wheezing; and out of breath from laughter;

_"Right then, dinner?_" She finally nodded and he grinned widely;

_"Ice cream."_ She said in final decision. He nodded in agreement—to hell if it wasn't healthy, the kid hadn't eaten in days; if she wanted ice cream she was going to get bloody ice cream.

He went over to the freezer and pulled out two cartons; and a giant bowl; she watched in amazement as he dumped the contents of both into it and grabbed two spoons.

_"Good?"_ He asked. She nodded, and Paul set the bowl on the counter handing her a spoon. He was delighted when she actually started eating; he was getting the hang of this whole 'dad' thing, he glanced back at the clock; it was nearing 6 o'clock. He really didn't want to take her back to Rachael's. So he took a leap of faith looking down at her; _"Do you want t' stay here tonight?"_ He asked, she looked up at him with ice cream slightly smudged on her mouth nodding. He went over to the phone and quickly dialed Rachael's number.

_"Hello?_" She mumbled, Paul pressed the slightest bit closer to the phone,

_"Hey, Rach."_ It was silent for a few moments before she answered,

_"What's up?_" He looked back at the little girl who was now standing on the counter looking down into the bowl of ice cream,

_"I got Lily t' eat."_ He said meandering around the point of the phone call,

"_That's really good."_ She said sincerely. He half-smiled;

_"Rach… well I was wondering if she could stay the night again."_ He blurted out. It was quiet for a long minute and he winced,

_"I don't know, Paul."_ She finally said, he closed his eyes **'Why couldn't they just be bloody together so they didn't have to deal with this whole mess?'**

_"Rach, I'll bring 'er back tomorrow. You have my word."_ He finished.

_"Okay."_ She finally said. And with that the matter was settled. His heart was still filled with pain; he wanted the other kids too. But he didn't ask in fear of starting another lethal argument. He finally sighed; with the weight of the world on his shoulders;

_"What time do you want her back?"_ He asked quietly. On par he could hear the telltale signs of a few whimpers and a long howl—once again the baby was crying. Paul listened hard; he really hadn't heard Holly cry in-person as much as he'd heard her over the phone.

_"Bring her back whenever you get tired of her."_ Rachael responded the baby kept a long whimper going, he rubbed his forehead,

_"Rach, I'm never going t' get tired of her."_

_"Paul… just… I don't know."_ She said weakly; and the baby's cries were steadily getting louder, he felt like crying.

"Rach… just tell me exactly when." She sighed into the phone; and the tension rose;

_"You tell me."_ She finally said. He winced as a particularly long sob was let out,

_"Tomorrow night."_ He said in final.

_"Alright then. Tell her I love her._" She said cutting it off.

_"Rach—"_ She hung up already.

So he did.

* * *

**A/N: Alright, review it, suggestions, all that stuff, thanks for reading!**


	48. Chapter 48

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul watched as Lily ate a bite more then looked up from the ice cream to glance at him. He smiled at her giving off the impression that nothing was wrong. She smiled slightly back before putting down the spoon and looking back up at him.

_"One more bite?"_ He asked, she looked back down at the bowl apparently having lost all enthusiasm to eat. She shrugged shyly as a **'no'**. He frowned, she hadn't eaten much. He counted back the days—Mike had said she practically hadn't eaten the week she was there. It'd been three days since she'd been back—10 days in total; with only a bit of ice cream. Hell, he was new at this whole** 'dad thing'** but he figured that this probably was not good. He sighed rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt; pushing his watch just a bit farther back. Lillian was watching him he, stood in front of her brushing the hair out of her eyes;

_"We need t' have a talk, darlin' girl."_ Paul said seriously. The little girl looked up at him innocently; he pulled over a stool to sit in front of her. He then reached out to hold her hands; _"Why aren't you hungry?_" He said eyeing her for any hint of a stir. She shrugged slightly. He raised an eyebrow; She looked away before he insisted further, _"Do you feel okay?"_ She nodded, _"You sure?_" She nodded in the affirmative again. He finally sighed. There really wasn't any point in pushing the subject—if she didn't eat tomorrow he'd have to force her to.

_"What'd you want t' do then, darlin' girl?"_

_"Play."_ She said, Paul chuckled.

_"What do you want t' play?"_ She looked thoughtful as he wiped her face with a rag;

_"Blocks."_ He nodded wiping off her hands then took her off the counter setting her on the floor. She scurried out to the living room apparently going for her overnight bag. It pained him a little bit knowing this was only a temporary thing. She searched around in the bag for a bit; apparently having forgotten to bring them. She looked back at him with a pure look of disappointment;

"_No blocks."_ She informed him. He frowned glancing around the room for a moment; sure it was comfortable, but there weren't really any playthings. She'd brought her doll, he had crayons, but that was about it. He thought for a moment;

_"Want t' come play piano?"_ She nodded, and he held out a hand for her to latch onto. They went upstairs to the music room and he hoisted her onto his lap whilst he played. He went through some of his songs; she watched intently before he put his own hands down,

_"Your turn._" He said. She nodded and he watched as she hesitantly picked out a few keys without being directed to do so. He recognized the tune—but couldn't exactly put a name to it. She couldn't reach every key due to her tiny hands; but it was actually very good. She got through most of it before she stopped and looked up at him;

_"I forgotted the rest."_ He was still amazed that the five year old had done it on her own;

_"Where'd you learn that, love?"_

_"I copied mummy."_ He raised an eyebrow;

_"Mummy plays the piano?"_ She nodded immensely,

_"Sometimes._" Paul was surprised; he didn't know that.

_"Right then, can you copy daddy?_" She nodded; and Paul smiled—he played a few chords and waited for her. She copied it immediately looking up at him. Paul went again adding more and more chords; she copied it exactly—except for the few keys that she couldn't reach. After a bit, he was more than impressed. The little girl was pretty damn good. He could tell that she was getting sleepy though; her eyes would drift and she was tugging on her ears; Paul brought her back downstairs and before she even touched the couch—she was out.

Paul knelt next to her and watched her sleep for a while; he wondered what she looked like as a baby, probably a cute little thing—it still ripped him apart inside that he wasn't there; would she resent him later? As far as he knew, Rachael simply hadn't explained anything to the little girl as to why she didn't have a dad and then suddenly she did, and now that he and Rachael weren't together; he'd probably have to explain it. How could he explain it though? It wasn't a divorce exactly—hell, it felt like it. It was an awkward custody agreement. Lillian let out a huff in her sleep and turned away from him into the cushion, he kissed her hair and stood up looking around—he didn't have a thing to do. He was on break from the studio until after Christmas, his kid was asleep, the dog was napping by the backyard, and it was pretty darn quiet. He shuffled around for a while; picked up a book, put it down; made a cup of tea, decided he didn't want it; didn't feel like having a ciggie, he was restless; there wasn't anyone to talk to, or hang out with, or take care of.

He finally decided what he was going to do, he picked up the phone quickly dialing; and waited,

_"Hello?"_ She answered,

_"Hey, Rach, it's Paul."_ It was silent for a moment;

_"What's up?"_ She asked almost quietly; he felt a rip through his chest;

_"Err… well… Lily ate a bit…"_ He said trying to think of an answer,

_"That's really good."_ She repeated; Paul looked around the empty kitchen trying to think of a way to keep her on the line,

_"Yeah, how's William?"_ He asked spouting the first thing off of his head,

_"Still sick."_ She answered shortly, he rubbed at the bridge of his nose,

_"How's th' baby?"_

_"Fine."_ She clipped, Paul knew her patience was wearing thin, he glanced to the clock as it read 9 o'clock.

_"That's great."_ He said running a hand through his hair, he was about to say something to keep him on the line before she said,

_"I've got to go, tell Lily I love her."_ She finally said ending it, Paul almost slapped himself on the forehead for being so stupid—why couldn't he converse normally?

_"Rachael."_ He called out trying to save the conversation;

_"Yes?"_ Thank god she hadn't hung up;

_"When I drop Lily off tomorrow, can we at least… you know, talk?"_ Her answer was quick, short and a step off;

_"I don't really have anything to say. Just bring her back at seven."_ And with that she hung up. The emotion in her voice was gone, there wasn't anything there anymore—no warm words, or joke, not even a hint of tone—just silent regret, and disappointment at something he'd thought should have lasted years.

Rachael's P.O.V.

Things were not going well at all. William had a fever, Holly suddenly turned into a crying monster, and I was bleeding. You know when you could hear something is wrong just by the tone of a persons voice? I did. I called the doctor last night to ask if I should come in knowing something wasn't right—you just don't bleed for no reason, he said if it doesn't stop within the next day or two, I'd definitely have to come in. Lucy was on break for a few days so I decided to wait until then to go in; I was currently dealing with William—who was first, sick as all hell; puking every half hour, and secondly was growing steadily irritated from Holly's constant crying. He wasn't one to complain though, he'd just bury his head under the couch pillow and wait until she was done. I had no idea what in the world was wrong with Holly though, it seemed that basically overnight she'd turned into a crying wreck. Every hour or so she'd start up again; it would take nearly twenty minutes just to get her calmed down enough to go back to bed.

I was in way over my head; and on top of it all Paul had Lillian. I mean I guess I could have figured out that it was going to end up like this—I just didn't like the fact that she was away from me, I wanted her around all the time. It killed me a little bit though; because every time I'd look at her, I'd see Paul. She didn't look a thing like me; she had his hair color, his eyes, his nose, his everything, down to the slight droop of her eye.

I heard a long howl and a little screech, Holly was back crying. This was insane.

Paul's P.O.V.

He woke up the next afternoon to a little girl scrambling to sit on his lap. He rubbed his eyes; he must've fell asleep on the lounge chair; he then looked down at the little girl who was still half asleep and smiled,

_"G'morning, darlin' girl."_ She responded by shoving her head into his chest farther still trying to sleep. He gave both himself, and her a bit longer to wake up before finally stretching and yawning,

_"Right then, darlin' girl, what'd you want for brekky?"_ She just shook her head and mumbled,

_"Not hungry."_ He sighed. He didn't want it to come down to this,

_"I didn't ask that, love, you have t' eat something though."_ She just looked up at him in disbelief and muttered a,

_"Nah, I'm not hungry."_ He sighed;

_"I know that. But you still have t' eat."_ She just blankly stared at him. He brought her into the kitchen setting her on the counter and opened the fridge to grab butter, and to the pantry to grab bread; and then set in on the toaster. When he was finally done, he handed her a slice with a look that clearly said **'please?'** She didn't take it though, she truly didn't want it. It broke his heart to say the least. He put it down on the counter and just looked at her. She had to eat something. He'd thought by now she'd be hungry enough to have a bite of anything. He didn't have a clue what to do anymore; it wasn't like he could force feed her. And begging certainly wasn't going to help. So he let her off of the counter to go pet Martha and returned to the phone;

_"Rach?"_ He said in surrender,

_"Yes?_" She answered shortly.

_"Lily won't eat anymore."_ It was silent for a long while before he continued,_ "Rach, it's been like 10 days, that can't be good."_ It was quiet for a long time before she answered,

_"No, you're right, it's probably not good."_ He glanced back to the little girl who was petting the fluff of the dog;

_"What do we do?"_ He asked quietly—hell, he had no clue, there wasn't a handbook to being a dad.

_"Uhmm…"_ He heard Rachael trying to think—it suddenly hit him, she hadn't a clue either. Neither of them really knew how to parent—in reality they both were still kids themselves, bullshitting, and making it up as they went.

_"I think—"_ She started, but then had to stop. A thin wail interrupted her, Holly was crying again, he heard her mutter something that sounded like a weak **'fantastic'**, but a sad idea entertained in his mind;

_"Rachael, she's going to have to go t' the doctor."_ He said making a final decision, it was a velar silence,

_"Alright, then drop her off I'll—"_ He shook his head quickly, she had enough to deal with,

_"I'll take her."_ He stated, not even questioning his decision,

_"Paul—"_ She tried to protest but he quickly cut in; he'd have to show her he was responsible enough,

_"Rachael. I'll take her."_ He stated a second time. There was still an extremely awkward strain between them. A thing flashed into his head—what would it be like ten years from now? Would they still be in this gauche situation? Would Rachael find someone to replace him—would he find someone to replace her? He didn't think he could… he knew she could hell—she'd been married once, and living with another man. He wondered if she'd get married to someone else, and what the kids would call **'him'**? Would Lily call **'him'** dad too? A pinch of nerves hit Paul, it was definitely a possibility that Holly and William would, Rachael had already set him straight that he definitely was not their father and he had no right to see them.

_"Fine."_ She said, and the answer brought him back from his brief moment of insanity. She went on to tell him here the pediatricians office was, and what she needed filled out on forums, besides that he basically had to roll it alone and she hung up. He looked back to the little girl who was being nudged around by the dog that kept trying to knock her over following her 'herding' instincts. Lillian laughed a little trying to walk but the dog nudged her in the back wagging her stub of a tail. Paul watched in amusement for a few minutes before remembering what he had to do,

_"Hey, Lil."_ He called grabbing her attention, she spun around coming face to face with the mop of a dog who licked her, and she giggled then looked over at Paul still keeping a hand on the dog—who was lapping up the attention. _"D'ya want t' come with daddy t' talk t' a doctor?"_ He asked she looked confused for a moment before shaking her head, Paul came up with an alternative; _"D'ya want t' eat then?"_ Again the little girl shook her head, with a raised eyebrow. He sighed looking down at her, the mirrored image of himself, he really didn't want it to have to come to this—but she needed to eat.

_"Well then, if you're not going t' eat, you're going t' have to come with me t' the doctors."_ He said quietly watching for any hint of a reaction. She just looked at him with cool appraisal, a candid stare really—something she must've gotten from Rachael, it was mesmerizing to say the absolute least; making him totally forget what he'd just asked. He looked into her eyes for a moment; a lovely brown, surrounded by incredibly long eyelashes; the left eye had an almost undetectable droop to it. But as to avoid having to answer the alternative she turned around patting the dog and began to make her way back to the living room,

_"Woah, little lady, come back here, we're not through talking."_ He called out. She stopped. The dog stopped as well and she looked back over her shoulder at him raising an eyebrow. He did as well, and she shook her head continuing her walk. Paul sighed and looked at the clock—it was nearing 11 in the morning.

He went about getting breakfast for himself, and the dog, got ready for the day, then reconvened in his mission to Lily. He went to the girls bag and pulled out a little dress calling her over,

_"Lily come over 'ere."_ Her head popped around the corner as she spotted the outfit and shook her head, Paul raised an eyebrow confused;_ "You can't wear your jammies all day, darlin' girl."_ He said slowly; she nodded her head—and so it was on; a battle of the wills, between a Beatle and a five year old. He raised an eyebrow; _"Oh really then? Are you going t' go naked?"_ She narrowed her eyes at his sarcastic comment and nodded slowly. Paul scoffed; if she wanted a battle, she was going to bloody get it. She ignored him and threw off her shirt and duck pajama pants walking in the stark back to the living room just to spite him. Paul groaned—this kid had the will of him and Rachael combined. He had to laugh at the fact that she was completely comfortable going bleak.

Just as he was about to call her back the gate buzzed; he glanced out the window immediately recognizing George's car. He let him through; careful not to let any gatebirds, reporters or fans tagged along.

George's P.O.V.

He pulled into Paul's drive. He was surprised to find more reporters and fans than the norm—he guessed it was true then. Something had been badgering his mind lately, a few nights ago at the charity event he was forced to attend, a rather sloshed John pulled him off to the side to inform him that Rachael was pregnant. It shocked George to no end; usually he stayed out of other people business thinking it was lackluster, and trivial—but for some reason this had captured his attention completely. A few hours ago their new manager, Allen Klein, had called him in to sign more bloody papers; George had found a stack of papers that Paul had yet to sign and quickly volunteered to drop them off. He was now presently in front of his house on the way up the stairs; to an awaiting Paul who he greeted quickly,

_"'Lo, Paul."_ He said with a half smile as his friend held the door, seeming that his hands were full of documents.

_"'Lo, George._" He greeted in return as the two men went inside. Paul looked the papers over as George explained the meaning;

_"Allen said that you haven't signed yet."_ Paul looked strained in George's eyes. He looked exhausted; and irate, and even the slightest bit hurt. Drunken John had also informed him that Paul and Rachael were in their downfall following the 'Dot Incident', which had surprisingly been denied in the papers; Dot was being called a liar, and a gold digger. George decided not to take side in that disagreement; Paul was wrong for doing what he did, and Dot was wrong for cashing in on the story.

Paul led him into the kitchen were tea was already on; George made himself at home whilst Paul sat down to sign the stack of papers he then heard a **'whump'** and a small half-laugh, half-**'ouch'**, from the living room Paul put down the pen looking over to the door entranceway;

_"You okay?"_ He called out; and got a small,

_"Yep."_ In response. George recognized the voice; it was the little girl. George nodded over to the entrance and Paul nodded in consent. George walked over and nearly busted out laughing when he arrived in the room. The little girl was stripped naked, except for her underwear with one of Paul's socks tied around her head in a native American fashion.

She greeted him with an adorable smile; George chuckled.

_"'Lo, love, where 're yer clothes?_" He asked chuckling at how innocent she looked; she was a bit too skinny though—like she hadn't eaten well enough, the little girl pointed at a suitcase bag on a chair in the room, George laughed a little harder—Paul definitely had a crazy little bird here.

_"Why aren't you wearing them?"_ The little girl shrugged, George knelt down and held out his arms for a hug, she complied quickly sprinting over and hugging him tightly; he held her for a few moments before holding her at arm's length; _"Are you havin' fun with yer dad?"_ The little girl smiled and replied with a small;

_"Yeah._" He chuckled; this little bird definitely had a way of making a day brighter. He spotted a dress on the floor; and pointed to it, "_Is that yours?"_ She nodded,_ "It's very pretty,"_ He said,_ "Let's see it, girl."_ She walked over and picked it up, pulled it on, and attempted to zipper up the back; and ended up walking around in a circle until he walked over to help. George hastily zipped it up then spun her around, _"Oh my, it looks as though we 'ave a princess here."_ She laughed a little, smiling even brighter. He chuckled and took the sock off of her head;

_"There we have it, Lady Lillian!"_ He exclaimed she smirked and winked at him—George let out a chuckle; she was a cheeky little thing too. He picked her up hugging her tightly whilst he glanced around the room finally noticing that in fact it was just her here, the other children had to be at Rachael's. This had to be lonely for her, and to add to that fact it seemed the only toys here were a doll, and small stuffed animal sheepdog. He felt bad for her,

_"George, I—"_ Paul appeared in the room holding the stack of papers, with an amazed look on his face; then quickly shook his head looking away from the little girl and back to him, _"How in th' world did you get 'er dressed?"_ George slowly raised an eyebrow shrugging,

_"She put it on when I asked 'er to._" George said relaying the story. Paul just glanced down at the little girl still in Georges arms staring at him with an innocent look; George chuckled giving her a kiss on the cheek and handing her over to Paul,

_"Oh."_ Paul said quietly with the confused yet amazed look still plastered upon his face, _"Well, I signed th' papers, then."_ George nodded getting to the kitchen and picking them up before walking back giving the girl one last kiss on the cheek bidding goodbye.

Paul's P.O.V.

Paul was amazed at the fact that George had gotten the girl dressed in less than two minutes; he glanced down at her, her attention was focused on the telly. He bounced her a little getting her attention;

_"Ready t' go?"_ He asked gently, she shook her head with a sudden frown appearing on her face.

_"I don't want to go."_ She pouted. He frowned sadly giving her one last chance,

_"You're going t' have t' eat something then."_ He said insistently. She shook her head quickly wiggling to try to get out of his arms.

_"No. I want t' go to mummy's then."_ She said tetchily. Paul's heart shattered—and so it began, she was learning to pit parent against parent. He kept a austere stand though,

_"You're going t' have t' eat either here 'er mummy's house, love."_ He said trying to keep his composure. She shook her head quickly getting angry.

_"No."_ She huffed. He shrugged grabbing the car keys.

He'd managed to get her buckled in despite her refusals and followed the directions Rachael had given him.

Over the car ride there, she'd quickly fallen asleep, and he picked up her sleeping form shielding her from the cold and brought her into the office. When the warm rush of air met them she immediately woke up half-dazed and bewildered,

"_No."_ She mumbled pushing her head into his neck; he sighed almost in tears;

_"Yeah. Sorry, love."_ He mumbled into her hair entering the office. The secretary had a look of surprise upon her face when he signed in sitting back in a waiting chair. With a short wait, they were instructed to enter the examination room. The little girl had absolutely no energy left; she was trying to lift up her head but she kept needing to be held up—so he did, the doctor came in with a smile; and a look of surprise at him,

_"'Lo, I'm Dr. Peters."_ He introduced himself, Paul shook his hand,

_"Paul McCartney."_ He said likewise, the man looked down at the little girl in his arms,_ "This is Lily."_ Paul sad bouncing the little girl again, she merely scowled way too tired to even lift her head, the doctor frowned slightly noticing something was off,

_"What seems to be the matter?"_ The doctor asked, Paul numbly went on,

_"She hasn't eaten in about a week."_ He mumbled admitting defeat. The doctor went on to ask a few more questions; most of which Paul had no clue, all he could answer was her birth date, mothers name, address, and that was about it. He had no clue about any allergies, any previous medical history; anything about Rachael's side to last bit. The doctor gave him a confused look when he didn't know much; but nonetheless went on with it. Lily was half awake now complying when the doctor took her height—3 feet even, and her weight—only 27 pounds way below average. Paul felt horrible, she had a sad look upon her face looking up, at him that he read as saying** 'why are you doing this to me?'**, the doctor went on talking calmly, using funny faces and running other tests, at last he finished up returning a stethoscope around his neck and smiled at the little girl; apparently telling her she could go back to Paul, then left the room. She glanced back at him with her lower lip protruding, looking like she wanted nothing more than to leave; she was nearing tears when Paul held out his arms for her. She shook her head refusing to come near him. He bit his thumb looking at her then reached out again; trying not to break down. Reluctantly she came over and he scooped her up.

_"Sorry, sorry, sorry."_ He mumbled into her soft hair; she cried into his neck overwhelmingly exhausted and completely done with the entire situation. He rocked her back and forth taking a seat on the provided chair;

_"Sorry, baby."_ He apologized again, she looked back up at him with a look that made his heart melt;

_"Don't cry, little darlin'."_ He consoled kissing her cheeks in desperation, _"See, it wasn't so bad, was it?"_ She sniffled again and he wiped her nose on the sleeve of his shirt, _"You're okay,"_ He reassured pulling back on her little winter coat and zippering it up for her; within seconds the doctor returned;

_"Alright, then."_ He said glancing through the papers;_ "There doesn't seem t' be anything wrong. But—if she loses anymore weight, you're going to have to bring her to the hospital. So. She has to eat."_ The doctor bid goodbye with a final side note to Paul, _"Try peanut butter, my daughter loves it."_ He said with a chuckle. Paul smiled in return, and he left.

_"Want t' go home?"_ He asked, she nodded immensely. And so they went.


	49. Chapter 49

**A/N: Hey guys! Read it, review it, all that, thanks for taking a look! :)**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He carried the sleeping bundle of Lily into his house; ignoring the press outside. He then glanced at the wall clock grimacing when it said 5 o'clock. Lily was due back at Rachael's by seven. He looked around the kitchen deciding this was it. He set her on the couch to finish sleeping; then went back to make dinner. He warmed up the casserole and took out the ice cream, he'd give her a choice. He brought it out to the living room setting it down on the coffee table then sat on the couch picking up the little girl. She awoke slightly with droopy eyes; Paul gave her a minute then pointed to the table;

"_Which_?" He said, she pointed to the casserole, and he brought the plate up sitting it on her lap; she picked up the fork and took a sleepy bit, chewing slowly. Paul was ecstatic, she took a few more; still dead tired. Paul watched her slow down, and put down the fork. He frowned, then picked up the fork for her holding up another forkful to her mouth, she accepted it, with her eyes still drooping. He got her to eat the most part of it, after a bit she turned her head away from the fork and said,

"_No more_." He nodded slowly and asked,

"_One more bite?_" She took a half-bite more and with that she was officially done. He hugged her tightly; and she smiled with an adorable sleep-stricken smirk. He chuckled putting her back down and pulling a blanket over her tucking it in tightly. He then went around packing up her stuff; it pained him to no end—he didn't want her to leave. He wanted to play it selfish, and keep her forever. He collected the few outfits she'd had and the two toys she brought, it was a temporary thing her staying here, he didn't want it to be temporary. Now he was frustrated, when he got over there, he and Rachael were definitely going to figure this out. He couldn't live like this. He needed Lily here all the time, hell, he needed all the kids and Rachael here all the time.

He finally zipped up the little bag. This was fucking insane, he nearly shook with anger as he looked at it, this was his kid—she belonged here. He paced around for the next half hour having not a clue what to do; he couldn't steal her, hell, he loved Rachael too much to do that to her, but he didn't want to switch Lily back and forth. Goddamn it, he wanted William and Holly too, they belonged to him. If even Rachael insisted that they weren't—in truth they were, William called him daddy and Holly was his littlest baby.

When the time finally rolled around to leave he thought about not showing up—that wouldn't be fair to either Lily or Rachael; Lily needed a mum and Rachael was just that. He thought about calling to ask Rachael for another night with her—but it'd already been 3 days and 2 nights; 2 more days and 1 more night than they'd originally agreed to. He was trying not to be selfish, but how could he not? A near thought flashed through his head—what if they asked Lily who she wanted to live with? He felt sick from that thought. John had once divulged to him that his parents had done that, and it tore him to pieces.

He didn't want to miss a single thing. He returned to the dim living room and knelt back next to her; he listened to her breathing, watched the small smile she had on whilst she was far away dreaming; he didn't think he could tear himself away from her later; he didn't want to miss a thing. Not a single smile; or one of her cute little kisses; he'd already missed enough as it was. His watch now read 7:01. He was late. He sadly picked up the still sleeping baby and grabbed her bag meandering out the front door. Paul took the longest possible route to Rachael's; but could only go so far considering she only lived 15 minutes away. He pulled up to her gate; it was late enough for the press to be gone; he rang the house. He waited a few minutes but the gate didn't open. He tried again; he knew someone was home—the lights were on and he could see slight shadows in the upstairs window. After the third time he reached back touching Lily's leg;

"_Hey, Love_." He called out; she mumbled a '**mmph**?',

"_Do you know which buttons mummy pushes to open the gate?_" She nodded;

"_She saided that you press the green button lots if it's broken._" Paul raised an eyebrow; following her instructions and pressed the green button near the top corner of the pad many times. Sure enough it opened and Paul pulled in.

He got out of the car first shivering from the frigid December nights air, then pulled Lily out of the backseat opting to carry her and be as close as possible. Lily looked apprehensive like she already knew what was going to go down. Her grip tightened around his neck as they got nearer to the door; she pressed her tiny cheek against his. Paul kissed her cheek stopping short of the door to ring the bell, they waited a few minutes and he bounced her against his hip in order to keep from freezing. When at last there was an answer; it was a very sleepy little boy in disheveled pajamas dragging a blanket behind him with a sickly look splashed across his face. He grinned up at them slightly with his cheeks flushed in fever. A rush of things hit Paul at once. First, the warm rush of air from the house, then Rachael's perfume, next was a baby crying and the telly going in the background. Paul put Lily down kneeling in front of the little boy pulling him into a tight hug whilst feeling his forehead which was burning up. Paul held him for a moment;

"_Hey, buddy_." He said quietly. The boy mumbled a hello into his neck. Paul let go as Lily wiggled her way in, the two grabbing each other in a frantic hug,

_"Hi, Willy, hi, hi, hi_." She said in threatening tears with extreme anxiety. They were squeezing each other tightly relieved at seeing each other—it ripped Paul apart, they shouldn't have been separated. The little boy looked relieved to say the least holding onto his sister. Paul got up shutting the door and looking around for a moment,

"_Where's mummy?"_ He said glancing every which way. His answer was the baby crying again. He grimaced looking down at William who was rubbing his forehead;

"_Oh."_ He said, "_Willy, come 'ere."_ He said kneeling down again. The boy complied stumbling over. Paul felt his forehead again, gave him a kiss, and picked him up walking to the living room. He quickly tucked the boy in sitting with him on the couch for a moment;

"_How long 'as Holly been crying?_" He asked nonchalantly trying not to sound too worried. The boy looked irate; but he was too sweet of a kid to complain;

_"Since forever. Mummy went up there a long time ago."_ He said, Paul nodded tucking the little boy in; and grabbing Lily who had followed them in, tucking her right into his side. The two looked to be at peace when he did that. Paul then turned around and turned up the volume on the telly loud enough to drown out the baby's crying.

_"I'll be back, yeah?_" He asked the children. They nodded watching him ascend upstairs in suit of the crying. He got up to the second floor; the sound getting louder with each step. He waited outside the baby's room for a moment finally taking a deep breath before he walked into the source of the crying. As soon as he opened the door the wailing escalated, he noticed a very upset Rachael trying to calm down an equally upset baby. She was facing the window and Holly was laying against her shoulder, Rachael was bouncing gently in efforts; but it was no use- the baby kept crying. Paul walked in, and she didn't notice, he came up behind her putting a hand on her back, she spun around quickly. The look was instant- she was in way over her head. Holly was now screaming, they both looked down at her, Paul put a hand on her little back looking back at Rachael;

_"What's wrong?"_ Rachael shook her head, she had a terrified look in her eyes,

_"I don't know."_ The baby's face was red and she kept a constant shriek going,

_"How long 'as she been at it?"_ Holly let out another particularly loud sob, he and Rachael both winced,

_"On and off since the last time you called."_ Paul ran the numbers in his head; 9 o'clock last night, until 8 o'clock tonight.

_"Christ that's nearly a day."_ She nodded, the baby locked her body and continued bawling her eyes out. Rachael frowned, Paul studied her face quietly- she had the dark circles from lack of sleep, her eyes seemed dead, and he skin was still a sickly pale, he could see she'd been crying only a bit ago- there was a salty trail leading down her cheek. It looked as though she may cry again. Paul quietly held out his arms for the baby, at first Rachael looked reluctant,

_"I've got her."_ He said firmly. After a few moments Rachael nodded slowly and Paul gently took the baby from her.

_"Go 'ead and lie down, I've got 'er."_ He ordered steadily. She sighed watched him for a moment, then let go of the baby, and nodded walking out of the room. Paul turned his attention down to the child he was holding in front of him.

_"What's th' matter, baby?"_ He crooned. He pulled her to his shoulder - he'd never really seen her cry before, except for the time she had croup. He took her over to the changing table and swaddled her up in a blanket. He picked her back up and started bouncing her whilst walking around the room.

_"Shhh. It's all right, love."_ He cajoled. Paul started humming whilst rubbing her back in small circles. He eventually came up with a pattern- he'd bounce her walking slowly across the room and repeat it the other way. It took about a half an hour but eventually the baby quieted down somewhat. Paul took a seat on the rocker next to the window and finally took a breath for himself. A thought suddenly took hold of him—he remembered the few times he and John saw Julian as a baby. Cyn had told John to hold him up against his skin to stop the crying. Paul quickly undid the few top buttons of his shirt, un-swaddled Holly from the blanket, skillfully took off the onesie and held her against his chest. He rocked the chair for a bit of time and miraculously she stopped. He'd have to remember to thank Cyn for that.

The baby was now completely silent looking up at him as if she didn't recognize him. He pecked her on the cheek smoothing back her soft hair,

"_There's me girl, what's th' fuss, huh?"_ The baby was still letting out little huffs and whimpers trying to catch her breath. Paul gave her a few minutes and eventually her breathing slowed and the snivels and wheezes stopped. Paul managed to get her nappy changed, and found a bottle on the little table next to the bed. He sat back as she drank watching her, the baby was still studying him from behind the bottle, he feared the worst,

_"You remember me, dontcha Hol's?"_ The baby continued analyzing and he frowned just a bit. He rocked a little, she finished half of the bottle and decided she didn't want anymore. She had a slightly apprehensive, confused look upon her face. Paul's frown deepened,_ "It's me, it's daddy, Hol's. Remember?"_ He sighed, smoothing her hair down,

_"Sorry I've been gone, love. I've got some explaining t' do, huh?"_ He continued rocking on the chair getting comfortable,_ "Well you see, darling, your mummy and I had a row. I made a huge mistake. It was my fault. But, I want t' make it up to her."_ He felt a knot in his chest deciding to tell her everything,_ "I don't want you guys t' grow up without me._" Paul moved the baby back up to his shoulder rubbing her back,_ "I'm going crazy on my own, Hol's. Your Uncle Ritchie had t' come and straighten me out a few times."_ He shook his head planting another kiss on her face, _"And I'm sorry I didn't get a chance t' see you since before you went to your Granddad's house. You're still my little baby, okay?"_ Paul affirmed this, he rocked for a while longer. He brought her across the hall to the bathroom; giving her a quick bath—he realized this was the first time he had given an infant a bath—he managed to do a pretty good job at it. He wrapped her up in a towel waiting until she dried off then put her in a clean onesie.

Paul made his way downstairs with the now-calm, fed, and washed Holly. He found William in the living room peacefully sleeping on the couch; Lillian was sitting next to the couch playing with blocks. She smiled a bit when he walked into the room, Paul knelt down next to her,

_"Where's Mummy?_" Lily pointed across the room, through the door, across the kitchen and into another sitting room, he could vaguely see an outline of a figure in the dark on one of the couches sleeping. He nodded and sat the baby down next to Lily. He reached up on the couch and gently pulled the little boy from it- to his shoulder cuddling him. Paul wanted to spend as much time with them as possible. He watched the little girl for a while playing. Holly got tired and tried standing up to toddle over to him. She fell twice; she still couldn't get the hang of standing up and toddling but instead opted to crawl over to sit on his lap. She wasn't terribly good at crawling either and had to scoot her way over to him; Paul made room for her- leaning back against the couch; Eventually Lily got tired as well; and once again he made room. He chuckled to himself wondering how the hell he was going to do this with five kids.

Around an hour later he heard the gate panel give off a slight beep, minutes later the front door opened an a rather large Greek man came in shutting it from the cold,

_"Cold as shit."_ He mumbled. He pulled off his coat and stepped into the kitchen, Paul watched quietly, he recognized him, it was Theodore. The older gentleman peeked into the sitting room where Rachael was sleeping, stood there for a moment scratching his head, then spun around looking straight at Paul. His eyebrows raised as he surveyed the situation before walking over,

_"Hey."_ He said looking at the sleeping children splayed all over him, Paul nodded,

_"Hello, sir._" Teddy chuckled stepping into the living room,

"_Is that Walter's asshole still here?_" Paul was confused,

_"Christian?"_ Teddy nodded walking over and took a seat on a chair opposite from Paul, and the pile of children. Paul was taken aback,

_"Didn't know he was here."_ Teddy let out a breath leaning back into the chair and putting his feet up on a ottoman,

_"Told Rachael I didn't want that asshole around the kids, I came to kick him out."_ Paul was still dead-confused.

_"Rach didn't say anything to me._" Teddy nodded and rubbed his forehead,

_"Heard you two have been having a time of it."_ Paul nodded slightly feeling ashamed. Teddy shook his head looking at the children, _"How bad has it been?"_ Theodore asked quietly. Paul gulped pulling William's slipping head back to his shoulder and hoisting Holly up just a bit higher,

_"We've been switching off with Lillian… 'aven't got t' see William or Holly until today."_ He confessed. Teddy raised his eyebrows,

_"Jesus, I—"_ Neither man noticed but Rachael walked into the room, Teddy instantly stood up for a hug, and a kiss. Rachael looked over to Paul and the sleeping pile of little people then back to Teddy,

_"Why are you here?"_ She asked confusedly. Teddy scratched the back of his neck,

_"Where's Walters?"_ He said firmly. Rachael looked him up and down,

"_Left yesterday afternoon."_ Teddy shot Paul a** 'god help me'** look then turned back to Rachael giving her a stare.

_"Good."_ He said firmly. Rachael looked back up at the older man,

_"Why are you here then?_"She queried,

_"You know why."_ She silently evaluated them, Paul saw she didn't start an argument; she just accepted it as an answer. She glanced over at him for a moment, then back to Teddy;

_"You staying?"_ She asked. Teddy nodded, Rachael went back over to the kitchen, Teddy glanced back at Paul with a wide-eyed expression;

_"Jesus Christ and a half; she looks like the walking dead."_ Paul was a little taken aback, _"Her skin's all pale; I don't think I've ever seen her eyes that fucking dark._" He observed quietly. Paul nodded slightly feeling quite ashamed that he and Rachael had let it escalate to this. Theodore then silently evaluated the bitterness between them;

"_Shit, son."_ He said,_ "It's bad, isn't it?_" Paul slowly nodded; Theodore looked back to the pile of sleeping children still holding onto Paul; "Do they have any clue?" He asked eyeing the older two; Paul nodded slightly;

_"Lily caught on, William—I don't know."_ He said honestly. The older man shook his head;

_"You two have t' figure something out."_ Theodore said slowly with a firm stance, Paul knew he was right. Theodore stood up and went into the kitchen; Paul tried not to eavesdrop. He heard the mumblings of Rachael; the deep, intimidating voice of Teddy—that always seemed to grow softer around the kids or Rachael. He only heard small blips of their conversation**—'oh really?**' he heard her say sarcastically; and his **'you two need to figure something out.'** From Teddy. Paul sighed; he and Teddy were on the same team; Rachael wouldn't even look at him. The two of them then appeared in the doorway still whisper-arguing, Teddy pointed at the kids sprawled out over Paul; and harshly made a point to her. Rachael threw up her arms; and hissed her argument back. Teddy had the look of an angry father on his face, Rachael just looked like she wanted to give everyone the finger and leave the country. Teddy then jerked his head around looking straight at Paul with a murderous look and motioned to him to come over to their discussion. Paul took William off first, placing him on the couch, then took off Lily laying her next to him, then Holly he put on the opposite couch, stationing her there with a pillow to keep her from rolling off. He then slowly made his way into the kitchen,

_"You two need to figure something out."_ Teddy bellowed when Paul walked in, Rachael glanced over at Paul;

_"No."_ She said quietly. Teddy looked pissed to say the absolute least. Paul studied him for a moment—he was quite literally huge; he had to be about 6'5 and was broad shouldered—quite the menacing bloke. He spoke with a thick Chicago accent, tangled with the Greek pronunciation of most things, Paul just stood there dumbly. Eventually Teddy began speaking in harsh Greek at Rachael who listened, looked hurt, glanced back at the kids in the living room, and closed her eyes.

_"Now."_ Teddy said, returning to English, _"You need to, Rachael."_ She shrugged looking defeated and Teddy glanced at Paul, _"You too, kid."_ Rachael looked awkwardly again past Paul's shoulder at the little kids, Teddy caught the look in understanding, _"But, you can't do it here."_ He ordered, Paul looked over towards the front door taking control,

_"We'll go t' mine, Rach."_ Theodore nodded, told Rachael to go, and returned to the living room flipping on the telly quietly whilst grabbing Holly to snuggle with as he sat down.

Paul nodded towards the front door with his hands shoved deeply in his pockets, and so they were off. The entire car ride neither of them spoke a word. And when he arrived at the house, it wasn't much better. They went inside and stood there awkwardly—what was he to do?


	50. Chapter 50

**A/N: SORRY I'VE BEEN GONE! I totally destroyed my laptop and the rest of this story! It's alight though, the computer guy said he can fix it! Alright, new chapter. Read, review, comments, suggestions, that whole bit! Alright, I love you, enjoy.**

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Rachael's P.O.V.

I really didn't want to be here. Paul led me to the kitchen table whilst I followed quietly. He took a seat, as did I. For the duration there was silence. That was when Martha made her appearance. She was wagging her stub of a tail fiercely as she made her way over putting her head on my lap. I scratched her ears petting her lightly—she really was a fantastic dog.

"She missed you, you know?" He said quietly. Did he think this would make this any easier? I nodded slightly acknowledging his statement. After a moment I finally ousted it and asked,

"So what are we doing with Lily?" For a moment he went silent. I continued wanting nothing more than to get this over with, "Are we doing every other day or—" At that he cut me off.

Paul's P.O.V.

He couldn't bloody believe what she was asking—he knew things were bad, but still she wasn't even trying to talk it out.

"Rachael," He said slowly, "You can't be serious?" She slowly nodded.

"I am. So… every other day until—"

"Rachael." He snapped, she merely looked calm raising an eyebrow as if to ask, 'what?'. "I don't want t' switch off with Lily every other bloody day—" She merely put up a hand,

"Every week then?" She looked completely affected—he was going mad. He shook his head,

"No, I want all th' kids, Holly and William—" She finally snapped,

"No. They're not yours." He couldn't believe her, and at that they both went at it,

"They're just as much mine as they are yours!" He exclaimed throwing up a hand, she looked appalled,

"No they're not! Lily is half yours, that's it!" At that he slammed his fist down on the table,

"Rachael I can't bloody believe your trying to do this!" She looked completely amazed in a sarcastic outraged manner, she thumbed herself,

"I'm doing this? PAUL YOU LIED ABOUT GETTING HER KNOCKED UP AND LEAVING!" His temper boiled over and he stood up slightly,

"I DIDN'T BLOODY LEAVE! YOU'RE JUST AS BAD. WHAT WAS THE FIRST THING YOU DID WHEN YOU GOT PREGNANT? YOU FUCKING WALKED OUT, RACHAEL!" She slowly began to stand up, he could tell she pissed to no end. When she shouted her Chicago accent got thicker; her 'A's' became harsher, and she got a murderous look in her eyes. He couldn't believe the set of pipes this bird had on her, she was just as loud if not entirely louder than he was,

"I LEFT FOR A GOOD REASON. YOU WOULD'VE WALKED OUT ON ME AS SOON AS SHE WAS BORN—WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT OF STICKING AROUND!?" Not they were standing across the table from each other shouting their heads to the point of blowing off,

"NO I WOULD'NT HAVE!" He exclaimed, then brought his voice to deathly harsh whisper, "I apologized about Dorothy. Fucking accept it." She smirked,

"Go fuck yourself." He threw up his hands,

"Really mature, Rachael." She shrugged,

"That makes one of us."

"We're not switching 'er back 'nd forth like a bloody toy, Rachael." She threw up her hands looking defeated,

"Fine. Let's take it to court." He nearly shook with anger,

"We're not taking it t' th' bleedin' courts." He hissed,

"You better lawyer up, asshole. If we're not switching her, I'm keeping her." He exploded, his arm shot out pushing with it the stack of plates on the counter. She didn't look shocked in the least bit. Plates shattered frighteningly the instant they touched the tile. They exploded making a mess but he went on,

"NO YOU'RE NOT!" At that she grabbed her purse reaching for her coat.

"Fuck you." She mumbled, he walked swiftly over grabbing her around the waist,

"You can't leave everytime there's a little problem!" She stopped rigid,

"LITTLE!?" So maybe he exaggerated just a bit, "LITTLE!? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW THIS 'LITTLE' PROBLEM BECAME SO FREAKING BIG ALL OF THE SUDDEN?! I HAVE THE PRESS OUTSIDE MY DOOR, I CAN'T TAKE THE KIDS ANYWHERE, I CAN'T LOOK AT MAGAZINES, NEWSPAPERS, I CAN'T WATCH THE T.V. I CAN'T EVEN LISTEN TO THE RADIO BECAUSE OF THIS 'LITTLE' PROBLEM. I DON'T EVEN KNOW DOROTHY, BUT OBVIOUSLY SHE KNEW YOU PRETTY FUCKING WELL." He cringed, he'd read what Dorothy had written before his lawyers managed to shut down the printings of it, she'd said nasty things—awful things, she was partially to blame to be completely honest. She'd told him she was relieved when she lost the baby. And at the time he didn't blame her. But she'd also written of his temper… to be honest he really didn't think his was that bad—he'd seen a lot worse.

"RACHAEL! THAT'S THE THING WITH YOU, YOU'VE BEEN READY TO WALK OUT ON ME SINCE DAY ONE!" She tried walking away from him again, and he grabbed her wrist, she wasn't getting out of this that easy.

"Just stop." She said quietly. "Just let it go. Let me go." The anger and hate in her voice was gone. There wasn't a thing left. His anger suddenly left as well; like someone had knocked it out of him miraculously.

"No." he said quietly, "No more walking out." They were both silent for the longest time. The house was deadened from noise—only a small tick of a clock, and for the first time in his life you could hear a pin drop. At once he felt a tear slide down his cheek—the dam broke and they came spilling out. She was no better, he could feel her shaking, still looking away from him. At once she merely gave up trying to leave—he wasn't going to let her, she knew that, and admittedly he'd grabbed her pretty hard on the arm and the waist. Nevermore she sat at the kitchen table putting her head down sobbing short tears.

They flowed down his cheeks as well. He couldn't believe it'd gotten to this. He couldn't think straight.

He saw the tiny bump under her shirt, those were his. He couldn't help but cry from the fact that the best thing that had probably ever happened to him—hated him from the inside out. She couldn't even look at him. He hadn't meant to yell—he was just so bloody frustrated, she walked out—he was pissed—both of their tempers combined was absolutely lethal and to top it all off, the press was on their back. He was sure if he stopped short when he walked, they'd literally crawl up his arse.

He couldn't help it, he reached out putting a hand on her back, she instantly tensed up and said,

"I'm done." She said quietly. He couldn't exactly speak, his throat was constricted in regret. She stood up slightly. Paul couldn't control himself; he picked her up propelling her to the counter not two feet away. She was so light from being sick and being on her feet all day—he wished she'd get better, he knew this pregnancy was taking a hell of a toll on her. She would feel fine some days, but others she'd get violently sick and unable to function semi-normally.

He stood there for a moment in front of her—blocking her escape. She wouldn't even look up.

He noticed the bump again—there were going to be two babies; two babies that would never know what it was like to have a mummy and daddy together. They'd never have a normal life, a normal home, they'd always be somehow separated. He was sick to think that he was the cause of that. He'd wrecked two lives that weren't even here yet. Their mum was sick, their dad was pissed off at the world, their older brother and sisters didn't know what was going on—they were too young to understand why he and Rachael weren't like other mummy's and daddy's, they didn't understand how notorious they both were, they still didn't understand the press, they were just flat out little kids who'd been dealt the card of famous parents.

He shook at the thought of what life would be like down the road—how would they separate birthdays, holidays, hell—every days. Who would get them during school, who would get weekends, and the bloody simplest of all—who'd get to take care of them when they were sick. Who would get to see their first steps, hear their first words—their first anythings.

Paul reached out placing a hand on that bump, it surely had grown just a tad bit. She tensed up and he quietly said, "I'm allowed t' touch you, Rach." She stared over his shoulder, tears were falling from her eyes same as his.

Those eyes. He didn't think he could ever forget them, insanely dark—the darkest he'd ever seen, he could easily get lost in them. He'd fallen in crazy, stupid and insane love with them.

The crying got worse; this was the hardest he'd ever cried before. She was nearing hysterical when she pushed past him and grabbed her bag. He thought she was to leave, but she shakily pulled out a piece of paper.

She handed it to him. It took him a moment to remember how to work his arms, but he did. He nearly passed out at the title; SHARED CUSTODY AGREEMENT.

He went on to read.

**RACHEL NOELLE BELTER(Defendant) , JAMES PAUL McCARTNEY, do hereby agree that biological child, LILLIAN MARY BELTER shall be in the joint custody of their natural Parents, and it is further agreed:**

**The General Assembly declares that it is the public policy of this Commonwealth, when in the best interest of the child, to assure a reasonable and continuing contact of the child with both p**arents after a separation or dissolution of the marriage and the sharing of the rights and responsibilities of child rearing by both parents and continuing contact of the child or children.

**The custody agreement for above stated child shall continue until that child reaches the age of eighteen years, or, if the child is still attending schooling at the age of eighteen years, until the child reaches the age of nineteen years or graduates from schooling, or is otherwise emancipated, Whichever occurs first.**

**Both Plaintiff and Defendant agree to the physical and legal care of the above stated child.**

**Sole physical and/or legal custody will be awarded upon: Death, inability to care for the above stated child, crisis, etc.**

**Both legal guardians are supervised under the court of law.**

**Both legal guardians can determine time management of the child.**

**Both legal guardians have the right to an attorney and/or any other legal representative.**

**Subscribed and sworn before me the 11 day of December , 1968.**

**Signature & Date:_.**

He began to lower the pen to the paper. His breath caught in his throat. What in the bloody world was he doing? A week ago he had waltzed her around the living room in Scotland to 'their' song. How in the world did it get to this? Thoughts burned his eyes-

Rachael with the kids. William and Lillian playing. Holly in her Arms.

**The pen inched closer.**

Holly their littlest baby, how funny Rachael thought the baby was.

**Closer**.

William and Lillian refusing to sleep in their own rooms. Needing to be no farther than arms length at all times.

**The ink touched.**

The occasional giggle he could get from Rachael. How sweet and loving she was with him.

**The sharp contrast of the ink and the crisp white paper.**

Dorothy Rhone.

**A swift movement of the ballpoint pen.**

Smashed glass.

**The first name- James.**

Her shouting.

**Last Name- McCartney.**

His screamed curses.

**Date- 12/8/68.**

Baby clothes.

**Black markings.**

Babies crying.

**I accept partial custody of the before mentioned child LILLIAN MARY BELTER.**

The threats.

**I accept.**

That bump under her shirt.

**And agree to the partial care and wellbeing of LILLIAN MARY BELTER.**

A lost cause.

**Sign and Date.**

A broken home.

**Can't be erased.**

Rachael.

**Marked in ink.**

There is was. He legally had a daughter. He stared at the papers her birth certificate-5 pounds 6 ounces, born June 18th of 1962 at King's College Hospital. Premature by three weeks. He then looked to the rest of the document, they were signed by a lawyer. It had all of Lillian's information. He shook slightly feeling his stomach clench, he was going to be sick. What about those two babies due in a few months? Was he going to have to sign these papers twice more?

A sick thought came to his mind. Where would he be when those two babies were born? A week ago he was planning on being in that room with her helping it along. He now doubted that they'd even let him near her. He shook even harder-what would it be then? Would she just drop them both off with Lily? Would the first time he met his new babies be at his front door? Would they even speak? Who would get holidays? Birthdays? Who would get to take care of them when they were sick? Could he take them with him on vacation? What about when he spent the weekend with his family in Liverpool? Could he take them with?

A very little girl.

Two babies.

Himself.

A single dad now.

Rachael.

A very little girl.

Two babies.

Herself.

A single mum again.

Two other children

A baby.

A little boy.

No one was together.

Everyone was separate.

He shook even harder choking back a breath. He looked up to find Rachael looking away refusing to make eye contact, she couldn't look at him.

He remembered some of the worst fights he'd had with Jane-she was too independent, too on her own way, she didn't want to be soldered together-she wasn't in for the long haul. But he then looked up at Rachael-he'd spent so much time fighting. Arguing about stupid things he'd done that she wanted no part of. He apologized for the Dorothy incident, he apologized for screaming, he'd apologized for not being the greatest all the time. But she still wanted no part of him, she had other things to do; kids to take care of, a home to take care of, a sick little boy to take care of, a baby, a little girl, a father waiting at home, and she didn't have time to argue with him.

"So..." She swallowed, "M-Monday." She was shaking as well, only slightly so, "You can have her." He gulped ins breath, feeling ready to explode but the tightness in his chest was dibilitating,

"Love," Shemjust shook her head taking the papers back,

"My lawyer will drop off a copy." She put back on her coat quickly and tightened the waist, tucked her hair behind her right ear in habit, threw her purse over her shoulder and grabbed the papers. She was starting to walkout when he said,

"I'll drive-" she just shook her head quietly.

"_No_ _thank_ _you_." Whilst she opened the door. He watched his pregnant girl leave in the frigid weather,

"_Rachael_," he tried, "_it's so cold, I insist_-" once again she turned away avoiding eye contact.

_"No more, I'm done, thank you Paul." _

She left.

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What do you think? Suggestions, comments?


	51. Chapter 51

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry I haven't posted lately! I've been sorta busy! If you're still reading this, thanks, I suck! Okay tell me what you think, happy reading!**

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Paul's P.O.V.

He laid on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Monday came, his day to pick up Lillian—11 o'clock as promised. He'd be there for sure, he wasn't about to screw this up. He was a wreck, he hadn't slept or eaten properly in days. He got to Rachael's on time and rang the gate like a stranger, when opened he pulled in and got out of the car into the frigid December air. It was the 9th of the month. This time it was Theodore Belter who met him at the door,

"_Hey, Paulie."_ The old man said. He noted the absence of activity behind the gentleman,

"_Hello_." The old man looked strained in his eyes; in the midst of a horrid custody agreement,

"_Lily_!" Theodore called, he heard a thump from upstairs whilst Theodore explained, "_Rach went t' the doctor with William. Poor kids has had a fever nonstop._" Paul nodded, "_Took Holly along with her_." Paul frowned he didn't get a chance to get a glimpse of either of them. With that Theodore called again, "_Come on, sweetheart, your daddy is here_." He called again. There wasn't an answer, Theodore sighed nodding his head,

"_Come on in, I'll get her_." Paul consented walking into the house, he watched Theodore climb upstairs. He looked around for a moment, toys were strewn on the floor in a homey, playful manner—his house was nowhere near as comforting. That was when a shrieking Lily came downstairs, being held by the old gentleman.

_"I want Willy!"_ She shrieked, Paul grimaced and Theodore tried to console her,

_"Baby doll, you'll see him sooner than you know."_ She shook her head in sheer panic,

"_No, no, no!"_ Theodore looked strained,

"_Do you want your mom?"_ Lily quickly shook her head, _"Do you want your dad?"_ Once again she shook her head, _"Babe, you're going to your dad's house, okay?_" She wasn't even listening anymore, she was closing her eyes and crying so hard Paul was nearly sure she'd be sick. At last the older gentleman handed her off to him, and gave him the overnight bag as well, "_I'd get out of here quick, if she sees the other kids it's going to get worse."_ Paul nodded and shook the gentleman's hand and tried to make his way out,

_"I want Will!"_ She sobbed again, He sighed, he wanted everyone. When at last they were out at the car he buckled her in, she was still a wreck he was nearing it himself. He felt like shouting at her to stop crying—but he couldn't, it wasn't her fault. _"No!"_ She cried again kicking her little legs out. He couldn't even look in the rearview mirror anymore, he was sure he'd die.

When at last they pulled up to his house, there were gatebirds; he ignored them thoroughly pulling through. He got as close to the house as he could so outsiders couldn't see into his life. He got out of the car taking a breath and opened the back to get Lillian out. She was shrieking bloody murder now, he unbuckled her;

_"Come on, love."_ He tried, every time he tried to reach out for her she scooted away. He stood there for what felt like forever before he grabbed her and just took her inside. She tried wiggling away but he held her tight.

"_Down_." He sobbed trying to wiggle away, he ignored it and held on tight locking the car and getting the front door shut. He finally had to put her down; for she was wiggling and trying to twist away from him, he might've dropped her. She hightailed it the hell away from him running upstairs with Martha bounding after her. He rubbed his forehead. This sucked.

He heard one of the doors upstairs slam and he took off his coat, putting down her bag and listening—she was still crying, wailing more like it. He stood there for a while feeling numb in a strange, morbid way it felt better to have an upset child in the house than none at all. After a while he climbed the stairs noting that the guest bedrooms door was shut, that was where she was. He knocked on the door,

"_Love?"_ She cried still giving no answer to his call. He nudged the door a bit with his knee feeling a slight pull towards the bottom, she was sitting against the door. He knocked again, _"Come on out, darling."_ But the sadness had no end. He took a seat himself in front of the door, having only a wooden door separating them.

She went on for a good half an hour and when at last there was only sniffles and sobs he knocked a bit. Not harshly, just a nudge. There wasn't an answer. He waited a bit and tried again, without a resounding call.

He waited longer and was nearing ready to go get something to open the lock, but suddenly there was a tiny knock back. He waited a moment, and knocked twice. She took a minute and knocked back. Paul smiled slightly at this, knocking a few more times, to which she answered. When at last he stopped, she did as well.

"_Hey?"_ He whispered, a while past before came a mumbled but whispered,

"_What?"_ He smiled slightly,

"_Is Martha in there?"_ He could hear her putting her head to the door to listen,

"_Yeah."_ He chuckled slightly putting his head against the door as well,

"_Do you want t' come out?"_ The little girl was leaning against the door now,

"_No."_ He frowned slightly at the whispered answer,

"_Why not?"_ He tried, there was a short breath and a hint of sadness,

"_Because then I have t' go back to mummy's_." He frowned feeling the heat of her words, he shook his head,

"_You don't have t' go back to mummy's until tomorrow night."_ He whispered. There was a short sigh. There wasn't a chance she was coming out without force,

"_So you're not coming out then?"_ He queried,

"_I dunno."_ He thought for a moment,

_"Wait here, I'll be back_." He got up and went downstairs to grab some paper and crayons.

He took a seatback in front of the door once again, and took a piece of paper drawing a quick flower on it and sliding it under the door with a crayon. There was a slight shift from her end as she took it, he could see her little hands. She pulled back and he could hear the crayon going. After a while came back the piece of paper with a sun over the flower he'd just drawn. He smiled at it and pulled it back under.

Paul went to town drawing himself on the paper, with a purple shirt and black pants and pushed it under once more. This time was waiting for it and took it back. It was a quick few minutes until it came back, this time there was a dog next to himself, he chuckled at the depiction—Martha was merely a scribble of black and grey with a red tongue in her eyes. He drew the little girl as well, next to himself mind you. He gave her a purple dress and shoved it back under.

They went at it for a while until the paper was saturated in scribbles surrounding the little girl and himself.

There wasn't any room left to draw; by now the ice had melted slightly between them. They were both laying on their stomachs with the door separating the area. She had a tiny hand under the two inch gap from the door to the wooden floor, on his side. He tentatively reached out for it. She didn't pull back at all. She merely let him put his hand atop hers. At last they'd both grown tired of the paper, he knocked again.

Finally she pulled her hand away and stood up, he backed away getting to his knees and waited. She opened the door slightly peeking out; those big brown eyes were still watery and her cheeks were tear stained. Paul held out arms for her and she quickly ran into him as he held on tight. This was where she belonged. He stroked her hair,

"_Hi, baby."_ She mumbled something short of a hello, and played with his ear. Paul smiled and scooped her up hugging on tight still. "_Did you have fun at mummy's?"_ She started crying at that and he could've shot himself in the forehead, he hadn't meant to remind her. He held on tight rocking slowly and shushing, she merely was wiped out; completely done with this situation. He bounced around still shushing and stroking the hair away from her eyes—he felt like a complete arse, he was the reason she was so upset. "_Come 'ead, love. No more tears_." He tried to explain, "_I didn't mean t' hurt you little darling_." He apologized quietly. She wasn't listening anymore and merely said,

"_Put me down."_ He shook his head same as always;

"_No more locking doors, baby."_ She wailed even louder and he flinched, she certainly had a set of lungs on her same as he and Rachael did.

"_I want—DOWN!"_ She shrieked, he flinched once again. She was twisting away so fiercely he had to. At the she ripped away and ran downstairs. He leaned back against the wall watching her sprint down the stairs. He felt like crying himself; but refused to let any of the kids see him cry. So cooled off for a moment walking to the bedroom to throw on pajamas and get ready for bed. When he was ready he took a breath and made his way downstairs.

He heard the little girl crying whilst mumbling something. He eavesdropped in to find she was laying atop of the dog crying and talking to her. The two were in the far sitting room which wasn't really used all that much.

_"And I miss my Holly too."_ She said to the dog patting her head whilst tears were running down her face. The dog was lapping up the tears sensing the urgency of the horrid situation. _"But my mummy takes care of my William because he is sick."_ She explained to the dog, "_And my mummy 'nd my daddy don't see each other anymore. My auntie Mo says it's because sometimes things aren't good."_ Paul bit his thumb and willed himself not to tear up, _"And I don't want to be at my mummy's house. Or here. So maybe you 'nd me should go away together."_ Paul slumped down against the wall to listen in on her conversation._ "And now when we look outside me and Willy see those ladies that shout and those boys with the cameras."_ Paul put his head down knowing she didn't understand the press one bit. _"And they yell at mummy a lot too. She says it's okay though. They yell at my auntie Mo too. And my uncle Ritchie, even my uncle John and uncle Georgie."_ She went on, _"So maybe that's different."_ She was still crying whilst he listened to her trying to figure things out for herself, _"I don't like it very much."_ She was quiet for a while before she went on, _"I get scared when my daddy's not there. Will does too, but Holly's still a baby so she doesn't not understand. But you probably don't get scared 'cuz you're a puppy, right?"_ The dog was still calm whilst the little girl laid on top of her and she continued crying holding her face against the dog's fur.

At last he couldn't take it anymore, he stood up pulling himself up and got into the room trying to pick up the little girl,

_"NO!"_ She said, getting ready to bolt once again, he frowned kneeling down,

"_Lillian_—" She cut him off at that,

_"You're not my daddy!"_ And with that she ran away out of the room. He put his aching head in his hands, he got back up and found her trying to open the front door; but she was far too short, and the knob was about a foot above her head. He watched for a moment knowing her escape was futile for the deadbolt was locked and the bloody army couldn't break down that large, solid wood door. She stopped trying to reach for the handle and tried pushing the door instead, she was miniscule in comparison; being only 30 pounds, very petite indeed.

She went on trying to kick the door, and slapping her hands against it crying even harder. He just watched the scene fall to bits,

_"I WANT MY WILLIAM!"_ She shrieked taking a foot to the door, "_AND MY HOLLY!"_ And she kept at slapping the door in her whirlwind. That was when she turned to him screaming all bloody give up, "_WHY CAN'T THEY COME WITH ME?"_ She didn't give him a chance to respond, she went at him hitting his knees with all her might; it didn't hurt him in the least bit—it felt like little pats but she was trying to cause him the same pain as he was causing her, "_I HATE THIS_!" She screeched, _"I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU OR MUMMY ANYMORE."_ And with that she tried to kick his feet; which still didn't hurt—it felt like a nudge. _"YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!"_ She repeated trying to hit his knees again. _"I WISHED I NEVER EVER MEETED YOU, EVER! I WISH MY MUMMY AND ME STAYED AT THE PLACE WITH PHILLIP! AND I WISH THAT YOU AND MUMMY WOULD GO AWAY!"_

_"Lillian—"_ He warned, but she kept going,

_"I WANT UNCLE MIKE—HE DOESN'T LEAVE. OR GRANDPA—"_ At once his temper boiled,

_"Lillian, I didn't leave!"_ She was still shrieking all hell,

"_YOU DID! YOU LEFTED LOT'S OF TIMES_!" She kept at it, "_AND NOW YOU LEFT MY WILLIAM AND MY HOLLY BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT HERE WITH ME!"_ He couldn't control himself,

"_I didn't leave, they're at your mum's house, no one left!_" She stamped her foot looking up at him with hatred,

_"YOU DID. YOU LEFTED, AND YOU AND MUMMY ARGUE—AND NO ONE IS HAPPY ANYMORE."_ He couldn't fight that, but he couldn't believe the rise the five year old was getting out of him,

_"IT'S NOT MY FAULT!"_ This little bird certainly had a set of pipes on her—she was almost shouting as loudly as he was,

_"YES IT IS! BEFORE WE KNOWED YOU NO ONE YELLED 'N NO ONE CRIED LOTS! YOU'RE THE REASON WHY I CAN'T BE WITH MY HOLLY AND MY WILLIAM. IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!"_ And with that she went off in a storm upstairs, leaving him a final time.

"_LILLIAN MARY McCARTNEY_—" He shouted at the girl stomping her hardest upstairs, _"YOU GET BACK HERE, LITTLE LADY. YOU DO NOT SPEAK TO ME_—" She gave him the middle finger.

_"That's not my name. It's Belter._" She stomped the rest of the way up.

His mouth dropped open. He couldn't believe what the five year old had unleashed upon him—she'd definitely picked that up from either him or Rachael—they tried their hardest not to do inappropriate things around the kids but neither of them were perfect.

Lillian had gone from being upset that he and Rachael weren't together, to wishing them away. He couldn't believe it for a moment; she unwished the entire situation. Hell as bad as it was he couldn't imagine Lillian not being around, ever. He didn't regret the baby one bit.

He waited nearly an hour to regain feeling when he trekked upstairs. All the doors were open and he found a curled up baby on the guest bed. He quietly leaned over kissing her forehead, she woke up suddenly and turned around harshly saying,

_"I'm sleeping."_ He just watched the little thing; so full of hate and despair because of his actions. He sighed,

_"I love you, Lillian."_ She just pointed to the door. He got up completely defeated and went off to his own room.

He passed out thoroughly exhausted. Bit then he felt a nudge, another, and another. He woke up slightly opening one eye, he found a tiny little wide eyed girl with incredibly long lashes looking slightly up at him whilst she was hugging onto her stuffed sheepdog. He sighed ready for her to call him out with hate again, but the sweet thing did no such thing.

"_Hi_." He said quietly, she looked down a bit at her toes. _"Are you lonely tonight?"_ She nodded and reached up arms slightly, he complied quickly picking her up—he definitely knew the feeling, he hated sleeping alone. She settled in quickly leaning into his shoulder and getting comfortable, that was when she mumbled a short,

"_Sorry, daddy."_ He shook his head,

_"It's alright, love."_ And with that she was attached to him again. He rocked for a bit longer she was still looking up at him with baby eyes; he felt awful—why did he have to have such a horrid relationship with her mummy?

_"How come my Holly 'nd my William can't come with me here_?" He gulped back a short breath finally having to explain it,

_"Because sometimes…"_ He stopped at that; he didn't want to say that William and Holly weren't biologically his, he wanted the girl to love her brother and sister the same as she always had. "_Because sometimes mummy and daddy argue."_ He admitted. She looked up at him whilst he held her,

_"Auntie Mo says it's because sometimes things aren't good."_ He nodded agreeing to the statement, Maureen had summed it up perfectly. But then she asked, "_Why can't things be good then? And then you could come to live with all of us forever."_ He was heartbroken at the question. Hell, he didn't know.

_"I…"_ He sighed, _"I don't know."_ She looked up at him like he should've known the answer. He wished badly that he did. He wished that he could give her what she wanted. He couldn't. Her lip quivered slightly; _"Oh come 'ead love, no need for crying."_ He tried, she did though. She shook quietly whilst tears ran down her cheeks, he brought her back to his shoulder rocking her same as he did Holly,

_"I want to live here with you, daddy."_ She mumbled. He nodded slowly. She was clinging onto him afraid to let go, he rubbed her back slightly—how in the world had this happened so quickly? But then he said,

_"But you still have to live with your mummy."_ She shook her head and said,

_"No more."_ He sighed trying to explain it to her,

_"Sweetheart, you have t' spend half the time with mummy, and half th' time with me."_ He attempted, she shook her head,

_"No. 'Cuz I don't want t' leave my Holly or my William again."_ She was still sobbing, he got up to walk around with her shushing and bouncing slightly—what in the world had he just told him? She wanted to stay here full time because she couldn't handle having to leave her siblings. He couldn't do this anymore. After a bit she was too tired to carry on with it so she passed out.

He did as well.


	52. Chapter 52

**A/N: Hey I haven't updated in forever! I don't know if anyone is still reading this story, but I still have lots to post! I am definitely going to get better about updating more often, I promise!**

**P.S. This chapter really sucks, I wrote it in like five minutes, review it if you feel like it though! It means the world to me.**

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**Paul's P.O.V.**

He woke in the morning to a little girl sleeping atop his chest, he sat up slightly groggily shaking his head—that was the first time he'd actually slept peacefully in a while. Lillian woke up as well groggily rubbing her tired eyes as she sat up looking right at him. He had to grin at her sleepy disposition,

**"Good morning, love."** She merely sighed and crawled to the other side of the bed shoving her head underneath a pillow and quickly fell back to sleep. He chuckled lightly at her attitude raising an eyebrow, he rolled over picking up the pillow and pulled her back to his chest. **"Good morning."** He greeted. She sleepily opened one eye and patted his cheek before closing it again.

He chuckled openly at her tired attitude and got out of bed nearly tripping over Martha whilst he pulled Lillian along cuddling her close before having a walk downstairs. He quickly got their day started having a go at the teapot and managed to find a loaf of bread which was a surprise for there wasn't really ever food in the home. Paul managed to brown slices whilst Lillian sat on the counter watching him in action.

He readied it all dropping a slice for the insistent Martha before getting everything situated at the table along with the five year old who clearly was no morning person. He ate almost immediately whereas Lillian's attention was immediately diverted outside,

"**I'm going t' go play."** She asserted at once her eyes widening at the prospect of snow. He pointed to the toast.

"**Brekky first."** She glanced back not at all interested slowly sliding off her seat. Her head disappeared under the table and he choked back a laugh trying to be authoritative. **"Lily, love, I'm not kidding."** The last he heard was little knees crawling across the tile before she reappeared and readied to make a sprint past him. He busted up laughing and caught her at once, she wiggled desperately looking like a manic for the snow but he sat her in his lap making her at least have half the slice before letting her loose. He helped put on her snow attire, bundling her up so tight it was a wonder to how she could move—he then sent her on her way out the back letting her have a go, Martha tagged along as well.

He watched for a long while; she was tireless playing with the dog, eating snow, making snowballs; a cute thing really.

But then the heads started peering over the wall. It bothered him somewhat that people at the gates tried talking to Lily. Most of the time she shied away, he didn't bloody blame her. She was merely trying to go on as normally as anyone else. He didn't like that in the least bit. He'd gotten a better gate recently; a rather large improvement from his last, more secure, and a hell of a lot bigger. He made a note to watch her out the window. Right now she seemed just fine throwing snowballs for Martha to chase. He went to go sit at the piano. That was when he heard the kitchen door slam, he quickly got up walking downstairs to find her standing there watching out the window. Apparently a few birds had gotten in the neighboring yard again. He frowned, she didn't know he was in the room. He quietly just watched. She waited for a while, then cautiously opened the door again checking. He wondered why she didn't come to him to tell him what was the matter. He then figured that she was still trying to figure it out for herself. Hell, she was only five, she didn't understand the extent of celebrity.

When she did step outside, she had Martha right alongside her. They both stood on the step for a moment before going back. When they did so all seemed clear. Once again he saw a few heads peek over the fence. She ignored them. Then he saw their mouths moving, Lily just waited a moment and then turned around walking back inside. When she did, she noticed him, barely glancing up and mumbling **'It's cold'**. She took a seat peeling off her gloves and hat whilst unzippering her coat and letting Martha help tug off her boots. Her next attempt was to take snow pants off. She left this all by the door still not looking at him and trailed off to find something else to occupy her time. He frowned leaning out the door way,

**"You couldn't leave her alone for ten minutes? She's five!"** At that the girls shrieked and giggled, he was pissed to no end, this was far from their crushes, after all she was just a little girl, **"Get lost, the neighbors or I'll call the police. "** The girls giggled hightailing it out of the neighbors' yard. He frowned, he was going to have to be more observant of that, he didn't really know what kind of people were out there; and what irked him was that he knew most of them were not nice. He picked up her sopping wet and frigid outerwear tossing most of it in the dryer, he figured it best, she'd probably want to go out to play in the snow when people weren't there. Paul meandered through the house after that looking about for her. he finally spotted her in the far sitting room he rarely if ever used. She was sitting looking out the window; her face was emotionless really, he knew she was trying to get a look into the yard to see if the girls were still there, she couldn't quite figure out why they hung around; it was a bit complex for a five year old to understand who he was.

She finally shook her head patting Martha and turned around; she stopped noticing him for a moment, she just looked him up and down with a forced movement of her eyebrows and walked out past him with a hand on the dogs head. He just watched her, her next stop was far down the hallway. He figured it best to leave her alone for a bit; she still wasn't terribly happy, nor was she yet totally comfortable here, he knew it'd take a few hours for her to warm up to this... again.

He spent his time generally pissing about, he played at the piano some, fixed a few things, went through mail, listened vaguely to the telly. He occasionally peeked in on Lillian. She spent her time playing with the dog, staring off into space, making an effort to play with toys that she didn't really have all that much enthusiasm for... he understood that she didn't like playing alone, she usually had William glued to her side, hell, she even played with Holly. So she stayed silent. It hit him pretty hard that there were only himself and the girl in this big house. It used to not feel lonely, hell, when he first bought it, it seemed full... now it seemed like a big empty space full of; what if's and what should've beens. The little girl didn't like being alone; she'd gone from Rachael's house having a mum and two other children m to coming here where it was just him and a dog. She didn't even complain anymore, not that she really had. She just accepted it as reality; her mum and dad weren't together, so she had to live to separate lives. He trailed in with a smile, **"Hey, love, what're you doing?"** She was staring off into space, she just glanced over at him with a blank expression,

**"Nothing."** She said solemnly. He cringed slightly,

**"D'you want t' play with me?"** She shook her head slightly, just watching him. He decided to play it off, "Awh, why not, darling?" She just shrugged and plainly stated,

**"Don't want to."** He just stood there with his hands in his pockets. She stared off into space once again. He tried a different approach,

**"Are you hungry?"** She shook her head, **"Tired?"** Once again came the shake of her head ,"**Feeling alright?"** She nodded, **"Cold?"** She shook her head, **"Oh."** He merely bit the inside of his cheek. He just scanned her over. Her long dark hair was hanging past her shoulder and she was wearing a simple pair of little jeans along with a red shirt. So he took a seat in a chair a bit closer to her, she didn't say much, still seated on the carpet next to the dog staring at the wall. He just frowned, she didn't look happy in the least bit. **"What're you looking at?"** She merely answered,

"**A wall."** Simple answer was really all it was. He got up off the chair and walked over having a seat next to her. They sat together for a bit. He just watched down at her out of the corner of his eye. Then he nudged her lightly. There wasn't a response. Eventually he quietly asked,

**"What're we going to do?"** She just shrugged. He frowned picking her up to place on his lap. Martha looked quite jealous but didn't make an action about it. He held her tightly for a bit, pulling her head against his chest and keeping still. Eventually she relaxed enough to sit comfortably and play with his hands.

He made rash decision at once, **"Do you want to come play at the piano with me?"** She nodded. So they went.

The next two days went by much too fast. They stayed in the entire time merely playing whatever she wanted and keeping quiet. He'd never really been more relaxed, she was such an easy little thing to be with.

But there were times when it got a bit difficult. She wasn't big on eating, mealtimes were a bit of a hassle. Bed time was rough as well. She was used to having Rachael there every night; and he had to somehow fill that space, which was no easy feat. Most nights she'd go to bed crying because she missed Rachael, William and Holly so much—needless to say it killed him. But somehow it went on.

But then came the time to switch her back to Rachael.

* * *

I know, crappy. But I promise the next will be better. Review it!


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